#3072 Below Deck Med S10E07 Part Two: The Blah-chelor

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Speaker 1 Hi everyone, welcome back.

Speaker 2 This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe so that way you always get your episodes.

Speaker 2 But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. Meanwhile, Brooke, who's one of the women, is talking about her poodle.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah, Brooke is the Harvard one. Okay, poodle.
I was wondering, I couldn't understand what she said. So it was poodle.
This is what she was talking about.

Speaker 2 So she's telling Joe about her poodle and she goes, she's like, have you ever had much interaction with the poodle? They're really geniuses. He speaks English.
Like, actually, he knows so many words.

Speaker 2 And he was, and Nathan is like fixing something behind her. And he just looks at the camera.
He does like a full gym from the office. He looks at the camera like, what?

Speaker 1 What is happening here?

Speaker 2 And by the way, Brooke is such a poodle owner because

Speaker 2 poodle people say this shit all the time. They're so smart.
They're like the smartest dogs. I'm like, I literally don't care how smart your dog is.

Speaker 2 I am not asking your dog to write a dissertation for me. Just get it off my lap.

Speaker 1 I've also never seen proof of this being true. And I've known a lot of poodles.
But poodle owners are like, oh, my God, poodles are brilliant. Poodles can do your taxes.

Speaker 2 Poodles are the most annoying fucking dog there ever is.

Speaker 1 You don't like poodles.

Speaker 1 You always did a poodle.

Speaker 2 Like a big poodle. Like

Speaker 2 The tall ones are just inconsolable. I just, I, they're awful.

Speaker 1 They're awful.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry. They are awful.
They are so,

Speaker 2 they are up in your business all the time. They're always dumping on you.
They're always being loud. And they just, they just bark.
They just, they're bossy.

Speaker 2 Like the little French, like the little toy poodles are fine. They're fine.
But this, the big ones, I'm just like, oh my God, get out of my face, please.

Speaker 1 I mean, I like a poodle okay, but I just don't think that they're

Speaker 1 these brilliant dogs. They're like, oh, my God, put a piano in front of my poodle.
It will play Beethoven. I'm telling you, it's amazing.
Poodles are amazing.

Speaker 1 I think it's maybe the people who get the poodles that are annoying. Maybe because they like get them.
Maybe they cock them. They can say they have brilliant dogs.
I just don't get it.

Speaker 1 You know the best dogs? Vichlas. They're such bitches.
They're like, I'm hot.

Speaker 1 They're like, I'm hot. You're stupid.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Hungarian Vichlas. They're like, you're stupid.
Like, if a dog had a

Speaker 1 Vichlas. Oh, they're great.
They're like, you're stupid. Look, we all look the same and we all look better than you, stupid hit.

Speaker 2 They are great.

Speaker 2 In fact, I just saw a video of like two Vishlas playing with an automatic

Speaker 2 ball fetcher machine.

Speaker 2 And they were so excited because what happens is the machine just like spits out a ball and they go and they get the ball and they bring it back and they dump it into the machine and the machine spits it out again.

Speaker 2 And those two dogs were so excited. See, like I can be warm and loving and find joy in dogs.
It's just the poodles. The poodles, I don't.
I almost wonder, is it a dog owner thing?

Speaker 2 Do like poodle owners, because they're so obsessed with a dog being smart, do they treat them a little differently? Do they like coddle them? Do they spoil them?

Speaker 2 And so as a result, the dog just like runs roughshod all over the place.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, it's like the kids with parents who are like, you are the smartest, most gorgeous person in this school.

Speaker 1 You are going to get out of this car and you are going to win it everything because you are the best. Your hair must be perfect.
Your grades must be perfect. Everything must be perfect.

Speaker 1 Now go to that fucking school and you make me proud. And then those kids are always assholes.
And then they end up on some charter after a heroin addiction. And they're like, you know what?

Speaker 1 This all went bad because my parents demanded perfection. And, you know, they're curling their hair really tightly.
And you're like, oh, my God, they're becoming a poodle. Stop them.
Stop them.

Speaker 1 And then you've got this dummy on the boat like, oh, my God, my poodle is so smart. And it's just like some shaky person in the back with a really tight perm, like, my parents ruined me.

Speaker 2 Well,

Speaker 2 so I guess I'm glad we drilled down because once again,

Speaker 2 blaming the dog for probably the owner's fault.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's never the animal's fault. It's never the animal's fault.
Okay, so I know that.

Speaker 2 I know that. But like, but to be fair, some dogs are more hyperactive than others and poodles are one of them.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
Okay. So Brooke's like, yeah, so poodles, they're amazing.
And my ex and I broke up right before the pandemic. Let me tell you something.
That man was not a poodle. Okay.

Speaker 1 And yeah, it's nuts. And then I've been gluten-free since I was 16.
So that's something you should know. Big into GF.
That's what we call it. It's like the inside nerve for it, GF, you know?

Speaker 1 By the way, have you touched anything that had G in it today? Because please, if you have, do not touch me. It's just a thing.
It's just one of my things.

Speaker 2 I'm gluten-free, but I'm also glue-free. I will not go near Elmer's, nor will I read anything by

Speaker 2 Elmore Leonard, which is sort of

Speaker 1 big on staples, huge on staples. No glue.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 1 his little head pop up from behind because he's spying on them from the stairs. And he's just looking so cute.
Like, what the fuck?

Speaker 2 It was generally his cutest moment he's ever had.

Speaker 2 So people are doing stuff. Anna is first wrapping still.

Speaker 2 And Joe, the deckhand Joe, goes up to Kids and he goes, you smell really nice.

Speaker 1 He's like,

Speaker 2 I don't smell sweaty, do I?

Speaker 1 It's like, no, that's what I like.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 I vomit in my mouth. So now the women are changing because they're going to be getting ready for their evening activities.
And Josh is saying

Speaker 2 that, like, one thing that's tricky for him is that there are, there's someone who's Brooke is gluten-free, as we know, because she's been since she's 16.

Speaker 2 And then Anna's gluten-free and Mary Lee is lactose intolerant. And he's like,

Speaker 2 I hope this guy finds love, but also I hope he kicks off the dietary preference people first.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So then Joe and Max are still dancing around on the boat and Max and V are taking a break.

Speaker 1 And so we go to Max in his cabin speaking French and he's like, oh, you see, there were two guys that got fired, which was good because they were injured.

Speaker 1 But now there's a new guy who come and he's the best friend of my boss. I'm here.
I'm left a little out. You see, it is like Mother's Day, Father's Day, all at the same time.
Oh, I count male man.

Speaker 1 Man.

Speaker 2 He's turning into a French Patsy Klein song. So then

Speaker 2 Nathan's telling Joe they're going gonna get the Chetskis out and everything. And Captain Sandy's looking around and she goes, for the first time, this is notable, the first time ever, Sandy goes,

Speaker 2 probably should have never put out the toys in the first place.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 2 Captain Sandy, queen of, as soon as we even look at the anchor, I want five toys out in the ocean. Okay, always be toying.
Always be toying.

Speaker 1 So now there's masquerade masks, masquerade masks coming out for dinner. And Aisha puts one on.
She's like,

Speaker 1 so Captain Sandy's just loving this whole dating thing. She's like, Aisha, Aisha, who do you think he's going to end up with? She's like, I don't know.
There's a few good options.

Speaker 1 I reckon Leah, Alicia, or Ashley. I mean, there's one who's gluten-free.
I'm tempted just to give her a little pizza crust just to get this party started.

Speaker 1 And Sandy's like, wow, I could never do what Joe's doing in a million years. Before Leah, I never went on official dates.
And then we see a picture, and the picture's Leah, and she's like, baby.

Speaker 2 She is the baby filter.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 You know, I was a captain. I was always at sea.

Speaker 1 I would have sea dates.

Speaker 2 I would just be like, hey, Poseidon, come and meet me over here. Just kidding.
I'm a lesbian. I didn't really have time for a relationship.
And then I met Leah.

Speaker 2 She is my person for the rest of my life.

Speaker 1 Hold on one second. Hey.

Speaker 1 Hey, baby. Baby.

Speaker 2 Is Bear there?

Speaker 1 Bear's here, baby.

Speaker 1 You know what Bear said? He said that you're cute. Oh my God.
I'm sorry. Did I say cute? I meant to say sexy, baby.
You're so sexy.

Speaker 2 Hey, little bear.

Speaker 2 Okay, me.

Speaker 1 Oh, so good to see you. So good to see you.

Speaker 2 Who do you think Joe's gonna pick? I'm so beside myself. I can't even, I got to tell everyone.
Who's Joe gonna pick? Who do you think, little bear?

Speaker 1 Well, if he's smart, he's gonna pick you, but unfortunately, you're tanking, baby. You're the best woman on that boat, baby.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, you're right. Okay.

Speaker 2 Hey, don't forget to wash my caprice before I get home. Love ya.

Speaker 1 Love you, baby.

Speaker 1 So we go to Josh and Kathy in the galley, and she's sweaty. And so we ask her what, asks her what got her into yachting.
And she's like, well, I was a

Speaker 1 surgical maxilliness. Maxillinis.

Speaker 1 Like, you know, teeth. I don't really know how to say it.
I'm sorry. I didn't graduate from Harvard, personally, but I was a surgical maxillius like teeth.

Speaker 1 It's a person who loves teeth, but hates their son's name, Max, okay?

Speaker 1 And I specialized in bottis bone grating implantology. That's where we put breasts into mouths.

Speaker 1 So you'll see sometimes people smiling and when they open their teeth, you see that there are actually a wall of breasts there. It's actually quite attractive to some people.

Speaker 1 So I did that for a while, but then I realized I was just bending over all day, you know, and it hurt my back.

Speaker 1 And I said, ow, and I went to the doctor and he said, actually, two of your spine thingies are touching each other. And so I had to quit.
And then I became a maid.

Speaker 1 And I decided I'm going to be the best maid in the world and I'm going to be the chop chief stew within two years, which I did. I've accomplished that.
So it's wonderful.

Speaker 1 By the way, your teeth could do some breasts on it. Have you ever considered that?

Speaker 2 I was, so I was confused because you told Josh, i guess so she used to do like um

Speaker 2 bone grafting implanting on teeth or like teeth implants or she did something with bones and she was doing surgeries but then the story she tells us also is that she went to football practice which and then

Speaker 2 like

Speaker 2 she stepped something i was like i just i'm confused how the two i don't think she's lying i just i'm confused about how the football practice and the bone thing it all mixed together but she almost what didn't walk or whatever but she came in with a pretty big and intense backstory where she's like, I was almost paralyzed and I used all my willpower to move my toe.

Speaker 2 And I just love that. Kizzy's is like,

Speaker 2 I like to dance and I'm really good at dancing.

Speaker 1 Kizzy's like, I was always the lead in plays. That's hers.
I was the most

Speaker 1 in the school. I was the prettiest.
I was the lead in every play. And hers.

Speaker 1 I was a surgeon for teeth and broken teeth and booby teeth. And then I hurt myself playing sports at the highest level possible because I was bent over trying to save people.

Speaker 1 And now I almost died, but I've moved my toe. And now I'm here with my golden squeezy in hand.

Speaker 1 Never do dental surgery while playing football.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 2 I don't understand, but it was impressive, but I didn't understand it. It was impressive.

Speaker 1 I think she hurt her back. I think it...
She was mentioning football because it shouldn't have hurt her back.

Speaker 1 But the reason it hurt her back is because when you're working on teeth all day, you're hunched over. Hunched over, and it ended up hurting her back and destroying her back.

Speaker 1 And so that's why she left.

Speaker 2 That's so scary.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 yeah, that's why I don't fix teeth. Okay, lesson learned.
Okay, y'all. So now Bachelor Joe is talking to Aisha, and he's like, Wow, you have such a beautiful name.
It's like, oh, oh,

Speaker 1 oh,

Speaker 1 okay.

Speaker 2 All right, that's great.

Speaker 1 Okay. So then, uh, sounds like he's opening a garage door to hell.
She's just like,

Speaker 2 You just dipped into another dishwasher, bubble bath. So, so the women are getting ready,

Speaker 2 and Leah is saying, They just need more time to figure out who this guy is. And Anna goes, Huh, I'm here for the yacht at the end of the day.
I'm not really here for the guy.

Speaker 2 I have plenty of those in New York.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 and I don't blame her, but at least pretend. You know, we're all here,

Speaker 1 ma'am. So they all look at her like Rose.

Speaker 1 So then Aisha and the Joes are talking, and

Speaker 1 Bachelor Joe is saying he's having a great, who cares? So then we go to Brooke saying she doesn't know how she's going to choose, or Joe doesn't know how, God, I'm so sorry, you guys.

Speaker 1 Joe's like, I don't know how I'm going to choose, but it's going to be so hard. And now it's dinner time.
Everybody gets all fancy.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 what's or buns, kathy is trying to figure out drawers and everything's broken and everything's a piece of shit in there and kathy is going to fix everything okay guys yeah and she's like kizzy kizzy come could you come here you see this bed does this look perfect to you yes it is thank you no it's not look at these wrinkles on the bed it's not proper it's not proper they're not going to come out unless we wet it let's please wet the wrinkles wet the wrinkles

Speaker 2 And she's just like, she's pointing out all these like little meticulous details everywhere. And Kizzy is just like zoning out.

Speaker 2 And so Kizzy tells us, I'm so used to having to fight for my place that it's like I see everyone, everything is competition. Growing up, I was always the lead in plays or always front and center.

Speaker 2 I know I'm not a better stew than Kathy. She's a good stew, but in the back of my head, that little dancer brain's going, she's front and center right now, and you should be front and center.

Speaker 1 You're not good enough.

Speaker 1 Like, okay. And this is where we see pictures of her like as the lead in a play and then doing something else where she's just winning.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 She's like a fizzful, like she's got like John Bonner Ramsey makeup and she's like dancing and whatever.

Speaker 2 It's actually hilarious.

Speaker 1 But she's like, all I hear is you're center stage and you're not good enough. And then it comes to Kathy and she's like, Kizzy, I can't stand when the caddies are put back with rubbish in them.

Speaker 1 Please empty the trash every time you pass one. Thank you.

Speaker 2 She's like, oh, so you think you're the Saudisher with your rubbish rules?

Speaker 1 She's like, as I said, when I played the lead Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, I hate when rubbish are in bitch. Oh, I'm the lead of the plays.
I'm the lead of the plays.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 2 meanwhile, so Kizzy is,

Speaker 2 they're looking at all this stuff, and Kizzy notices that as Kathy bends over, that there is the seam is popping on Kathy's butt.

Speaker 1 There's like a hole.

Speaker 2 It's big enough that you can really see it on camera from far away. Like it's definitely there.
It's undeniable. And Kizzy kind of like looks at the camera and is like, oh my God.

Speaker 2 And she says, I probably should say something.

Speaker 2 But she says nothing. In fact, she just lets, she lets Kathy just go about her business.
And I was like, it just was, to me, it was so obnoxious. It's this girl's first day here.

Speaker 2 She's about to be like guests facing, bringing stuff out.

Speaker 2 I just was like oh my god you are you are a mean person i don't care if she is not as villainous as others like you like that's that's just like shitty character right there and he did it on tv and and we all saw it yeah shame on you it's time for a commercial it's time for a crappin's commercial

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Speaker 1 So she, they're running plates and Josh is behind her and he's like, oh, you've got a rip in your ass. And I was like, well, who doesn't? What kind of thing is that to say? It's how asses are made.

Speaker 1 But it's the hole. It's a hole.
So she's like, oh my God. So she's trying to like walk backwards so no one sees her the hole in her butt and um kizzy's like pee hee i didn't even know about the rip

Speaker 1 she'll never get joe now

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 2 so shady so um and kathy's like i've been in cabins for a few hours with kizzy bending over and then she hasn't even noticed i'm watching her maybe this is her game plan maybe she liked what she saw like okay let's settle down kathy well she got it though She's true.

Speaker 1 So then Ashley's like, so do you cook, Joe? And he's like, yeah, I actually don't mind it. You know, I got a nice little kitchen set up at the house.
Yeah, my kids like to cook, which is great.

Speaker 1 I've got kids. You guys know that, right? And they're like, yeah, it's really important to cook for your kids.
Super important.

Speaker 2 No one's eating their food. It's all the plates are coming back with like three bites taken out of them.
And then Anna has something to say.

Speaker 2 She goes, I had a guy one time I went on a date with, and I like, I wore like a hot couture dress. Yeah.
And I was going to an upper east side place where I lived.

Speaker 2 And he told me, oh, it's not like you're going to a runway show. So I said, you know what? Get out of here.
Life is my runway show. And if you don't like that, you should leave.

Speaker 1 I was like,

Speaker 2 you're making this up as you're saying it.

Speaker 2 Like, I can literally hear, like, I, as someone who sits here and does this every single day and makes up half the shit coming out of my mouth, I know you are fabricating this entire story.

Speaker 2 And you literally every part of it.

Speaker 1 You did not live on the Upper East Side.

Speaker 1 you did not have a go-to address you did not have a guy that told you that and shut up and everybody's looking at her like gross you're a gross person and they goes

Speaker 1 possibly the antichrist all right

Speaker 1 she

Speaker 1 also thinks no one she goes she goes anna belongs with no one but putin

Speaker 2 you're gonna make that other chef mad no putin is mine

Speaker 1 this

Speaker 2 she loved putin she literally said it on the show. But what's so funny is that this chick's her

Speaker 2 story has such a strange arc to it, even if it happened for real. Like if she wore a nice dress and the guy said, You look like you're going to a runway show, and she gets mad at him.

Speaker 2 She goes, Life is my runway show. If you don't like that, you should leave.
It's like, I think he just complimented you.

Speaker 1 Why would you sass off to him and be like, get out of here? Life is my runway show.

Speaker 2 Like, her story makes no sense.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So then the opera singer gets to take center stage. They're all very excited to hear opera singing and she comes out and she's like

Speaker 1 make America great make America great again

Speaker 1 They're like oh my god, that was beautiful beautiful

Speaker 2 And now something by kid rock

Speaker 2 Okay,

Speaker 1 and now a little carry underwood for you And I took my keys into his truck and I got it back.

Speaker 1 Chosen charge of my days and my nights. Tribute to Spapma, one of my

Speaker 1 one of my friends.

Speaker 1 Chosen charge of my dreams and my lights.

Speaker 1 I want

Speaker 1 I want

Speaker 1 Joe in charge of me.

Speaker 1 See what I did there?

Speaker 2 And I did a key change on it without even asking.

Speaker 1 Like a pitch change. All right, guys.
Well, tomorrow we've got a variety of activities. I'll have some ideas of who goes where by the time breakfast comes out, Amy, all right?

Speaker 1 And she's like, Yeah, okay. Well, I want you to think about that tonight, and then we'll throw some women overboard when you're ready, Joe, okay?

Speaker 1 Um, every day is going to get clearer and clearer. So now the girls are talking about him and Alicia, I think, is saying that she has a vibe.
She's like, actually, I kind of like him.

Speaker 1 And then Anna is outside. And she's like, Max, you take my picture.
So he does. And she's like, I don't even like this battle.
He's not even hot. What am I here for? This is bullshit.

Speaker 1 He didn't even criticize my dress and tell me to dress down. I mean, what kind of man is that?

Speaker 2 But you, I'm liking this. You're the best.
Because I'm like, I'm into like the bourgeois.

Speaker 2 So not like that not him no like yeah you really sound like you're into the bourgeois taking photos of caviar and bragging about san trope and wearing couture to the upper east side you definitely are like if anyone if anyone sounded like they were a big boosh bourgeois booster it was you anna yeah oh she's like i like poor people let's let's do it right now So then, um, Kizzy's wanting to get drunk and Joe's like, oh, so do I, man.

Speaker 1 She's like, yeah, I want the next night out. She's like, yeah, I'm the same.
Yeah, because now I'm single.

Speaker 1 Don't choke. Don't choke.
He's like, you're single. You're single now.
Wow, congratulations. What do you think about that, boys? Max is like, oh, single.

Speaker 1 Josh is like, yes.

Speaker 1 And Deck and Joe's like, oh, a door that I didn't believe in just opened. I'm getting all nervous now, man.
I don't know how to go and all go down. Goodbye, V.
Goodbye. Would why? Would vie be

Speaker 2 literally is not even on this episode. There's so much talk about V, but like she just says literally nothing.
So Kizzy's like, she's single now and she's ready to call some fucking drama.

Speaker 2 So everyone goes to bed. Max is

Speaker 2 like air boxing for some reason. I don't know why people do that.
And now it's the morning.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 Guys, it's going to be time to pick up the anchor.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 Joe, Daikan Joe, is talking to Nathan.

Speaker 1 He's like, Kizzy, she's single, man.

Speaker 2 And he's like, oh, Jesus Christ. Are you going to try?

Speaker 1 I'll go with the floor are you gonna try he's like I don't know I'll see what happens oh exactly I'll see what happens I don't want anything serious I don't want to date anyone I'm a new man oh god women are trouble what am I gonna do

Speaker 1 so now we go to Amy and Bachelor Joe uh having um a talk so Amy is like we need to decipher who's going to do these activities and he's like Ah, Leisha and Marley, Merrily, I guess.

Speaker 1 She's like, perfect. Is there anyone that you think isn't for you? And he's like, yeah, Brooke and Lee are someone I'm not going to pursue anything with.

Speaker 1 i mean there's just not anything there that's where i'm at so get rid of them and she's like okay i'm gonna go ahead and say bye to them and get them off the boat you just stay here so you don't ever have to look at their ugly faces again he's like thank you

Speaker 1 like what a gross pig you don't even go say like you guys thanks so much for coming on

Speaker 2 you know i don't i'm not really feeling a connection he just has the lady go do it oh gross yeah that was

Speaker 2 It's given definitely some like Ghislaine vibes. So then Kathy is right.

Speaker 1 I mean, we're all, I mean, obviously these are Ghelane.

Speaker 2 I don't know how to say her name. I mean, I don't think that these are, obviously they're not like underage.

Speaker 2 It's not, I don't think it's truly trafficking, but there's sort of this element of like, here's this lady that does this stuff for me and then I don't interface. It's just like weird.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, here's these, these hires, and they're only here to please you. And they're just not human beings, you know, like it's just gross.
The whole thing is he talks about.

Speaker 2 He wants someone with confidence and yet he's not like self-possessed enough just to say like, hey, thanks for coming. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't really feel the connection, but like, you know, it's great meeting you and have a great time in Barcelona. Yeah.
So Kathy is,

Speaker 2 there's like a moment

Speaker 2 at one point, like Kathy walks into the galley and Max's like, oh, did you change your perfume, new perfume today? And Kathy is telling Kizzy, you know what? Max is growing on me.

Speaker 2 Not that he wasn't, but like he just keeps on complimenting me when I, even when I change perfume, he even understood that I changed perfume. Isn't that crazy?

Speaker 2 I mean, what happened to the good old days of woman as passive recipient? What happened to being courted?

Speaker 2 What happened to sitting back under a parasol and granting someone a chance to try to win us over? Am I right? Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, acknowledge

Speaker 1 Max because he notices her perfume and stuff, which I guess is fair.

Speaker 2 That's actually pretty impressive, I think.

Speaker 2 Like, noticing a perfume from one day to the next?

Speaker 1 I mean, I guess.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so he's paying attention, I guess, but he's the only one giving her attention. So she's like, I guess that's him then.
Okay, he's giving me attention. So then Amy calls Leah downstairs.

Speaker 1 Okay, so now she has to dump these girls.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 Nathan's like, oh, Dakan Joel's got himself in trouble again. And they're like, what's going on? Oh, he loves trouble.
And wait until you see them with the drink in him.

Speaker 1 And H is like, I know, but V is like quite keen on him now. And he's going to ruin it, you know? And I know he wants fun, but he needs to do that without bothering people up too much.

Speaker 1 Just make sure, you know,

Speaker 1 then they think he's keen. You understand?

Speaker 2 And Max is like, yeah. So, and it's like, Joel just wants a bit of fun.

Speaker 1 So Asia's like, I know, but he needs to do that. Yes, he can't do that because they're keen.

Speaker 2 So now we go to Amy talking about Keen. Amy is talking to Leah, who just sang her heart out last night and goes, I wanted to personally tell you that Joe did not want to personally tell you.

Speaker 2 that he didn't connect as much with you. So don't take it personally, even though I am personally telling you.
He said it did have to do with your personality but

Speaker 2 don't take it personally

Speaker 2 yeah that's fine i didn't feel it either i mean he he's not for me he's he's he really isn't he he he's not i i i wasn't i wasn't i totally wasn't into him whatsoever yeah i mean uh last time i checked i mean his hair color was sort of close but i mean you got to add about like another 100 pounds and get a little bit of a faked hand before you get my get me all excited know what i'm saying

Speaker 1 You know what I'm really looking for? A man to grab me by the blue. Okay, you can leave now.

Speaker 2 Before I leave, could you just ask him if you can put on a red shiny tie that hangs down to the tip of his dick? I just want to see how it looks.

Speaker 1 So now she dumps Brooke next. And Brooke's like,

Speaker 1 what do you mean? I mean, is this like discrimination against gluten-free people? Because it's not the first time. Well, I'm sorry I'm not into hot dog buns.
Okay, you prick. Okay.

Speaker 1 Have fun eating your gluten-y.

Speaker 2 So Amy tells Asha, she goes, guess who he picked?

Speaker 1 And Asha goes, who he picked to leave?

Speaker 2 She goes, Brooke and Leah, what?

Speaker 1 Not Anna.

Speaker 1 I did not see that coming. The Antichrist is still here.

Speaker 1 And then we cut to Anna going, oh, I need to do some bikini content.

Speaker 2 Sure, just don't share it because we don't need to see it. So now Max is in the galley.
And he's like, oh, Anna, she was seeing the so disgusting things and she's not even leaving.

Speaker 2 Josh is like, oh, for fuck's sake, but at least the gluten-free is off the boat, hey? Because I'm gluten-free. He's just like a category of person.

Speaker 1 So then is where we get Anna telling the girls her story. Amy's like, what's the most spontaneous thing you've ever done?

Speaker 1 She goes, oh, well, I, the same day, decided I was going to Cannes with a person I didn't know. So I went on the carpet, click, click, click, click.
The next day, flew out.

Speaker 1 I'm like, oh, wow.

Speaker 1 Like probably most people do when they go to Cannes for a job. They just show up.
They do the red carpet and they leave. You're a poser, lady.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that sounds like a totally real story. So

Speaker 2 Alicia is in the van.

Speaker 2 Basically, we have Bachelor Joe is with Marilee and Alicia, but then Joe, Deccan Joe, is with Kidsy in the back scene. They're all going on their activity.

Speaker 2 And so like Bachelor Joe is talking to girls about something and they wind up in a mosaic class.

Speaker 2 And Joe, he basically is flirting with her, and he's like, hey, Alicia, would you, you have to put one of your pieces into my mosaic?

Speaker 1 And she's like,

Speaker 2 she kisses it and puts it in his mosaic. Like, oh, real smooth there, Joe.

Speaker 1 H-per-V.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And Kizzy's getting a little flirt to, a little flirt on, you know, he's like, oh, put a piece of mosaic in my project because it'll be a memory. She's like, oh.

Speaker 1 So then Bachelor and Alicia seem to be hitting it off. And Kizzy kisses a piece and puts it in Joe's mosaic.
You guys, what a day. What a day.
Am I right?

Speaker 1 So now Captain Sandy is asking Amy for some tea. And she's like, well, I think Leah was shocked, but it's just Joe's charter.
And Captain's like, I love this.

Speaker 1 I wish we could do every charter like this. Okay.
Are you kidding me? This is amazing. Has anybody called him BB?

Speaker 1 Okay, God, God, I've got something special. I've got something special.

Speaker 2 It is really funny how the entire crew is like so into it. And it's like, It's not like into it, like they have to pretend to do an Olympic, you know, obstacle course or something like that.

Speaker 2 They are all gossiping, like, oh my God, they got rid of, they got rid of Leah.

Speaker 1 Can you believe they got rid of Leah?

Speaker 2 I mean, she's the opera singer.

Speaker 2 Like her above Anna. I can't believe she went before Anna.

Speaker 2 They're all so invested, especially Sandy. Oh, Sandy wants to intervene so badly, but she can't.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 So now we go back to the boat and

Speaker 1 Kizzy had a fun time. And

Speaker 1 then we go to Dekhan Joe and Nathan talking.

Speaker 1 And Nathan's asking about the vibes with Kizzy and he says it was fun and he's like but but you're in a wee bit deep with V isn't it and he's like oh very very deep women's always been my problem that's always been my problem bro and Aisha hears them so she comes right over and she's like what are you guys

Speaker 1 doing

Speaker 2 He's like, well, we're having women chats. And real quickly, when they were driving back to the boat, Dekan Joe said to Kizzy, I speak to you like one of the boys.

Speaker 2 And she's like, oh, yeah, that's because I'm not looking for anything proper. And how many times do we see this trap? It's always this girl who says, I'm basically just like a guy.

Speaker 2 Like, I don't even like put my feelings into it. To me, it's just sex.
I like don't even care. Cut to like three episodes later, like knocking on the door.
Are you there? Can I come cuddle?

Speaker 2 Can I come cuddle?

Speaker 1 Can I come cuddle? Yeah, she's like, I am not like fill in the blank. The other girls.
That's right. I'm not like the other girls.
Nice to meet you. I don't want anything proper.

Speaker 1 Why can't we just fuck around and have fun? And he gives her a high five.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sorry, I skipped that. I don't know how.

Speaker 2 No, it's fine.

Speaker 1 I'm just five hours into this recap. I'm not sure.

Speaker 2 It's so predictable.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about it. Let's talk more about Richard Mulligan.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 Isha is like, listen, I've got no problem with you shagging the town black and blue. I mean, that's fine as long as you, you know, everyone that you do that with is aware of what you're doing.

Speaker 1 And he's like, I've been here before, haven't I? I'm just so handsome. It's a constant loop of torture.

Speaker 1 Yes, well, maybe you need to take some time to reflect because who's the common denominator?

Speaker 2 Ah, Captain Sandy.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Nathan. No.

Speaker 2 The starfish out there in the ocean.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Think again. It starts with J.

Speaker 1 Janice Joplin.

Speaker 1 Literally, Janice Joplin is the common denominator. I'm glad we had this talk.
All right, now, mama said a piece. Keep your hand off the goods.

Speaker 1 And that brings us to the end of Below Dick Mediterranean. Well, thanks for being here, everybody.
We'll see some of you this weekend at BravoCon. Don't forget 10 p.m.
at Beer Park in Las Vegas.

Speaker 1 The Paris Hotel is our Krappens partai tie. So come ready to do it.
And we will also be moderating the NextGen NYC panel at BravoCon Sunday at 4 p.m. So join us for that.

Speaker 1 And come back later this week for the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Trailer Trash on Patreon. We love you guys.

Speaker 1 Bye.

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Rose. There's a chance of meatballs.
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Speaker 4 Picture this. You're standing on the beach when you notice something strange.
The horizon doesn't look right. At first, all you can see is a thin white line stretching as far as your eyes can see.

Speaker 4 Then, the line starts to rise. But it's not the horizon at all.
It's a wave, a 30-foot wall of water, and it's racing straight toward you.

Speaker 4 On the day after Christmas in 2004, a 9.1 magnitude earthquake hit off the coast of Indonesia, triggering a devastating tsunami. It struck Thailand without warning.

Speaker 4 No alarms, no cell phone alerts, no evacuation.

Speaker 4 In this season of Against the Odds, experience one of the deadliest natural disasters in history through the perspectives of those who did everything everything they could to survive.

Speaker 4 Follow Against the Odds on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Against the Odds Tsunami in Thailand early and ad-free right now on Wondery Plus.