What a Weekday: Post-Storm Politics and Pre-Debate Jitters

29m
Trump heads into the wake of Hurricane Helene, despite everyone asking him not to. Climate change is at our door, but conservatives pretend they don’t hear all that knocking. Tim Walz and JD Vance carbo-load before the big VP debate, and we say goodbye to Kris Kristofferson, the man, the myth, the star of a movie called Millennium that Lovett and no one else saw. If you want donate to help disaster relief in the Southeast and know your money is going to organizations on the ground, please visit votesameamerica.com/helene today.

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Runtime: 29m

Transcript

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Speaker 5 Is that Baller's Gate 3? Um, do you design your own face in that game?

Speaker 6 Oh, yeah, yeah, there was, there was, um, everything,

Speaker 5 oh, everything, that's right, everything, everything, that's right, that's right. And like, I love that.

Speaker 5 I actually like any of those games, like a Dark Souls game, any of them, like spending like, like, like, spending an hour.

Speaker 5 And it's funny too, because I'll like have, I'll be like, John, this is going to be the time where you just make a super weird,

Speaker 5 freaky character. And it's like, nope, hot dude Mohawk.

Speaker 8 And we're back.

Speaker 5 I'm here with Hallie, Sarah, and Kendra.

Speaker 5 Let's get into it. What a weekday.

Speaker 5 Western North Carolina has been devastated by Hurricane Helene with catastrophic flooding, wiping out homes, roads, and infrastructure.

Speaker 5 If any listener has an idea for how to make a punchline out of this, please email us at massivetragedy at crooked.com with the subject line goofs.

Speaker 5 President Biden said on Monday that he will travel to areas hit by the storm later this week, but added that he would not make a presidential visit at the risk of diverting or delaying any of the response assets needed to deal with this crisis.

Speaker 5 Yeah, the last thing we need is Biden getting swept away in a flood. This isn't July.

Speaker 5 Vice President Harris also has abided by governor's request to stay out of the way, speaking with Governors Roy Cooper, Brian Kemp, and Ron DeSantis by phone, assuring them that the administration would provide their states with whatever they needed.

Speaker 5 You can keep your woke money, DeSantis replied before adding, oh, I'm sorry. That was old habit.
Thank you for your concern. It's important that the federal and state governments work hand in glove.

Speaker 5 Said Governor Cooper, I told the president that we did not need election officials that require a lot of security and attention because we need to make sure that we're getting the work done on the ground.

Speaker 5 It's like when I try to help write this show and Howie tells me if I don't, it will go much faster and fewer people will die.

Speaker 7 That's unfair.

Speaker 5 It's unfair. That's unfair to me.

Speaker 9 At least a few, a few fewer.

Speaker 5 North Carolina GOP Representative Chuck Edwards told Politico, the people in my district really don't want to see politicians.

Speaker 5 They want to see water, food, cell towers, and power restored, and the ability to contact their loved ones. Photo ops are not what's needed, continued Edwards.

Speaker 5 Unless, of course, Jimmy Carter got his 100-year-old ass down here. That'd be something.
We'd trade the cell towers for that.

Speaker 5 We'd hear a motor in the distance and turn to see the oldest bastard in the world whipping around this floating Denny's on a jet ski wheelchair. That would help a lot.

Speaker 7 Hey, happy birthday, Jimmy Carter.

Speaker 5 Happy birthday, Jimmy Carter, 100.

Speaker 11 100.

Speaker 13 Also, if anyone who works at the Jimmy Carter Presidential Library, please restock the Jimmy Carter 100 hat.

Speaker 7 I really want one. We know you're watching.

Speaker 5 Well, he makes them. Jimmy Carter's making them.
He makes them. He sews them.

Speaker 13 Please hurry, Jimmy.

Speaker 5 Donald Trump, however, attacked both Biden and Harris for not immediately canceling their plans and rushing to devastated areas that were unequipped to receive them while continuing on his own regularly scheduled rallies over the weekend.

Speaker 5 Said Trump, I mean, if you're not going to do a photo app, why even have the Jews press their hurricane buttons?

Speaker 5 Yeah, like there is a lot of the amount of like conspiracy theories just sort of rising up from the bottom immediately.

Speaker 5 Like the storm is still unfolding and you see people online saying that Democrats have failed or abandoning rural areas.

Speaker 5 I saw people saying, thinking that, like, I think genuinely believing that like somehow particle accelerators were responsible for this and that CERN had unleashed the hurricane.

Speaker 9 It's easier than just admitting that climate change is happening. Like it's like that, we're going to only see the crazier and crazier conspiracy theories as we deny it more and more.

Speaker 5 I did appreciate, though, the logic of this conspiracy theory because the person was like,

Speaker 5 I'm not going to Google that CERN caused or didn't cause the hurricane. That's ridiculous.

Speaker 5 And

Speaker 5 the man asserting this conspiracy theory said, what is a hurricane if not a bunch of accelerated particles? And I appreciated that. Hard to argue with that.
It's hard to argue with that.

Speaker 5 Yes, on Monday, former President Trump, despite bipartisan requests for politicians to stay the fuck away, flew to Georgia for a photo op and what his campaign called a briefing on Hurricane Helene.

Speaker 5 Why would Trump, a private citizen, receive a briefing on the storm's response as the emergency response itself is unfolding? Great question. Oh, hang on.

Speaker 5 Would you look at the time? I'm late for my Pentagon briefing.

Speaker 5 Here's a photo of people building a brick wall out of debris from destroyed businesses for Donald Trump to stand behind at his little podium.

Speaker 5 They had no choice. Trump has a wall I can crash through like the Kool-Aid man right there on his rider.

Speaker 5 That is unbelievable.

Speaker 5 that

Speaker 5 all of these, even the mayor of this city,

Speaker 5 it's a non-partisan job, said,

Speaker 5 we would have preferred, obviously, he's in a difficult position, right? You don't want to, like, he doesn't want to pick a fight with Donald Trump for coming to his city.

Speaker 5 But he basically was like, I would have preferred Donald Trump come later in the week where

Speaker 5 this is not the right time.

Speaker 5 Upon arriving in Georgia, Trump claimed that Governor Kemp had been unable to, upon arriving in Georgia, Trump claimed, without evidence, that Governor Brian Kemp of Georgia had been unable to reach Biden.

Speaker 5 Like his fellow millennials, Biden prefers to text.

Speaker 5 This put Kemp in an awkward position, as he is a Republican that continues to have at least one last gossamer strand tethering him to reality, in which after a natural disaster, you may privately think through how to project strength, compassion, manage the politics, but you don't make up brazen lies about political opponents while people are still stranded and in danger.

Speaker 5 Here's the governor.

Speaker 14 I just spoke. The president just called me yesterday afternoon.
I missed him and called him right back. And he just said, hey, what do you need?

Speaker 14 He offered that if there's other things we need, just to call him directly, which I appreciate that.

Speaker 5 Overcome by the feeling of liberalism, Kemp panicked, adding a quick no-homo. At his press conference, Trump also offered this bit of wisdom.

Speaker 15 Nobody thought this would be happening, especially now it's so late in the season for the hurricanes.

Speaker 5 It is the peak of hurricane season.

Speaker 5 Nobody thought this would be happening, cried Donald Trump as the opening chords of Espresso boomed at the Sabrina Carpenter Show.

Speaker 5 Unfortunately, it will take time before we know the extent of the damage across Florida, Georgia, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Virginia. But at least 130 people have died as of this recording.

Speaker 5 Millions have been displaced or are without power. Thousands of homes and businesses have been destroyed by flooding.

Speaker 5 I don't have a joke for this, so I'll share an embarrassing personal anecdote to ease you into this more serious part of the monologue.

Speaker 5 I was once on a toilet while Air Force One was landing, and I was so afraid I would have to ask the motorcade to stop to let me go to the bathroom that I considered whether I could pull off faking a seizure.

Speaker 9 Also, you know you can, right?

Speaker 8 Pull off faking a seizure.

Speaker 16 There's no way.

Speaker 9 They would know immediately like, okay, this guy has to stick a shit.

Speaker 5 But here was my feeling about it, which is that if I am on this trip, like I don't get to go on a lot of these trips. Like that's like, it was like a big deal that I was like staffing this whole trip.

Speaker 5 We're going in between, it was like, I think like a 30-minute motorcade. And I'm like, I don't know.
I'm like feeling sick. Like I don't know that I can make it to the end.

Speaker 5 And I was just imagining what it would be like to be for the rest of my life to have been the person that made the motorcade stop so that I could

Speaker 5 shit my pants on the side of a highway.

Speaker 13 And I really, if you tell the secret service you have to go to the bathroom, do they stop or do they just stop?

Speaker 5 I don't know the answer, right? I don't actually know what would have happened, but I had to assume that maybe like the van I was in would leave, would pull over, and we would just stop.

Speaker 5 We would find a place for, but like, imagine that unfolding. Like, somebody on the radio is saying, like, this van needs to go stop to find a bathroom.

Speaker 5 And, like, I was just imagining all this and, like, starting to really have like incredible anxiety, sweat.

Speaker 5 And I'm just like, I like, if you're, if you're having a medical emergency, you can shit yourself in a medical emergency.

Speaker 9 Oh, so you were still going to plan to shit yourself. Well, there was the only thing that's going to be like, is there a way to be like, I got to get away from this?

Speaker 5 No, no, no, no.

Speaker 5 My, I was just like, if, if this gets, and I, none of this happened, but like, I, in my mind, I was like, oh, what is the only only way, like, if you're having a seizure and you have go, like, everyone's like, oh, this is serious.

Speaker 5 Something's terrible is happening. It's sad.

Speaker 13 And shit to yourself is no longer at the headline.

Speaker 12 Right.

Speaker 5 Right. It's a sub headline.
It's something that happened because of the seizure. And I was in my mind, I was like, how hard can I fake this? Because then you get to the hospital.
They're doing an MRI.

Speaker 5 It's inconclusive. No one's saying you didn't have a seizure.
No one is saying that. As long as you commit, no one's.

Speaker 17 No, they're definitely going to be able to say you didn't have a seizure.

Speaker 7 I don't think so.

Speaker 1 I looked it up.

Speaker 5 I don't think so.

Speaker 9 i don't think so i think they may not maybe they may have their suspicions they may have their suspicions but it's not like anyone's gonna leave behind like lesions or something love it i think sometimes you think yourself is like james bond absolutely everyone at that hospital everyone you work with everyone it's like yeah we know you also you would tell them two weeks later you would tell everybody i would you think i think i think of myself as james bond the idea that you thought at any level you could pull this off implies to me that you think of yourself as a completely different person i don't know that i could have pulled it off i don't know that i could have pulled it off i'm just saying you don't know that I couldn't pull it off.

Speaker 8 You can be suspicious.

Speaker 9 I will have a time machine and go back in time and tell you to try to pull it off.

Speaker 17 Also, with stomach pains, I would have just gone with stomach pains and said, I think my appendix is bursting.

Speaker 6 Oh, that's good.

Speaker 1 That's an emergency thing.

Speaker 5 Oh, and you already were like that.

Speaker 6 Right, right.

Speaker 5 Well, these are great options.

Speaker 9 See, Kendra could fake a seeder if she wanted to.

Speaker 17 No, I don't think I could.

Speaker 6 That's why I'm going with the appendix.

Speaker 5 I really, I really,

Speaker 5 doctors, doctors, put it in the comments, but I do think, what do you think?

Speaker 5 So, what actually happened?

Speaker 1 Oh, I know. The answer is no, David, wait, David is not on the mic, and David would like to know what happened.

Speaker 5 What happened was

Speaker 5 we made it to, we were like in farm country, in like, I think rural Iowa, and we got to the next place and the president went up to speak and I darted and I found a porta potty.

Speaker 5 There's a photo that exists

Speaker 5 where I like was having this secret shame the whole day of like spinning, I was just like, I was like having like a terrible stomach thing.

Speaker 5 And there's a photo of like, we were, we were at some farm and there was some like, um, like a

Speaker 5 like barrel or something.

Speaker 5 Anyways, I got in the barrel. Like there's a photo of me like waving from inside a barrel for like a funny picture because unbeknownst to everybody, I was like dying inside.

Speaker 5 I think it may have been my birthday.

Speaker 9 It's like you're a cat that came to life and it's like, you almost understand what you should be doing in Hades scenario, but it's like, no, I'll hide it. It's like, why?

Speaker 9 Just tell people you're not well. Nope.
Was the porta potty clean?

Speaker 5 No. Was the porta potty at the Iowa farm cleaned?

Speaker 5 David was not.

Speaker 5 Okay, back at it. Rebuilding these areas will cost tens of billions of dollars.

Speaker 5 Governor Roy Cooper said that the road rebuilding alone will constitute a massive expense as the roads will have to be hardened to withstand worsening weather due to climate change.

Speaker 5 One note: if you want to make a donation to help on the ground in the wake of Helene, you can go to votesaveamerica.com/slash Helene.

Speaker 5 The team has very quickly stood up a fund that is getting resources to organizations on the ground that are providing aid.

Speaker 5 So, if you're looking for a place to donate, go to votesaveamerica.com slash Helene, and your donations will go to a few groups that are doing very good work.

Speaker 5 If Donald Trump has gotten his way, the federal government would currently be shut down as President Trump tried to slash FEMA disaster response, as President Trump responded to requests after natural disasters based on which governors were nice to him.

Speaker 5 And if Donald Trump is president again, he will point anti-climate zealots throughout the administration with a singular goal to undermine, privatize, and disband the agencies that collect and report data on climate change, agencies like NOAA and the Office of Oceanic and Atmospheric Research.

Speaker 5 The plan also calls for a review of the National Hurricane Center to ensure it provides its data neutrally, which means not acknowledging that climate change is making these storms more frequent and severe.

Speaker 5 This is the less bombastic and more sophisticated, grinding daily work of destroying the world.

Speaker 5 Burrow deep into the Federal Register, close an office, cut a budget, slowly shift the terms of the debate. And this effort has worked.
Look at this ad from 2011.

Speaker 18 Hi, I'm Nancy Pelosi, lifelong Democrat and Speaker of the House.

Speaker 19 And I'm Newt Gingrich, lifelong Republican, and I used to be Speaker.

Speaker 18 We don't always see eye to eye, do we, Newt?

Speaker 19 No, but we do agree our country must take action to address climate change.

Speaker 5 I remember when I worked in the Senate, either right before I had joined or right when I had joined Hillary Clinton's Senate office, Hillary Clinton went to Alaska on a bipartisan trip with John McCain, Lindsey Graham, Susan Collins.

Speaker 5 It was a trip about, or at least in part about what was happening with climate change.

Speaker 5 They spoke to like people that were running sled dogs about how much warmer it had gone, how they didn't need gloves, about all the problems that were already happening because of climate change.

Speaker 5 There was a ton of denialism, like the influence of industry groups, the ideological groups the think tanks like it was of course there the fact that john mccain and newt gingrich uh were and lindsey graham who is just a wraith who follows around a big man uh in this case it was john mccain now trump like the fact that newt gingrich was doing this was a story because republicans had been so hostile to climate change but this was happening like there was a place inside of what with the republican party uh for acknowledging and addressing climate change This is where the Republican Party is now.

Speaker 15 They don't even talk about the environment anymore. You know why? Mike is saying, don't talk about it now.

Speaker 15 No, it's one of the great scams of all time. You know why they don't talk about it?

Speaker 15 Because people aren't buying it anymore.

Speaker 5 By the way, good luck, Mike, on getting Trump to not talk about something. You're trying to put a leash on a garter snake with this one.
Every other issue aside.

Speaker 5 2024 is the climate election. I know it can be exhausting hearing that every election is a hinge point for civilization, but unfortunately, that's what it is.
Right now, the floor is lava.

Speaker 5 Maybe it won't always be. Maybe we defeat this brand of extremism so thoroughly that craven Republicans moderate not out of some ethical obligation, but out of survival.
But until then, lava.

Speaker 8 It's lava.

Speaker 5 Ugh, this is the pep talk I'd hope it'd be. Well, we need a distraction.
Kendra, do you have any strong, surprising opinions about skeet shooting at country clubs?

Speaker 10 No.

Speaker 8 I'm sorry.

Speaker 5 Damn.

Speaker 17 To be clear, the reason that I learned how to shoot is because, and Charlotte can vouch for this, at Oberlin, there was a sign on the door of our dance club that said please do not bring your firearm in here and that scared the fuck out of me because suddenly I was in a place where like oh there could just be a firearm here and the only thing is like please don't bring it in here so I was like I guess I better learn how to use one of these things in case it drops on the floor while we're dancing to Rihanna Oberlin yeah Ohio baby yeah huh Lena Dunham's Oberlin yeah JD Vance is Ohio and then when I went to the gun range with my friends we were turned away by a man who definitely would have described our presence as, guess what?

Speaker 17 A nigger, a fat girl, and a Jew walked into this ball, into this gun range.

Speaker 9 I don't even know the punchline, but I'm laughing.

Speaker 5 I'm sorry.

Speaker 5 I don't, was that something something, something you imagined he would say, or something that was said?

Speaker 17 Oh, the vibe was definitely there.

Speaker 6 Oh.

Speaker 16 Just a. Have you been to Ohio?

Speaker 7 Yeah, real time.

Speaker 5 I've been to Ohio. I just also just was not expecting a

Speaker 5 hard R N-word during this recording.

Speaker 1 There we go,

Speaker 1 We got there.

Speaker 7 Yeah, okay.

Speaker 10 Look alive. Love it.
All right.

Speaker 5 It's hard. Yep.

Speaker 7 Oberlin.

Speaker 12 A department store in Ohio called Lazarus, but it's gone now.

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Speaker 5 It hardly seems worth mentioning at this point, but Trump also called for the purge this weekend.

Speaker 15 One rough hour, and I mean real rough, the word will get out and it will end immediately. End immediately.

Speaker 15 You know, it'll end immediately.

Speaker 5 I do think it's worth like parsing what the it is here, right? Because like this week we learned that once again, violent crime is down and falling. So what is the it that gets all the applause?

Speaker 5 And I think the it is their response to videos playing on Fox News of like property theft, of like uh of like department stores and stores being robbed in cities.

Speaker 5 It's videos of homeless people in San Francisco, and it's people not liking that items at CVS are locked behind a little plastic door now.

Speaker 5 And look, I don't think any of us like having to press the button and wait for a stranger to come to the wall of fibergummies and deodorants so that you can gesture at the items of which your need reflects the unspoken reality of your disgusting corpus.

Speaker 5 No,

Speaker 5 no, we don't.

Speaker 5 All right, we can go keep going. I got it.

Speaker 9 It's all, it is all the most embarrassing items, like, it's all the most intimate, it's razors. Like, it's just like, I'm sorry, it's for my body.

Speaker 1 All right, my hairy, stinky beast.

Speaker 10 Oh, I'm gross.

Speaker 17 And because Target doesn't want to pay people anymore, there's no one to open them.

Speaker 6 Right. It's real person.

Speaker 5 I do think that, like,

Speaker 5 there is something about the, the,

Speaker 5 like, it's like,

Speaker 5 of course, like the fact that we go into these stores and press these buttons to wait for some person who hates fucking being there to come deal with this issue, and then you go and do these awful self-checkouts with a person there who all like it all is like a reflection of a problem, but like not the problem they're talking about.

Speaker 5 Like, no, we all actually collectively chose that we wanted cheaper items from massive chains than going to like local

Speaker 5 pharmacies that were smaller, had fewer selections, were more expensive. Like we all collectively chose this.
We all like self-checkout is just a way for them to pay fewer people.

Speaker 5 And by the way, they know that there's some amount of loss that comes with having self-checkout. It just costs them less money than having a person actually wring out the items.

Speaker 5 Like we are choosing this kind of impersonal interaction, these terrible, like kind of reducing the retail experience, like removing the human aspect, the social aspect out of so much of what happens, even when we leave our phones and leave our computers.

Speaker 5 Like, we're all collectively choosing this, and it does make life worse, but this is not the reason. Like,

Speaker 5 the wall of items is

Speaker 5 the button thing. This is a way of having fewer people working at this store.

Speaker 13 I do think we're halfway there, and we should just go back to the old general store model: you come in with a list, and there's one person behind the counter, and they go get your twine off the shelf, whatever, whatever you need.

Speaker 5 Yeah, the old model, the general store model. Yeah, like every once in a while, like there's one, there's like an old school hardware store in my my old neighborhood and

Speaker 5 uh like one of those like hardware stores from the pre-Home Depot era where it's small and yet they have everything somehow and you just like go to up go to a person who just you just know knows every single way to fix every single thing and you're like, hey, I need this one kind of screw and like you walk down an aisle and then there's a little section that's for that exact kind of screw you would never have found in a million years.

Speaker 17 Home Depot actually used to be like that. You could walk into the Home Depot, which I know because we built two ponds in my backyard.

Speaker 17 And so you could like walk into the Home Depot and a person there, every person there knew how to do

Speaker 7 something.

Speaker 5 They hired like retired, like older people who like knew how to build, like construction people and contractors and builders.

Speaker 5 And like they, they hired those kinds of guys and they just stopped doing it.

Speaker 13 Also, we got to start calling it sundries again. You go in for your sundries.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 11 I grew up going to a five and dime.

Speaker 8 There was one in my town.

Speaker 5 Trump also called the president and vice president mentally disabled.

Speaker 6 Please

Speaker 8 get back on the fucking script.

Speaker 15 Joe Biden became mentally impaired. Kamala was born that way.

Speaker 15 She was born that way.

Speaker 15 And if you think about it, only a mentally disabled person could have allowed this to happen to our country. Anybody would know this.

Speaker 5 Well, I really regret buying this Born This Way merch from the official Trump site.

Speaker 5 That was a blunder. I just wanted to get my paws up, you know?

Speaker 13 I just want to point out that the name of this town is Prairie Dog, Wisconsin, but in French.

Speaker 8 Oh, isn't it?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 That's cool. I like that.

Speaker 12 Just a prairie dog, a little beret.

Speaker 5 There's

Speaker 5 somebody inside of Touch of Elegance.

Speaker 5 There's somebody inside of the Trump machine that is writing him just true jokes, like structured, either maybe they have some, some comedy person is like submitting, because that, that, there was that line the other day where he's like, I want to go to the friar to see where Kamala didn't work, you know, or this line of like, Joe Biden got mentally unimpaired, but Kamala was born dumb, like that kind of stuff.

Speaker 5 Like these are, these are structured jokes he's trying to do.

Speaker 9 But I like how it's like, they're not jokes. They're just, they're, they're, they're sentences written like what he would have been capable of four years ago.

Speaker 9 It's still not a joke by any sort of imagination.

Speaker 17 But it's a talented ghostwriter.

Speaker 9 And I want to be clear, I agree with you just because like even a month ago, he wasn't doing this.

Speaker 8 He's much more incoherent recently.

Speaker 5 It's a very specific kind of joke, though. It's like a very like

Speaker 5 cat skills kind of joke. Like,

Speaker 5 you know,

Speaker 5 I may be, you know, like,

Speaker 5 it's like the, like, I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can lose weight. That kind of joke, you know, like, that's the vibe.

Speaker 13 I think it does speak to how there aren't enough comedy writing jobs right now. People are getting desperate.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's really a problem. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Trump also claimed to have a better body than President Biden.

Speaker 15 I could have been sunbathing on the beach. You have never seen a body so beautiful.
Much better than,

Speaker 14 much better than Sleepy Joe.

Speaker 5 Gentlemen, please, for the last time, you're both ultra-fuckable. You hate to see one perfect 10 tearing down another perfect 10 like this.
It makes the nines like me feel bad.

Speaker 5 I like that. This is Trump making fun of how he looks.
His body is like one of the few areas where he allows himself to be self-deprecating. He does it.

Speaker 5 He fairly often makes fun of his own, like, I look good in a bathing suit. But he's joking.
He knows he's a

Speaker 5 disgusting, disgusting man. But he couldn't help but then also say he looks better than Joe Biden,

Speaker 5 which then kind of undoes the good work he's done to be self-deprecating, even for a moment earlier.

Speaker 9 He has said multiple times that he's better looking than Kamala.

Speaker 10 And that's what it's like, all right. You're overplaying your hand.

Speaker 5 But I think that's, he's kidding. He knows, he knows, he knows he's not better than Kamala.

Speaker 16 I don't know when that man knows anymore.

Speaker 10 I don't know.

Speaker 9 Why even bring it up? Why compare yourselves? You're drawing the vibe. Everyone's eye is visualizing you next to each other.

Speaker 17 I never look for a deeper meaning in anything he says because he's pretty

Speaker 17 straightforward. He's straight-handed.

Speaker 1 You're right.

Speaker 13 I'm realizing the town name is actually Prairie of Dogs.

Speaker 12 I don't know.

Speaker 9 Wasn't that just how French people do it?

Speaker 5 Prairie of Dogs.

Speaker 6 Dog Prairie.

Speaker 5 Speaking of a fuckability contest, the vice presidential debate is headed our way tonight at 9 p.m. Eastern when Tim Walls and J.D.
Vance will square off at the CBS Broadcast Center in New York City.

Speaker 5 After tonight, I'll hopefully be able to tell them apart. Almost like a blast from a pre-Trump past, we have stories with background sources trying to lower expectations.

Speaker 5 According to CNN, Walls is reportedly very nervous. Smart, smart, setting expectations low, a classic football tactic, I assume.

Speaker 5 Come on, Tim Walls. You got this.
You're gonna.

Speaker 5 You're gonna do great. Fuck.
Who gives the pep talk to the pep talk guy?

Speaker 5 Who peps the peppers?

Speaker 6 Usually Connie Britton.

Speaker 19 Connie Britton.

Speaker 5 We need Connie Britton. According to a dozen campaign staffers speaking anonymously to CNN, Walls is afraid of letting Harris down with a botched debate as he does not have Vance's Yale credentials.

Speaker 5 But Tim does have one secret advantage, a worldview that doesn't make every woman in America recoil as if a bat just flew into her face.

Speaker 5 And finally, singer and actor Chris Christopherson passed away this weekend. He is survived by his wife, Kristen Christanofferson.

Speaker 5 In addition to his groundbreaking country music career, Chris Christofferson appeared in in numerous films, including 1977's A Star is Born with Barbara Streisand.

Speaker 5 That version is regarded by many critics as the one where the main guy doesn't piss himself at the Grammys.

Speaker 5 Christofferson was an awesome dude.

Speaker 5 For example, Sinead O'Connor, after she protested the cover-up of child sexual abuse by the Catholic Church by ripping up a photo of the Pope on SNL, faced a ton of backlash.

Speaker 5 Christofferson introduced O'Connor as a figure of integrity and courage at Madison Square Garden two weeks later. She was booed.
He was supposed to leave the stage. He didn't.

Speaker 5 He stood with her and like supported her while she was performing.

Speaker 8 So, hey, I have a joke.

Speaker 10 Okay, great.

Speaker 11 Finally.

Speaker 5 Chris Christopherson arrives in heaven. Okay.
Who does he see? He sees Sinead O'Connor.

Speaker 5 Chris is like, hey, Sinead. Sinead's like, hey, Chris.
That's nice. Sinead O'Connor's like, you want to come beat up the Pope with me? Okay.
I do it every day. And Chris Christoverson's very confused.

Speaker 5 He's like, Wait, what do you mean, the Pope? I'm surprised to see the Pope here. I wouldn't have thought he would have gotten into heaven.

Speaker 5 And Sinead O'Connor's like, this isn't his heaven this is our heaven ah oh and then ruth bader then then ruth bader ginsburg comes in and goes wakanda forever all right now i'm on 40 right all right huh i thought it was good

Speaker 5 i like chris chris doverson the singer was also famously known on love it or leave it as someone i thought had died already yes famously so the lowly curse strikes again is the same thing that happened to Costum Solomani.

Speaker 5 Yikes.

Speaker 5 Turns out I was actually thinking of Toby Keith, who reportedly had an altercation with Chris Chris Doverson during a Willie Nelson birthday concert, recorded in a 2009 Rolling Stone profile, written, of course, by Ethan Hawk.

Speaker 5 Keith allegedly told Chris Dofferson, an army veteran, not to play that quote, lefty shit during a set. This pissed Christofferson off, who screamed at him, have you ever served your country?

Speaker 5 The answer is no, you have not. Have you ever killed another man? Have you ever taken another man's life and then cashed the check your country gave you for doing it? No, you have not.

Speaker 5 So shut the fuck up. Sorry, Toby, but you just got dissed offerson.

Speaker 5 Kostofferson later said he had no memory of the incident though admitted his wife did and in some ways that's even cooler the singer was 88 leaves behind eight children and seven grandchildren he will be miss mustofferson

Speaker 5 All right, before we go, it is time to sit back, relax, and enjoy an ice cold glass of Heinz ketchup because Love It Relieve It is headed to beautiful Pittsburgh at the Roxyan Theater.

Speaker 5 We'll be there on Friday, October 4th. We'll help take the edge off the last few laps for Election Day with Mateo Lane, hilarious comedian, the playwright R.

Speaker 5 Eric Thomas returns, and PA's own congressional candidate, Janelle Stelson. We want the Roxyan to be as stuffed with lowly fans as your sandwiches are stuffed with french fries.

Speaker 5 So please grab your tickets now at crooked.com slash events. We're very excited.
I'm very excited to go back to Pittsburgh. That show's almost sold out.
So last chance, get those tickets.

Speaker 5 Also, make sure you're subscribed to our daily news pod, What A Day to get a recap of the vice presidential debate.

Speaker 5 You can wake up first thing tomorrow and hear a 20-minute overview of the highs and lows of the Walls Vance Showdown or head to What A Days YouTube for the video version. That's our show.

Speaker 5 Thank you so much to Hallie, Sarah, and Kendra.

Speaker 5 Once again, you can go to votesaveamerica.com/slash Helene to support our Helene fund that is sending money to groups on the ground doing good work.

Speaker 5 The team has vetted and is adding organizations to make sure that we're sending the money to the places that are going to do the most good. So, votesaveamerica.com/slash Helene.

Speaker 5 And with that, see you slots on Saturday.

Speaker 5 believe it.

Speaker 5 Straight shoot taught,

Speaker 5 love it, or live it, it's loving, or leaving

Speaker 5 Straight on all sides,

Speaker 5 loving or living, it's loving, or leaving.

Speaker 5 Straight shoot tie,

Speaker 5 loving or living, it's loving, or leaving.

Speaker 5 Love It or Leave It is a crooked media production. It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, and Lee Eisenberg.

Speaker 5 Kendra James is our executive producer, Chris Lord is our producer, and Kennedy Hill is our associate producer.

Speaker 5 Hallie Kiefer is our head writer, Sarah Lazarus and Jocelyn Kaufman, Peter Miller, Alan Pierre, Quill Miles, and Mohanad El Shiki are our writers. Evan Sutton is our editor.

Speaker 5 Kyle Seglund and Charlotte Landis provide audio support. Stephen Cologne is our audio engineer.
And Milo Kim is our videographer. Our theme song is written and performed by SureSure.

Speaker 5 Thanks to our designer Bernardo Cerna for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast.

Speaker 5 And to our digital producers, David Toles, Claudia Shang, Mia Kelman, and Matt DeGroat for filming and editing video each week so you can.

Speaker 5 Let's love it. We'll leave it.

Speaker 5 Speaking of two perfect tens, the vice presidential debate is headed our way. Well, that's sort of mean to Tim.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna sneeze. Hold on.

Speaker 9 Speaking of two men, I'd fuck.

Speaker 9 Oh, yeah, take your time with that sneeze, brother.

Speaker 16 Really lean into it.

Speaker 1 What the fuck?

Speaker 9 Just enjoy it.

Speaker 17 Just a sumptuous sneeze.

Speaker 5 I'm not trying to drag it out.

Speaker 8 It's not going to.

Speaker 11 Look at the light.

Speaker 5 That makes it go away.

Speaker 12 No, that makes it go faster.

Speaker 5 Well, now it's done.

Speaker 20 What's poppin' listeners? I'm Lacey Mosley, host of the podcast Scam Goddess, the show that's an ode to fraud and all those who practice it.

Speaker 20 Each week I talk with very special guests about the scammiest scammers of all time. Want to know about the fake heirs? We got them.
What about a career con man? We've got them too.

Speaker 20 Guys that will wine and dine you and then steal all your coins. Oh, you know they are represented because representation matters.

Speaker 20 I'm joined by guests like Nicole Beyer, Ira Madison III, Conan O'Brien, and more. Join the congregation and listen to Scam Goddess wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 4 A massage chair might seem a bit extravagant, especially these days. Eight different settings, adjustable intensity, plus it's heated and it just feels so good.

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Speaker 4 suddenly it seems quite practical. The Volkswagen Tiguan, packed with premium features like available massaging front seats, it only feels extravagant.