Patreon Preview #339: I've Got a Silver Sausage!

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Transcript

Good morning, JBC and Aaron.

Good morning.

Good morning, Mischief.

Mr.

Adel.

I feel like he has a tone of authority that he doesn't usually have.

Oh, would you say that?

Have a seat.

Oh, okay.

This is very formal.

It's been over 1,660 days since we've done something on this podcast.

Do you know what that is?

Wait, how many days?

Gotten along?

1,000 something?

1,660 days.

1,600?

I think so.

Hold on.

Lots of six days.

I've lost all three, six, nine.

Is that five years?

I don't think we've done one of these since January 23rd, 2021.

Oh, my God.

I think.

Oh, my God.

From by quick flash research, as they say in the industry.

Flash research.

Adel.

Done one of what?

Done one of what?

Done one of what, Adel?

Grabs collar.

Done one of what?

Adel.

Adel.

Done one of what.

Just buy that dog collar.

It's beautiful.

Oh, thank you.

Since we've done a Disney Twins,

when we last left.

Runs to the door.

It's locked.

Runs to the window.

They're locked.

No.

Move.

Move.

Get her.

Get her.

Get her.

Put her in one of those clockwork orange machines.

You know.

The clockwork orange machine.

Hold your eyes open, make you watch the business.

Put me back in my comfort clockwork orange machine

i have social anxiety i have to sit in my clockwork orange machine i'm a moog what are they moogs

yeah moogs they're moogs well you're not moogs you're danny and deborah disney when we last left danny and deborah disney what do you think they were doing i'll give you 10 seconds to get i want to say kissing was it you're close were they on they were we were on apathy avenue right you were on apathy i was gonna say animal crossing

well i think animal crossing you died, went to heaven, and then Apathy Avenue, you came back to life for a mission.

At the end of Apathy Avenue, I believe you were in purgatory.

You were sort of granted a wish to become something.

Do you two remember what you chose to become?

Dude, this happened four years ago.

No, you're right to ask me because normally I remember bullshit like this.

Aaron, would you believe that Deborah,

we last saw Deborah,

turning herself into a pizza?

Okay, I don't remember that.

JBC, would you believe that Danny, when we last saw him, was turned into a Joseph A.

Banks store?

That sounds correct.

That sounds like a COVID madness.

Is this like a Wonder Twins thing that they had?

Like,

form of Joseph A.

Banks stored

pizza.

No.

That delivery of no is so fucking funny.

Nah.

So,

nah.

We cut to a, I don't know, like a back alley in Minneapolis, I guess, where we see a

back alley used

in this.

A soiled pizza in a shuttered Joseph Abanks store.

And I just want the two of you to sort of just have a little scene to catch up after four years of the two of you living in sort of squalor.

Well, Deborah, that didn't work out.

Danny.

Well, it went well for like three years, but we're not showing that part, are we?

It only recently got bad.

I don't know, Deborah.

It was always kind of bad for me.

I just don't think I'm cut out to be at Jose Bank's suit store, and I'm not 100% sure any of them are still in business anymore.

But people just kept taking the suits.

I think that's part of what is supposed to happen, Danny.

I think they're supposed to leave money or something.

Oh, yeah, that is a big part of it.

But I got to be inside you for some of it.

That wasn't so bad.

Yeah, I did have to to kick that guy out for eating a pizza at a suit store.

But I guess I couldn't make him leave because I was just kind of this disembodied voice coming out of a suit store.

I wonder if the parts of the suits that people took were part of me.

Oh, yeah.

As you talk, you get this sort of warm sensation of familiarity.

Oh, I'm peeing.

Oh,

sorry.

No, the HVAC guy is just draining the fluid in the.

Oh, thank God.

The two of you get sort of a warm feeling of reconnection and how things used to be uh aaron go ahead and give a roll of your d20 deborah has um of course a proclivity for musicality if it ever come in handy

out of the gate of 20.

20 perfect so aaron you were an absolutely disgusting pizza i mean can you imagine leaving a pizza out on a street for four years that's what you looked like with a d20 you hear a popping sound suddenly you look down and what where there once was sort of browned cheese

is now your hand and skin.

You are unless it wasn't McDonald's pizza, because then it would look exactly the same.

Oh, I missed those pizzas.

McDonald's had pizzas?

You guys might have been too young.

McDonald's used to have pizza, and it was fucking delicious.

Wait, is this real?

No way.

They had personal, they only served like four-sliced little pizzas.

Oh, like personal pan pizzas.

Yeah, okay.

They did exist.

They did exist.

They do exist.

This was probably late 80s, early 90s.

I remember when Wendy's had fried chicken.

Excuse me, what?

Maybe it was just one Wendy's that I went to as a child.

Wendy's used to have like solariums in the back, like these beautiful glasses.

Solariums.

That orb that Saurard churches?

What am I thinking of?

You can't use that because Sauron will see you use the solarium.

So, Aaron, you are

where you were once sort of

disgusting slimy pepperoni and all this stuff, you are now fully, wholly back to Aaron Keith.

Sorry, back to Deborah Disney.

100%.

Yeah, I went to Aaron Keefe, and now I'm going to melt back to Deborah.

You did that like Matrix thing where like Mr.

Smith's face comes out of all like sides and then it went back into Deborah.

JPC, please.

I'm a person again.

Hold on.

I'm covering sauce.

Stop a sooth store still.

JPC, please roll for Danny.

Okay, roll for Danny.

12.

I said 12.

12.

Great.

So you also feel this warm sensation sort of flood your body and

you feel the existence of limbs.

You definitely have two up top, two at the bottom.

As you look down, they are not exactly how you remember.

Some sort of look like

clothing racks.

So it's like a metal.

It's like a metal pole and it feels like you're wearing several layers, almost like Chandler in that one episode of Friends where he wears.

No, sorry, that's Joey who wears everything Chandler wears.

So scrap that analogy.

Could I be any more Joey wears what you had?

So

you are mostly Danny Disney, but there are some parts of you that are a holdover from the Joseph A base.

Oh man, Deborah, I think it mattered that people took the suits.

Oh no, but Danny, we done did it.

We're back to what we did before.

Wait, does that mean...

Does that mean purgatory is over?

I don't know.

Let's go on a new adventure, you and I.

What was that that you just did?

And as you lean in for a second kiss.

You can't reject.

You cannot leave me alone in that.

That's the meanest thing ever.

That is being abandoned on my birthday level meme.

I just don't remember.

I'm still half a sooth store.

That's not like...

Booking a week-long cruise together and then one of you backs out.

That is.

Yes, and I'm on the boat.

For one of you to be like,

we don't kiss anymore.

That was never a thing.

That is, JPC, that is brutal.

That's not like I got invited to the movies by people in my class, and I went to the movies and saw the movie.

And they're like, we changed your mind and went to a different movie.

Like that level of absolutely cutscene.

What are you guys talking?

Aaron, stay in it.

What are you guys talking about?

And as Danny and Deborah lean in for a...

My dude favorite, they used to tell Aaron to stay in it.

Stay in it.

Stay in it.

As Danny and Deborah lean in for a possible second kiss,

you both close your eyes and you hear a pop.

You wake up and

you're both in the same bed together.

It doesn't feel like a night's passage of time has went by.

It feels like it was just a millisecond, but you are in the same bed together.

But Danny's feet are up by Deborah's head and Deborah's head is down by Danny's feet, almost like a...

well, some might call it like a 69 position, but you were both seemingly asleep.

You're in pajamas.

And as you wake up, you look around and there's

another couple next to you in bed, sort of sleeping head to foot.

As a young boy enters the room,

his name is Chuck Fuckett.

We know his name is Chuck Fuckett?

He's a name tag on?

Well, I just said it.

I said his name is Chuck Fuckett.

Who are you?

And I guess by hearing...

I'm sort of an omniscient voice.

Okay.

Okay, we hear what you say.

Danny, we're back in our regular sleeping position.

This is

who are they?

Who's Chuck?

Fuck it.

Uncle Bedsores, Auntie Bedsores.

I'm never gonna find that silver sausage.

I feel like everyone else in the world has found a silver sausage except for me.

I'm never gonna get to go to silly Silvio's meat packing plant.

Danny, shh, this little kid's giving us exposition.

Quick, write it down.

One, two, three, four, eight, Ridgel Ridgels Clue Crew.

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