#2778 Trailer Trash Bonus: The Valley Season 2

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Speaker 2 And I love putting on a fresh new sock. That's one of my favorite things when you get brand new socks and you put them on and you're just like walking on clouds.
I love it.

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Speaker 1 Head over to bombas.com slash crappins and use code crap ins for 20% off your first purchase. That's bombbas.com slash crap ins code crap ins to checkout.

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Speaker 2 Sale ends December 7th.

Speaker 1 You already know we love Virgin Voyages. This cruise line is more iconic than Ramona Singer's Runway Walk.

Speaker 11 We're talking all-inclusive everything. Wi-Fi, dining, entertainment, group fitness classes, everything is included.
No hidden fees, no surprise charges.

Speaker 1 And unlike most of the Cast of the Valley, all Virgin Voyages trips are 100% kid-free. No room for loud toys and crying kids to drown out the sounds of the ocean.

Speaker 11 The destinations are amazing, too. Some highlights Aruba, St.
Lucia, New York, Miami, Iceland, and a below-deck favorite, The Med.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, the boats are beautiful. They're so modern.
The rooms are just so luxurious. I love all the colored lighting in there and the balconies.

Speaker 11 And I also just love that they are tailored for adult experiences.

Speaker 3 That makes me so happy.

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Speaker 11 Learn more at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor.

Speaker 11 Watch what craft is.

Speaker 11 Watch what craft is. Who cares what happens? But there's so much good rapids.

Speaker 15 Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens.

Speaker 18 I'm Ronnie and that's Ben.

Speaker 19 Hi, Ben.

Speaker 17 Hi, how are you?

Speaker 6 Gen, how are you?

Speaker 3 You know, just

Speaker 3 making our way through the week.

Speaker 20 All

Speaker 17 we've got.

Speaker 6 Very special week.

Speaker 20 We are going to be in DC and Philly this week.

Speaker 24 We're so excited.

Speaker 25 In D.C., we're going to be doing Southern Charm, the first reunion.

Speaker 20 And in Philly, we're going to be doing summer housing, which is very exciting.

Speaker 23 So while you guys wait for that, we're going to do a very special bonus episode, a trailer trash of the valley season two.

Speaker 25 Normally, these are on Patreon.

Speaker 29 So if you like this kind of stuff, go join Patreon.

Speaker 9 That's where they're at. Okay.

Speaker 26 Patreon.com slash watch at Crappins.

Speaker 28 It's also where you get our recaps for the end of White Lotus, which we're going to do the next couple of.

Speaker 23 We just did a catch-up recap of that.

Speaker 30 You'll find traders recaps there, airport snaps where we mock people in an airport, stuff like that.

Speaker 19 It's fun.

Speaker 28 It's also where you get the video version of this if you want to watch along as we take this down shot by

Speaker 33 shot, moment by moment, millisecond by millisecond.

Speaker 36 Let's see, man, you excited about the Val?

Speaker 16 How are you feeling?

Speaker 3 Of course. The Valley was one of the surprise hits of last year.

Speaker 3 None of us could believe how good it was. We all thought it was going to be garbage and awful and just miserable to watch.
And it was so good. And I'm just really looking forward to it.

Speaker 3 You know, we don't have Banner Pump Rules coming back anytime soon. And we don't have any housewives on the radar, actually.

Speaker 3 So yeah, this is this is what we're going to need to get us through the spring.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 26 Now, the big worry here is that Jax has come out of the closet with his Coke addiction, you know, right in time to promote his new podcast and this season of the show.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 19 I cannot feel for Jax.

Speaker 30 I'm sorry, okay.

Speaker 32 As someone with a Coke addiction a while back, I know that it sucks.

Speaker 39 I know that it's hard, but Jax still sucks.

Speaker 40 And I'm not going to give him a break just because he has a Coke addiction.

Speaker 41 But good for him for working it through and stuff if he ever does that.

Speaker 30 But Jax still sucks.

Speaker 42 Okay.

Speaker 9 Here's Jax.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Right now on our screen.

Speaker 21 And

Speaker 3 really wearing white.

Speaker 3 Just

Speaker 3 he sort of is looking like a very fresh egg, you know?

Speaker 21 He's dressed like a Coke addiction.

Speaker 3 He really, he really is. But he's got like this white blazer on.

Speaker 3 I mean, why, why are you going for like kind of almost like a Miami look while you're trying to show that you're past your Coke addiction?

Speaker 9 Yeah.

Speaker 41 Yeah, Miami vice.

Speaker 27 Uh, but here he is in his all-white and his seemingly full head of hair.

Speaker 9 Ha ha ha.

Speaker 25 Turn around, sucka.

Speaker 43 So Jax looking right into the camera and showing off it.

Speaker 22 Did he always have these hand tattoos?

Speaker 41 He didn't always have these, did he?

Speaker 17 I think those are new.

Speaker 3 I don't know.

Speaker 3 I think those are relatively new.

Speaker 9 That's what I'm going to say. Well, here he is.

Speaker 42 He still can't grow full facial hair.

Speaker 30 So, you know, he's still got that part of youth about him.

Speaker 44 So he's there.

Speaker 38 The next shot is Kristen Oak dressed like curtains in an old theater, like saloon theater that are closed.

Speaker 3 Yeah, she's definitely giving kind of like a bordello decor look for her dress. She's like, seriously, seriously.
And then Luke is walking with her and he's filled out a bit since last season.

Speaker 3 So he, he sort of has got like kind of a different look as a result. His beard is longer and more square.
His hair is more filled out. He's wearing for some reason this like fuchsia shirt.

Speaker 3 It's not, I would not say it's like a great look for him, but it is a look for him.

Speaker 31 Well, you know, he's in some dockers and a pink

Speaker 43 You know, this bottom button kind of unbuttoned but tucked.

Speaker 7 You know, another feeling.

Speaker 43 Another feeling, Luke.

Speaker 23 But, you know, he's Luke, so that's good. And then we get Michelle.

Speaker 47 Wow.

Speaker 29 I'm wearing sunglasses.

Speaker 3 Look at me. I am Michelle Lolly.
I am going to be full of hot ticks because I'm single and ready to mingle for season two.

Speaker 27 And then we've got Zach with a fan that he's clanking shut like Kenya Moore.

Speaker 47 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 37 And he's like, I've heard what everyone said about my hair.

Speaker 3 And instead of having it as a helmet, I'm going to have it like a helmet with hair that goes up a little bit in the front. So you can see it's my real hair.

Speaker 25 I'm getting like bangs. I'm getting like upturned bangs.

Speaker 38 It does look a little more natural, though, his hair.

Speaker 48 So that's good.

Speaker 9 Poor guy.

Speaker 41 Yeah, it's he really got slaughtered over that hair.

Speaker 27 Why are they giving them prop sunglasses?

Speaker 22 None of these people own these sunglasses. Like, they're

Speaker 3 a photo booth.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.
They're like, okay, here's a prop. You can do a mustache, a fan, sunglasses, whatever you want.

Speaker 21 Just have fun with it.

Speaker 38 He's also going for a skin-toned lip

Speaker 9 thing, which I'm not really sure what that's about, but you know, bless his heart.

Speaker 27 And then we get to Brittany fanning herself because, you know, if they live in the valley, it's hot.

Speaker 3 She's got her Botox going strong. She's also wearing kind of fuchsia, fuchsia top, fuchsia belt.

Speaker 50 She's wearing a bathing suit.

Speaker 31 Is she wearing a bathing suit with the belt?

Speaker 21 She might be.

Speaker 3 She might be wearing a bathing suit. Yeah.

Speaker 51 And she looks like she's draining herself with a waffle.

Speaker 22 So that's yeah. And then we go to the

Speaker 37 waffle.

Speaker 28 Then we go to these two.

Speaker 30 Oh, Janet and what's his face?

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 3 What's his face? I want to say his name is Brian, but it's not Brian.

Speaker 37 I forgot his name.

Speaker 3 Jason. Jason, no.
Yeah.

Speaker 50 Yeah, Jason.

Speaker 30 He seems like he's so nice, but he supports Janet, who's an emotional terrorist. So I don't trust him either.

Speaker 9 And I guess the girls are like, let's pink, let's get a lot of pink in.

Speaker 38 So they're doing that.

Speaker 28 And the guys are just doing things that should go with pink, but don't.

Speaker 7 Like, he's wearing like a fall orange, um, yeah, which doesn't go with this.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think everything is supposed to be like reds and oranges and pinks. But, like, yeah, I feel like there's the colors, the color scheme is a little odd.

Speaker 3 The palette is odd for me, but you know, um, yeah, the Janet is now, this will be our first um non-pregnant Janin season, which is exciting.

Speaker 3 Uh, jana is a terror but i sort of enjoyed that she was a terror

Speaker 3 oh she was really really really bad and and i held on to i held on to hope that she wasn't as bad as she seemed and then she was as bad as she seemed but i you know i enjoyed you know i always like i love a monster she sucks uh so then uh just basically the quality of the clothes i have to say you know sometimes in season two they get a bigger budget and come back in nicer clothes not this cast no this cast is very much like you know friday night at the Cineplex Odeon in, you know,

Speaker 55 the $5 theater.

Speaker 41 I'm sorry, I'm thinking of New York, not the valley.

Speaker 42 Like, is this stained?

Speaker 22 Is Michelle's outfit?

Speaker 5 What is it? Is this stained? Is it usually?

Speaker 11 She found it out of the closet.

Speaker 3 And she's like, well, this will do.

Speaker 27 Brittany's bathing suit with the belt. And then this whole outfit is crazy.

Speaker 23 And then we go to

Speaker 17 three under four,

Speaker 36 whatever he says. What's his name?

Speaker 3 Well, it used to be two under three, but now they're pregnant. So it's going to be a three under four.
It's danny

Speaker 3 danny also got props on glasses he's wearing a fuchsia blazer um i wonder if he got it from the same cheap place downtown that i got mine two years ago for the crappies

Speaker 26 yeah these are bad and he's doing like the faux hawk from like what 15 years ago kind of thing

Speaker 3 and kind of a quaker collared shirt which i think is really funny because you know he just wants to have a million children is that what that's called a quaker collar because i have two of those shirts and i'm like what are these called i'm getting really i call them collars i don't know what they're they're actually called.

Speaker 45 I don't know, fashion.

Speaker 37 Okay.

Speaker 3 Mock.

Speaker 7 But I call them that because Quakers wear them.

Speaker 23 And then we've got his wife. What's her face?

Speaker 10 Nina. Nia?

Speaker 6 Nia.

Speaker 8 Nia, who Ben is still convinced is evil. You thought she was evil in the first.
Well, you said she would be evil, but then she turned out to be really nice.

Speaker 23 But will she be second season bitch popping soon?

Speaker 3 Who knows? I don't think she's evil. I really felt like I had a lot of good signals to say that she was evil.

Speaker 3 The fact that she would call Danny Daniel Daniel and she was very, um, she was very like surfacey. So I was like, oh, she's evil.
Watch. She's going to be the most evil one.

Speaker 3 But she shockingly managed to be just a very nice person who

Speaker 3 was trying to have a sort of like mature experience on reality TV. And I didn't know what to do with it.

Speaker 35 Well, she's the only one that looks kind of comfortable in this intro, boogieing down.

Speaker 32 She looks great. Yeah.

Speaker 57 She's like, oh my God, I'm not pregnant for five minutes. I'm going to enjoy this.

Speaker 41 And I'm pregnant again. By the end of this, she's like, oh, just got it back.
I'm pregnant.

Speaker 7 So

Speaker 41 I have an announcement to make, everybody.

Speaker 3 And then they give Jesse Lolly, they give him also the egg yolk and egg yolk and eggshell combo that they gave to Jax. Maybe it's the same shirt.

Speaker 3 Maybe they're just giving the douchebags this orange shirt. Like, this is the color symbol for like the worst douchebags on the show.
Because here he is again. He's, he's wearing this.

Speaker 3 The shirt is back again, I should say. And he's got sunglasses as well.

Speaker 3 He still has his hair dent.

Speaker 3 I'm still impressed that he continued.

Speaker 3 Does he know not to wear that band anymore? He loves that band.

Speaker 37 He just has wear a headband and it keeps your hair dented.

Speaker 48 That's just how it goes.

Speaker 28 He's looking a little bit better this year.

Speaker 22 I like that he insisted on wearing his own pants.

Speaker 23 He's like, listen, you've already got me dressed like a magician, but I'm wearing decent pants.

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 7 I make money.

Speaker 20 So then we go to this beautiful lady for the bachelor name.

Speaker 7 What's her name? Jaclyn.

Speaker 10 How did we just get her name?

Speaker 3 Jacqueline. She really had such a bad, like, she had like no, she, she, she was so wedged onto the show.
She almost had no,

Speaker 7 no role.

Speaker 3 Although she did start shit. She got, she definitely was a little bit of a bone carrier and she got some drama going, but she, her personal storyline was never really very vital to the show.

Speaker 41 Well, her and Zebra was there to start shit with everybody else.

Speaker 27 No, it's not, we'll get it in a second, but how do we not remember?

Speaker 23 God, I even recapped her on like two seasons of The Bachelor, and I'm still forgetting her name.

Speaker 43 That's terrible.

Speaker 45 Okay.

Speaker 3 I'll look it up. I'll look it up.

Speaker 50 Then Kristen's like, oh, I have sunglasses too.

Speaker 9 Also, I like to have Jill.

Speaker 28 That's why I have music things tattooed on my arm.

Speaker 50 I've listened to music before.

Speaker 3 Sometimes when I'm being really fun, I put these sunglasses on Jill the dog.

Speaker 3 It's hilarious. Seriously.

Speaker 42 She's so weird.

Speaker 43 She has a treble and a bass clef turned into a heart on her arm.

Speaker 12 But then up here, she's also got the treble clef again.

Speaker 41 Like, you already got that.

Speaker 28 Are you just so drunk that you're forgetting that you're getting the same tattoos?

Speaker 42 But this time it's a heart.

Speaker 28 She's also got a necklace with a K and an L.

Speaker 47 Oh, well.

Speaker 3 Jasmine is the name, not Jacqueline. It's Jasmine.

Speaker 28 Yeah, duh.

Speaker 26 Thank you for looking at it.

Speaker 3 You know what's so sad is if you do a search on Google for Cast the Valley,

Speaker 3 it brings up all these headshots and they include everyone but Zach.

Speaker 7 So mean.

Speaker 3 They also, half this cast looks crazy in their photos that Google selects.

Speaker 41 You You know, this picture that we're showing now is the logo, and it's over a shot of the valley. And this really does encapsulate the valley.

Speaker 9 This is freeways.

Speaker 42 It's just freeways.

Speaker 26 This is like the part of the freeway.

Speaker 30 I've almost died 20 times.

Speaker 23 It's like 10 freeways coming into one.

Speaker 22 And then they're like, oh, you're the next exit?

Speaker 27 Go over 10 lanes in five seconds.

Speaker 21 Yes.

Speaker 17 How fun. Is this Laurel?

Speaker 3 Is this, I'm sorry, is this like the 101 and the 170 when they peel off with each other?

Speaker 28 I think it is. There's like five freeways here.

Speaker 22 There's like a million freeways.

Speaker 3 Yeah, this is what it is and it's a nightmare and what's here's what's really terrible about let me tell people about driving on the 101 going west or north whichever you just whichever you decide what happens is you're driving on the 101

Speaker 3 and the left two lanes peel off and become the 170. so you need to stay in the right lanes in order to um in order to be on the 101.
But let's say this.

Speaker 3 Let's say you want to get off at like Laurel Canyon Boulevard or Vineland boulevard so you are you stay on the you stay on those three lanes and you're in the three lanes you're on the right side of the highway ready to exit but then suddenly after you get after the the two lanes peel off to become the 170 all of a sudden your highway the 101 merges with the 134 and all of a sudden you hanging out in the right lane suddenly are all the way in the left lane and now you have to get to that exit and you were all prepared to go to that exit because you were in the right lane but now suddenly surprise you're all the way on the left side of the highway and you had no control over it and now you've got to speed over an entire highway to get to your exit.

Speaker 3 That is this intersection right here.

Speaker 50 Yeah, this is it's hell.

Speaker 45 It's hell.

Speaker 20 So then we go to some shops in the Val.

Speaker 3 Wow, Witsit. There's Ventura Boulevard.
That's Laurel, Laurel Terrace and Witsit.

Speaker 3 That's where all the good stuff happens.

Speaker 12 And here we are. People on a boat.

Speaker 35 Let's press play.

Speaker 3 This is not part of the valley.

Speaker 10 A boat.

Speaker 37 What's that? I guarantee.

Speaker 3 This is not part of the valley. There's no place for a boat or a body of water like this in the valley.

Speaker 9 Yeah, this was a drive.

Speaker 45 This was a drive for sure.

Speaker 58 Hey, baby. What are you doing?

Speaker 59 What the f?

Speaker 30 That is so Kristen.

Speaker 26 Okay, so they're on a boat.

Speaker 27 It's Luke and Kristen.

Speaker 23 It's beautiful. He goes, hey, baby.

Speaker 27 And she turns around and falls.

Speaker 17 She's like, whoa.

Speaker 10 And she falls into a ring.

Speaker 28 And I love, that's just so Kristen to be falling during her proposal. So he's like, hey, baby, you want to get chicken nuggets with me for the rest of our lives?

Speaker 58 Seriously? Hey, baby.

Speaker 60 Seriously?

Speaker 59 What the f ⁇ ?

Speaker 3 Will you be the catch of my lifetime, baby?

Speaker 37 Who would have thought?

Speaker 41 Would you be the catch of my lifetime, baby?

Speaker 3 Because they're fishing.

Speaker 3 They're on their fishing. Seriously? I didn't think that being on this boat here by Ranchus Palace Verde is would ever lead to the moment of my lifetime.
Seriously.

Speaker 20 I never knew that he really would take my love of Wicked Tuna so seriously.

Speaker 10 He proposed while we were fishing. I was like, wicked.
What's Wicked too though

Speaker 3 i'm surprised they did not incorporate uh jill into this proposal like how jill come up with a little ring in a box you know

Speaker 10 oh the dog

Speaker 53 jill

Speaker 2 jill who they left all those rose petals for and then jill was like

Speaker 10 it's me jill's aaron or jill's aaron

Speaker 54 who would have thought kristen and luke kept the best relationship out of all

Speaker 41 I think all of us thought that Kristen and Luke probably had the best relationship out of you two losers.

Speaker 27 I mean, you've got Jax and you've got Lolly sitting here.

Speaker 41 We knew your relationship sucked.

Speaker 24 You both seem like abusive fucking assholes.

Speaker 23 And Jax in his stupid Jax hat.

Speaker 41 Oh my God. Yeah.

Speaker 30 By the way, he's got flowers behind fake flowers behind him that are shaped like his hat.

Speaker 47 Yeah.

Speaker 29 And what's his other shirt?

Speaker 22 He's wearing his Jaxis shirt and

Speaker 37 something like dad life.

Speaker 7 Dad,

Speaker 21 dad life.

Speaker 3 Dad life.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Dad life.
Or in his case, absentee dad life.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 26 No kidding. Dad kicked my child out of the house so I can keep living there as I screw that his mother up.

Speaker 3 Not afraid, not helping. Yeah, not helping at all, dad.
Life.

Speaker 54 Best relationship of all.

Speaker 61 Jacks has been seeing people. He had a girl staying here at the house again last night.

Speaker 63 There is a thong on my bathroom saying, Yeah, it's like, why was there a baby wife on top of it? She wiped her vagina and it's on her.

Speaker 16 The new.

Speaker 17 Oh, okay.

Speaker 37 So there is a thong.

Speaker 10 Thong, I'm not sure.

Speaker 9 There was a girl staying at my place last night.

Speaker 41 Brittany is just making up this accent now. Nobody talks like this.

Speaker 9 Okay. Nobody says no.

Speaker 50 What do you think?

Speaker 26 Like in the first act of My Fair Lady?

Speaker 27 Nobody talks like that.

Speaker 9 And why are you wearing a blanket for a shirt in the valley?

Speaker 53 It's 900 degrees.

Speaker 51 J-A-A-X.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 this is a meeting of the minds over here with Michelle, Janet, and Brittany.

Speaker 3 And they are discussing what vaginas may or may not have been wiped and

Speaker 3 over in the household.

Speaker 40 Brittany, it's season two. Do your roots.
How is this the first thing we see of Brittany?

Speaker 41 Brittany, you're still a damn mess.

Speaker 41 But you're better than Janet because Janet looks Janet. Janet's at like some banking convention in the Midwest.

Speaker 9 Like, who dressed Janet?

Speaker 3 I don't think Janet wants to wear this. She looks unhappy in it.
She's like, I told my friend she's a struggling designer that I'll wear it on TV and I regret every single moment of that promise.

Speaker 6 Well, it's better than my friend who designs comforters. I'm wearing a dubai on the TV.

Speaker 41 And Michelle Lolly's like, oh my God, I hate both of you.

Speaker 3 I'm wearing CDs. Rob Reiner.

Speaker 10 What games she wears too?

Speaker 17 What are these people wearing?

Speaker 3 It's from Rob Reiner.

Speaker 3 It's just a white, thin, lazy thing.

Speaker 7 It's time for a commercial.

Speaker 49 It's time for a crappin's commercial.

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Speaker 2 Cold mornings, holiday plans. This is when I just want my wardrobe to be simple.
Stuff that looks sharp, feels good, and things I'll actually wear. For me, that's Quince.

Speaker 2 And the bonus, Quince pieces make great gifts too.

Speaker 1 I got a cashmere hoodie in like an oatmeal color, and it's finally time that I get to wear this thing. I'm wearing it all the time, and I look adorable and dashing.

Speaker 1 I love them for the wardrobe pieces like this, you know, when it's like cold, you get a nice sweater, a nice pair of pants. I mean, Quince is great for that.

Speaker 2 And I got a titanium watch band for my smartwatch that looks very chic. So, this season's lineup is simple but smart and easy with Quince.

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Now available in Canada, too.

Speaker 2 That's q-u-in-ce-e.com/slash crap-ins. Free shipping and 365-day returns.

Speaker 1 Quince.com slash crap-ins.

Speaker 3 I want to see Michelle Lolly have like, like smile. Like, this is, Michelle Lolly, you're finally freed from Jesse.
Smile. Enjoy it.

Speaker 45 Be happy.

Speaker 6 Yeah.

Speaker 64 Well, you got a thong with the baby wipe.

Speaker 63 Wipe on top of it. She wiped a vagina and it's on your f ⁇ ing house.

Speaker 65 It's a new Moby Dick for Brittany.

Speaker 9 Zach. It's a new Moby Dick for Brittany.

Speaker 26 Zach is wearing a tank top that's got like Real Housewives of Orange County cutouts in it. Yes.

Speaker 24 A new tattoo sleeve that makes it...

Speaker 14 Wait.

Speaker 41 Oh, no. This one's just a party where he looks like he's been run over by a car.

Speaker 12 What's happening?

Speaker 37 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Well, something happened because Brittany has like a scuff on her elbow. Oh, there's Sheena.

Speaker 3 Sheena's there. And then Zach is, um, he has, I don't know.
Is this like a zombie-themed party? I'm trying to understand why there's, why it's a, why there's so much

Speaker 3 graphic body arts going on right now.

Speaker 25 Yeah, but it's only him.

Speaker 26 And then she's got some on her elbow, but no one else has any of that on them.

Speaker 37 She was like, well, I was going to look like I was.

Speaker 3 I wanted to, I was going to participate in the theme of looking like you're immauled by a zombie today, but then I was afraid that Summer Moon would get really scared. So I decided to refrain.

Speaker 41 Oh, well, this, I think, is a baby shower because look, they have this balloon arch thing back here with like purples and pinks and then like some kind of big balloon here.

Speaker 22 So, do you think this is like a baby shower?

Speaker 10 Yeah, right.

Speaker 3 But then it would be a baby shower for Kristen, maybe, but then they all hate Kristen.

Speaker 21 So I don't get it.

Speaker 7 Oh, I don't know. Well, don't they have to make up?

Speaker 35 Well, she's not in any of these scenes, so maybe not.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 46 I don't know.

Speaker 37 I don't know who this is for.

Speaker 65 Nick for Brittany.

Speaker 27 Oh, so is this a party?

Speaker 31 I guess this is.

Speaker 22 They're all dressed up in something.

Speaker 37 Race car?

Speaker 3 This is them being wacky doing like a NASCAR themed event. So that'll be fun.

Speaker 5 Okay

Speaker 63 $20 to snort this was on me

Speaker 63 weird as f ⁇ you're mean to my friend

Speaker 42 Okay, so this is the wacky fun and games part they're having a group dinner and Chris is like 20 bucks to snort with zombie so Luke does it which isn't that his $20 anyway.

Speaker 10 It's like their $20, you know so try to win within the family.

Speaker 3 Also,

Speaker 3 so I guess Kristen is back in with the group. So, you know, we never got a reunion last season, never forget.
So there's so much that we don't really know where they stand.

Speaker 3 You know, we don't know what the vibe is with this group. Now, is Jax there? Is there no Jax? Is this, well, Jax is in rehab, do we think?

Speaker 30 Oh, probably, because at the very end is Brittany and then Zach.

Speaker 28 And so we don't see Jax.

Speaker 25 We do see a new douche nozzle right here with his head.

Speaker 7 We only get the back of his head here.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 43 The comb over is comb overing.

Speaker 22 And then we, this girl's new, right?

Speaker 3 That's not Nia? I think that might be Nia with a strange angle.

Speaker 47 Oh, okay.

Speaker 30 Well, that would make sense. She's sitting next to Jesse.

Speaker 35 Let's see.

Speaker 13 She doesn't look like Nia. I could be wrong.

Speaker 17 Maybe it is new.

Speaker 37 No, no, I don't think that's Nia. That's not Nia.

Speaker 43 No.

Speaker 3 No, especially because we see Nia from that other shot is...

Speaker 3 I don't know who that is. She's an interloper.

Speaker 28 Yeah, I think this is Nia, this head right here.

Speaker 11 But let's see.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think so. She's short.

Speaker 17 This was on me.

Speaker 59 Don't forget.

Speaker 10 Weird as f ⁇ .

Speaker 63 You're mean to my friend. I think you're toxic.
I think you're a narcissist.

Speaker 60 And I'm happy I don't have to deal with you.

Speaker 62 Well, this.

Speaker 68 Well, damn.

Speaker 21 Who's that? Lala.

Speaker 3 Lala coming in.

Speaker 17 Oh, sister. Lala.

Speaker 8 Oh, Jesus.

Speaker 19 Why are they doing this?

Speaker 7 Come on, man.

Speaker 16 Your show got canceled.

Speaker 40 Go away.

Speaker 3 Stop the fucking with Lala.

Speaker 3 Look at Sheena next to her and be like, yeah. I'm just going to say it with my eyes.

Speaker 47 I grabbed Lala.

Speaker 7 I grab La. I am with Lala.

Speaker 37 I stand with her.

Speaker 17 I have a nose right now.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 37 I have a necklace that says summer.

Speaker 50 It's so long.

Speaker 25 You think it's for my daughter, but because he's mean to her friends. He's a misogynist, which is not inaccurate.

Speaker 1 It's just that it's Lala.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 And Jesse, meanwhile, is trying to be like stand strong, but he's got like fringe that's interrupting his hair. So he's getting really upset.

Speaker 48 He's like hi

Speaker 3 in ayahuasca which is why i'm wearing this necklace and i have still healthy hair for my age so fuck off what about that uh and i'm kind of upset that this uh umbrella fringe is getting into my hair also i like that he's getting told off but you can see through the reflect reflection of his sunglasses what he's concentrating on and it's her rack

Speaker 5 yeah and just the boobs nothing but boobs he's like all i hear are your boobs

Speaker 3 and i'm happy i don't have to deal with you well this gave me a good laugh so thank you for that scrotox let's freaking shoot your balls up

Speaker 37 danny's getting scrotox he's gonna be funny getting scrots

Speaker 3 he's gonna get in there maybe he'll do his um his uh

Speaker 3 his his video game a voiceover while he's getting doing the appointment what was it what was it that

Speaker 3 what was the video game he did it Was it Walking Dead, the video game or something?

Speaker 41 Yeah, he's played zombie.

Speaker 26 No, he's done the show walking dead he plays a zombie in walking dead so

Speaker 35 he's got a never-ending job where yeah he walks around he's like

Speaker 3 that's funny so he's gonna get scrow talks he's gonna be wacky okay

Speaker 3 is jesse doing some sort of screen therapy

Speaker 54 hi uh sister coachio you've been served

Speaker 3 i already told him well now it's jax getting served done what a how special how special that you know anytime that someone gets served on camera, I always feel like we are so blessed.

Speaker 37 And look at John. Don't get

Speaker 28 posing with his head down and his hands in prayer motion, and then he's slowly bringing his head up.

Speaker 34 Like, guys, it's me. He's somber.

Speaker 57 Getting served, sucker.

Speaker 3 He's been through things.

Speaker 35 Yeah.

Speaker 61 I already told him: filing, restraining order, and custody.

Speaker 3 It's like a very low-end version of receipts proof timeline.

Speaker 13 Filing.

Speaker 7 Restraining order.

Speaker 53 Custody.

Speaker 61 Filing. Filing.
Restraining order.

Speaker 61 And custody.

Speaker 44 And custody.

Speaker 10 And chicken fingers.

Speaker 39 Do not forget chicken figures.

Speaker 3 What is she eating? What is this? Is this like a noodle bowl of some sort?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 It's like some sort of fat like Chinese food to go or jade noodles or something.

Speaker 3 She's got a big-ass knife for it, whatever it is.

Speaker 28 But I like whoever's eating with her is having a bowl.

Speaker 3 Yeah, someone ordered sweet greens. She's like, I think I'm going to get jade noodles, but I want a big knot for it.

Speaker 26 And is there cake here on the side?

Speaker 53 I love this.

Speaker 32 These people order like me.

Speaker 36 You know, it's what you get when Uber Eats will go like to five places.

Speaker 27 Like, and also I'll have cake and also a bowl. Uh, but don't worry, I got my own steak knife because in LA, they don't give you that shit.

Speaker 3 You know, you have to do that.

Speaker 2 I got my steak knife.

Speaker 3 Those noodles are real crunchy. I got my steak knife for it.

Speaker 28 And then LA, they're like, we're saving a treat.

Speaker 22 Eat with your hands.

Speaker 7 I do. She's got.

Speaker 14 Sorry.

Speaker 3 Oh, no, that arrow, that arrow tattoo, that's to remind you which hand uses the fork and which hand uses the big steak.

Speaker 27 She's like, and by the way, I was stupid.

Speaker 12 Wait, hold on.

Speaker 26 Let me stop saying the movie.

Speaker 64 Which way is important?

Speaker 3 Yeah, she's having a big meal.

Speaker 54 I'm at the point where I'm so in love with the man I want to become that I'm just not satisfied with who I am anymore.

Speaker 10 What the fuck?

Speaker 3 So Jax's addiction is rooted in his aspirations to be a better person. I got it.

Speaker 64 But see, this is what I'm saying about Jax.

Speaker 25 He's like,

Speaker 41 I'm going to do a very touching drug-addicted video in my Jax's Studio City hat.

Speaker 3 But also, I'll also promote my bar.

Speaker 41 At the same time, it's going to go viral.

Speaker 25 So I'm going to promote my bar.

Speaker 32 He's just so, I just don't believe a fucking thing from this guy.

Speaker 25 You're in love with the man you could become.

Speaker 52 You're in love with the man that you are, Jax.

Speaker 27 Okay.

Speaker 23 You just think that nobody else is on board and you just need to do the right things to make them get on with it.

Speaker 3 I also love how we're in the year 2025, and it's been probably a solid decade or two since we've used camcorders.

Speaker 3 And still, they're like, let's put the recorder with a little circle up at the top there, just so everyone knows this is a home video.

Speaker 26 And we know this is fake because it's fully charged.

Speaker 48 That would never be Jax's camcorder.

Speaker 35 It would always be like blinking red, you know, like must charge, must charge.

Speaker 3 He would be snorting the battery charge out. He's like going up to the pictures.

Speaker 21 Jax, because

Speaker 54 I'm so in love with the man I I want to become that I'm just not satisfied with who I am anymore.

Speaker 3 Michelle.

Speaker 12 The infamous male on Bravo.

Speaker 30 I'm going to cry into a camcorder so people believe it.

Speaker 10 Also, look, he doesn't have the tattoo here.

Speaker 66 Oh, so it doesn't.

Speaker 2 Well observed.

Speaker 3 Well observed.

Speaker 7 And he doesn't have them here.

Speaker 12 Yeah. Where'd they come from?

Speaker 37 So he must have got them in rehab.

Speaker 3 He realized the man he wants to be. She's basically quoting Jerry Maguire.
I love you for the man he wants to be and the man you already are.

Speaker 14 I love you.

Speaker 17 I love Jerry.

Speaker 35 He's like the human brain.

Speaker 5 Weighs eight pounds.

Speaker 54 My bad. Watch it.

Speaker 54 And I'm just not satisfied with who I am anymore.

Speaker 3 Michelle admitted that she cheated on me.

Speaker 21 I have got a decision.

Speaker 18 Well, I don't blame her.

Speaker 36 Michelle admitted that she cheated on me.

Speaker 3 First of all, you didn't cheat, Jesse Lolly, my asshole you didn't cheat yeah come on yeah um michelle deserved to cheat and god godspeed she i am proud of her i am proud i am proud of her for cheating i like this look she's giving she's like sure did

Speaker 33 me

Speaker 3 unfortunately i stained my dress right afterwards but you know

Speaker 53 i cheated on him a hundred years ago when this dress was first made Nailed it.

Speaker 33 Cheated on him.

Speaker 48 Okay, let's see who she cheated with.

Speaker 3 Michelle admitted that she cheated on me.

Speaker 70 I have evidence that she's sleeping with a billionaire for $1,500 a night.

Speaker 6 What the hell? So now you're

Speaker 17 on TV.

Speaker 26 Oh, that's Danny.

Speaker 8 So he's saying that she's like a hooker.

Speaker 10 Luke.

Speaker 21 Wow.

Speaker 25 I have evidence that she's sleeping with a billionaire for $1,500 a night.

Speaker 41 Who the fuck tells some walking dead extra their business?

Speaker 10 I want to see your evidence, sir.

Speaker 27 I'm not telling some under five zombie

Speaker 26 what I'm paying somebody to sleep with them.

Speaker 10 Bullshit.

Speaker 3 Bullshit. Also

Speaker 3 in the background, there's a book that says Mexican today.

Speaker 3 And I don't know if

Speaker 3 I don't know if I don't know whose apartment we're in.

Speaker 3 If this is Kristen's, though, I like to think that Kristen found the book. I was like, I'd like to know what's going on with Mexico Today.

Speaker 46 Buy the book.

Speaker 3 You guys know what's going on with Mexico today? Hold on. Let me get the book.

Speaker 23 I think that this is someone who's just like, let's just get red books.

Speaker 28 You know, let's just get books that that are the same color and put them together because they're all with red.

Speaker 55 It's with other red books.

Speaker 3 Yeah. I think it's probably Danny and Nia's house, actually, because I think Nia is the sort of person who organizes books by the rainbow.

Speaker 3 And she's like, I saw this on the complete edit or whatever that, the home edit. Remember, we watched that.
We recapped the home edit once.

Speaker 14 Yeah.

Speaker 27 She's like, we red books go together.

Speaker 26 So supposedly, now if she is getting $1,500 a night, I mean, good for her.

Speaker 5 That's a lot of money.

Speaker 33 God damn.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 45 Why not get paid for

Speaker 3 the things you enjoy? You know that?

Speaker 70 $1,500 a night. Did you not cheat me?

Speaker 15 Whoa. So he's saying, did you not cheat?

Speaker 42 And she throws a full...

Speaker 9 Damn, that's a full glass.

Speaker 17 That's a lot.

Speaker 37 That's all that liquid.

Speaker 3 Good thing he had his hair already in a band because otherwise

Speaker 21 his hairstyle would be ruined.

Speaker 41 That's why he always wears headbands because he'd get

Speaker 55 so many drinks thrown in his face.

Speaker 3 So this is on a a vacation right i think so because there's like a tap in the foreground yeah and that makes it sort of looks like a vacation rental i feel like she went and got a pint glass and filled it all the way up so that way she could just so she could do it to him because that is a huge amount of water to come from a cup yeah just to be prepared in a jesse scene okay

Speaker 61 you when jason goes out he takes his wedding ring off oh

Speaker 64 jason goes out again this is the storyline i wanted this one right now this thing is gonna hit you, Jason.

Speaker 3 Now it's going to hit you.

Speaker 21 God, I love Pregnant Mariposa.

Speaker 3 I feel like she just wants to sit somewhere and listen to Fleetwood Mac.

Speaker 27 Well, also, Janet's trying to fuck with Kristen.

Speaker 28 Like, Janet's never watched these shows.

Speaker 25 You are barking up the wrong tree, man.

Speaker 26 I'm coming for Kristen.

Speaker 32 I hope Kristen ruins this chick's life for all the shit she's been trying to do with Kristen.

Speaker 27 Now, I point this out.

Speaker 41 I feel like in every episode we do of every show now, but these eyebrows stop.

Speaker 71 This trend has to stop. you guys.

Speaker 19 Stop magic markering on your eyebrows.

Speaker 44 You look crazy.

Speaker 40 And they're all doing it.

Speaker 39 Even Jax's are like this now.

Speaker 17 Stop it.

Speaker 9 You look nuts.

Speaker 42 Okay, so she's saying that Jason is going out without his wedding ring.

Speaker 30 Meanwhile, Janet is dressed like a catering napkin.

Speaker 45 Like, who folded it?

Speaker 3 Janet is so happy in this shot. Look at her.
She's like, I did it. I finally got to kiss my husband.

Speaker 37 He takes his wedding ring off.

Speaker 61 There's been back.

Speaker 8 Okay, so who are these two bald guys?

Speaker 16 I don't know.

Speaker 3 But they're clearly not supposed to be there because look at this random woman just laughing. She's like, who the fuck invited these guys at the party?

Speaker 40 She's like, I'm the one who told.

Speaker 15 I'm the one who told.

Speaker 16 They're like, yeah, bro.

Speaker 37 Wedding ring.

Speaker 3 We got into the valley party, bro. Can't believe it.
Janet's like, who are these men? Why are they in my party right now? I am disgusted.

Speaker 28 Does Janet have one outfit that's not terrible?

Speaker 5 Please.

Speaker 22 I'm not even a fashion gay. Like, I don't sit here and stare at everybody's fashions, but come on, you guys.
Like, I live in the valley now.

Speaker 26 I'm going to need some more effort put in.

Speaker 22 And I'm an old Navy gay.

Speaker 25 And even I'm like, girl, come on now.

Speaker 41 Why?

Speaker 53 And this, I don't expect much from the men, though, I have to say.

Speaker 3 I love the girl on the right. I mean, she's one of us.
She's like, I got into it. I can't believe it.
I got into the show. I'm here.
There's douchebags around. Janet's wearing something terrible.

Speaker 3 I cannot wait to tell my friends.

Speaker 50 She's like, how is this on television?

Speaker 22 Who is this guy? He looks familiar, though.

Speaker 39 This bald guy.

Speaker 3 He looks like he should be in one of those Sonic commercials.

Speaker 3 You know, for the drama.

Speaker 15 He looks like the old guy who dances for six flags.

Speaker 42 You know, those old commercials.

Speaker 50 Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.

Speaker 17 Or like Michael Darby.

Speaker 3 These two guys definitely have Michael Darby energy.

Speaker 10 Yeah.

Speaker 61 There's been the background of Danny getting wasted and handsy and inappropriate.

Speaker 22 Oh, there's a background of Danny getting wasted and handsy and inappropriate.

Speaker 47 Oh,

Speaker 68 so now she's like, we knew that would happen.

Speaker 57 How could you get that wasted and alcoholic and inappropriate, Danny?

Speaker 34 And he's like, it's because every time I go try to read a book, they're all red.

Speaker 10 It just makes me want to

Speaker 5 drink and get handsy with somebody.

Speaker 3 I don't want to know what's happened with Mexico today.

Speaker 53 Yeah, do you know what happened with Mexico yesterday?

Speaker 60 I love you.

Speaker 17 Comfort your advice, my boobs.

Speaker 3 Well, that's what I wanted to be.

Speaker 60 That's what comforts me.

Speaker 9 Brittany, there's no other option.

Speaker 26 So Brittany is hugging.

Speaker 23 Zach is sitting down and she puts his boobs in his face.

Speaker 26 And she's like, come here, hug mama.

Speaker 36 She's like, hey, you got your boobs and you got your face and my boobs.

Speaker 57 Where else are they going to go, Brittany? Your boobs take up half the room.

Speaker 3 Brittany, and she's got some sort of like some sort of kerchief in her hair, like a ribbon of some sort, that then her ponytail.

Speaker 3 I don't know what you call it when you do your ponytail like that, where it's like a bunch of different balls dangling down.

Speaker 3 but then she's in a bright orange dress. She's definitely giving a lot of different looks and patterns all at once.

Speaker 26 I think they're going to Mexico for July 4th.

Speaker 23 And so she just put that red, white, and blue thing in her hair.

Speaker 3 That's my guess. That would make sense.
Yeah.

Speaker 10 And he's like, I'm not going to wear red, white, and blue, but I am white, so I'll wear teal or like a dark aqua.

Speaker 10 And I'm halfway there.

Speaker 14 Yeah.

Speaker 3 It's just such an honor to finally be invited onto the cast trip.

Speaker 37 Brittany's like, I'm going to dress like they dress in America, like a pumpkin i'm gonna wear american flag in my hair but also wear a little bit of light blue too just because it's fun yeah

Speaker 26 you're exhausting you give parent energy and i'm done with it my husband's not the one good for her jasmine telling off who i'm assuming is janet because she says you give karen energy right yeah oh i thought she said you give parent energy i was like wow but karen energy that makes much more sense let's see energy and i'm done with it oh missed it let's go back a little more

Speaker 61 you're exhausting you give karen energy and i'm done with it my husband's not the one out here grabbing asses

Speaker 47 wow

Speaker 37 wow

Speaker 30 this year my god so janet sitting in front of a casa amigo sign is like yeah well my husband's not the one out here grabbing asses and jason's like oh

Speaker 3 could be i mean is this have they turned um well it looks like the big sign on the back says brits of have they turned jaxes into Brits? Is that the whole thing?

Speaker 41 And there's no, he still has Jaxes in the Val, but she has Brits now in the Lisa Vanderpump Disneyland of West Hollywood.

Speaker 28 She opened a place called Brits on that street.

Speaker 3 That's right. Yeah, because look and look at it.
There's this Casamigo sign and then like a poster of her like printed out from like a Hewlett-Packard and taped onto the Casamigo sign. So

Speaker 3 it's doing great on this game.

Speaker 41 I'm gonna get home like, god damn it.

Speaker 35 I can't be everywhere at once. You you know?

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Speaker 61 The one out here grabbing asses.

Speaker 6 Uh-oh, Sonia's like, how dare you?

Speaker 41 They're like in the El Compadre.

Speaker 6 She's like, how dare you?

Speaker 57 Do you know how hard it is not to eat the shell on this taco salad without listening to you talk about my husband?

Speaker 3 The fact that you're talking about my husband when I put

Speaker 3 so much research into finding out what's happening in Mexico today. And here we are in Mexico, I'm ready.
And now you're going to ruin this moment.

Speaker 57 Mexico today.

Speaker 6 People are being mean to my husband.

Speaker 20 Brittany's roots just keep getting longer and longer in

Speaker 32 every episode. I love it.

Speaker 49 Okay.

Speaker 17 You.

Speaker 60 What happened, Janet? What's your name? You're

Speaker 58 drunk.

Speaker 50 Okay, so I love that she tells Janet, fuck you and Lisa.

Speaker 23 Look at stupid Janet. She's like,

Speaker 41 it's supposed to be my birthday at the bank today, but I guess we're just going to all ignore that.

Speaker 6 Well, here goes Janet.

Speaker 3 Not give me at the bank again.

Speaker 3 Michelle's like, is anyone else disturbed that I match all of the plates on the table?

Speaker 37 This lady buys.

Speaker 3 I decided to dress like shredded iceberg lettuce.

Speaker 37 What'd you say?

Speaker 26 Sorry, what were you saying? We got.

Speaker 3 I was saying that Michelle's like, I decided to dress the same color palette as iceberg lettuce today

Speaker 26 i was saying this lady's walking behind them like i'm not clearing that table these fuckers aren't tipping me anyway they never

Speaker 3 definitely not yeah definitely not look how messy that table is

Speaker 10 okay so let's see

Speaker 46 you're

Speaker 69 drunk well she's a hooker so it's fine oh my god

Speaker 3 these two are gonna be great to watch some two are like you're a fucking drunk and jesse says well she's a hooker whoa oh my god Yeah, these two are going to be like the Edward Alby duo of the season.

Speaker 3 They're just going to be going Loblo.

Speaker 32 They're really going there this year.

Speaker 69 She's a hooker, so it's fine. I'm the mother of your fing Channel.

Speaker 3 This is why I

Speaker 10 well, I mean, damn.

Speaker 47 Wow. Wow.

Speaker 21 It's getting darker to me, too.

Speaker 6 She's like, I am screaming behind my goal weight.

Speaker 46 How dare you?

Speaker 43 How are they getting this whole shot of her from behind an umbrella?

Speaker 33 An umbrella pole.

Speaker 3 How did they not swiftly just like get around that?

Speaker 2 Like, how do they center that umbrella pole on the shot?

Speaker 3 Come on now.

Speaker 3 I am the mother of your child.

Speaker 6 I am the pole of your child.

Speaker 57 How dare you?

Speaker 6 I keep this family sheltered from rain and sun.

Speaker 3 Yeah, these two are disasters. Great.

Speaker 26 I just love that this show is like, okay, congrats.

Speaker 8 You had a great first season.

Speaker 32 We're giving you even less money for the next season.

Speaker 27 We're giving you a cameraman who's in film school, freshman, and

Speaker 32 $5 to shop at the Joann's Fabrics for your costumes for the rest of the year.

Speaker 37 The clearance, since they're going out of business.

Speaker 37 The mother of your

Speaker 3 child. This is why I feel crazy 24-7.

Speaker 58 I've never blacked out and hurt my friends.

Speaker 33 I can't.

Speaker 41 That's all we get of Zach. They're like, and now Zach, hair,

Speaker 18 somewhat more natural and lifelike than before.

Speaker 5 And he's like, this is why I feel fucking crazy. 24-7.

Speaker 3 That's it. So now

Speaker 3 he has an even newer look. He has like a pompadour going on in the shot.

Speaker 3 There's a pompadour there.

Speaker 3 And then

Speaker 3 he goes right to like backwards cap, which is, I don't know, something is, that's a lot of hair to cram under that cap, I have to say.

Speaker 41 It's a lot. He does have a lot of hair.

Speaker 35 His hair actually looks really nice here in this one.

Speaker 53 I'm so jealous.

Speaker 3 He's nice. It's like very like Alan thick, right?

Speaker 55 Yeah. Very thick hair.

Speaker 22 Okay, so let's...

Speaker 9 Please stop Ed.

Speaker 58 I've never blacked out and hurt my friends.

Speaker 15 Oh, okay.

Speaker 28 So now we're now we're judging each other like on how shitty we are.

Speaker 10 Okay.

Speaker 8 So

Speaker 23 you are fine for now, except your beard is going to get out of control.

Speaker 55 I'm telling you right now, Luke.

Speaker 3 And then

Speaker 3 is he wearing a shirt that says Valley Crew?

Speaker 34 Yeah.

Speaker 10 He's a little on the nose, stupid.

Speaker 34 He's branding what we're already watching.

Speaker 41 He hasn't figured out like you're supposed to brand another business.

Speaker 9 He's wearing that.

Speaker 25 And then, Jason, you're taking off your wedding ring to flirt with other people.

Speaker 55 Don't blame you.

Speaker 35 I mean, you're married to Janet.

Speaker 25 And now we're going to judge somebody because he blacks out occasionally.

Speaker 6 Come on.

Speaker 9 He's like, I'll go to church.

Speaker 16 I've got 405.

Speaker 7 405. I'm trying to figure out where they're eating.

Speaker 3 There's a lot of these like little French fries on all the glasses and on the paper wrappers. Is that a place that we should know about?

Speaker 7 H ⁇ H?

Speaker 36 Is it H-H? H-H?

Speaker 53 I don't know. Is that what it says? I can't tell.

Speaker 5 I want to go there.

Speaker 3 It looks delicious.

Speaker 5 Johnny Rockets? No. What is that?

Speaker 3 I want to get a basket of fries and

Speaker 3 a beer and a little condiment in one of those little containers on the side.

Speaker 37 Who's stopping, you buddy?

Speaker 10 Who is that?

Speaker 47 And I want to have

Speaker 3 a cup of water that because it's free, they give you a really tiny cup for. So you have to go go back.

Speaker 21 Oh, is that what it is?

Speaker 17 I thought that was a shot.

Speaker 3 I think that's just like that's just water on the side. So, you know, you're like, oh, I've got to go refill it 10 times because they will only give me the smallest cup.

Speaker 32 I know, bastards.

Speaker 44 Okay.

Speaker 22 And Jason's like, listen, I make a lot of effort.

Speaker 30 I've eaten the least amount of fry sauce as all of you.

Speaker 9 So I don't know why I'm getting in trouble.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he has a lot of fries left in his basket. Everyone else went all through theirs, but his are so high there.
You can see them above the paper.

Speaker 41 Yeah, he's the best body here. So he's like, I'm not eating these these fries and I'm only having a sip of beer.

Speaker 27 So he is suck at fry sauce.

Speaker 3 He's like, I see Jax. I see Jesse.
I'm not going to become one of them.

Speaker 47 I will only eat one fry.

Speaker 58 I'm going to blocked out and hurt my friends.

Speaker 62 I can't take it.

Speaker 60 I want to scream.

Speaker 6 God dang it.

Speaker 55 That's how we talk in the valley.

Speaker 14 Like, God dang it.

Speaker 33 I don't want to scream.

Speaker 40 God dang it. And he is like, yeah, me too.

Speaker 46 Me too.

Speaker 14 Me too.

Speaker 16 Especially.

Speaker 10 Ooh, look who's here.

Speaker 47 Other Logan.

Speaker 22 Lala is going to ruin this show.

Speaker 26 I'm calling it right now.

Speaker 16 Why would they let Lala on here?

Speaker 3 Brittany just won something at

Speaker 3 Dave and Buster's, it looks like.

Speaker 9 Won't crash.

Speaker 17 Okay.

Speaker 30 No, this is not as classy as the Dave and Buster's, wherever this is.

Speaker 10 Let's see.

Speaker 60 You don't know what I come from. We had to like get cans out of trash cans to like pay rent.
I had to stick my car at the parking lot where I worked.

Speaker 12 I would get in line.

Speaker 10 Just kidding.

Speaker 26 But I love that they're getting, she's like crying.

Speaker 6 She's like, you guys don't know how poor I was growing up.

Speaker 41 And they're getting a private chef catered dinner with like cooperation.

Speaker 3 Well, also, guys, they're in the dessert course, it looks like. And this looks like it's some sort of fruit boat, like maybe like an ice cream element.

Speaker 3 And they're all like, Nia, this is nice, but our ice cream is melting.

Speaker 32 We have to start eating.

Speaker 39 Oh, I thought this was like a caprese.

Speaker 56 Because see all the pretty.

Speaker 3 Oh, you know what? I think it's a caprese.

Speaker 21 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I think it's caprezi.

Speaker 12 Either way,

Speaker 57 could you wait till we get to our dessert?

Speaker 37 I mean, yeah, we have to cry about a second.

Speaker 40 Give it a second.

Speaker 53 Janet's like, I wore another terrible outfit for this, so why do we have to concentrate on you being poor?

Speaker 14 Okay.

Speaker 5 All right, let's see.

Speaker 3 Michelle Lolly is like,

Speaker 3 Michelle Lolly's like, I just climbed out of the well and went taxing through our television. How is your day going?

Speaker 17 So, like, he ran.

Speaker 60 I i had to sleep in my car at the parking lot where i work

Speaker 63 he has people watching me

Speaker 16 oh no

Speaker 67 so we go to brittany's house and but first of all this the way they transition she's like i had to sleep in my car after work and then it transitions into brittany holding her baby like that's cold you guys uh so britney's standing by a box that says bread i was gonna say i wonder why they keep the bread in this house

Speaker 26 And she's holding the baby, who's, I think, got a mullet, which I don't approve of. And then it goes into that recording TV filter.

Speaker 23 And she says, Jax has people watching me.

Speaker 7 So he put cameras in that. I mean, that doesn't look like a hidden camera.

Speaker 26 So he's just like tapping into the cameras and watching them.

Speaker 21 I guess so.

Speaker 51 Daniels is watching me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 37 Meanwhile, there's a camera through there.

Speaker 16 Yeah.

Speaker 59 So much, my husband.

Speaker 63 We have to attack me because you're going through stuff.

Speaker 69 Michelle and I are the most sane people in this whole house.

Speaker 17 That's a f ⁇ ing.

Speaker 48 Oh, God. This show really goes off the wire.

Speaker 27 So Jax is watching Britney through the cameras.

Speaker 25 He's pulling a Ralph.

Speaker 52 And Brittany is still into rope art.

Speaker 32 I'm not really sure what this is.

Speaker 21 Yeah.

Speaker 21 Big rope just hanging there in the back.

Speaker 33 Yeah.

Speaker 25 And then she comes for Mia.

Speaker 18 And Nia's like, oh, oh, you don't get to cry about going through a hard time.

Speaker 52 And that's why you're coming for me.

Speaker 28 Except I think that that's probably why Nia was just crying over her caprazy, like trying to get them to stop coming for her because she went through hard times.

Speaker 3 So it's going to be like a trauma Olympics, which, you know, is is very very nowadays guys and it's a little draft it's drafty in this house because she's wearing a blanket and then we go to jesse and he's also wearing a blanket um so maybe they're like in big bear or something like that they're somewhere cold because he's wearing the same blanket although no one else seems to be cold just jesse and nia

Speaker 28 jesse's just hanging out with the camera crew watching it's like behind the tent

Speaker 35 yeah exactly just watching the women shoot their scene yeah it's like we're the most normal out of all these people shell and i are the most sane people in this whole house.

Speaker 60 Yes, I'm going through some shit. I just want you to be there for me.

Speaker 59 That's all I want, Kristen.

Speaker 37 Oh, poor.

Speaker 3 It's always the dudes. When the wife is pregnant, the dudes are like, I just need someone to be there for me.
You don't have a child inside of you right now.

Speaker 56 Yeah, she's like, I'm holding a baby with a beard inside of me, and I've had this braid on for like an entire year or so.

Speaker 3 I put the braid on it because Nia said that's what was happening in Mexico today.

Speaker 59 For me, that's all I want, Kristen.

Speaker 61 You should reason it's it's crazy Kristen, not crazy Janet.

Speaker 58 Done with them. Don't make

Speaker 6 so now Luke's like, I'm going to walk around the hotel in my underwear.

Speaker 57 I'm very upset.

Speaker 12 No, Luke. This isn't Montana.

Speaker 40 Get your ass back inside.

Speaker 25 Nobody at this nice hotel to watch you walk around in your fucking Haines.

Speaker 37 Yeah, put on a robe.

Speaker 3 Come on now.

Speaker 61 She's a reason it's crazy Kristen, not crazy Janet.

Speaker 25 For some reason, it's crazy Christian, not crazy Janet.

Speaker 28 Oh, Janet's going to be a victim this year.

Speaker 9 Now, who's this?

Speaker 17 Hey, there's that new girl.

Speaker 3 That's that same one from that dinner party. Remember, we're like, who is that? Where I thought for a second was Nia.

Speaker 29 Yeah, why aren't they telling us who she is?

Speaker 42 That's so weird. Who is she?

Speaker 17 Our crazy Janet.

Speaker 58 Done with that.

Speaker 3 Was she the girl who was smiling at us? She wasn't the girl who was smiling at us, was she?

Speaker 14 No.

Speaker 33 Okay.

Speaker 27 This is a different girl.

Speaker 15 So then

Speaker 9 on a boat, Brittany's in the captain's hat.

Speaker 21 Brittany, she's like, I got a knife.

Speaker 3 This knife isn't as good as the knife I got at home to eat my takeout, but it'll do.

Speaker 27 And Zach looks crazy.

Speaker 26 He's making that face of the Kravitz neighbor always spying on Bewitched.

Speaker 17 What's going on over here?

Speaker 59 He's like, this is on. I can't take one more fucking second of the shot.
I can't take a...

Speaker 58 Don't watch that.

Speaker 63 Don't make me knock your ass out.

Speaker 60 Knock me out.

Speaker 3 Brittany's wearing a little sailor cap.

Speaker 16 Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Speaker 26 Wait, first of all, what?

Speaker 3 Brittany's wearing a little sailor cap and

Speaker 45 a lay.

Speaker 3 But she's also like got her fork and a knife. She's like, she's ready to eat her meal too.
And then there's some random dude next to her to stop eating her meal to fight.

Speaker 9 She's like, I'm in the middle of a bite, sir.

Speaker 31 So then Janet is about to get in a fight with, who is that that's fighting with Janet?

Speaker 5 I can't tell who it is.

Speaker 26 Hold on, let's listen to it. It's very important.

Speaker 58 Done with them.

Speaker 63 Don't make me knock your ass out.

Speaker 60 Knock me out.

Speaker 10 Oh, someone says,

Speaker 26 don't make me knock your ass out.

Speaker 30 It's whoever's in an orange dress.

Speaker 17 It sounds like Michelle.

Speaker 3 Kristen, I think, says, you're a fan.

Speaker 26 Oh, okay. So she's like, don't knock me, make me knock you out, bitch.
And Janet says, knock me out.

Speaker 23 And she goes, you're a fan, bitch.

Speaker 8 Which is true because she got into all these people by being a personal assistant to Sheena.

Speaker 25 That's where Janet came from.

Speaker 22 And then she just kind of like kept climbing her way until she ended up badly dressed on this show.

Speaker 52 I've never seen someone climb a ladder this high and stay in rayon the whole time.

Speaker 45 I've got to give him credit

Speaker 3 and also clearly no jax on this trip jax is really missing from a

Speaker 3 bunch of this entire trailer it's wild yeah

Speaker 60 fan

Speaker 3 that was terrible husband good father i'm a great father terrible husband yeah

Speaker 16 You are not a great father.

Speaker 8 How can you be a great father if you're a terrible husband?

Speaker 64 You are not a good father, sir.

Speaker 23 You had Brittany and your child move out of the house so you could stay there.

Speaker 41 Yeah. That's not a good father.

Speaker 41 We saw.

Speaker 37 We saw how hands-on.

Speaker 3 We saw how hands-on you were. You were not,

Speaker 3 you were barely doing anything over there.

Speaker 26 And look at what sweatshirt he's wearing while he says that.

Speaker 41 Violent. It says violent.
Yeah. It's probably violent

Speaker 32 or something.

Speaker 3 And then, of course, Tom Schwartz.

Speaker 3 A little dollop of Tom Schwartz and the entire thing.

Speaker 21 He's like, yeah, yeah, man.

Speaker 33 Yeah. Or great dad.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 What's your dad? What's your daughter's name again?

Speaker 3 He's like, I don't know.

Speaker 48 Do stuff with your daughter.

Speaker 25 The valley, all new season, April 15th.

Speaker 3 Wow.

Speaker 10 Great to see. Well, we'll be there.

Speaker 3 Absolutely. We will be.
I can't wait. It's going to be, it looks like a really good season.

Speaker 17 Oh, yeah. It's going to be fun.

Speaker 32 I'm glad Janet's going to get hers.

Speaker 35 And all the men are going down. Damn.

Speaker 48 All the men except Luke.

Speaker 35 Look like they're going down this year.

Speaker 40 All right. Well, this was a fun one.

Speaker 23 Thanks, everybody, so much for being here.

Speaker 20 We will talk to you next week, okay?

Speaker 33 Bye, everyone.

Speaker 72 Watch what Crap-Ins would like to thank its premium sponsors.

Speaker 74 Ain't no thing like Allison King.

Speaker 1 Our way is the Amber Way. It's the Foster and the Furious.

Speaker 74 It's Amanda Foster.

Speaker 4 It's always automatic with Ashley Otto.

Speaker 1 Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney.

Speaker 74 Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

Speaker 75 Catherine D. Bernardo has our hearto.

Speaker 1 Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offa. Dana C.
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She's a Daniela. Itchels.
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Speaker 73 Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no tricholis. Jamie, she has no less namie.

Speaker 2 You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones.

Speaker 4 I go, Hugo, we all go for Hugo.

Speaker 1 Hava Nagila Weber.

Speaker 75 We could all learn from Jennifer Kearns.

Speaker 1 She's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer.

Speaker 71 Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch.

Speaker 11 Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Manock's door.

Speaker 52 She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

Speaker 1 Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B.

Speaker 74 Rigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett.

Speaker 1 She gets a name from us, it's Lindsay D.

Speaker 1 Let's give a kiss a Reno to Lisa Lino.

Speaker 1 Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox.

Speaker 1 Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the burg.

Speaker 75 This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian.

Speaker 1 I love a ya, Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson.

Speaker 75 She sure is swell, it's it's Raquel.

Speaker 1 Yes, we canna, it's Savannah.

Speaker 11 Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman.

Speaker 3 Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

Speaker 75 The Bay Area Betches, Betches.

Speaker 1 And our super premium sponsors. She's V V I P, it's Amanda V.
Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

Speaker 73 Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.

Speaker 75 She's got a leg up, it's Beth Ani.

Speaker 1 We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

Speaker 75 Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neal.

Speaker 1 Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides.

Speaker 75 Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland.

Speaker 1 It's our queen, it's queen Laifa.

Speaker 74 Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall.

Speaker 1 Know your worth with Jason Kurt.

Speaker 75 We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch.

Speaker 4 She's a little bit loony, Junie.

Speaker 75 My favorite Murdoch, Karen McMurdo.

Speaker 1 She gets an A, it's Kelly B.

Speaker 72 We love him madly.

Speaker 75 It's Kyle Pod Shadley.

Speaker 72 We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder-Baron.

Speaker 9 She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthey.

Speaker 72 Always killing it, it's Lola Alcalani.

Speaker 1 The incredible, edible Matthew Sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St.
Rose.

Speaker 73 Give him hell, Miss Noel.

Speaker 75 She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke.

Speaker 40 Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony.

Speaker 11 Let's take off with Tam Laplain.

Speaker 1 She ain't no shrinking Violet Koutar.

Speaker 1 We love you guys.

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Speaker 62 Picture this.

Speaker 76 You're standing on the beach when you notice something strange. The horizon doesn't look right.
At first, all you can see is a thin white line stretching as far as your eyes can see.

Speaker 76 Then, the line starts to rise. But it's not the horizon at all.
It's a wave, a 30-foot wall of water, and it's racing straight toward you.

Speaker 76 On the day after Christmas in 2004, a 9.1 magnitude earthquake hit off the coast of Indonesia, triggering a devastating tsunami. It struck Thailand without warning.

Speaker 76 No alarms, no cell phone alerts, no evacuation.

Speaker 76 In this season of Against the Odds, experience one of the deadliest natural disasters in history through the perspectives of those who did everything they could to survive.

Speaker 76 Follow Against the Odds on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Against the Odds Tsunami in Thailand early and ad-free right now on Wondery Plus.