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Who's Preston?

The editor.

That's not true.

We're on a thread with him.

I don't think that's true.

He sends a lot of gifts.

Proof!

You know who he is.

No, I don't.

You like him?

I don't even know who he is.

He's one of the few people you like.

If I liked him,

wouldn't I know who he is?

At this point, I don't even know.

I don't even know what to say anymore.

You're listening to the dollop on

All Things Comedy Network.

This is an American History podcast where each week I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to my failure.

Gareth Reynolds.

Ow, who has no idea what the topic is going to be about?

Should I move my camera over a little bit more?

What you're.

My solo.

Yeah, well, turn your chair a little bit.

You can just turn into it, maybe.

No, yeah, you're right.

No, there you are.

But I like looking at you.

Should I just

looking at me, then yeah, maybe change it.

I'm going to change it.

Van.

So this week,

somehow I switched the files

on the baseball fight episode to a pastimes one, and that's been fixed.

So if you downloaded the last episode, the baseball fight, and it was a pastimes episode, that has been rectified.

Don't know what I did.

I shouldn't do it late at night when I'm tired.

And drunk.

You know,

by 11 p.m.,

I'm six bottles.

Last time.

Six bottles of gin.

Last time you got drunk.

Drunk?

Like, drunk?

Drunk?

Oh, boy, that's a tough one.

Tour?

Yeah, probably last time I was on tour somewhere with you.

I don't really get drunk.

Drink?

Yeah, like I, you know, on 4th of July to celebrate our great nation, I had like three beers.

I really, when I was like at home that night, not

watching fireworks, we both talked about how stupid we now think fireworks are.

Yeah.

For so many, like they've been dumb.

There's certain things that all of a sudden you're like, wait, what?

Well, because when I was growing up, every town didn't do them, and now every town does them.

I also think it used, like,

there was like,

you know, it was like you had access to them less in general.

They weren't like, they go off after in Universal's City Walk, they go off four or five times a day.

Like you used to be, it used to be a rare.

Should we be doing this on the chollop?

Yeah, probably.

Go to our Patreon, patreon.com, the dollop.

Go see us on tour.

Yeah, go see us on tour.

You can go to the dolloppodcast.com.

And look at the tour dates.

We're doing a bunch of Midwest dates in October.

Are you okay?

Which runs before this anyway, all the dates.

Oh, right.

Well, go see us.

Go to the dolloppodcast.com.

I think that's it.

No other news.

Join our Patreon.

Yeah, I don't know.

I think that's it.

We're the bad boys.

We've been the bad boys for a while.

We love it when people throw dolls on stage.

You're the doll heads.

We love that.

I think that's everything.

People got mad because I told people to wear masks.

At what?

They were like, well, some places you can't do that.

Okay.

Well, nowhere you can't do that.

Also, when I'm talking about you're in your car

and

an ICE is filming you, that's not actually a protest.

You're in your car.

So you can't put on a mask in your car.

My video was about being in your car and ICE filming your face.

So you're not in a protest if you're in your car.

I like this relationship.

The commenters on the other side.

You just read all these people and it's like, man, you're hitting fascism just become ungovernable.

That's it.

Fuck your laws.

It's all off.

Can I wear a clown outfit?

Yeah, we were hoping you would.

I think it's time.

Yeah.

The pedals are hard with the the shoes may i wear flip-flops yeah and i could just do clown the rest i would paint the flip-flops red

well the flip-flops are you saying paint my exposed feet red too no you can no that's may i may i paint my exposed feet yeah okay thank you thank you very much Okay, all right, now I'm ready to start.

So this is an episode that we did during the online times, and since this fella just died, we're redoing it.

By the way, if you like redo episodes, patreon.com, We do redo's.

Yeah,

this was just for online people.

It was never released publicly.

March 15th, 1935, year of our Lord J-Town.

Jimmy Lee Swaggart was born in Faraday, Louisiana.

Seven months later, his cousin Jerry Lee Lewis was born in the same town.

Oh, God.

No, right.

This isn't about Jerry Lee Lewis, obviously.

No.

He just makes an appearance.

Now, at that point, was he trying to date his baby cousin?

Well, he was just born.

I know.

So, you think right away he was trying to date.

Well, his baby cousin wouldn't have been born yet.

So, his baby cousin wouldn't have been born yet.

He was just born.

He's a baby.

I don't.

He goes younger.

A layer of tissue is not going to stop my Jerry Lee.

He goes younger.

So he,

by your theory, he would be trying to date a sperm and an egg.

Now you got me.

You didn't have me before, but now you got me.

Jimmy Swaggart's mother was Minnie Bell.

Yeah.

Who was wrong?

That's a terrible name.

Oh, it's a great name.

They had another cousin, Mickey Gilly.

Now that's a bad name.

The Lewis Swaggart-Gilly clan was very poor, and Jimmy's father was a fiddle player and a Pentecostal preacher, Willie Leon.

What a job split.

Well, you got to work.

Fiddle and Pentecostal.

You got to make money at night.

That's some...

Which way?

He's fiddling at night?

Put down the snake, pick up the fiddle.

Yeah, there you go.

You know how to do it.

I agree.

Don't get them mixed up now.

No, you get them mixed up.

You get him mixed up.

You're looking for it.

Yeah, it's gonna be a bit bad.

They lived in a part of town with

bad land for growing crops.

Okay, imagine.

So they're barely able to grow enough food to get by.

A lot of people in the family played music.

Okay.

Musical family, much like the Jacksons.

I don't need you to cite other families that were.

I I understand the concept, so I don't need to go.

The Osmonds.

Right.

The Kelly family.

Almonds.

Very good.

They were nuts, though.

I'm sorry.

That was...

Cut it.

They,

sorry, I said that.

Very religious.

Very, very religious family.

When

Jerry's family got him a piano, the three cousins would gather and play it together.

I think there's something to be said for the ultra-rich embrace religion and the uber poor will embrace religion.

Other people obviously go towards it, but it's ways of fathoming the oddity of your life.

Don't you think?

I always think that with athletes.

When like if a guy can throw a football 70 yards, he's like, I believe in God.

I mean, look what I'm doing.

Well, some do, some don't.

There's a lot of guys that can throw a football or hit a baseball and are like,

there's a lot.

A lot that do.

Yeah, but there's a lot that I really think there are a lot that don't also.

Baseball, at least.

They should have their own huddle before the game.

But you can't.

We don't believe in anything.

You can't really separate sports from

religion because, you know, the middle,

sports are so popular in religious places.

Texas.

Yes.

Et cetera.

Yes.

What about that one season where John Kittna turned the whole Detroit Lions team Christian?

And then GM was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on.

What are you talking about?

I love when there's a coach that

basically makes the whole team be religious.

Yeah, right.

It happens in college a lot.

You're like, by the way, we're all praying now.

Okay, back to this nonsense.

At eight, Jimmy had a revelation from God.

Okay.

A lot of us do that at eight or nine.

It's a pretty common childhood moment.

He's in line in a movie theater, and God told him not to go in.

I thought he was going to be like, don't go see

sinners.

Don't go see sinners.

Go see singing in the rain.

Quote, the Lord spoke to me.

I know that sounds funny.

It was not an audible voice or anything of that nature, but I sensed it and felt it in my heart.

The Lord said, Don't go in there, but give me your heart.

I want to save your soul and set you apart as a chosen vessel used in my service.

It's just a guy behind him.

You're up.

I always say this when I'm in line.

I just said, sorry.

Jimmy ignored it and he stayed in line.

Interesting.

And then he was killed by lightning.

No.

That's it.

That's the end of the story.

When he put his quarter in the ticket machine, it jammed.

What is that?

It's the Lord.

It's certainly following the needle.

Quote, then I heard the Lord again.

I finally got my quarter and left.

He gave him the quarter back.

Well, he must have, or he got it back from an employee.

So they had a ticket machine that you put a quarter into?

Yeah, these are different times.

Who knows?

What happened to the person you buy the ticket?

Well, this is before that whole system.

This is when it was a quarter.

It was like easy.

We're going back to that version.

Yeah, we are.

That's AI.

Put your money in.

Yeah, right.

Just put your money in and eliminate the human.

So that's a bullshit story that he tells.

As they got older, Mickey and Jerry turned to music.

Jerry was expelled from his church for playing a rock version of My God Is Real.

That I get.

That you get.

That's interesting.

Stay straight up.

Keep your fucking rock out of my church.

Yeah, okay.

Little creep.

What do you get?

See, here's the thing about you rock guys.

You start out rocking and rolling.

It's sex music.

And next thing you know, you're banging your

cuss.

Stop talking.

Your underage cousin.

excuse me that's very well let's see if my idea of bringing rock into a church plays out i think you've i think you've cheated the system because i think you've just i think you've put out your evidence knowing the verdict all of the people who told him to get his rock music out of their church when he started banging his cousin were all like i told you but he got it out of the church so wouldn't that be a case for why he shouldn't he have not done that he shouldn't be doing the rock music play the rock of the church i bet he done cousin fuck how about that

catch me outside absolutely grotesque catch me outside

so jimmy was more into preaching and at 17 he dropped out of high school and married frances anderson for anderson for anderson she is 15.

look

how old is he

i mean

he's 17 so it's two years it's not that bad that's that's pretty look we're not again we're not gonna i'll tell you a position that ages poorly yeah you know pro uh teenage marriage fucking but uh yeah, but as far as the egregious things we've heard on this show.

But look,

17 and 15

is a pretty common thing.

Particularly

in high school now, it's a common thing.

Although they don't do that now, they do one year off, at least in my kids' school.

Oh.

But, which is crazy to me.

But

you can't go senior freshmen.

That one did creep me out.

Yeah, that creeps me out.

Well, now that I've, now that my kids in high school, I'm like, oh, yeah, no, freshmen shouldn't be in high school.

They should be in middle school because a lot of them them are still tiny.

Yeah, I was.

But

15 and 17,

girls are more mature.

Yeah.

So a 17-year-old dude is almost like a 15-year-old girl.

Like brainwashed.

Right, yeah, right.

anyway, that's not that bad.

We've seen a lot worse.

Way worse.

And we're going to see a lot worse in this story.

All right.

Rock and roll.

Yeah.

Jimmy later described her as, quote, not pregnant.

It's nice to be sweet and say cool, nice things.

she's great you love her she's not pregnant

you'd love her she's got so much good stuff well what is she like oh my god

she has

long brown hair

she's not pregnant

she's not pregnant yeah no it's not from a lack of nothing

well i wish i hadn't said that she has curly hair And it's kind of wavy.

Uh-huh.

I've gone in the butt.

She is not pregnant.

Jimmy, I feel like we should see.

Nobody's had less of a fetus in her than

her.

Nobody's had less of a fetus in them than her.

I gotta be honest, as your preacher, I did not expect.

And the Lord said such revelations when I asked you to...

Finish the job outside.

Simple question.

I spilleth my seed on the tummy pool.

I am both uncomfortable and excited.

Can you paint?

I would like a picture.

Nah, I think I did.

She's got brown hair.

She's not at all pregnant.

Yeah.

That does sound like

a Trump non-sequitur.

So in 1955, he gave his first sermon in front of a grocery store.

Absolutely.

It's just like the people are just outside yelling about God.

Yeah, you have to wonder if God would be like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

No.

Yeah.

Not what I was.

I actually don't want you bothering everybody.

That's annoying.

That sounds fucking crazy.

Yeah, we're not.

We're not as.

So what?

You just got a huge plank of plywood and just painted it green and then wrote on it and then laminated it.

Yeah.

And now you're just carrying it eight feet above your head.

Yeah.

It's an eyesore.

Yeah, but people get it.

I don't think they do.

You're not helping the cause.

I think people get it.

Do me a favor.

You do me a favor.

Excuse me.

Yeah.

No.

Sorry.

You are not doing that.

Sorry.

Start fundraising a little bit.

That's a good way to do it.

Oh.

I don't like you just co-opting a block.

God needs money.

No, no, no, no.

Don't put it like that.

God needs money.

No, to help the infirmed.

For the abortion.

Excuse me.

I knocked her up.

Excuse me.

So, yeah.

So in front of a grocery store, he played an accordion to draw crowds in, which always works.

Always works.

Yeah, that's how you do it.

You've heard that before?

Yeah.

So, but that's accordion to who?

They had a son, Donnie, in 1954.

Jerry Lee became famous in 1957 with his first

big rock hit, Whole Lot of Shaking Going On.

Big one.

That means fucking.

Yeah, it does.

Because rock back then was all about, you know.

Yeah, insinuative fucking.

Yeah.

So Jimmy was singing the gospel at this point, and Jerry Lee falls into drugs and alcohol, and Jimmy spoke out against

Jerry Lee's wayward life.

Okay.

You know, his cousin.

He's really gosh.

He's off the path.

Yeah, he's way off the fucking path.

Quote, Jerry Lee can go to Sun Records in Memphis.

I'm on my way to heaven with a God who supplies all my need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Well, I mean, you got to pick.

What do you want?

You know, do you want the party now or later?

No.

Yes, that's how I feel.

Now's the party.

Absolutely.

Especially with the repent loophole.

Yeah, seriously.

You can just wait till the last minute and then flip that switch.

And just be like, hey, my bad.

Why would you?

That's sort of a loophole that they leave open by allowing people to convert at the end.

Yeah.

Because

it does set up a more bright, sinful world because there are some that believe you have to live a whole

holy life, right?

Yeah.

There are some.

You might have to go to purgatory.

You go to purgatory.

Yeah, I wouldn't mind it.

I mean, especially if I know, like, after I'm taking the elevator, but I'm going to give somebody.

I don't want to go to the place where the religious people are.

You'd, buddy,

whatever.

You're going to get, then you get your own section.

It's like smoking or non.

I don't think that is.

It's very much a smoking or none.

Okay.

And you're sure?

I'm pretty sure.

I'm pretty sure it's a smoking or non.

So, by the 60s, Jimmy is preaching all over the southeast, recording gospel albums, and gets a radio show.

Okay.

So, he is fucking killing it.

He's also on the radio.

Yeah, him and his cousin are killing it.

And he's doing it the pious way.

So, at a show in Ohio, Jerry is so high on drugs that he can't play.

So, Jerry is very off

all of it.

It's not like he's just doing rock.

He's shaking, he's killing.

Yeah.

I mean, that's, that's one way people respond to oppressive religion.

You know, go the other way with it.

Here we go.

That's how I do it.

Straight to anal.

So Jimmy carried him off stage, quote, Jerry Lee is my cousin and I love him.

And I think that you know I love him and I've come to take him home.

I assume he thought he was going to save him at this point, right?

Yeah, right.

Like he was going to find Jesus and off they go.

Yeah, he's just going to wake up like dehydrated.

I wish there were pictures of him carrying him.

I want to see him carry a grown man.

I like that.

I like that for you.

He did it like

over the back, or you think like a bride crossing the uh i love a drag dragging him.

I love an arm first drag, okay, or a foot-first drag.

Yeah, foot-first drag.

But you got to think of the head.

So I like an arm first.

What about a head drag?

Drag?

That's wrestling.

That's that's different.

That's a that's uh

different energy.

Jerry Lee continued his life, and then things completely fell apart for Jerry Lee when he married his 13-year-old cousin.

He's 22.

Now we can be outraged.

That's not as bad as a 17-15.

22 to 13.

Well,

she's a child.

That's a child.

She's a child.

That's a man and a child.

Yes.

And a cousin.

That's right.

You know it's bad when you're not even paying attention to the cousin part.

But you know her so well.

It's horrible.

Because you've been around her a lot.

Not cool.

As a child, and now she's barely on the cusp of adulthood.

I'll tell you.

And you are ready because you're 22 and on drugs.

I remember when my ex, I was at her family's place for her.

I was at her family's place for the weekend, and they put on her birth video to watch it with joy.

Nope.

And I'll tell you, it threw me for a goddamn loop for a little while.

Nope.

You don't, you don't.

I was a baby dater.

Did we see the baby come out of the no, but we saw everything but we saw like right after.

How old was she?

At the time?

at the time yeah oh i don't know we were i don't know 29

but i was like it was just like through i was like i'm dating that baby yeah no

yeah it's weird yeah i was sitting there later like i gotta go i got some real stuff to think about i'm a piece of

dating a baby you are a piece of david uh so his career basically it's over is it really over it's over yeah which is surprising at that time honestly because he did great balls of fire a whole lot of of shaking going on.

You know, and then, you know, he was a big, big rock, one of the biggest rock stars.

Yeah, he was a big piano guy.

You would think that people would be like, yeah, 22, 13, but I guess not.

What do you mean?

Like, yeah, pro?

Yeah.

People would be fine with it.

At that time, what year would be 50s?

60s.

60s, yeah.

Jimmy's congregation is growing.

He's becoming more famous.

He put out albums, which you probably still have.

I have a bunch of them.

He now had a small church in Baton Rouge.

He called the Family Worship Center.

I remember it.

But he wants more.

Of course, he does.

He bought a small AM radio station.

And in 1971, he began broadcasting on small TV stations in Baton Rouge.

Yeah.

So TV.

TV.

Let's go.

Big.

Baton Rouge.

Televangelism was on the rise, and Jimmy leaned into TV.

And in 1973, he went into business with producers who syndicated his show across the United States.

And by the 80s, he was on over 3,000 stations.

It's so weird because I did grow up, like I grew up obviously in this time of like watching it and always just being like, what the fuck is going on?

Yeah, it was alien to us.

But even as someone who was not religious, I was like, this is crazy.

Yeah, I, I, yeah.

To me, it's always like.

Like having it on TV was crazy.

Yeah, to me, it's always, it's always like, there's religion, okay, fine.

But then

watching a guy on TV and giving him money to me is fucking crazy.

Like, now I'm just like, you're out of your fucking trade.

Like, but watching, like,

like going, like, I would be like, oh, okay.

I, like, I don't get going to it, but I'd be like, I understand you like it.

It does not translate to, it'd be like watching Hacky Sack live.

Like,

that's like, there's a story

for the Hacky Sack shows.

he's making a lot of money.

He's famous.

He now had high-level donors.

Zoe McDonald Vance was a very wealthy, three-times widowed woman.

And she had a multi-million dollar California beach home.

She wasn't really religious, but she started watching Jimmy in 1978.

What was he doing?

You get sucked in.

Oh, this is good.

Wow, this guy's amazing.

This is why cable needed to happen.

Yeah.

Just because, wow.

i yeah and then he started uh doing uh and then she started going to his crusades so she gets drawn in she's like all right i'm gonna go see this guy live it's like it it's like uh for you guns and roses

by the way my brother went and saw uh lamb of god play ozzy's last show yesterday looked pretty amazing on video he said he said that Lamb of God kicked fucking ass.

He said there were a few that just fucking analyzed it, but Lamb of God one of them.

By the way, by the time this comes out,

Randy

is meeting my mother for tea, and he's surprising his girlfriend with the tea.

Sure.

So that's happening tomorrow.

But during Guns N' Roses, my brother was like, that's when I walked out for five minutes.

He's like, what is happening?

Well, the band is fine.

Axel's at it was fucking.

Well, Axel's unfortunately

the band now.

So it's like...

Oh, the other guys weren't there?

I don't know who else was there.

No, they were there.

Axel's not the band.

Well, he was for ages.

No, but for like 30 years, he's like, I'm retooling.

And then he'd come out every now and then and people would be like, yeah, are those worms on your hand?

He made them all sign

giving away the name of the band

or else he'd start a riot.

So they did.

But then they've been touring together as a band for

like eight years.

I didn't know.

They have, they, they, they are separate, so they have separate entrances

and they go into separate green rooms.

And then so weird.

And then he

in the contract.

I would love that.

In the contract, he gets to play a certain amount of Chinese democracy songs.

And it's hilarious because if you're at a show, as soon as he starts singing his Chinese democracy song, every phone comes out in the entire show.

Oh, yeah, I bet.

And no one pays attention.

I bet.

But Duff, when he plays

Duff, yeah.

When he plays a punk song, everybody's into it.

Interesting.

But they don't even know.

So they all get to play a little.

Like, no one's into Axel's bullshit.

uh anyway.

Uh,

she starts going to his crusades, and uh, Jimmy goes to her home and he baptizes her in the ocean, like I did with you.

And he's you held me down for so long,

seven minutes, seven minutes, and I just always remember it.

Everything I've seen, it's a quick dunk, yeah, but it can be more you get more God for the longer you're under.

I know, but I

really lost two people I wanted to know.

Part of my brain stopped working.

Two people I wanted to baptize.

Two parts that knew history.

Before that, I was big into it.

I knew a ton of history.

You held me under seven minutes.

I thought Ben Franklin was a president.

I really wanted to.

You I wanted to baptize, but I also really, really wanted to baptize Russell Brand.

That's like a 10-minute baptism for me.

Yeah, that one I actually understand.

Yeah.

Oh, Crocky, you've held me under for a long time, haven't you?

Yeah, you're good.

That's a vile.

I don't even know what's happening there.

It sounds.

It's just like him.

You didn't nail that one.

It must be nice to just sit there it is be simon cowell act it is

well you say spicy meataball spicy meat bottle

her sister sued

oh sorry she died in 1981 did i leave that part out yeah and then she leaves she leaves she made a ton of money nice so her sister sues and as the the estate was supposed to all go to kidney disease research

so vance's only son died of kidney disease 16.

So, that's why she was like,

originally supposed to.

Yeah.

So, the court battle went on for two years, and then they finally settled, and Jimmy got 70%.

Pretty good.

I mean, those were her wishes.

Those are her wishes.

Yeah, yeah, whatever.

Those are her wishes.

The rest went to the Kidney Foundation.

That's nice.

They got something.

And so, Jimmy now

got family oil land in Texas.

Oh, I didn't realize it was oil land.

And he was now making $100,000 a month from oil.

Oh, fuck me.

It's an American story right here.

Wow.

He only had to use the money

for children's ministries.

I think that was a stipulation.

He had to use it for child ministries.

I like how that's like better to like, and I want to be very discerning.

Brainwashed.

It can only be for the very young.

Brainwatch the young.

The very young must be indoctrinated into this.

What a crazy.

I hate to be it.

Sorry, Jimmy.

You've got a flock, but this is for babies.

Yeah, well, I really want you.

This is for the babies.

Just get your crazy in a little, little kids' mindset.

Okay, let's, let's, excuse me, excuse me.

I want to be careful after talking to my family and my council.

This is for toddlers.

This is a toddler church.

On October 26, 1984, a 19-year-old teenager who suffered from depression was drunk and shot himself in Indio, California.

His parents blamed Ozzy Osborne and his song Suicide Solution.

They said it had hidden messages, had suicide messages.

If you're going to go that route, it doesn't sound too hidden.

You can just go the direct route.

Like, I mean, the song title is if you're going to make the case.

Not hidden at all.

If you think about it.

I think it feels like it was pretty overt.

I was just trying to say, up front, there's an impression for you.

Now, suck balls.

Okay, now do Ozzy in 1984.

1984?

84.

No, he wasn't like that in 84.

I was a lot more like this.

Okay, no.

You just ruined the fun.

You ruined the fun.

You know what I heard?

You know what I heard the other day was

an Irish

preacher, but he had the cadence of Viat.

Well, you actually heard that or that was.

I heard that.

Oh, my God.

So he's just like, destroyed.

The Lord is come.

And he's a maker.

Oh my God.

It's amazing.

I was like, that'd be one I would stick my teeth into.

Yeah.

So the family sues Ozzy and Ozzy's like, there's no hidden messages.

It's a song about alcoholism and a musician friend who drank himself to death.

So the court.

Has anyone ever been an Ozzy Osborne again?

So the court.

Dismissed the case.

Okay.

And Ozzy became a regular target of Jimmy, however.

Okay.

So the televangelist industry was very tight-knit.

Marvin Gorman was another international televangelist phenomena guy from Louisiana.

Full disclosure, I did tour with Gorman for a few years.

Yeah.

I kind of probably should just

maybe just step out for this part of the story.

I'm a Gorm again.

Yeah, and your album was called Gorman Again, right?

Gorman Again.

Yep.

Gorman Again and Again.

A minister nearby, David Savage, asked Reverend Gorman to counsel his wife, Linda.

Because, look, if you're having marital issues, the best guy to go to is another like con man to work with her.

Absolutely.

Uh,

and so Gorman and Savage are friends, so he counsels Linda.

And on December 28th, 1978, she calls and she's in a hotel and she's thinking about committing suicide.

Okay, she must have had Ozzie on.

So, Gorman rushes over.

The door is ajar.

Just say open.

Stop it.

And no, it's actually a jar.

Oh.

Yeah.

That's strange.

And Linda is on the bed in a bathrobe.

Oh, Christ.

And there's a spilled bottle of pills.

And Gorman sits beside her,

you know, because

this is scary.

And then she...

She pulls off her robe

and they start kissing.

Oh, God.

Now, hold on.

Gorman said he did not disrobe.

He did not disrobe.

No, he did not.

He did not take off his clothes.

But he did pull his dog out.

What the fuck?

Nobody needs your nipples.

This is how you do it.

This is not how you do it.

And then they started having sex.

She's all pilled out on the death story.

He got the Johnson out.

Oh, my God.

And I remain clothed.

Except for the dong.

The dong did drop out for a while.

For a long time.

But he lost his heart on Midway because of the guilt.

Oh my God.

Let me tell you, that's the only part of the story that's not real.

I lost my boner after it comes.

Oh, everything has to be done with that cadence.

I do like that setup.

But yeah.

I was a trying, and I couldn't afford this.

Okay.

I dug as deep as I could.

My bones were rubbing my zipper because I kept my clothes on.

Yeah, there's no way he didn't.

He fucking blew his load and then he was like, oh, now it's not working anymore.

That is so...

That, that,

I mean, obviously that's rape.

No, because she, she, no, she's trying to seduce him.

Oh, she is?

Yeah, clearly.

You're being funny.

No.

She, she took, she took the, they were sitting down together and she took the robe off.

Oh, but I thought you said she was surrounded by pills.

Well, there were spilled pills on the table, but she, she may have been inebriated, but she also

sat down next to him and took her robe off.

She she was unconscious yeah okay i was picturing a different thing i don't love it either way to be honest i'm not if i walked into that situation i don't think it would end with well you need to go to church more you know you're so right this is what it you're so right it's what god wants you're so right i just i keep

yeah there's this whole yeah

so he loses his boner and then he begs for forgiveness and then he leaves.

He's upset because he's cheating on his wife or he's taking another man's wife.

Yes, both, I think.

So he asked God for forgiveness also.

Okay.

And quote.

You're good, dude.

Dude, you lost your boner halfway through.

Under the blood of Jesus, his sin was forgiven.

Yeah.

Hey, hey, hey, look.

Quit crying, dude.

You're all good.

Hey, you're all good.

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey, shh,

shh.

You lost your boner, dude.

This is, hey, listen, this is Jesus.

First of all, I forgive you.

And secondly,

I want you to take me through it.

Hey, I'll handle it.

I want you to take me through it

real slow.

Boy, boy.

Take me through it.

Boy.

I'm going to take my Jesus dick out.

Boy, boy.

What?

Boy, out.

Go to your...

Sorry.

Go to your planet.

The Mormons were right.

Jesus, go to your planet.

That's it, boy.

Go to your planet.

So he doesn't need to tell anyone because Jesus forgave him.

Right.

So then you can keep it a secret.

He kept counseling the savages.

So he continues.

Well, definitely.

Look,

he's already started the process.

Save the marriage.

So keep him in the fold.

And he keeps banging Linda.

Well, now that.

Okay.

I'm like, you don't want her to be alone.

You want her to

be able to take in the message.

You want her to be satisfied and happy and

feeling good

physically.

Quote, during counseling sessions he indicated to her that she had a sexual dysfunction and she needed to learn how to climax and he would teach her that so there you go now that i've pulled i've pulled that one before that one i

that one i've pulled uh it's worked twice but uh you have it and then the best part is you don't make them come well uh

yeah i don't know you're kind of fucked i guess i don't know

it's totally a you thing if i can't do it if i can't do it then nobody can i don't know what to tell you

uh she also had sex with her brother-in-law and the church music minister.

Linda likes to fuck.

By the way.

So let her fuck.

Look,

if you're looking to cheat, go with the guy who plays with the organ all day.

But also, just Linda, have a good time.

Yeah, I agree.

She also had sex with her brother-in-law.

Oh, I did that.

And the church music minister.

Do it again slower.

And a son nine and had a son nine months after having sex with Gorman and her husband on the same day.

So she doesn't know who the father is.

But you'll find out as they grow up.

Yeah, I like that patient waiting.

Yeah.

Oh, look at his lobes.

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No.

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So, in 1986,

in 1986, Linda is consumed with guilt

Because she's been fucking everybody.

Oh, right, right, right.

She fucked everyone in the church.

And she makes a confession to Reverend Michael Indest.

He's on the other side.

Like, are you still looking to do that?

What are we doing right now?

Do you mind if I take my organ out during this?

Is this?

I'm not going to get naked, but do you mind if I play with it?

Are you hitting on me right now?

No.

Well, I have something to confess.

This is a two-way street.

May I also confess?

Yeah.

I've been masturbating during your confession.

Oh, my God.

So have I.

Oh, my God.

Because

it was illegal to tape it in Louisiana,

he gave the video to Jimmy.

Did I mention that he

taped it?

No.

He videoed the confession?

Wouldn't you?

That is an app.

What is it, the real world?

It was an absolute nightmare.

So now Jimmy

gets the video and he confronts Gorman.

And

Gorman was like, holy fuck, that is very damning.

He confessed,

denied there were others.

Jimmy and David Savage accuse Gorman of having sex with another woman, Lynette Goh.

They said Gorman admitted it.

Now, Jimmy pretended he wanted to help Gorman, but he really wanted to end his career, which would open, yeah, because then that's the audience that he can just pick up.

Jimmy spread the word of the affairs, and he says that Gorman had hundreds of affairs.

Oh, wow.

So he.

And Gorman left the church in July of 18 of 1986.

He gets defrocked a month later.

He's ruined.

Jimmy took him out.

Yeah, okay.

Gorman would start up a new tiny church in a New Orleans

in New Orleans.

Finger puppets.

In a warehouse.

So that's not that tiny.

It's not terrible.

But it's tiny in numbers, I think.

Sure, compared to what he was doing.

It's always, you can't start a new church in a warehouse because it's going to seem really empty at the start.

Yeah.

I mean, it's, yeah, it's kind of a bringer.

You bring it, you have a drape halfway through, yeah.

A curtain that you're calling

that I'll have at the Irvine Improvin's Saturday night late late show shame curtain.

So now the big rival is Jim Baker.

Nice.

And he is, he was friends with Gorman.

Okay.

So Jim and Tammy Baker's PTL club is broadcast across the U.S.

PTO.

PTL.

Okay.

What does that stand for?

Parents and Teachers Are Lit.

Yeah, okay.

That's what I thought.

And

they had a multi-million dollar empire.

Their former chief of security, quote, we had a cash office, and at times there was certainly more money in it than I could imagine.

People would send us mink coats, diamond rings, and deeds.

When you hear this sort of shit, you really, it all, Trump makes so much sense in a way.

It's just kind of the evolution of this like,

I'll do anything, I'll believe in anything to make sure that I'm going to be okay.

And just believing in the worst people.

the worst people.

You got to wonder, though, like.

This is going to sound like I host the PBS show, but is it, are you, is that your plan going into it?

Or are you formed when you see that level of success and money?

Like, I wonder if you're going in there being like, I'm going to defraud people.

Or I wonder if while you're doing your thing, you're going, ooh, I shouldn't defraud people.

No, you're going into it.

You're going into it.

Yeah, I think they know they're going to defraud people.

that's cool.

So they bought, the bakers bought.

2,300 acres in South Carolina to build a water park.

The bakery acre.

The Heritage, named Heritage USA.

Okay.

They're also preparing preparing to break down on a $100 million

ministry center, the Crystal Palace.

Fuck me.

In 18.

Sorry, I keep doing that.

In 1987, their security chief was with Tammy

when she began hallucinating and stripped.

She's stripped?

Yeah.

She didn't take her makeup off, though.

No, that would take too long.

It'd take a fire hose.

So what do you think she's on?

Stripping is very strange.

Is that booze?

Could be booze.

Yeah, because I mean, out of all of it, it feels it's either booze or some horror sort of hallucinogen.

Well, what do you think?

But I would think 87.

So, there could be, this could be ecstasy.

Could be.

I've never experienced that version of ecstasy, though.

I've never like it was more impure back then.

Yeah, I've had the impure one.

I guess I've had it.

It's seven years old.

I'm talking.

No, I was doing it.

I did it, Jerry Lewis.

Yeah, I don't know.

It's very strange.

I don't know.

I would say maybe booze.

Yeah, I think so.

Quote, and I couldn't believe.

Also, they're fucking like, you know, they're repressed.

Some of them just want to fucking bang.

And like, you know, there's a lot of it's real stifling.

Yeah.

Quote, and I couldn't believe I'm there by myself with this lady and she'd taken her clothes off.

And Tammy didn't do that kind of stuff around me.

We all knew she had some prescription drug problems.

Oh, there you go.

So her drugs.

Pills and booze.

Yeah, pills and booze.

Her drug problem hits the press.

Okay.

Tammy, quote, I just had no idea, Jim, that you couldn't mix over-the-counter drugs.

I had no idea.

So she took the hot take your clothes off drug,

which is,

I think they took it off.

Like, it's not over-the-counter anymore.

You got to buy it prescription.

Yeah, right.

But yeah, that was a big drug for a while.

I like that one.

Shortly after, the story of Jessica Hahn broke.

Oh, right.

Former church secretary, she said Jim Baker, I mean, he raped her.

Like if you read, if you read the story, he, he absolutely, it was, it's fucking, the story is so, like, it's textbook sex trafficking assault.

Like it's grooming into

just straight up, like it's textbook.

How old is she when that?

She's like young.

She's like 22 or something.

She's pretty young.

Baker says it's a consensual affair.

Out of this, Han became a celebrity.

Also, let's just, let's just not forget how gross our entire society is.

She posed for Playboy.

She's a freaking guest on Howard Stern.

She was in music videos.

No, it's fucking horrifying, man.

It really is now that we're

approaching the kind of out in the open coming out of America ending party.

You are those seeds that we've talked about for so long.

It's like, yeah, well, what do you expect?

I mean, we are a disgusting nothing culture who's purely motivated by spotlight and greed.

Yeah, and money.

But even then, when it was happening, I was just like, what the fuck?

This is so weird or gross.

Yeah, see,

I think it took me a while to be like, wait, what?

Well, I was 47.

I mean.

No, I remember.

Jim and Tammy.

I remember you were involved in all that.

I was.

Jim and Tammy decided to step down and hand the PTL over to Jerry Falwell.

Oh, fuck me.

What he didn't know at the time was the PTL was deep in debt and were spending over $2 million a month.

Spending $2 million a month.

They're probably paying tons of people.

They're probably, everyone's living lavishly.

They're building shit everywhere.

Like they're just, they're just like, the money will never stop.

Well, I mean, the beauty of the church is there's no tax.

What if you have, if you have a room, yeah, there's no tax.

And if you have a room full of fucking mink coats and cash, and like, of course you're going to.

Oh, yeah, you're the mob.

Falwell and the bankers fall out over the debt.

And Falwell accused Jim of being secretly gay, having several male relationships, and said Tammy gave him a long list of demands, including compensation to give Falwell full control of PTL.

So Jerry gets in there.

He's like, this is going to be sweet.

And then he's like, oh, my God, what a nightmare.

They're not even running their Conwell.

So they did do one good thing.

I guess so.

Hurt Jerry Falwell.

Yeah, that's all that matters.

the government looks into the ptl finances the bankers

like jeez what the fuck

the government has uh the bankers have multiple homes a private jet two rolls royces a mercedes-benz an air-conditioned dog house geez i'm the only purchase that makes sense yeah now i'm actually on that one i'm on the line okay well absolutely uh so jim is indicted on eight counts of mail fraud 15 counts of wire fraud and a count of conspiracy.

During the trial, the employee who collected data on PTL memberships, which were being oversold, fainted.

That's one way to do it.

What a great way to get out of court.

Yeah.

You know what?

Let's take a recess.

That's really, I think that man is dead.

A trial sketch artist, quote, when he fainted, a voice from the audience came up and said, oh, he's given his life to God.

Jim Baker's...

Shut up.

Jim Baker's attorney called Jim up.

Jim, Jim, as if there's going to be a miracle and he can bring him back to life.

Oh, like a doctor on the plane.

Jim, Jim,

Jim,

do you have anything you can do?

Like, do you have a magic glove or something you could rub on him?

Oh, God, they can't stop.

Jim, they can't ever stop.

They must have planned it.

They planned it.

They planned the whole fucking thing.

That guy pretended to faint, and then like, and then Jim will come up and save him, and the jury will be like, oh, my God, look at Jim's magic.

Sorry.

I didn't mean to distract from the trial.

I don't know if you anyway.

You were saying I had a

diamond cutlery.

Go ahead.

I'm sorry.

I just had to save that man's life.

So, Jim doesn't make it through the trial.

He has a psychotic break.

Bullshit.

He hides under his lawyer's couch, saying the reporters outside were giant bugs.

Well, if you're going to fake it.

They're bugs.

They're giant bugs.

Jim.

Jim the judge.

Oh, my God.

Look at them.

They're all big bugs.

That's just Tammy, Jim.

That's just Tammy.

I mean...

Yeah, they're trying everything.

They're trying all their fucking...

That is so, that's so close to I'm buying it.

I'm buying it?

The bugs.

Oh, it's so crazy that you'd be like, maybe this is real.

So you're like, oh.

I think it's fake, but then the bugs thing is so great that I'm like, maybe.

The bugs thing is pretty great.

Bugs is great.

Yeah.

Oh, no.

I can't go out there.

All those reporters are bugs.

Don't you understand?

Where am I going to go?

They're bugs.

Look at them.

They made a how.

They're coming to get me.

I can't go out there right now.

They're all bugs.

Yeah, all right.

They're bugs.

People will buy that.

Oh,

they want to take.

They're coming at me.

Look at them with their beady little eyes and their teeth.

Look at that one.

They're coming at me.

Oh, no.

He was committed to a psych ward until fit for trial.

I now know they were not bugs.

After 30 days in a correctional facility, I have learned they were no longer bugs.

Holy shit, are they not bugs?

They're not bugs.

Eventually.

That guy might be a bug.

Yeah, eventually he goes on trial and he was found guilty on all counts and given 45 years in prison and a $500,000 fine.

I fucking great about jail.

Fine-wise, at some point, it's not going to happen, but it would be great to get our shit together fine-wise.

What's the matter?

Nothing.

I just, nothing.

We should fine people like if they have millions of dollars that they've invested.

They'll never do it.

They're always like, it's $100.

Yeah, it's never a fine that justifies.

Never.

It's like, you've got to be bankrupting.

But 45 years in prison is great.

But, you know, you've seen him on TV.

He's on TV now.

Yeah, right.

how much time do you think he actually served?

Oh, God.

They're always disappointing.

Six?

Five.

Yeah.

That's fucking stupid.

Jail taught me that they were indeed bugs.

While he was in prison, Tammy filed for divorce and quickly married the contractor who had built Heritage USA.

Wow.

Who went to prison for bankruptcy fraud in the fallout of PTL?

Well, she's got a real good.

You might want to wait until the trial's over before you pick the replacement suitor.

Jimmy was one of the fiercest critics of Baker's fall from grace.

So he just jumps on every single fucking person.

Yep.

Every person that's slightly got any kind of crap.

Any biblical heat.

You're going to go in and say, I'm the good one.

They're the bad one.

Follow me.

He's Facebook.

He's got Facebook.

Yes.

But he knows all those people are so susceptible and they will just immediately jump shit.

They're looking for another, yep,

another

flower to fertilize.

That's right.

He called Baker, quote, a cancer on the body of Christ.

That's

really hard.

It's going hard.

That's yeah, that's that's that's that you remember that.

That sticks with you.

His A Chris Dalia, by the way.

Don't.

I just ate.

His new album is Cancer on the Body of Christ.

It's got him on the crucifix like,

we're one of the only shows that really is goes after Jalia.

Yes.

No, everyone shouldn't continue.

I should point out that Kyle Anderson, who was on the Pastimes, he made a Dalia dock that's incredible on YouTube called The Crystalia Problem.

Yeah, it's great.

It's really,

yeah, if you're a fan, it might be worth a watch.

Let's just say the only thing they came after him for was a music copyright.

With his big rivals gone, Jimmy can now become the top televangelist.

Finally, Attorney General Ed Meese had released his famous porn report.

By the way, I mean, I love the porn.

Do you go to porn report?

Yeah, I do.

They got great stuff.

It's a really

good stuff.

Did you just see the thing I posted?

So my wife likes to go on next door now just to read how crazy everybody is.

She better make sure you're logged out.

She sent me.

it's so goddamn funny.

Oh, God.

I have so many conversations here.

People.

Okay, so this woman in our neighborhood writes, good evening.

What's a relaxing hobby you enjoy after work?

And some lady, Janet writes, crocheting knitting.

And

Debbie writes secondlife.com.

Casey writes Gardening for Me and Edward writes Pornhub.

God bless you.

No, how does that work?

Are you able, do you have any idea who Edward is?

No, it's not.

It's fully anonymous.

But no, they put your first name and last name up on everybody is.

So we all know that Edward's like either a perv or hilarious.

He's hilarious.

You know who he is?

I don't know who he is, but that's he's just being funny.

Like, that's just.

Yeah, I would imagine he's being funny, but I would also imagine some people would be like, that's in poor taste.

Yeah.

Edward.

Edward is the king.

Edward's crushing it.

Edward won the king.

I wish I lived next door to Edward.

Yeah, we all do.

Okay, so

Edmis is.

I mean, people who aren't alive for this, it's so fucking crazy.

It's, it's, it's a thousands of pages report on porn by the fucking attorney general.

It's genuine, like everyone on the left and liberals were just like making, it's just crazy.

It's, it's genuinely insane.

It's a government report on porn.

It's insane.

Inside of it, inside in the report,

James Dobson said heavy metal was a form of porn.

And Jimmy ran with that.

Jesus Christ.

He said it wasn't just the music, but also rock magazines.

The only way you could try to thread that needle is that there's hot women in

like,

what year are we in?

We're in the 80s.

This is, I think it's the late 80s when this game was.

So like music videos are out.

So like you're seeing hot, hot, like attractive women

in music videos, as well as you're seeing

the rock stars are kind of glammed up so i'm not saying i'm like obviously i'm just saying

the

it's insane but music wise you cannot be like i'm gonna go jack off to led zeppelin well they're yeah they're just trying to tie it all together yeah they're trying to make it so that

take down everything that they view as anti-god or whatever and i'm definitely a lot of the metal guys were just like yeah okay i'll lean into the yeah i'll lean into the devil shit just because because it's you guys are fucking idiots yeah a shout out the devil and other

but there's definitely a lot of hot women are into metal so there's tons of hot women are on the scene uh

the jessica hahn was definitely in metal videos around the metal scene now what about because you were i don't know if people know that you were in a glam band called and the antidote antidote yeah and like you were doing a lot of you guys did a lot of shows on the sunset strip and stuff so what what the vibe at that time when it comes to this stuff, that must be kind of a vibe shifter for.

Well, when they started coming after us?

Well, like you're kind of, you know, you're lobbed in there with like all of the, you know,

you're on a list of those 20, 30 groups, and that's like the Sunset Strip crew.

And then they're, did you guys kind of galvanize around the fact that you felt kind of attacked from the right a little bit?

I don't know if galvanized the right word, but we, we, first of all, we thought our record sales would go up.

Did they?

Yeah, they did.

I mean, that's when I started taking the snake out of my anus on stage.

Right.

Which was like, you know, a nod to the bottom of

the wave and the thing.

And then sort of.

Yeah.

And that, but, but if memory serves, that when you started really pushing that during every song is when the sales did start to decline.

I mean,

you were going through what, two, three snakes a show?

Yeah, and a lot of them died.

Yeah.

Yeah, a lot of the snakes died.

Well, I don't know.

But it was fucking metal.

Yeah, yeah.

No, I know.

Super metal.

I know.

I I just know that when the right.

We would also, like, we would fuck on stage.

The whole band.

Well, yeah, we'd we'd do like in between, like, a lot of bands would do, like, a solo, but we'd have one guy fucking a lady.

Oh, you did it, right.

And then we'd film it.

So it kind of was porn.

So he might have been filming.

No, that to me feels like porn.

That to me feels because it's a film.

I think it is because it's filmed penetration.

But it's pretty metal.

Yeah, we definitely

helped the cause.

We had a lot of of close-ups, yeah.

Yeah.

But so

it's still, it's rock and roll, you know.

No, I know.

I just think, okay,

I'm ready to,

you know, move back into the.

I mean, the band eventually broke up because one of our guys went up to Washington and got fucked by a horse.

I'm ready to get back into the scripted part of the show.

Okay.

Thank you.

Jimmy runs with it.

He said it's not just the music, but also rock magazines.

And in June of 86, Jimmy gave a sermon attacking Walmart and Kmart for carrying these rock porn magazines.

He's just going after all of it.

Yeah, he's going after all of them.

He's going after the Marts.

Because he can attack whatever he wants because he doesn't get corporate money.

Anything he attacks brings in more money from people.

who are sending in checks.

There's a similarity to Scientology with the fact that if

you're in the club, you're like...

Preston cut this.

He also called the magazines, quote, more dangerous than hustler and playboy.

Now, that's crazy.

Well, I mean,

I had a probably two-year subscription to Hustler at one point, and I'll tell you,

they show a lot there.

But I also, this sounds crazy, but I genuinely was like, they had a very, their political leanings, I really did like

reading Hustler too.

Plus, they gave you a DVD.

And then they're also showing you close-ups of vaginas.

That part to me, it just doesn't even, I don't know if they did that to the...

Maybe they did it the wrong one.

I don't even remember.

Well, he's saying this because he's saying that

it's in a Walmart and a Kmart, so it's more accessible and more kids are seeing it and getting sucked in as opposed to a penthouse, which you can't get at Walmart.

So Hit Prater magazine wrote about Motley Crew, and they described sex with groupies.

The band, the guys talked about.

This is not going to be good.

Jimmy claimed the article was read by a 13-year-old boy.

Quote, the smut business has moved out of the back alleys and the adult bookstores and into your family convenience stores like 7-Eleven.

I mean, all right, I'm just going back to when I was 13.

Definitely, if I went into a 7-Eleven and I browsed the magazine zone and I saw one of these, I could probably do my business.

Right there?

no no no I'd go home no but I yeah

yeah so you know picture picture a world in which you don't have access to porn at any time you want by pulling the thing out of your pocket not the thing but the phone the penis oh the penis um it's a different world so you do different world you did have to try to see it where you could

And it was definitely tantalizing to watch walk by, if you're a kid, walk by

the book, the newspaper rack.

It was.

It was like how an animal would like,

store food.

It was like when you, when there was a huge,

no, no, no, hold on.

It was, you'd be like, if you're like an if you're like a hungry animal and you're not like hunting, but then you see a place for food, you go, I'm going to eat now.

So what am I going to do?

Not eat?

So you're, you got to take, hold on.

It's like a squirrel storm nuts, except you're.

You got to take your shots.

So you're, you got to take your shots.

Young Gareth is grabbing his Playboys and his wheeze and store my mental imagery or what when I could get it you'd store it and you'd put it in you'd get it well that's what we've all everyone's talked about forest porn your nut house well that was a bit I had well not but it's okay but it's true yeah it is true I remember when I was a boy there was some fucking hero yeah who was leaving smut on a lawn yeah and you'd go into the woods and you'd be like this fucking dude left like four fucking weird Yeah pictures.

It's true.

And you'd be like, yes.

Yeah.

I have a whole bit about it because it's true.

It's an actual thing that happens.

It was awesome.

I still do that for kids.

All right.

He called.

Sit there with the mags.

That's not what we're going to call it.

Hold on.

Pest pressed.

No, no, no.

Keep this.

I'm sitting there with the mags in the woods, and I'm waiting for the boys to come over.

And I'm like, fellas, it's Christmas.

It's come Christmas.

Jimmy called rock musicians, quote, preachers of perversion, masquerading as musicians, telling the kids that your parents or anyone else who tells you what to do is the devil and you got to shout right back at them and it doesn't make a lot of sense.

I don't like ending arguments with it doesn't make a lot of sense.

I feel like you kind of lose your crowd a little bit.

Perverted sex themes and actions on stage and all.

Kick Parader, August 1984, carried a lead article about the group in which this particular man describes some of the band's sexual escapades.

He said the other day we had this one chick in the van and she was hanging over the seat naked.

And what follows is a description in detail of varieties of sex acts performed by the girl on band members and vice versa.

Language

and depictions too obscene and graphic to include.

The story was sent to one particular organization by a parent who found her 13-year-old son reading the magazine.

This magazine, I want to tell you something.

Hit Parader is a rotten magazine that can be bought by children of all ages at places like Walmart, Kmart, the grocery store, and practically any other retail store that sells magazines.

The smut business has moved out of the back alleys of the adult bookstores into your family convenience stores.

Like 7-Eleven.

7-Eleven was like, bro, chill.

Boy, there's so many people there.

You can hear a pin drop.

Fuck, it's really packed.

He's, you know,

he's warning them of danger.

It's amazing to be doing this on the heels of Jim Baker.

Yeah.

Just be like, hey, look out.

These are your enemies.

Right?

You know, and I guess that's one of the reasons he did it-to like take the

power back.

Well, yeah, you're tape, but like everyone's like, What the fuck is wrong with these televangelists?

And then you can do that, and then it turns into a thing, and everybody runs with it because

that's how it is.

Yeah, everybody in the media and all the politicians and everyone else is going to be like, Yeah, he's right.

Yeah, gives the rights something to do while they're fucking taking everything away.

So, Walmart executives spoke to Jimmy and then removed 32 magazines from their stores.

Fuck me.

Jesus Christ.

Rolling Stone?

What the fuck?

Circus.

Cream.

I don't know.

I mean.

Hit Parader.

And of course, Tiger Beat.

Tiger Beat.

Wow, that felt...

That's, yeah, that's about...

It's about Tiger Beat.

How am I going to jack off to the Fresh Prince?

Huh?

What did you say?

Are we testing mics or are we talking about this?

I think Tiger Beat is about Tigers beating off.

No, no, no.

You're way off.

I'm thinking of a different tiger beat.

Yeah, that's different.

You're thinking of tiger beat.

I'm thinking of tigger beat.

No.

Oh!

All of a sudden I played with it and it got super big and weird.

Is that honey?

Not anymore, it's not.

Who bears someone has done something to my honey?

I wouldn't have said right away, my friend.

I would give it another second.

Mix it up a little bit.

Eat the honey that's the bottom.

The top is now no longer good.

Tiger made a creme brulee.

Take a torch to it.

Crisp the top.

He really focused on hit parader, which he tied to drugs, venereal disease, and homosexuality, etc.

All the bad things that he in his mind.

Avra, a famine.

Biblical floods.

Quote, I don't listen to this music, but people in my organization do listen to it for research.

Oh, my God, just sitting there.

And they give me printouts.

Oh, my God.

Oh, so weird.

And it's mind-boggling what's going on under the guise of freedom of expression.

Yeah, no shit, asshole.

Walmart pulled.

comedy albums and rock albums, including Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Motley Crew, Ozzy, Black Sabbath, Judas Priest,

and People Lashed Out.

I mean this is the whole thing.

We've talked about it before, but it's just the full Streisand effect of this shit.

Now you're in the fucking news.

Like,

but the truth is that he's a lot of this is not even...

It's not an inearnest mission because he probably knows this just stokes his flock harder.

Absolutely.

Yeah, he doesn't give a shit.

Yeah, he couldn't give a fuck if a 13-year-old's whacking off to Hit Parade.

And the more a band gets mad at him, the more he gets fame with the God people.

Especially in this era with government.

I mean, you know.

So it gets him all the attention he wants.

He's on mainstream news.

He's.

It'd be great if he did an interview with Hit Parade.

He's confronted on CNN's Crossfire.

And in an LA Times article, any attention is good for him.

He now has a TV audience of 2.1 million,

a ministries complex worth 100 million, and 1,500 employees, and a college.

Oh, my God.

And that's the end of part one.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Oh, my God.

Ugh.

Coming out like this.

Talking about this right now is particularly horrendous.

Yeah.

On part two, we break up.

What?

Just a fire near me.

I'll teach you to talk about this guy.

Hey, dollop fans.

I know you love the dollop.

You love listening to the dollop.

Do you want to watch the dollop?

You're like, Gareth, what are you talking about?

By the way, it's not Gary, it's Gareth.

Well, we have partnered with Lakeside Animation and we are starting to animate some of our episodes.

So if you want to go watch a five-parter animation, which is actually like a 22-minute episode or 30-minute episode, I can't remember, of The Rube.

You can go to Lakeside Animation on YouTube and watch a really awesome animation of the Rube.

It really genuinely kicks ass, and we're very proud of it.

And the more you share it, the more you give it to people, the more you follow Lakeside, all that stuff, the better chance we have of making a lot more of them.

We're already making a second one, so go there and watch The Rube.

It's time to head back to school and forward to your future with Carrington College.

For over 55 years, we've helped train the next generation of healthcare professionals.

Apply now to get hands-on training from teachers with real-world experience.

In as few as nine months, you could start making a difference in healthcare.

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