Giggling about gifts, gender reveals, and interventions

Hannah, I know you're picky with your headphones, so you're actually going to love these. They're called Noom 1, N-W-M-1 is how it's spelled.
Oh, those are those ones from Japan. Wait, they actually look so cool.
They're like futuristic looking, like it's like a donut around your ear. Like they're like open back headphones and there's no sound leakage.
I've heard of these. And they use this technology called PSZ.
It's personalized sound zone, which lets you enjoy your music without anyone disrupting you, which is perfect for me on a plane. Also, you don't disturb anyone around you because I don't want anyone knowing what I'm listening to or what like murder podcasts I'm trying to get to the bottom of, solve a mystery.
Yeah, it creates like a bubble of sound around your ear which is really cool and it's lightweight i hate when it's heavy and it's like it just feels like it's weighing on my little ears and the battery lasts up to 20 hours on a single charge so there's like not a lot of admin you can wear them anywhere they're perfect from working from home hanging out with your family or if a plane, just vibing. And guess what? They're available right now on Amazon and there's even a limited time discount happening.
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What's up, gigglers?

Gary, fix the Wi-Fi.

Manifest that shit.

We can't be managed.

I mean, the day just got away from me. What's up, my grappling with our existence gigglers.
That was one of my better ones. That's a good one.
I thought of it this morning. I am grappling with my existence.
You know, why like some weeks or just some days you're like so in your head? Yeah. You know what? This is probably wrong, but like I feel like I just have like low dopamine days.

Okay, I've been on ADHD TikTok.

But I used to,

like you know when you're feeling like shit

and then you're like,

I'm depressed.

Like I'm a depressed person.

Now I'm just like,

oh, I'm having a low dopamine day

and I just like lean in

and Des will be like,

are you okay?

And I'm like,

my dopamine is low. Like it's like my blood sugar is low now that I have my period again I've been like tracking all my oh okay advent queen okay woman in stem literally I've been tracking like my mood I'm normal one week of the month like it's not it's actually not funny like here's how it I have my period.
I'm done with it. Yeah.
Then I'm normal for like that next week. Yeah.
Then the following weekend, all I want to do is have sex. Then the following week after that, my boobs get huge.
I'm in that phase right now. Then I get my period the next week.
Isn't it funny? I feel like we either all we want to do is have sex or all we want to do is not be touched and there's like no one there's no in between like i actually actually actually people are always like oh well this is really more because i'm like so deep in love island like oh do you like a cuddle do you want like a cuddle and it's like as i get older no i don, I don't. When they say cuddle, do they mean fingering? No, I think they mean snuggling in bed.
And I don't. And then I'm like, am I weird? But I'm like, no, we just had sex.
Get the fuck away from me. I need a couple minutes by myself.
Separate beds, I feel like, will be normalized in marriages. No, like, bring back the 1950s when we, like, slept in separate beds and, like, basically had our own rooms.
Honestly, go out and cheat on me all the time. I don't give a fuck as long as you're leaving me the hell alone.
Because you're ever, like, ready to have, like, a great sleep, which is all the time. And then you hear your man's, like, snoring.
And then you could just feel his body heat. Yeah.
And you're just like, this would be so much better if. And some women actually complain like, oh, men like fall right to sleep when their head hits the pillow.
Good. Shut your mouth.
Give me the remote. Like, let me have 15 minutes after you fall asleep to decompress.
What's your opinion on TVs in the bedroom? Love it. I think you're psychotic.
I think like my parents at a young age were like no TV in the bedroom. So I thought that was a rule like forever.
Like I'm a full, I'm 32 years old. I was like, we can't have TVs in the bedroom.
That's illegal. I think for someone who rots as much as you do in

the bed, you have to switch up your little screen to the big screen to the medium screen. Like I can't just be little screen all day or I go insane.
My problem, actually my morning routine is so bad and I need to talk about it because I will finally get up, which is, you know, a battle. and then I go to the couch where I can lay down.

Yeah.

That's not really waking up. But in my head, I'm like, she's up.
Yeah. But like you haven't started your day at all.
And then you're like, next thing you know, it's 3 p.m. Right.
For the past six months, I like haven't slept in. What do you do? I cry.
Well, I've been going to bed earlier. It turns out when you go to bed earlier, you do wake up earlier, which is like a crazy thing.
And that's a pyramid scheme. It's a literal Ponzi scheme.
Speaking of different screens, I actually want to ask you this. I know we're like starting out kind of dirty.
Sorry, Kim.

When you watch porn, big screen or little screen?

And do you think it's generational?

Because for some reason when I watch porn, I have to go to my laptop.

That's, I think that's okay.

That's insane, but I feel like I can't even say that because what I'm about to say is even more insane.

Oh, by myself on little screen. I'm on my phone.
Okay. Oh yeah.
I thought, I forgot you have like a whole team. Not gonna lie.
This is a crazy story. I'm going to tell it because it's so good and it's never been told.
And Craig like literally wouldn't let me tell it on the pod when it first happened because he was so traumatized by it. And I was like, this is one of the best stories ever.
So one time me and Craig were in his living room. OK.
And we're on the couch. I don't know what was going on, but like we're like we're going to have sex.
So from his front door, you can see like you if you're like standing at the front door and like,

you know how there's like little windows on the side of the door. Like if you peered in,

you could see into the living room like on the TV. But like no one's like coming up to your door,

like whatever. We had this really weird phase where like every time we were having sex,

someone would ring the doorbell like at my apartment, like we had ordered something. And I'm'm always like, oh my God, did they like hear us outside? But like, whatever.
So we're sitting on the couch. We're having sex.
Craig's like, oh, let's watch porn. But he puts it on the TV.
Because you're in the living room. Because we're in the living room.
And we just bought a framed TV. So why would we not use it so porn's happening on the tv we're having sex doorbell rings his front door we both look at each other like stop for a second and i'm like they'll go away like who it doesn't matter like they'll go away craig's like oh my god no like it's definitely someone we stop he turns He turns it off.
The person had like walked away

and Craig was like too scared to go to the front door.

So he brings up his like ring camera.

It's a little fucking kid selling candy.

Craig for three days was scared

that his parents were going to come to the house

and be like, what the fuck?

My kid saw this on the TV.

It was a Jehovah's Witness.

And they were like, these people need to be saved immediately.

No, this is so dramatizing.

I'm like, you probably got nervous and read why.

Wait, my favorite story that you know, we're just exposing things,

but we're just tired.

So this is what happens.

When they were filming a show and there was a dildo out can you tell them that oh my god okay so one time no this is so raunchy but it's so funny it's so bad mom turn this It's like so, it's not for moms. None of you can stay, but moms.
So when you film Southern Charm, like, they're in your house. Like, they're all over.
Like, I almost feel like they want to show people, like, look how fucked up they are. Like, look how messy this is.
And like, this room is disgusting. So we're in the living room.
We're filming Southern Charm. I'm looking at Craig.
I glance down at the ground. There's a literal dildo under the table.
I'm freaking out inside. I'm like if I can't call any attention because the camera people are going to go right to it then it's going to be on the show.
Then we're going to look like, I'm going to look like an absolute whore. Because obviously, like...
It's all those moments where you're like, am I going to save it? Like, what do you do? Yeah, like, I was like, should I kick it more under the table? You should have, like, chucked your body onto it. You, like, couldn't see it.
But, like, from the angle I'm sitting on the couch, like, I'm... It's staring directly at me.
Oh, so you don't know if they see it and they're just now acknowledging it oh my god that's tricky tricky tricky but they didn't see it and then and we moved it but it was so I was so scared I was like if that makes it on national television I'll kill myself because remember the first episode ever of summer house not the first episode but like the first season they were like Hannah like like tell page you want to buy a vibrator yeah and you were like stop no i didn't even have a vibrator yeah that's before i got you one my favorite thing is not necessarily using vibrators but giving it to people yeah but i it's such an awkward thing that you love i think it's Also, I am trying to summer in the Hamptons. So in the city, summer in the Hamptons, you have to like just put a bunch of shit in your bag and be like, let's bring this out to my new life in the Hamptons.
And like keep it there. And keep it there.
So in the beginning of the summer, I was like grabbing shit. And I have so many vibrators, especially because people send it to me.
me and then they're never charged and like I'm really bad with vibrator admin but I have them lying around and I'm like okay I definitely should bring one I will say vibrator admin you don't have to charge it as often it's funny though it holds a charge but mine are never charged and And like You're not gonna wait Six minutes No For like the moment's over It's over So I need to work on that Within myself Have you ever been somewhere And you have to go like Old school Like just your finger Yeah I mean most of the time Oh see Now I like can never go back I know Then I'm not doing it It's like I think I'll order room services Wait that makes me so happy for you But yeah it's a lot of charging I'm like, then I'm not doing it. It's like, I think I'll order room services.

Wait, that makes me so happy for you.

But yeah, it's a lot of charging. I'm like, what am I Amish? This is ridiculous.

Give me some fucking electricity

here.

But there's

something, like, you almost feel spoiled

with the vibrator. Yeah.

I'm like, oh my god, I've over

sexualized myself. Like, I can't

feel normal. Yeah, like, I don't want to lose

that being able to get

Thank you. with the vibrator.
Yeah. Like, it shouldn't feel that good.
I'm like, oh my God, I've over-sexualized myself. Like, I can't feel normal.
Yeah, like, I don't want to lose that being able to get there with my hands. Yeah.
Anyway. Just took a turn.
So I, for, my backpack is just, like, it accumulates a lot of weird stuff. And you know when you put something and you're like, I'm going to need this.
And then you just have, like, 20 things you've never used in your backpack. So I've been traveling a lot more than I wanted to this summer.

And I haven't been in the Hamptons as much.

L.A., whatever.

Recently, I look in my backpack.

At the bottom of my backpack is a long vibrator that's just been sitting at the bottom. And you've just been going through TSA for months.

I've been going through every TSA for months.

And they definitely see.

100%. No.
100%.

No, 100%.

And I'm annoyed because I'm like, I wasn't even using it.

Yeah.

Like, I didn't even know it was there.

We're so funny because we were like, let's do a fun episode where the Gigglers ask us questions.

But we've just been straight up talking for 25 minutes.

Something fishy is going on.

Have you ever seen, oh, you can buy tickets to the Olympics?

No.

Who's in the crowd? Who's there? Maybe, like, they just let Paris people or French people. It's been in America, though.
Have you ever heard of, like, oh, tickets for the Olympics gymnastics finals are, like, on sale? No. The problem is, like, I never have ever gotten tickets to anything.
No, but, like, I've never even heard, like, oh tickets to. Like not even a Groupon.
No, not even like a brand giveaway. Like, so I'm something.
Who is in the crowd? Yeah. I'm on to them.
Okay, cool. So I don't know what it is.
Well, I know Ralph Lauren sent some people. Like influencers? Yeah.
And I feel like at least you should have been sent. Yeah but like did they

go to events?

Yeah. Oh they did.
And they like Emma

Chamberlain. And it's always like oh the Olympics

like a bunch of like Olympians parents

couldn't get tickets to like see

I'm like so then who's getting

the tickets? There's only one Snoop Dogg.

They're in massive arenas.

Yeah. Doesn't make

any sense to me. I love your conspirial thinking right now.
Yeah, my investigative work. Okay, so the Gigglers asked us questions.
What do we wear to the Giggly Squad show to impress you guys? Actually, I've been getting some, like, what's the vibe for Club Giggly. It's whatever your going out vibe is.
So if you're a girl that wears, like, jeans and a pair of heels and, like, a heels and a tee, love it. If you're a girl that's like, oh, but I love a knee-high boot and a miniskirt, absolutely pop off.
It's whatever you feel confident in and also know that we all have the same personality. Anyone who listens to Giggly Squad, us.
So if you wear a tie, people are going to love it. If you wear a wear a tie, people are going to love it.

If you wear a slick back bun,

people are going to love it.

Yeah.

So like lean into.

So it's like what you would wear if you were going out to dinner

with all of your girlfriends

for one of your girlfriend's birthdays.

Yes.

Yes.

I'm obsessed.

Like you don't have to go like

full club mini dress.

You can wear jeans,

but like you want to be looking

like you're

going out for the night.

I agree.

French fries

or mozzarella sticks?

For the rest of my life.

Just, like, in general.

French fries, I think.

I have to go with

French fries, too.

And, like, we're not trying to,

like, turn on our Italian heritage.

No.

Just mozzarella sticks?

The Irish went through a famine. Have some fucking respect.
The potato famine of 1847. I can't feel good about myself eating a mozzarella stick.
French fries, I'm like, it's potato. Like, I'm saying like that.
I have, okay, here's one thing that I have that I don't think I've ever said. I have an irrational fear of choking on a mozzarella stick on anything.
But like living by myself, I think, honestly, that Sex and the City episode where Miranda almost choked and died and got eaten by her cat, like really scarred me. So like I get really nervous when I'm like home by myself, like eating because like there are multiple times where I've been like over three times a day.
You're like, this is where we go. No, when it's something like chewy or like or something gets like stuck in my throat.
I'm like, oh, my God, I got to like I grab my phone. Literally.
And I don't even think 911. I'm like, I got to call my mom.
Like she'll know what to do. That's so funny because I eat like I'm trying to kill myself.
Like I eat like I want it. So mozzarella sticks, if I'm by myself in my apartment, I'm a tad weary.
I don't chew enough. Do you ever like swallow something and you're like, that should have been chewed? Like, I just...
Honestly, not since I was seven. I guzzle my food and then I'm like, why do I have a stomachache all the time And people are like you eat too fast And I'm like well I've been eating like this forever Like my stomach should figure it out by now You do eat quickly Like there have been multiple times where We've like put a plate down on the table I've turned for five seconds She's gone And I'm like you ate all of that No it's not healthy, but then like, I don't have the...
Because I think you legitimately, you are, I feel like someone that legit does only eat when you're hungry, but you wait. You're like, and now I'm starving.
And then I'm like, I need that in my fucking body as soon as possible. Like, you don't mindless eat.
Like, you don't snack, I don't feel like. I literally never snack.
I only snack if I like can't get a full meal and I need something. Or if you're somewhere and you're bored, you're like, okay, fine.
Honestly, like never bored snack. Yeah, you don't.
But I like fucking eat my meals. Like I look forward to a meal.
You're a breakfast, lunch, dinner girly. And I just don't have the patience to chew.
I think like life is too short chew. But, okay, speaking of choking, Andrew Collin, shout out Andrew Collin, has the funniest choking story because he has anxiety, as we all do.
And he once told me a story where he thought he was choking to death. So he drove himself to the hospital thinking he was choking to death.
He was breathing. Clearly he was breathing.
And he's like, he got there and was like, I think I'm choking to death. And they're like, you would have been dead.
You're talking to us, sir. The way he tells the story is so much better.
What was he eating? I think he was like choking. A mozzarella stick.
No, like I think it was his own saliva. Like I think he was like, I think I'm choking to death in this slow choking to death thing.
And they were like, there's, you would have been choked. I actually multiple times have wanted to order like the thing for babies when you're choking.
Like the little air thing you stick in their throat and it like sucks it up. Yeah.
I think I might. Honestly.
You never know. I should have more of a fear of choking and maybe that will make me chew more.
But like, you can deep throat a lot. Yeah.
No, that's true. You know what's funny is like, and when I brush my teeth, gag.
Brush my teeth, gag. Giving heads.
That's realistic, right? I'm in the Olympics. Wait, why do I feel like I've been gagging more with my toothbrush? It's anxiety.
Wait, how do you know that? Because I know when my anxiety started how old I was and that was my first thing that started. Do you remember once I puked and you were like, I was driving? You had anxiety.
And it was anxiety. Yeah.
And you were like, welcome to my life. Because my anxiety is like physical.
Yeah. Like my body will literally shut down.
so i know like the anxious stuff for like the physical stuff where i don't have as like i don't ever really suffer from even though panic attacks are physical i don't suffer from like certain stuff like that okay let's play a fun game who do you think is more anxious and who do you think is more depressed? I feel like I'm definitely more anxious and you're more depressed. Period.
Period. But we could switch off.
Like Mercury is in retrograde sometimes and we switch off. Yeah.
Here's the thing. I don't know when I'm depressed genuinely until I'm out of it.
And I'm like, that was a weird week. I'm like, I didn't pee for four days.
Something was going on there. Like, I feel like my body, like, is like, we're not, don't deal with it.
You can't deal with it right now. We'll let you know later.
And it's definitely a mix. But, yeah, I'm, sometimes I'm like, whoa, you're so sad for no reason.
No, this is so sad. But this last week, I was like fine.
But then at night, the second my head would hit the pillow, I would think about how everyone in my life is going to die. Oh, my God.
Why would I have to? It wasn't even like 3 a.m. It's like the second my head hit the pillow, I was like, who's going to die? See, I feel like and mine is like, how are they die oh you know how can I prevent that no my thing is just yeah I'll get really like one day I'm like I'm I'm taking over the world I love I feel like I have a purpose I like love living and then the next day I'll be like none of us have a reason to be here why are we even here no for the past couple of months I've been really obsessed with like being telling my mom not to die to the point where she was like I think you need to talk about it with someone because you're obsessed with death and I'm like I'm not obsessed with that I just have to make sure you're not ever going anywhere all these other people get them out I go but I'm not letting you go no and she was like you're gonna be fine me.
You're already better than I was at your age. Like, you know everything that I wanted to teach you.
You're fine. And I was like, don't say that.
Yeah, I'll cry right now. No.
And then I kept having dreams about my grandpa. Which is like, I didn't even ask for that.
And he's in all my dreams. But that's him coming to you.
That should be comforting for you. But he doesn't say anything.
Oh, well. You probably say enough for the both of you.
He's probably like, I can't get a fucking word in, Hannah. I'm trying to come to you and comfort you.
So you know what's so funny? The Gigglers send us so many light, fun questions. And we're like, let's talk about who's going to die.
Death, anxiety, and depression, and dildos. Oh, God.
Depression and d and depression and that's the name of this we got the name of the okay um support for today's episode comes from honey love honey love has revolutionized the wireless bra game and especially in the summer when you want to wear something light that isn't like pushing into you their bras feature supportive bonding that eliminates the need for uncomfortable wires and unnecessary bulk. It's super lightweight and comfortable without sacrificing support.
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Everyone knows I have an emotional support water bottle. I even bring it out on stage when we're doing Giggly Squad live, but if I'm going to be drinking that much water, why don't I amp it up a little with liquid IV hannah's got me into putting things in my water bottle I never used to do it before but she's really upped my water game liquid iv has so many flavors to explore like their zesty new hydration multiplier it's sugar-free raspberry lemonade and it's so good they have a bunch of true to fruit flavors that keep you hydrated they have berry, lemon lime, and pina colada.
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That's amazon.com slash ad-free podcasts to catch up on the latest episodes without the ads. How do I tell my boyfriend that it's okay that he can't grow a mustache and to stop trying? That's when like, look, life is a comedy.
He needs to stop taking himself so seriously. Be like, look, the peach fuzz look.
It's not it. Honestly, sometimes when it comes to like men's appearance, I think because they think like we don't know or like we're trying to change whatever.
I think you might have to get like one of his guy friends to be like, bro, come on. Oh, yeah.
Because they'll be like, you don't get it. It's like a playoff beard.
You don't get it. Yeah.
And so I think you have to like call in reinforcements and trick him. This is my thing about mustaches.
No guy ever looks better with a mustache. It's more of them like trying to be interesting or like overcompensating for something.
Like he's going through something. It's like a girl's bangs is guy's mustaches.
Or just take the approach I do and tell them that it's, you look stupid. And if I don't tell you, who's going to tell you? I'm your number one partner.
I'm your number one fan. I'm looking out for the

good of the both of us. If I

was trying to grow a mustache,

it would be easy.

From a timeline, be like, okay, let's play a game.

If you can get a mustache by

the end of the month, great.

And if you can't, you lose.

Shake on it. Goodbye.

That's hard

though. I just break up with them.

I just break up with them. It was the mustache.
I gotta go. Oh, my God.
This is a good question. Paige, if you could style any celebrity, who would it be? Taylor Swift.
Okay, so. That was so quick.
But, because she has. She has the body.
So much potential. She's so tall.
And she's just, she literally gives model. She would look good in anything.
I want to see her in more like street style Zendaya looks. She would absolutely fucking crush in Zendaya's like red carpet style.
But honestly. No, I think Taylor Swift dresses a little bit kooky.
because she wants to remain relatable. Because what other billionaire do you know that's relatable? OK, sorry.
It's 930 in the morning. I also love the idea of like she's working so hard, but it's like as a billionaire, she still has a stylist.
Right. She still has a stylist.

She's not picking out her stuff to go to dinner with Blake Lively where there's like paparazzi. Like that was styled.
Also, there's rumors going around because Ryan Reynolds said no notes on a pod. And then he said we write at dawn in another interview.
And then someone slid into my DM saying that they can't tell me how they know but they know that he listens to Giggly Squad. Ryan Reynolds? Well, they said that he just like loves comedy.
Wait, that's so funny because I was just invited to Blake Lively's red carpet for her movie but I was like, sorry, got a cat I have to stay home I also want Blake Lively to go more street style I want her to dress like Jennifer Lawrence the row yes this is the thing about Blake she loves a pattern she loves a color she loves a fringe it's giving California Yeah, She loves a pattern. She loves a color.
She loves a fringe. She loves tinsel.
Yeah, she loves, her and Taylor, they love that stuff. And me and her want, me and you want them to be more like depressed New York.
Yeah, I think that's what it is. I think like when we see.
Her style is very happy. Very happy.
And I'm like, but what if you wore all black? Yeah. And you did like a slick back bun.
Yeah. Let's just.
Can I just say one thing? I tried slick back buns for like a second. Does it not give everyone a headache? Also, don't you feel very exposed? Like I wear my hair down because I feel like I could like hide myself.
That is such a niche girl thing that we don't talk about enough. Like when I go to an airport, I never do a slick back bun because I'm like, I'm too exposed.
I'm like, you could see every fucking angle of my face when you do a slick back bun. I'm like, I have to put my hair down and put a hat on.
Like this is, I need alone time. I saw a thing recently because Craig's always like, New York City's inhabitable.
Like he hates it. And so I saw a thing that it was like New York New Yorkers are the politest, rudest people.
Yeah. People don't look at each other on the subway because they're so close to each other in such close quarters.
And they're being polite. There's so many people.
So they're literally giving you your own space by not making eye contact with you. it's like we're sardines in a can everywhere wait that is so because yeah per capita yeah the population's insane so if everyone was looking over and breaking people's privacy imagine getting on the subway and everyone's saying hi it's like no no it's too much so new New Yorkers are actually like giving you your space and being respectful but it gets the rap of like they're so rude like they never say hi and it's like no because we're so close to each other all the time but that's why like in new york when something happens in the street people like rush to help yes because like it is a very community type place.
A thousand percent. Also, you never leave an experience in New York wondering, like,

what just happened, like how that person felt.

Like, you know, sometimes not in New York, you have a weird exchange and then you're like, did they?

Were they being a dick?

Yeah.

We're like New York, you know, if they're being a dick.

Oh, my God.

We had the funniest on like 34th Street.

Do you remember we were leaving?

Yeah.

OK, I never put up the middle finger. I literally never do it.
I really stay above the drama most of the time. But basically, you know when there's a car by the crosswalk and he was trying to like.
He didn't make it through. He didn't make it through.
And then he was trying to like go and we were trying to walk and he was trying to move in front of us even though there's cars in front of him. He would have been like in the middle

of the crosswalk. There's nowhere for him

to go. Yeah.
But he also was just trying to get

in front of us. So I kind of gave

him a look. I'll give looks.
Yeah you do

you'll throw a look. I'll throw a look and the look

was like bro where are you gonna go?

Yeah. For two feet?

And he was getting all worked up

Did he give you the finger? So I look over

and he's giving me the finger. Oh he was? Yeah he was giving me the finger.
Oh? so I look over and he's giving me the finger oh he was? he was giving us the finger I trailed behind you in grace so I look at him and he's looking at me and he's giving me the finger and I think you could tell that I was like kidding? like laughing? and I also like you can tell when someone's used to giving the finger verse I was think he was. You were a finger virgin.
Yeah. Like I could tell that he was like this is amateur hour finger.
Yeah. So I like threw up my little nub and he looked at me and I look at him and we're both holding the finger to each other and he starts laughing.
He was like this six year old like Albanian man and I'm giggling and we're both giving each other the finger. And that's New York City.
And we literally left that bonded.

No.

I said, I have a bestie.

New York is the best for that type of stuff.

Because I was like, bro, if you're going to give me the finger.

And I think I also think I gave the finger because I was with you guys.

Like if I was alone, I would have been like, I'm not getting involved.

But I felt like I had to protect you guys in that moment.

So I said, I'm not letting you bully us right now.

And then he left.

These are my friends and we're trying to walk across the street.

We literally have important things to do.

Okay, next question.

What makeup are you obsessed with right now?

Wait, this is a great, we're all about segues.

This is a great segue to talk about what actually happened at Ulta the other day.

Yes.

Because it is kind of crazy.

Well, influencers and like lip readers. By the way, in my next life, I want to be a lip reader.
Me too. Saw us in the background of the Lipstick Lesbians video.
Yes. And they were like, there's drama.
What are they talking about? There's heat. There's passion.
That is how we speak. When we're happy.
About literally anything specifically we were talking about the new lancome hypnostrama mascara and their lip idol the butter glow we literally were just complimenting each other i think it's very new york italian to like compliment each other but seem like i'm yelling at you and like we talk with our hands we're passionate about each other's faces so like when your face looks good with like a certain lip balm I'm obviously going to cause some drama no you literally treat me differently when I put some effort into my looks you're like wait do you want to like hang out should we get coffee after this you're gorgeous so yeah there was no drama I mean the drama was that we were enjoying putting makeup on our faces have you ever been to an Ulta yeah like when you're at those counters and it's just like right there it's so easy to try stuff so I was like trying this mascara I love being a hype girl like that's my like first purpose in life yeah so like I give credit where credit is due. If the Lip Idol Butter Glow is glowing on your lips, I'm going to tell you.

Right. like that's my like first purpose in life.
Yeah. So like I give credit where credit is due.

If the Lip Idol Butter Glow is glowing on your lips,

I'm going to tell you.

Right.

And if you're going to spend your money on something,

I want it to be something that's worth it.

That's so true.

So there really was not any drama happening.

We were just being obsessed with each other,

trying out lip glosses and mascaras.

We're just girls.

And I feel like when guys talk, well, guys never talk about anything're just girls. And I feel like when guys talk,

well, guys never talk about anything important. No.
And I feel like they never look at each other.

Guys, I feel like we'll never compliment each other's facial features.

Where I feel like girls were like, your eyebrows are perfect.

No, imagine a guy going up to another guy and be like, well, what chapstick do you use?

Hey, is that Lip Idol by Lancome? Bro, can I borrow some of your Hypnose Drama mascara? Oh yeah, I just got a new tube. Met a guy online recently.
He referred to women as breeders. What's your take? Is he like being funny? Yeah, but that's even worse.
I'd rather him be serious than be trying to be funny and say breeder. Yeah, like, oh, what are you, just like a bunch of breeders.

Also, I think talking about, like, children, having children on a dating app is like, we haven't even met yet, sir.

I want to, like, reverse the roles.

You know how the joke, like, NBA players, like, how girls are trying to get pregnant with their babies?

Like, I want a story of, like, a famous woman that, like, men keep trying to impregnate her. That's terrifying.
That's one of the scariest things I've ever heard in my life. Because I was talking about how I've never been single on the road and how, like, male comics, if they're really famous, like...
I wish I could go back in my dating apps and like read what I would say to people. Just so that we had it for context for Giggly.
I really took pride in my flirting game. I was the friend who was like, I'm good at pretending I'm someone I'm not.
Yeah. Or just like, I'm good at the like lack of intimacy, funny, fuck around type shit.
The second feelings got involved, I was like, I'm confused. I don't know what's going on.
Like I flirted too much. Yes.
Like I owe you a relationship, but I can't. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
But it's also a lot of advice I'd give with flirting is just like keep it short. Yeah.
Like I say short and uninterested. Yes.
And they're like all fucking over it. All you have have to do Say short and uninterested Because if you're actually like Having deep conversations with people over text Then you're sitting with them And you have nothing to fucking talk about Because men inherently I mean women do too I also like the thrill of like a chase Like in the very beginning But I think men like it a little bit more And so I think think that truly is the key.
Like, I'm good. This was just going to be something fun.
I don't really care that much. Yeah, I think you'll see a lot of relationships with like girls who look a little exasperated with their dude.
And I don't think it's a coincidence. It's because like, you don't you want to be so comfortable and not need him.
And that's where the healthiest relationships happen. Yeah.

And like, yeah, you don't need anyone. Yeah.
Like I just genuinely want you around. Exactly.
What was the hardest part about writing the book? Writing the book. Writing it.
That's where I do think it was us. like we're it was actually easy to come up with ideas and like come up with yeah funny concepts but the actual like putting sentences together was a hard part I think also like like certain stories we told like how did we feel about it when it happened versus now like writing about it when you're like I don't feel that same way but trying to like convey what you felt at the time when you don't feel like that anymore the one cool thing is while we were writing it I was having my like panic attack about my special so I was able to go in and like add to the anxiety chapter and be like hey guys we're we're right in the moment we're live yeah.
Yeah, no, literally we're live. We're on the ground floor right now.
So yeah, it was hard to kind of go back to how we felt about certain situations. Do you brush your teeth with cold or hot water? Cold.
Cold. I'm not absolute psychos.
There was a girl in my high school that brushed her teeth with hot water and she said it was because she was Jewish, but I think she was lying to me. But I didn't know.
So I was like, oh, okay. Like that must be a thing that they do.
And I never forgot about it. How often do we text honestly daily? Yeah.
Well, we have our group chat, me, you, and Grace, which is pretty much every day. Yeah.
And then we do sidebar for some things. And I would say every other day we're sidebarring about something.
Yeah. The thing is we also consciously don't tell each other everything because Giggly Squad is important to us.
Like I'll have stuff happen and I'll be like, and then we write it in the – Yeah. Let's say we're writing the Giggly Squad notes every day.
We also go in waves. Unless it's like something huge.
True. Then it's like a voice note.
We do get into – We can't leave a paper trail. This is the thing.
When we do get into it, like we'll voice note for like six hours. And I think sometimes out of respect for each other, we're like, let's give her a break today.
I know I feel like that. I'll be like, she doesn't need...
No, we couldn't be more low maintenance. And like, like if you said, I'm not going to talk to you for two months because I feel like you just need some time, I'd be like, okay.
But it's also like, you know the senses. Like I can tell when you're overwhelmed.
Yeah. And I'll send a text like, you good like no and then I go honestly she knows I'm here she knows I'm here when you send that that's when I know like I haven't been living my truth you know what I mean when you're like are you okay because I know in your head you're like you have a list of 10 things that like would fix whatever my problem is but I'm not in that mindset to hear it so you're like it's okay just go at your own and I don't want you to feel alone but I also don't want to overstep right and try to like solve anything yeah oh gosh no when I get a text message from you and then I have another one from my mom and it's basically the same thing.
I'm like, I'm really fucking my life up because you're both will be like, are you OK? Is everything good? Oh, God. Ever wonder what those pimple patches are that you see all over Instagram and TikTok? SZA's wearing them.
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It's just so freaking adorable. Okay so I picked a bunch of flats, a bunch of fun of fun heels and a bunch of sneakers I tried to do an equal amount because I know that there are a lot of Hannah's and I know that there are a lot of pages also I mean did you see the gifting how freaking cute were all of those little boxes I was obsessed with them I loved the gold flats because I just feel like I've been wearing flats so much with like, honestly, with like sweatpants, jeans, capris.
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Who would play you both in a Giggly Cult biopic? Oh my god, that's such a good question. Daisy Edgar-Jones, I think, would play you.
Oh my god, I kind of love that. I feel like Mila Kunis should play you.
I know, but I feel like she's like older now. Oh.
No, I mean. I mean, like to go next to Daisy Edgar Jones.
Yeah, I guess. You know who could play you if you want to be young? Sorry.
What's her name? The girl who was Wednesday. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like if they gave her more of a cat eye. Speaking of, the other day Craig said I gave Wednesday energy.
Amazing. And I thought he meant like the day of the week.
And I was like, that's so fucking rude. I give the middle of the week hump day energy.
You're trying to get through it. That's like the meanest thing I've ever heard in my life.
And I think he did mean that. And then he said, no, no, no.
I meant like Wednesday Adams, but I'm not completely sure. And then I had a thought.
Put that in the back. Is that a weird baby name? Wednesday? Yeah.
Yeah. It's too on the nose of the character.
Because I was just like, oh, could that be a cool baby name? Are you? But I don't like the nickname Wendy. No.
Are you going to name your kid a weird celebrity name? I feel like you are. Half and half.
One will be weird. One won't be.
No, like my celebrity weird name is really like a play off my grandma's name. Yes.
But like people will think it's weird, but it's not. And I've had it planned.
And it's not like Apple school. Yeah, it's not Apple.
No. People are very strict about not telling people what your baby name is because everyone's going to judge it.
OK, not to bring up the pregnant community because I support them. It's so crazy now that I feel like asking people like, oh, do you know what you're having is like a rude question now? Because the amount of times that I like the answer is I know, but we're not telling people and I'm like, OK, sorry.
Like, I'm like, OK, I want sometimes I want to turn and be like, I don't actually give a flying fuck. How many pregnant women are you running honestly a lot like lately because i'm like i wasn't trying to offend you i was literally just being nice and then you gave me the weirdest answer back and i'm like okay and then you're like can i guess can i guess and some people i've just never been in the camp of like i want to be surprised because I feel like popping a baby out of your pussy is the fucking surprise like I've never done that before and that's gonna be frightening so like the gender I might need to know a few things also how are you shopping bitch how the you're putting all yellow and green I need pink bows I need blue r blue ruffles.
Like, I'm done with that. I'm so done with that.
Sorry. Okay.
Wait. I love when you get passionate about things that are.
It's just like, I'm like, oh. Watch you be like.
We're not telling. We're actually not telling.
Are you going to do a gender reveal? Probably, but probably just for my family and you and Grace. Why do I really want to do a golf gender reveal? You hit a bunch of golf balls and it goes into powder.
It hits a golf ball and it goes into powder. Yeah.
It's so waspy of you. Oh my God, no, it is so waspy.
Are we going to do it in Connecticut? Oh, I think we should all be on a golf course. When's the two time? I was going to cut a freaking cake.
Or I serve a tennis ball. That would be two on the nose.
That would be cute. That would be cute.
Oh gosh. This is actually the best question I've ever gotten.
Some of these questions are gold. Okay.
If we were both kidnapped

together, who would they kill

first? For sure

me. 100% Hannah because she's

vocal. She's

pointing out where they messed

up, who's coming to get

them. I've been paralyzed

with fear. You're going to fall asleep

because it would be so stressed out. Yeah, I would have my narcolepsy.

Paige, I think, is actually less impulsive than me in when the stakes get high. Yeah.
I'm also more of a doer. Yeah, I'm a freezer.
You're a freezer. I'm like, let me, I need to assess this situation.
Sometimes I do think I could, and I also feel like I'd try to be a hero. Like, I'd be like, I got this.
I'll, I know what to do. Yeah, you wouldn't.
And it would backfire. I would be like, please don't see that to me.
I'd be like, look, I've been thinking about this. I would be plotting in my head.
I think more of like, how could we, could we get out of this window? Like, how could we? Here's the thing. If I was being kidnapped, I, I feel like I'd be like, look, I'm not going with you to the second place.
So just shoot me here. Just kill me right here because I can't do the second part.
I will say that they would, if they were going to keep one of us alive, it would be you. Because they'd be like, that one's sweating.
This one's not sweating at all, and it's like 110 degrees.

This one we could fold up.

In this locker room.

This one's not flexible.

Her hair is very greasy.

She's giving a stench.

No.

You would pretty privilege your way where they'd be like, we need that one.

I'd trick them into like, I'd be in love with them.

You'd be like, what if we just dated? like what if we just dated you'd flirt your way i'd flirt my way out he'd be looking at me and i'd be like i'm gonna kill you and then you look and he'd be like he's paying you would i fuck him yeah i would try and pull out whatever i could crazy. That's so terrifying.

Sorry.

That one was the bad thought?

No.

After all the things we talked about?

You know what I will say, though, about kidnapping,

which I feel like we should say for the girlies

because we don't drive,

like we don't go to parking lots ever,

that there's like this whole epidemic

of people putting like air tags on your car and then putting stuff on like your handle so that like when you grab your handle, it's like some type of like chloroform basically and you literally just pass out and then that's how they take you. Where did you hear that? I read it on TikTok.
So we know. We know what's happening.
Because something happened to this girl in Walmart and these guys pretended to work at Walmart. They were like, you have to go out to your car.
And she was just like, no. And then one of the Walmart associates was like, they've been handing girls notes in like grocery stores and department stores and they're opening the notes and whatever fumes are like making them loopy.
So then when they walk out to stores, and they're opening the notes, and whatever fumes are, like, making them loopy.

So then when they walk out to their cars,

they're, like, kind of don't know what's going on,

and then they take that.

Never take anything from a man,

and if you don't have your driver's license, it's okay.

Honestly, what a time to not have your driver's license.

What a time to be alive.

What a time to be alive.

What's Daphne's middle name?

She doesn't have one.

She's, like, Cher. Yeah.
She's just Daphne. But she's Daphne.
But I keep saying Daphne Reynolds, but I don't know who that is. I don't think it's...
Debbie Reynolds. Is that where I'm getting it? She's like an old star, Hollywood star.
I don't know why I keep just being like, Daphne Reynolds. Do you ever call her Dee Dee? I don't.
I do yell, because there's like a line from Bridgerton, like the opening line of Bridgerton is, Daphne, you must make haste. And I yell it all the time in my apartment when I can't find her.
Wait, how is she doing? She's perfect. She's amazing.
She's gorgeous. Well, you posted a photo of she loves looking at herself in the mirror.
That's it. Can you take a photo every time she does it? Because it really makes my day.
I try. the other day she just sat in front of like the one in my bedroom and just stared at herself and I'm like never seen beauty like this before um freaky friday edition if you were in my body for the day what would you do shave my legs I would shave my leg I would take an all-girl shower that's the first do.
Well, that's the day that would take 24 hours to get all the hair out. I would take an all-girl shower.
I would get a blowout. And have sex with Des.
Oh! Oh, my God. Okay, if I was you, I would yell at Craig on FaceTime.

Yeah, that's a fun one.

I would confuse Craig on FaceTime.

I'd make him think I'm mad at him.

You'd be like, this is a different personality.

I haven't met this one yet.

And then, honestly, I would do a photo shoot.

I'd want to feel the energy of what it's like to be you on set.

Where it's just like every angle's hitting. And everyone like i'm really not every angle isn't always hitting what angle doesn't hit for you honestly like my left side sometimes like my smile is like fucked like my teeth look fucked up so like i can't if i'm on my left side i'm not showing teeth i love that for you thank you but on my right side I'll give it smile at teeth very not on my left that's so I always feel like who is that one person um not Demi Moore Demi Lovato when they said she had like an evil twin was her in pictures there was one photo that was not okay yeah sometimes there is a monster side for me i've realized like if i put my head too low like if i put my chin down my forehead gets huge and then if i put my face too up then like it gives too much neck then the problem is when you're getting photos taken you don't always know where they're gonna be like their angle yeah so it's really a fucking crap in these streets it's fucking hard okay we have time for one more how do you fall asleep at night like what's your go-to when you're having trouble okay you know what I've been doing recently that I never used to do? I used to just, like, put my phone down, turn on the TV, and watch it until, like, I fell asleep.
Now I've been turning my TV off, obviously turning all my lights off. Raw dogging.
And just, like, closing my eyes. And when I feel— She goes, this is crazy.
Close your eyes. That one will help will help no but when I close my eyes I only think about my breathing like I think about military no like I think about like like okay I'm breathing I'm breathing in it's going to like cell in my body this is yours.
It also I think is like a little bit meditative. Yeah.

One thing I realized, I'm really good at napping and I'm not that good at falling

asleep at night. Yeah.
But I realized when I'm

napping, I like get really excited

about the idea of like letting my body go

limp and just like being

exhausted where sometimes at night you just keep

trying to find a comfortable position. So I try to just

like go limp

and like

lie to myself that I'm enjoying

the like, yeah, like

Thank you. keep trying to find a comfortable position so I try to just like go limp and like lie to myself that I'm enjoying the like yeah like pretend I'm about to go for a nap in the middle of the day when I'm supposed to be doing meetings so you kind of trick yourself I've realized like on nights that I can't fall asleep it's genuinely because I haven't had enough alone time with myself like I can't I've never suffered from like to wake up early and I like, I got to go to sleep.
Like when I turn the lights off and I like, I'm like, I got to go to sleep. I can do it.
But on the nights that I'm like keeping my light on or I'm staying on TikTok, I've realized it's because I haven't spent enough alone time with myself during the day. You're like making up for a long time.
So I feel like I'm like, I'm not, I don't want the night to be over yet. I do also

think like, if you

can go on like a hot girl walk or some kind

of exercise, it does help because I'll

get fucking, it's not. Well, you take

a shower a lot and I feel like that relaxes

your body. Yeah, taking a hot shower

at night, put me right to sleep.

I do have this one thing that I used to do

all the fucking time in college. I don't know

why, probably because I like drank so much.

But I would take these detox Thank you. at night.
Put me right to sleep. I do have this one thing that I used to do all the fucking time in college.
I don't know

why. Probably because I like drank so much.

But I would take these detox

baths like at night

time. They'll put you right

the fuck to sleep. What do you put in the bath?

Do the bath as hot as you can stand it.

So like guys can't do it.

No they literally can't. They would burn.

Do it as hot as you can stand it.

Equal parts Epsom salt.

Equal parts

baking soda. Sitting there for like

Thank you. No, they literally can't.
They would burn. Do it as hot as you can stand it.
Equal parts Epsom salt, equal parts baking soda. Sitting there for like 10, 15 minutes.
Let the bread rise. Don't pass out, you fucking idiot.
Like drink enough water so you don't pass out. But right when you get out of the tub, you can't do anything.
So like don't think you're going to get out of the tub and like do a task. You literally will lay down.
I've like laid down in my towel, fallen asleep for the whole night. What does it do to you, the baking soda? It's supposed to like detox your pores, like draw like toxins out, which like I don't know.
Yeah. I'm not the actual doctor.
Someone also said if you're having trouble going to sleep to imagine your house that you grew up in and do like a full tour in your head like walking in and going into every room and like by the end you'll fall asleep but i tried it it didn't work that's traumatizing i think and sad so sad i mourn my childhood all the time and have no the fuck i would not do that to fall asleep i just want to go back it was so much easier I want my limited two camping bag put me on the face of the magazine well you guys we love you so much thank you for giggling um also we sold out of the merch oh my god yeah um I think we're gonna start doing like a monthly limited drop of just just like funny sayings. That we're saying during the time.
Because you guys will be like, make this. And we'll do it.
And I'm really excited about that. We have some tickets left.
I actually want to say the cities that there's still tickets available. Because I've been just being very general.
These are where the most tickets are available. Atlantic City.
Let's go. Hard Rock Live.
That's going to be be a party Newark, we added another show in Newark

We added another show in Madison

Badgers, let's go

Chicago, Illinois

Wait, this didn't be my first time in

Madison, Wisconsin

Honestly, like the Midwest

I feel like, other than

I've really only ever been to Chicago

It's gonna be fun, you're gonna love the Midwest

But Chicago, we added another show

At the Chicago Theater, Chicago

Thank you. I feel like other than I've really only ever been to Chicago.
It's gonna be fun. You're gonna love the Midwest But Chicago we added another show at the Chicago theater Chicago San Antonio, Texas We have a couple tickets left Austin.
We added another show Orlando. We added another show This is impossible to say mash and tuck it Foxwoods resort.
That's gonna be lit mash and tuck Let's go. Cleveland, Ohio.
We added another show and we added Windsor and we will be dropping another show for the New York City girlies. Keep an eye out.
Love you guys. Bye.
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