Patreon Preview #324: Welcome to Minnesota ❄️

The North Star state, land of 10,000 lakes, gopher state.

We are doing Minnesota.

Gopher State.

Like I said, it's the 32nd state.

And what is your experience with that state?

I've only ever lived in three states: Indiana, Illinois, and Minnesota.

Yes.

And what do we think of Minnesota, you guys?

I haven't lived there in, let's see,

how old am I now?

36.

Dropped the 10.

25 years, 26 years.

You've been there since, yes?

Yes.

The last time I was in Minnesota was for a friend's wedding like seven years ago, I want to say.

So I haven't really spent a lot of time in Minnesota.

I like Minnesota.

I've been to Minneapolis.

I can't remember why, but I remember vividly being like...

being gobsmacked at how clean the city is.

Like I remember like in terms like the sidewalks, the streets, I was like, I did not see a speck of trash.

It was fairly immaculate when I went there.

And I was very impressed.

And I remember seeing a music club, music venue with a lot of like, maybe faux signatures on the outside.

And somebody telling me, like, that was the last place Nirvana played or something.

Whoa.

And I know Prince is from Minnesota somewhere.

I know it's a big theater town.

There's a huge theater scene there.

I know that they have a lot of

interconnected sky bridges and underground things for the buildings downtown because I want to say six months out of the year, you don't want to be outside there,

which is probably also why Adel found it so clean was because for six months of the year, people don't use the sidewalks.

I remember when I lived in Minnesota during the wintertime, I did the thing where I took a glass of water and threw it up in the air and watched it freeze before it hit the ground.

That was fun.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

That was a big to-do.

Minnesota.

I saw a moose.

The first moose I ever saw was in Minnesota.

Up on the Canadian border.

So like far north in Minnesota, almost in Canada.

It was humongous.

It scared the absolute shit out of us.

Give it like a scale to me.

Explain to me how big it was.

I was around that same age when I saw Shaquille O'Neal in person for the first time, and the moose was like seeing three Shaquille O'Neals.

Whoa.

Yeah.

And I would equally

would not know what one of them was going to do when they got a basketball in their hands.

I'm like, it could be, it could be some wild shit you've never seen.

If they made a Rock and Bullwinkle with Shaquille O'Neal and like Joe Pesci, I think that would be, I would watch that.

I would as well.

Well, let's talk Minnesota.

You guys had more experience with it than I remembered.

I've been there as well.

I loved it.

I wanted to pick a state that we're headed off to on this tour.

Very excited.

One of my best friends lives there currently.

So that all good reasons to talk about it.

Are they going to come see the show?

I think so.

I like it.

Let's give them a comp.

Let's give them a comp.

You got a constant plan.

Yeah.

If you're Aaron's friend, you get a comp.

Yeah, we'll give you two.

Bring a date.

Bring a date.

Bring a date.

Who are you dating now?

Are you dating anyone?

You don't have to be, but if you want to share this moment with a special someone.

Yeah, if you want to bring someone along.

Okay, so here are some famous people who were born there.

Prince, Bob Dylan, Judy Garland, Jessica Lang, Chris Pratt, Winona Ryder, and Sinclair Lewis, the author.

Here are some shows.

Pratt is from Minnesota.

Yeah.

Wow.

I'm going to skip that part.

Here are some famous locations.

Mall of America.

Yep.

Been there.

Oh, yes.

Created in 1992.

I have not been there.

Can I tell you,

and I may be getting the movie wrong, but when I was at in a mall of america the olson twins were also there and they were on a like promoting their movie and i want to say it was billboard dad but it might not have been billboard dad but i remember

what's that brother for sale i don't remember what movie it was but i remember they had a banner that was three stories top tall that was like hanging down the middle it was banner dad That would have been very funny if it said Banner Dad just for that thing.

But I remember, yeah, they were there when we were at the Mall of America, and it was chaos, but also the mall was so big that it was like you could walk the whole mall and not see them.

So it's like the appeal is it's like every store you could ever find at a mall, plus like roller coasters.

That's the appeal, yeah, and mini golf as well.

Okay, indoor, yeah.

Um,

is it still open?

Must be, man, that's crazy.

I would love to go to Mall of America now and just see what it could possibly be after all of the malls have like died, basically.

Approximately 40 million people visit the mall

annually.

Damn.

Can we go before or after our show?

Let me try to figure out what we're doing.

We absolutely probably could.

Hey, to me, the mall of America will always be Darth.

Oh, I guess it's not too far from where we're going to be.

Aaron.

We could go.

Aaron, for me, the Mall of America will always be Darth.

Okay, it's Darth Mall.

Sorry, I was missing your joke because I was looking something up on a map.

Well, then, you know what?

Let's have that bring us to our first game.

This one's a mini-game.

Real or fake ride at Mall of America.

Whoa, okay.

I'd tell you to keep your own score, but I did that earlier today, and both of you told me to fuck right off.

It was hard to do.

Your words.

All right.

SpongeBob SquarePants, Rock Bottom, Plunge.

Real.

That is real.

God damn.

Are these all current or are these just like historical attractions that were at Mall of America?

I'm just saying, I don't know.

Okay, great.

I don't know either.

The Paul Bunyan log shoot.

That seems real.

That is real.

Dora's Sky Adventure.

No.

What could that possibly be?

Like, does Dora have a big tie-in with sky or did they just want to do indoor skydiving with like a Dora theme?

Real.

I want to say real.

It's fake.

Target kids for skydiving.

The Tater Tot Twister.

Real.

That's got to be real in the food court.

I remember when I was in seventh grade someone gave me one of the worst tater tot twisters that i've ever had in my entire life i forgot your nipples are the size of tater tots yeah inconsistency still

um fake fake yes fairly odd coaster fake this

i hope that's fake that's i gotta say fake right it's real no based on i think the fairly odd parents ip yeah i hope so i hope so otherwise it's like yeah just just weirdo parents being like i think we could ride this I would not get on a coaster that built itself as odd.

The Minnesota ice slide.

Minnesota ice slide.

Oof.

Fake.

I'll say fake.

It is fake.

Yeah.

Back at the barnyard hayride.

Fake.

A hayride.

Inside a mall, but the mall of America is the place that that would be a thing that could happen.

I'm going to say real.

It's fake.

Damn.

You're falling for the traps.

I thought it could be like a seasonal thing, too.

Like they have like a hayride in there, like around

hay season.

You know what?

Maybe they do have a hay ride.

You know what?

Maybe they do.

Thank you, Eric.

We're definitely going to this mall when we go there, you guys.

I think that

look, there's a possibility if this the Minneapolis show is, or the St.

Paul show, I should say, is selling really well.

But if it sells out, we might add another day.

And if we add another day, it would be that Monday.

So then we could spend all Monday at the mall and then go.

All Monday at the mall.

It's a big mall.

I want to do something, and this requires a lot of trust.

I want everyone to be sincere.

Okay.

What is your number one mall store?

And this can be past or present.

You get $100 to spend a store in the mall.

What's your go-to?

Damn, this is tough.

I mean, candles in anthropology.

Okay.

If it's me and it's past, it's got to be like the Lego store.

Although I don't ever think I went in a Lego store.

I think I always just bought Legos at like Kmartin's or whatever.

But now, like, now, if you told, you know, what, 10-year-old me that I could go to the mall and spend $100 at the Lego store, I think I'd be ecstatic.

Also, if they have it, American Girl Store would be actually my number one answer.

They have it.

They have to have it.

No, they might not.

I'm looking it up.

At Mall of America, they have every store there.

I would be shocked if they didn't have an American Girl store.

I'm looking.

I'm looking.

And I bet they have the other continents too.

Yeah.

The South American Girl Store.

Looks like they don't.

Damn it.

But they do have a a hooter's so same thing same thing that's the american women's store one two three four hate riddle riddles clue crew

listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free seven-day trial at patreon.com slash hay riddle riddle