Patreon Preview #325: Dinosaucers! (and other stuff) w/ Thomas Sanders

Well, Thomas, thank you for coming back.

You're going to be doing another in your series.

Thank you for having me back.

This is, I think, my fourth appearance, and I can't wait for the next one where I join the Five Timers Club and I get my robe.

Yes, we're just like SNL in that we'll have a very nice robe.

It's less of a robe and more like a rash that everyone gets after being here five times.

It's sort of like a disease.

The robe gives you the rash we'll talk we'll talk later we'll talk offline yeah but i'm i'm yeah uh as a tribute to the first appearance that i had uh uh on patreon i am bringing you back the real or fake game yes

the first time we did it was with real or fake anime and then a short little stint with real or fake superheroes this time i uh am bringing to you real or fake western animation um because apparently it doesn't have to be an anime for it to be something that you haven't heard of and for it to be very, very strange.

And I'm looking forward to hearing what you guys may or may not know.

Have you watched any of these?

Ooh, that's a great question.

Uh, most of these I have not.

Uh, a lot of these, you'll find there was a very experimental era with cartoons, and it really took place in the decade of the 80s.

So, most of these, most of these come from the 80s, because I was like, what is this?

This is very interesting.

Children, sit down and let Uncle Adle tell you of a little thing called street sharks.

Yeah, no, I know street sharks.

I do know street sharks.

They're like sharks in cutoff jean shorts.

It was sort of the Ninja Turtle craze

launched many ships.

It truly did.

The 80s is wild because I feel like...

Animation nowadays is so big.

I can't keep up with TV and movies just in general, but I feel like the animation, I was with a group of other parents and they were like talking about the shows that their kids are watching.

And man, they just had lists and lists of shit.

I've never fucking heard, because I've heard of shit.

I've heard of like bluey, right?

But cocome melon, Peppa Pig.

Yeah, these are versions of cocoa melon.

It's insane.

That's my favorite breakfast is cocoa melon and Peppa Pig.

Yeah, I got a Peppa pig under the ground right now.

It's been cooking for 18 hours.

Ladies and gentlemen, salt and Peppa Pig.

Peppa Pig is adorable, though.

I got to say.

Peppa Pig and Bluey.

Bluey.

Peppa Pig looks like.

Bluey's the best.

Yeah.

Well, but these are from the 80s.

So

these are mostly from the 80s.

Okay.

If not all, but I could be missing some.

But yeah, a lot of these are from that era.

And yeah, maybe you, maybe you have heard of these.

Maybe not.

I'm going to just stick with describing the plots to you and then giving you the name of the animation if you guess it um and then some of these have come from my audience so i'll also precede it with who may have submitted the prompt okay a lot of these are going to be from me so that's not going to be required um i think you should say your own name before you read a lot of these i was born in the 80s but i predict i'm going to do very poorly here yeah same exact exactly i've never done well at a game on the show and i'm not going to start today thomas no not today thomas i don't know who knows you might have a good in intuition on these.

I want to say there's a cartoon called the Snorks and it was sort of like if you drown smurfs.

Hey Adel, don't don't spoil.

Don't

you drown smurfs.

Yeah.

And there's also the wuzzles, which I think was like.

Oh, yeah.

There's like an elephant.

There's like an elephant crossed with a bumblebee.

Yes.

And there's like a lion cross.

So it was a bunch of animals who lived on a little in a little community and they're all like hybrid animals.

Like they're all freaks.

Yeah, I was going to say they're absolutely mutants.

It was the cuter version version of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, like JPC said.

It launched a lot of ships.

But yeah,

I remember Snorks.

If you want to just do a buzz and then give me a realer fake based off of your answer, you totally can.

I think that might be the best way to go through it.

But let's start out with this plot.

In the near future, a mad scientist wants to conquer the earth and turn everyone into robot slaves.

Luckily, he's thwarted at every turn by a team of three warriors known by the Centurions.

The first is a white man.

The second is a white man.

And for diversity, the third is a white man with a mustache.

And they fight the true blue American

fusing with assault weapon systems known as Power Extreme.

God, is this the plot to three men and a baby?

It's a Gutenberg dancing.

Sale's the guy with the mustache.

Of course.

You don't realize it, but the mech is a bit, or the baby is a mech.

It transforms into a Jeep, I think.

If only real, if I had a baby that turned into a Jeep,

the dream.

Obviously, it easily tips over, but that's fine.

Aaron, you just sent a link in the chat to an eBay item that's the wuzzles that I was talking about.

Yes.

Stuffed animal.

It's a piggy pine, half porcupine, half pig.

72 bucks.

A steal.

It's got those glowworm eyes.

Look at that.

Oh, yeah.

You can see those two?

Glow worm.

Nala, fuck me, eyes.

Thomas Buzz.

Yes, Adol.

Aaron, this thing is terrifying.

I'm going to say.

I didn't invent it.

That's honestly the

piggy pine or whatever it's called.

That's the least egregious of them.

The rest of them are like.

This one's nightmarish.

Absolutely fucking nightmarish.

I feel like the elephant bumblebee.

Oh, yeah.

That one's.

How would you rank it in comparison to a like a this American girl?

This American girl?

This American girl.

This American girl.

That's a podcast.

This American girl.

My name's Ira Glass.

I'm Samantha.

I was born in 1900.

12-year-old women from the pioneer era.

What is it about?

I'm friends with the poor girl next door.

This 13-year-old lost an arm in a factory.

That's honestly, I'd listen.

I would listen.

I know.

I would too.

I would too, buddy.

All-American Girl dolls should come with a companion podcast that Ira Glass does.

Yeah.

Just

reading the book entry for that person.

Kit Kitteridge.

Girl detective and journalist.

She's a journalist.

All-American Rejects Life.

Thomas, I'm going to say that that was a real cartoon.

Of course, it's a real cartoon.

That sucks.

So what was it called?

It's called The Centurions.

And extra details there is the Power Mech that they wear can also be equipped for space and for water diving.

So I guess the

I don't know if this was a cartoon that was supposed to birth a bunch of toy releases or

vice versa.

I'm not sure, but it does seem like the focus was on the suits, not so much on the very two-dimensional in more than one way men that were featured in this show.

Three mechs and a little baby, I think, could be something.

I love that.

Why didn't that movie spawn a bunch of different cartoons?

Three men and a little baby.

Three necks and a little baby.

That should have had the one with all the toys.

Yes.

Pussy.

Just the action finger.

I'm Tom Selick.

Cute.

Okay.

Moving on to this one.

Regular teens suddenly attain the gift of powerful rings that summon an entity the likes of which Earth has never known.

But this isn't Captain Planet.

What?

It's actually a Planet.

You walked right into the trap.

I know

it isn't captain planet it's actually a bunch of dinosaurs from outer space these teens team up with space dinosaurs in their war against other evil space dinosaurs okay wait a minute dude this is so funny i have to say this is fake i have to say fake i'm gonna go real for balance I feel like I have an image in my head of a young adult watching a cartoon that has like an ambulance, like on two legs, ambulatory triceratops with like a laser gun.

So, I think this is that's it, Adel.

Go to your mind palace, find it out.

I tripped and fell.

Pick my backs out.

Adult's mind palace is talking to him correctly.

This is a real cartoon.

You're kidding me.

I'm thinking

that's insane, but that's insane because there's so much in this that is just a rip-off.

It's like a rip-off of Captain Planet and a rip-off of Transformers, like it, it just with dinosaurs.

What was the name of this one?

this one's called dino saucers and believe it or not this one came out before captain planet whoa all right this is dark-sided this has a terrible energy to it at all i'm so sorry you had to remember this all i feel like i blocked it all out except for the triceratops is there triceratops with like a laser gun i think there is yeah the the uh good space dinosaurs have a special ability called dino volving where they transform into their primitive dinosaur state while maintaining their intelligence and speech.

Bruce Banner could never,

it's like the new Hulk.

And they use this special ability a couple of times at the beginning of the series and then pretty much drop it for the rest of the show.

They never return to that power.

It's like, and you're right.

It's like one part Captain Planet and one part G.I.

Joe.

I don't know.

That's what.

Don't worry, y'all.

There seems to be a hot dinosaur.

Good news, everybody.

There's a hot one.

Have Have you ever seen Land Before Time?

There's always a hot dinosaur.

Excuse me?

One, two, three, four, Hayriddle Riddles Clue Cruise.

Listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free seven-day trial at patreon.com/slash hayriddle riddle.