Hollywood is Full of Knuckleheads! | Your Mom's House Ep. 813

Get ready, Tucson, Arizona.

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Well, welcome.

Welcome to your mom's house.

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And welcome to another episode of Your Mom's House.

She's Christy.

I'm Tim.

And we're here to talk about some important things going on in the world.

You look lovely today.

You like it?

Yeah.

I mean, your outfit is really, really beautiful.

You notice.

Yeah, of course.

It's great.

What kind of shirt is that?

It's just a burgundy kind of thing going on.

But yeah, it's really nice.

Do you notice anything else?

Your hair looks beautiful.

Thank you.

Lipstick, you have your

perfect red.

Perfect red.

Perfect red, always on.

Yeah.

What else?

You have earrings?

Yeah.

Earrings?

Thank you.

You know, you you never notice my looks.

I always notice.

What are you talking about?

You look great.

You look really great.

There is something.

Your teeth.

Yes.

I got new veneers.

They look fantastic.

Thank you.

I saw this ad on TikTok for

Snap on Smile.

And I thought I should get these for me, for you, for the whole team.

For the whole team, yeah.

So this is something that people are using.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

It's so easy.

So, many idiots are out there paying thousands and thousands of dollars to get veneers when you can.

How much were these?

These were $9.99, Tom.

$9.99.

I got cheaper.

Do you want to try?

I have not even thought of that yet.

Thank you.

Is this?

I don't know which way

it doesn't even matter.

Just put them in and you

so natural.

It's so, so good.

Does it feel nice?

It feels really nice.

Yeah.

And it makes me want to smile.

Yeah.

Do you trust me?

You're so white.

You're so white.

You're so white.

I know.

It's comfortable.

Yeah.

I look comfortable.

And you don't have to worry about staining your teeth with coffee.

No, that's right.

The one thing is you don't want to eat with the men

or drink or do too much.

Oh, you drank with them.

I did.

And you probably

don't want to talk too much with them in there.

Not too much.

But you look so pretty.

You don't have to talk anyways.

You look just like someone else.

I just put in the top ones.

I haven't even tried putting in the bottom one.

Staff on smile.

Here you go.

You look like one of those old guys.

Yeah.

A good brand new white, white, white teeth.

The old guy who's still at the

club.

He's like, hey, ladies.

How do my teeth look though you look great really yeah should i get on this water i'm gonna choke i think

well these are fantastic

and then there's uh 9.99 i guess this is like the glue part you kind of melt these so you melt those down in water and then you glue these to your actual teeth fantastic i imagine it will do no harm to my existing veneers probably yeah the packaging looks like it's from 1974 which is cool so good yeah i just love this i mean at first photo is the lowest res photo I've ever seen on something.

It's so shitty.

It's unbelievable.

One size fits all.

Believe it or not.

Wow.

You could get these on Amazon.

You know what's fun too?

Big smile confidence.

Yeah.

Instantly.

They don't know.

I sure felt it.

They're a differentiate between like women's teeth or men's teeth.

Oh, it's all just teeth.

It's one size fits all.

The snap-on smile.

Fantastic.

That is really cool.

That's awful.

Well, that did feel good.

There's so much to get into.

Why don't we just start with this opening clip?

It's really, really, really...

Well, my favorite.

It's my girl.

Yeah, here we go.

I want you to have a good time.

Like, I don't want it to seem

like, I don't know, intimidating.

If you don't want the camera shooting based up, just tell people, like, this is for you.

Do you know what I mean?

Like, I know, obviously, I have to film it to how I overmorn it, but I want you to have a good time.

And if there's anything you want to try, like, I want it to be fun.

Like, because everyone I meet in Slack was always so nice.

Like, I don't want it to be a...

Do you know what I just want you to have a good time, basically?

But yeah, you're welcome.

Just spit on me, slap me, make me yours today.

Because Because that's who I am.

If you get nervous and whatever else, like please don't

worry, it's fine.

I was easy.

Cool.

Holy crap.

It's a great sport.

Welcome to your mom's house.

With Tom Segura.

Tom Simon.

Christina Pazitski.

Welcome to your mom's house.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Incredible pre-game speech.

You know, there's coaches that stay in the locker room, try to get their motivated.

Yeah, and you, there's different versions of it, you know.

This shit is big time.

That's one coach.

Yeah.

You know, and then another coach will say something like, Sound me, slap me, make me olds today.

Yeah, that is so cool.

I was thinking of like the Braveheart speech.

Yeah.

Like, she's really motivating these guys.

Like, you can come on me, you can slap me.

She's like, this is for you.

This is for you.

If you're nervous or whatever, you know.

But then she goes, although this is how I make my money.

Yeah.

Like, I have to be here.

Do you believe in God?

No, I believe in cum.

What?

Come.

She's right about it.

Come.

Yeah.

Yeah, dummy.

What the fuck is that?

They think that's not what it's come.

That's the only thing I worship.

She's really cool, man.

Bonnie Blue.

But I mean, to get, there's a room of guys in ski masks.

Yeah.

And she's just like, don't fucking hold back.

Treat me like whatever you want to treat me like.

This is for you.

It's for them.

And you can see all the guys' eyes are darting around and shit.

They're all kind of weirded out, you know.

But what?

It seems perfectly natural and cool.

It is cool.

Don't you want to go to a room full of strangers and come all over this chick and wear your ski mask to do it?

Yeah, the, I don't know.

That whole, I think the

turnoff for me, if I may say, might be the 70 other guys.

No,

yeah, but other than that, that's cool.

I think it's a fucking awesome thing.

Salmi, Smack Me, Make Me Ows today.

Mike Meols today.

Mike Mayols today.

I know.

I love Bluey, that show so much.

This is a little different.

She does her accent.

She's great.

You know, I want to dislike Bonnie Blue, but.

She's 26.

I know.

It's practically dead.

Jesus.

She's so old.

Bonnie Blue's social media account disappears after a 2,000 men sex stunt.

What happened there?

The main TikTok and Instagram accounts of porn and OnlyFans star Bonnie Blue appeared to have been removed a day after she announced plans to sleep with 2,000 men in a single day.

The 26-year-old whose real name is Tia Billinger made headlines earlier this year after claiming she had sex with 1,057 men in 12 hours.

Now she says she intends to break her own record.

Well, that's what all great athletes do.

For sure.

You just raise the bar.

Push yourself.

You push it.

But I have to say, brilliant marketing move.

I mean, it's not a bad idea.

No, I mean, everybody has learned this woman's name.

I know.

It's brilliant.

But here's the deal, man, is that I heard that there was a lot of stuff on TikTok about how those guys didn't all come.

Because if you have to, hold on, you got to do the math.

You know, 24 hours, 2,000 guys.

What's the math on how much time each guy gets?

I think I saw something where they get like a minute or, you know.

So that's really hard to come in front of seven, or sorry, 1,999 other strangers.

It can be.

There's certain guys, like some guys can get it done, like the real gamers.

The real workers can get it done.

Worker.

Yeah.

But could you do it in a minute with a camera?

Well, that's the thing is.

I think the pressure makes it more difficult, right?

Of course.

Like if you're alone, you could be like, okay.

Of course.

But yeah, with the and also she didn't say I'm making 2,000 guys come.

I'm just having sex with.

She's having sex with.

So that could be her legal loophole, if you will.

I don't know.

Really interesting.

It is really all interesting notes.

2,000.

Wait, what's the, so it's a minute per guy?

Something like that.

So what's 2,000 minutes?

I could do 3,000.

Wow.

I could do 10,000.

Are you

signing up for this?

Can I tell you where she went wrong?

Yeah.

What did she have guys in?

One in the mouth, one in the mouth.

I don't know.

I don't know.

We need to.

I think the only way to know is to buy the video that she has posted somewhere.

Can one of you guys do the research for us?

She needs to get more.

Because how's she going to, you have to constantly push the boundaries.

What's the next one going to be?

What is the next one going to be?

Yeah.

Well,

she's obviously upping the annie, right?

This is way to go.

Keep going.

I hope you get to 10,000 in that day.

I'm proud of her.

It's fucking awesome.

Proud of myself.

Yeah.

I'm proud of you, and we would love to, you know, see where this goes.

So cool.

A quick reminder,

we started producing the NADC podcast on YouTube.

It's hosted by the world-renowned chef Philip Franklin Lee and the pro amazing skateboarder, Neen Williams.

These two guys are incredible.

They started, of course, an AD, Not a Damn Chance, Burger.

And they're friends of ours.

They're fantastic.

It's a whole new concept where they're talking to people about business, about life, about overcoming obstacles.

Their first episode was with Jelly Roll.

And they've, yeah, they're just great, man.

So it looks like Jamie Oliver has one on there.

I did one.

I know there's a bunch coming out, but they're really great guys, and it's a really great podcast if you like that type of conversation.

So huge shout-out to them.

It's a great transition for us to tell you that

we actually had something done here about a week ago, and it should be out pretty soon, where

we know Philip.

We know, you know, this guy's a Michelin star chef.

He has sushi by scratch.

He has a pasta bar with his lovely wife, Margarita, who's an amazing chef.

Amazing chef, too.

Amazing pastry chef.

Her desserts are ridiculous.

Her bread or pastries.

Holy shit.

They're an amazing couple and both really, really talented.

And anyway,

you know,

Philip had heard.

He's like, you know, I'm your, I thought I was like your closest chef friend.

I said, you know, you're definitely one of them.

Yeah.

But I have another chef friend you might know by the name of Fancy Chef.

And we had this conversation about, why don't you have like a cook-off, see whose skills are really up there, you know?

So

those two guys faced each other in a very intense battle that we filmed.

It's amazing.

It's amazing.

I can't wait to see it.

And we had, I was one of the judges.

Another great chef, Josh Weissman, who lives in Austin.

He's an incredible chef.

He was one of the judges.

And then Rob Eiler also came.

So

we had a very, like a just, hey guys, here's the ingredients.

Do your best.

And I don't want to give anything away, but it was quite the battle.

And that'll be out soon.

Well, what a nice panel of people.

You have a comedian, an actor, and an actual chef.

So there's, you know, it's a nice balance between

the judges.

And I'll say this: I mean, there was a lot of debate, you know, at the judges' table about

it was really something.

Well, fancy, I'm sure Rod is a game.

He always does.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, my God.

Did he ever bring it?

Yeah, very talented guy.

Yeah.

So.

Wow.

I mean, Phillips, pretty, you know, Phillips, not too bad himself.

But we'll see.

Phil's pretty good, but I mean,

when a fancy chef comes in, beautiful and nice.

It's something else.

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So, very excited for that.

Now,

speaking of the coolest guys in the world,

the coolest who's been in our world lately um

tony johns has been just going through it i mean his

if his instagram was a television show i think it'd be the highest rated reality show on tv right now i agree i agree this guy who is even up on everything i mean can you fill us in on what's actually going on so much it's such a soap opera cougar you want to take this one you've been talking to him yeah so it's it's been a very exciting couple of weeks.

So just to recap, in jail, got out of jail.

Right.

And then since getting out of jail, what's been happening?

So basically, he's been living in hotel rooms lately.

He's just getting them like a week at a time.

And he's been accosting people at the Syracuse Mall.

I think it's like called Destiny USA or something.

When you say accosting, what does that mean?

You know, looking for work.

Oh.

Working.

Working.

Pro former.

Yeah.

He's been proforming there at the mall, just looking for work.

And he's just living off of, you know, fan donations, his OnlyFan stuff, cameos, whatever he can scrounge up, really.

But he's got a real spending problem, right?

He's quite the consumer.

Yes, some people do say that he has a little bit of a spending problem.

He says that, you know, all of this could just go away at any time, so you just got to spend while you can and enjoy what you have.

That's an interesting philosophy.

That's what every accountant will tell you.

Just spend it now.

Yeah.

Business managers will be like, this could go away tomorrow.

Just spend it all today.

That's a good way to plan.

My understanding is that he gets money and then he'll spend it on like swigs.

Swigs.

Swigs and slices.

Swigs and slices.

Swigs and slices.

He likes to go to...

Is that his huge update?

It looks like within the last hour or so, his Instagram got taken down.

Could it have been the fully erect with stains in his underwear poster?

That might have been it.

Yeah.

That might have been reported.

What, Tony?

Always keeping a worker down.

You can't take a worker down.

Were you just trying to make a living?

Can we reach out to him right now?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Let's give him a call.

Okay.

He's got to be furious about this Instagram takedown.

Oh, this is going to be...

This is the time to call.

Call the five other numbers.

How many does he have?

I think Tony just has the one.

What?

He's a newer cool guy.

He's a younger one.

Oh.

Damn.

I literally just talked to him.

You just talked to him.

How long ago?

Like, less than an hour, I think.

Maybe he's on the phone to Instagram.

Oh, yeah.

He may be on.

He's calling customer service.

He might be on the phone with Zuck.

He does know him.

Yeah, for sure.

Everyone knows Tony France.

Everybody knows Tony France.

Zuck, bro.

Does he have any other outlets?

Like, is he on

live leak?

Or what?

We are the only streams.

What is it?

Live leak stream?

Well, he's probably

someone is putting stuff there, but I feel like his IG is like his relationship to the world.

His lifeline.

Yeah, I know.

I mean, this is where a lot of it goes down.

God damn it.

He's got to get on the TikTok.

You're going to take a worker down?

Instagram is so snooty about their guidelines and shit.

He needs to go to TikTok where nobody...

That's not sure they care a lot of TikTok.

Yeah.

X is the place.

X.

Yeah, he's got to go to X.

Give it to you.

He really should be on X because they don't flag shit.

They don't care.

It's pornography.

No, yeah.

People are like, I'm a Nazi.

And they're like, great, cool.

Keep posting.

Yeah, like, freedom of speech, baby.

Yeah, do it, man.

Yeah.

That's the place for him, though.

No restrictions.

This is a real garbage dump.

I mean, it was always shitty.

It was always a dumpster fire.

Porn, porn, porn.

Well, it's not just, it's just chaos.

I don't even go there.

I hate it.

I can't believe that anybody.

It's all bots, too.

It's bots and nonsense.

Yeah, I'm not interested in that.

It's such a shit fucking platform.

Well, it always was.

It always was.

But I think the problem is it was like the first iteration of something exciting where you could read stupid people's thoughts.

It's garbage.

What the fly am I reading any of this fucking stupidity?

Well, but we tried getting a hold of him.

That's not working out.

If you get a hold of him, you let us know, okay?

Yeah.

We're working on it.

Worker.

Hey, I just want to tell you something really cool happened to me.

I was shopping at the mall and I got recognized as the fart lady.

As the fart lady?

Yeah.

Some lady was like, do I know you?

Do I know you?

And I was like, no.

And then she's like, yeah, you farted.

You're the fart lady.

How did that feel?

Pretty special.

Like, I've reached a pinnacle.

Like, I'd rather be known.

I think that's the only thing I want to be known as.

Fart lady.

Fart lady.

Yeah.

You farted on that show.

She goes, I just saw a podcast where you farted.

And I was like, yeah.

That's really

right.

That's also like, I mean, you had to feel some pride.

Actually, I did.

Yeah.

I did because it was like a fancy retail store.

Yeah.

I was like.

This is, it makes sense.

The only thing would have been better if she had turned to the people there and been like, this is the fart lady.

The fart lady, everybody.

Yeah.

You don't know this chick?

That's awesome.

That was pretty cool.

She's like, you farted.

Yeah.

By the way, I see a folder here I hadn't seen.

It says King Ass Ripper update.

What?

There's an update?

Yeah, I mean, these are a lot of the same videos that are going around right now.

We think they're still mostly re-uploads.

We've been talking to him, him.

It might be an impersonator.

We're trying to get to the bottom of it.

Gotcha.

Either way, I don't think these have been played on the show before.

Oh, wow.

Next time we're just going to put all these in a funnel and just funnel it down my throat and gulp pudding all fucking day.

I have to say, Tom.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

His evolution is one of the more fascinating ones.

I like his earlier work.

I'm still, I'm on the first album, you know?

I like

the farts.

I do feel like this feeding thing, I know,

the eating

is like, I get it, because here's the other thing.

A lot of times as an artist, you go, don't just define me by my first album.

I want to do other things.

I know.

I'm not just going to play the songs you like.

I know.

I'm an artist.

I feel like that's what we're getting here, but I'm with you.

I especially like the,

in his original stuff, it would be like reaching into a cabinet in the kitchen.

Yeah.

And then he'd fart and be like, oopsie.

Yep.

Yeah.

Or walking up the stairs.

I like that.

I like that it was like, was he in his parents' house?

We don't know where he's doing, what he's doing.

He had dirty chonies on with the holes.

It was related.

Holes and brown.

His work spoke to us on a level because you also had holes in your chonis at the time.

And he reminded me of the broken.

Not as much brown.

They were very brown.

So dirty.

Yeah.

I don't know.

There was an innocence, a playfulness to his earlier work.

True.

And now I feel like he's more self-aware of the camera and what he's doing and all the eating.

He's definitely aware of the weight gain, which is dramatic.

If you watch those early videos,

he's like 160 pounds, it looks like.

He's like very lean.

And then

I don't like these eating videos.

This is in Burger King.

Imagine seeing this in Burger King.

You're walking by

with your family.

Oh, the mayonnaise, the mayonnaise.

Oh, the mayonnaise.

Ugh.

Oh, God.

There's definitely families in this restaurant.

Of course.

He's ruining people's day.

That's awesome.

Oh,

yeah, but he's looking around.

I know.

But there's also a mom right now out of frame going like this, just grabbing her kids.

Like, let's go.

Let's go.

I don't want to.

Let's go.

Don't look at him.

Don't look at that man.

Let's go.

He still has the hole in his shirt, which I love.

He stays true to brand.

Yeah.

That's really.

Filthy shirt.

Oh, yeah.

like here look how look at him i know he was so cute look at him beefing on the dog's face yeah

it's like a playfulness yeah

the dog is so used to it too

yeah sniff that one

yeah it's really something else now it's a whole other thing yeah but you know

we still honor you we still celebrate you we still cherish you in your work you're still an amazing guy yeah there's there's a little bit too much of a wink at the camera now for me, for my liking.

Do you know what happened to me, by the way?

Go ahead.

Last week.

I was on the road and I'd get back to my room.

And sometimes, you know, certain, you just go, I want to hear this music right now, right?

Like something you have.

And I got on this like Michael Jackson kick.

Yeah, he's timeless.

He's timeless.

And I pulled out greatest hits, and I was just going through all of them.

And I was like, Jesus Christ.

What's your favorite album?

Well, it wasn't even about it, it was just that there's just so many great songs.

It was like from Jackson 5 stuff just through

the end.

And then I remembered that one of my all-time, like it just hit me.

Like, I'm listening to this music in my hotel room.

Yeah.

Just like

earbuds in, you know, maybe an edible.

And I'm just enjoying life.

Yeah.

Just, that's how I'm winding down.

And then it hits me that I was like, oh man, it just popped into my memory.

One of my all-time favorite clips from this show.

I know.

People fighting in

So we hear about it as Michael Jackson.

This is like in the weeks after he died.

And let's knock out the psychobabble.

This guy was a pervert.

He was a child.

He was.

And to be giving this much coverage to him day in and day out, what does it say about us as our country?

I just think it's too, you know, we're too politically correct.

No one wants to stand up and say, we don't need Michael Jackson.

You know, he died.

He had some talent.

Define.

That's why he's dying every day.

There's men and women dying today in Afghanistan.

Let's give them the credit they deserve.

So I really think the media has disgraced itself.

I think that too many people in public life have made fools of themselves by talking about Michael Jackson as if he's some kind of hero.

There's nothing good about this guy.

He may have been a good singer, did some dancing.

But the bottom line is, would you let your child or grandchild be in the same room with Michael Jackson?

What are we glorifying for us?

This is that's Representative Peter King with my all-time favorite quote.

May have been a good singer, did some dancing, did some dancing.

Michael Jackson may have a good, may have been a good singer, did some dancing.

He invented the moonwalk, sir.

Fine.

Fine.

Uther.

Did some dancing.

Yeah.

Guys, a pervert, okay?

But how he had such good albums, like so many bangers.

Which,

by the way, just this is what you're saying

is the reality of how the world works.

Yeah, of course.

You can be as awful as awful can be.

And if you're super talented, most of the time.

It's okay.

Most of the time.

It's okay.

Most of the time.

You can do.

Yeah.

Well, I mean, yeah.

How talented are you, though?

I know.

If you're otherworldly talented, you can get away with a lot of awful shit.

MJ, for sure.

So MJ, I think there was a level of denial with MJ.

Nobody wanted to believe that he was doing this stuff.

And there's a lot of people.

Well, it was like, it was like millions of people on either side, right?

Yeah.

And the fan, like the hardcore fans would break down and defend.

And even to this day, there's been documentaries of like people who go, I was abused by him.

And people go, that person's a liar.

Yeah.

Like, yeah.

It's crazy, but you're right.

There is a part of your brain that's like, I still want to listen to his jams because they're so good.

Yeah.

And I can totally separate the pedo from the music.

It just happens with, I mean, I know.

Look, man, I'll tell you this.

He's not on the same level, but I also got on some R.

Kelly shit.

And I got to tell you, the guy's fucking unbelievable.

He is unbelievable.

What do you, see, because I only know they're ridiculous that I'm coming out of closet.

And he's like, and he, oh, wait, what's that one when he's like, girl, get your passport?

He's strapped in the closet.

Yeah.

Strapped in the closet.

He went through, like, he was.

What's all that?

He wasn't.

He was bananas.

He's fucking crazy.

But he is an unbelievable producer,

incredible singer and

piano player.

Okay, what's his big jam?

His biggest jams?

Yeah, like, tell me what I'm saying.

I mean, I believe I can fly.

It's probably his biggest.

Yeah, that's probably his biggest jam.

That's a big thing.

But, like, you know, step in the name of love.

Step in the name of love.

Yeah.

I know that jam.

That's when he's on a boat dancing.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that's a good one.

Pod pipe, y'all.

He's just doing his

shit.

He's insane.

But, like, you, as a, you know, he also produced a lot of big, big hits for people.

Um, just super talented.

And I know got away with Phil Spector, another creep, creep guy that

was great, made the wall of sound

amazing Christmas music that I love every year.

And then it's also, by the way, and with people, like, R.

Kelly's probably one of the ones who you don't, there's not a lot of people going, hey man, that's bullshit.

He's a good guy.

No one's really doing that.

Nobody's defending him.

No, no, no.

Like people are like, he had people essentially kidnapped in a home, brainwashed.

Like they just don't make excuses for him.

Right.

But like for other people, like MJ, they make Woody Allen.

Oh, Woody Allen's a.

He married his stepdaughter.

I mean, adopted daughter.

Yeah.

And then his biological kids.

He's a creep.

Oh, yeah.

They say.

They're like, this is my dad.

And I'm talking about him.

Yeah.

And then he's just like, that's not true.

And people go, yeah, he makes great movies.

He makes great movies.

Well, even Hugh Hefner, you know, when he died, I was like, why are we celebrating this Cretan?

This guy just.

was a pornographer and a scumbag and everybody was like, no, he liberated women's bodies.

And I'm like, maybe, I don't know.

But now that Holly Madison's coming out, you know, she's autistic as fuck, which is really funny.

And she just says whatever is in her heart.

And she's like, yeah, dude, he would make us do all kinds of demeaning, awful, creeper things.

And you're like, yeah, no, no.

The guy that owns the Playboy mansion.

And the duh.

But what's interesting about what you said is like, R.

Kelly was,

his thing was like 15-year-olds, right?

Like that teenage.

So, yeah, it's, and I forget the term for that because it's not pet.

Right.

It's like a special term.

But he likes them when you're in the infancy of sexual development.

But once they become women, he's like, no.

No, thank you.

I like them like, yeah, like 14, 15.

No, thanks.

But why don't we believe so then the people that came out against MJ?

People were like, we don't want to defend children.

Oh, there you go.

What is that?

Defenders.

Ephebophilia.

Okay, I don't, it's so funny.

I know, I'm just looking for the term, ephabophilia.

The mid to late adolescence.

That's what he's into, yes.

Yeah.

And he also likes to make pee-pee on them.

You have to make a pee-pee and you're right here.

Got it.

And there's also a thing with like,

weren't they like all banging Aaliyah too?

Or didn't Aaliyah get emancipated at like 15?

He married her or whatever dated her when she was incredibly young these musicians are such creepers well you get like you get into your own

world like you get worshipped so much and you get you start getting away with little things and it just kind of I know Jerry Lee Lewis married his 13 year old cousin so R.

Kelly was illegally married

R.

Kelly was illegally married to Aaliyah when she was 15.

Yeah, Jerry Lee Lewis, by the way, 13.

13.

Wasn't Elvis?

South.

Priscilla Presley was about that age, too.

13.

And we're all like.

Parents gave her permission to.

And the funny thing is, when people bring that up, oh, the biggest piece of shit, the fucking absolute biggest piece of shit.

Which one?

Roman Polanski.

Yeah, that guy.

He fucked this girl in a goddamn.

Yeah, she was 14 years old when they met.

Okay.

But Polanski fucked a 13-year-old in a hot tub.

Yeah.

And then fled the country when France.

Yeah, and France was like,

Men have feelings.

And so many people in Hollywood were like,

what's the fucking.

And apparently now, you know, she's forgiven him, and you're like, okay.

I mean, it's a 13-year-old.

The thing is, I forget who once said this, and it's never left my mind.

Is that like, if this were Roman Polanski, the deli owner, no one would be like, dude,

get over it.

Fucking guy's great.

Like, it's just because he's a great director.

I know.

It's just like when Bill Cosby went down, you know, people closest to Bill were defending him, like his co-stars and stuff.

Yeah, yeah.

I know, and I think there's just a level of disbelief with that.

Like, if somebody were to tell me your husband is doing this, I'd be like, no way.

I know this guy, no way.

But so many people didn't want to believe that Bill Cosby was a piece of shit and still drugging people.

I mean, drugging people.

And there's people who are defending P.

Diddy right now.

May have been a good singer.

Did some dancing?

I did some dancing.

Yeah.

But MJ was other level talent.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

He has the craziest allegations.

Yeah.

And it's also met with the craziest level of talent.

Yeah.

I wonder if it goes hand in hand.

I don't know.

Yeah.

I mean, I tell you, my favorite, I love Thriller.

That's a banger album.

Quincy Jones.

Off the walls, like one of the greatest.

But then once he started taping his fingertips, I was out.

Once that weird shit happened.

I have a skin condition.

I always lying about all that stuff.

Until my skin's turning white.

And I've had

one procedure on my nose.

One procedure.

No, it's not true.

It's not true.

Blanket.

Blanket.

And bubbles we do.

We sit on the couch and we hug.

What was with the taping?

The tape came out on the fingers and bad when he was like, I'm a, I'm a bad, I'm bad.

You're like, what is that?

You know the bad Prince story?

Yeah, he wouldn't do it.

So

Michael Jackson first reached out when they were doing bad.

They reached out to Prince to do it like a duo.

A duet.

Yeah.

And

Prince was like, all right, let's see it.

And then Michael Jackson was like,

you're the first verse.

Yeah.

And he was like, I'm not going to say, your bud is mine.

I'm not doing that shit.

And he was like, well, that's it.

And And they're like, He was like, No, I'm not fucking doing that.

You know what?

Prince, I loved him when he was alive.

In his death, he has now become the baddest motherfucker.

Like, all these things are coming out, like, stories about Prince.

So, allegedly, did you guys hear this?

That there was a recording of Prince that was played during the P.

Diddy trial, where I don't even know, it's probably not true, but that he made a recording, like naming names and dates and stuff.

And

yeah, okay, so they didn't play.

You can't believe anything now i know look at this look at that ai face so ridiculous

but anyway he tried having babies with this one chick this young girl you know he was always into these young girls they all looked like vanity it was one apollonia vanity

and they couldn't have kids they had a baby that died he burned down the baby's nursery burned it to the ground and then dumped that chick and was like on to the next one can't give me babies and stuff and i was like this guy's a legend Unbelievable talent.

Unbelievable talent.

Unbelievable.

Prince?

Unbelievable talent.

I don't know who I like better, MJ or Prince.

And this is not to say that, like, we're not all, everyone's flawed.

Everybody has flawed.

Yeah, but we don't fuck minors and stuff.

That's what I'm saying.

That's like what.

Yeah.

That's what

kids do.

That's what cartel guys do.

You know what I mean?

Like, it's really.

And what's wrong with y'all?

Yeah.

What's wrong with y'all?

I guess they just, when you get that famous and you have access to everything, the theory is they're like, well, what's next?

You know, I'm bored.

They get bored.

I think, oh, man.

You definitely get weird.

We got that part.

Everybody gets weird when you get money because now the sky is the limit.

You can do what you want.

But this level of

other level.

But it's also who you're surrounding yourself with, okay?

Yeah.

Yeah.

What about bubbles?

So.

I got a monkey and I got a playground.

Oh, my God.

Remember that?

And they're like, there's no way this guy's a people.

He has a roller coaster in his backyard.

Yeah.

Fucking zebras walking around.

So fucking weird.

You don't like animals?

Could you imagine being the parent, though, that's like, yeah, go spend the night there?

Which just shows you like our obsession with like fame and celebrity.

People are that taken by it where they're like, yeah, you spend the night there.

That's fine.

It's Michael Jackson.

And then he took fucking Emmanuel Lewis as his date to the Grammys.

He's famous.

Remember that, babe?

Yeah, yeah.

He fucking took Emmanuel Lewis as his date to the Grammys.

And people were like, he's fine.

He's normal.

He's normal.

He's taking a kid to the Grammys.

Michael's very childlike himself.

That was the that was the thing.

Yeah, yeah.

He's just very childlike himself.

Like,

okay.

Well, what could be more?

He would say, this is what he said in Bashir.

He goes, what could be more special than sharing your bed?

Sharing your bed with a child?

What could be more beautiful than sharing your bed?

That's what he would say.

It's not, it's no, it's not, it's no, no, it's more beautiful.

What could be more beautiful than sharing your bed?

And America was like, uh-huh.

Yeah, good point.

What could be more?

That Bushier interview should have put him right in jail.

I mean, the shit that he was.

It's like you watch that and then you listen until you want to be starting something.

You're like, yeah, fucking, I get it.

It's beautiful.

And the lies, I only had one nose job.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

There we go.

All the kids.

See, that's what happened.

That literally is like, you're too famous.

You're just too famous.

Nobody says no to you.

That's the problem.

People weep when they meet you.

Oh, my God.

Okay.

Here, let's translate.

It's fucking awful.

That's terrible.

God damn it.

So we're here with Alki and Jennifer David.

Of course, the owners of 9021Go, and

of course, Have Faith and Film On and many, many other companies.

Good to have you here.

Thank you so much.

You look beautiful, Nishka.

Well, I'm a little bit chilly, Jan.

That's okay.

Uh-oh.

I remember this.

Alki, I don't want to put my mouth on that now.

That's absolutely disgusting.

Oh my goodness.

Um,

Jennifer, I'm not often speechless, but I think I've actually been caught speechless.

I love it.

It looks like they all have the snap-on smile.

They do have the snap-on smile, and that's what this is a plug for.

The snap-on smile, you can get it also on Amazon for $9.99.

It's a big smile confidence instantly.

Wow.

Look at that.

Why don't you, you know what?

You got to start doing this on red carpets.

Coffee smile.

Yeah, I saw that earlier.

It's even better than the perfect smile.

Oh, yeah.

I didn't think it could get more perfect.

Types.

Great.

Yeah.

You got to start doing this on the red carpets.

Farting into mics.

I would be so happy.

Jerry recommends Hologram Billionaire Pay Model $900 million after she detailed Office's room.

Oh, shit.

We're just hitting the fucking bat of the park today.

There's some really cool guys on today.

What is going on?

Fuck.

Yeah.

He's a knucklehead, too.

he is a big knucklehead right off yeah listen i i gotta tell you it's gotta be who your friends are because you know we we have wealthy friends yeah you know what they do yeah push-ups

sit-ups kettlebells cold plunges our listen we're arguably friends with like

probably the most famous comedians in the world.

We do nothing like this.

None of us that I know of.

Well, there's no room.

There's no fucking

mothership.

No.

No.

We, you know,

what is wrong?

Can't you just be normal?

Just enjoy your money.

Be normal.

Go buy some fucking suits.

Go buy a yacht.

Buy a car, you dickhead.

Yeah, you don't have to.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

But I have a feeling this guy would have been a creep without the money.

That's the thing.

They're just creeps with money.

Well, yeah,

they were always creeps.

Yeah.

Someone who's a creep with money was always a creep.

Creep.

Yeah.

And now he's a bigger creep.

Essentially, yes.

could be more special.

How was your peachy?

It was good.

I pushed hard, it came out.

Got some

special

fun stuff to show you now.

All right, we'll get out of this absolutely horrifying segment.

We did

a half a year.

How's it going, Eddie?

Great to be back.

So upset that I wasn't here the past couple episodes.

How do you feel about white gay porn?

Does it bother you as much as a black gay porn?

This is disrespectful to firemen.

This is disrespectful to the service.

You know,

they risk their lives out there.

That's true.

But these guys are also for our entertainment.

They're risking their lives.

Yeah.

You know, I started watching Interview with a Vampire on Netflix.

You know me.

I love my vampire stuff.

I love vampire stuff.

I got to say, it's too gay.

It's gay?

I can't handle it.

Like, oh my God, dude.

They, at one point...

They do butt fuck, right?

They, like, have vampire sex or whatever.

Yeah.

They do?

Well, like, they don't butt fuck, but like, they, like, they kind of homo out.

At one point,

they share a coffin.

They're like, good night.

And, like, they share a coffin.

I was like, all right, I'm out of here.

And then there's the scene where, like, Lestat turns Louis into a vampire, which is, like, awesome in Anarchist World.

And, like, this two dudes naked.

Yeah.

They're fucking, and it just shows their, Lestat's gay ass, like, his butt naked, and the other vampire naked.

And I was like, I don't want to see this.

Really?

Because who's watching this vampire show it's women right unless you're into gay dudes but some women love that show some women do I've seen women met women that say they're like I love watching gay porn and I'm like really I think Anne Rice was into homo gay guys doing stuff and

I think the uh the explanation I've heard is that the gay men

or the you know the gay porn men are better looking than the straight porn men sure so they just go I like watching this more

seems like a lot though I don't like watching I guess it's not that the dudes together.

If you look at it, you love.

Oh, Jesus.

I know, and it's like my favorite book.

I love Interview of the Vampire.

I love the series.

This is a new one.

It's like really, it's like a few years old.

It's on

like the one we grew up with, the Brad Pitt.

Right.

Yeah, so it is based on the same book, Interview of the Vampire and the Ann Rice Chronicle, Vampire Chronicles, but it's like a remake of Interview of the Vampire.

God is.

And they didn't homo out in the movie version, like Tom Cruise.

Have you seen Sinners yet?

I don't know.

What is that?

That's the movie that came out early.

What did we see?

This movie.

Is it about vampires?

Yes.

It's so good.

No, but I'll watch it.

So good.

Really?

You like a vampire movie?

This movie was fantastic.

Yeah, I saw it on the road.

We went and saw it, and it was really, really good.

Okay.

Yeah.

You went on the road to see a cool vampire movie?

Well, I didn't know what I was seeing either.

I didn't know what the movie was.

Who tricked you to watching a gay vampire movie?

This isn't gay at all.

It's not gay.

It's really good.

Why do they have to gay at my vampires?

I don't know.

I don't want it.

I don't know.

Jesus, you sound like any.

Well, I'm so fucking mad.

I know.

I feel like.

You get it, Christina.

Right?

All right.

I get it.

It's unnecessary.

It's unnecessary.

Exactly.

Are we focusing on it?

Why are we focusing on it?

All right, okay.

And I know they're homoerotic in the book.

Jesus, Christian.

But I don't want to see them.

This is Pride Month.

Could you have a little fucking respect?

In the book, it is meant to be.

All right, who are we here with today?

Rico.

So, Rico, are you a top or a bottom?

I'm first.

Kick the shit off.

So what you gonna do for me?

I'm gonna fuck the shit out too.

Oh, bend me over then.

Do you know what I'll do to you?

Damn right.

You don't call me the Puerto Rican miss for no reason.

Hell your fucking way.

Like, nigga, just go on a grinder, dog.

You don't got to do all this bullshit, man.

That's so stupid, man.

That's so stupid.

What the fuck is verse, by the way?

Well, here you go, man.

Verse is a short for versatile.

It refers to a person who is comfortable both giving and receiving.

Can I tell you something?

Especially anal.

Very cool.

I can hear

Ennie's commentary on gay porn all day.

I know.

It's so good.

No, man.

Oh, man.

What the fuck is this shit?

It's upsetting, man.

That's how I feel about Interview with the Vampire, where they show the gayness.

Yeah, so it's like I don't want to see it.

One time you see it in a damn bit, it's like, okay.

All right, you had to do it.

All right.

Got it.

You know what I'm saying?

The representation.

All right, fine.

This is going to be the whole show, though.

I know.

It's just gay niggas.

Okay, cool.

I didn't realize I was watching gay porn.

What the fuck?

So true, Ennie.

Did you see Sinners?

Yeah, it was horrible.

You didn't like it?

I hated it.

It's the worst movie I've ever seen in my life.

You're not serious.

I'm not playing with you.

Wait,

what did you not like about it?

First of all, I mean, I got some.

First of all, I'm tired of the fucking

niggas in the fields picking cotton and shit.

I'm tired of that fucking scene.

Okay, I've seen it a thousand billion fucking times.

Do the singing again.

Fucking pick my cotton.

I'm fucking so tired of that shit, man.

It was that for an hour and a half.

And then it was shitty CGI fucking vampires and shit.

It was horrible.

Wow.

And I was so mad because I'm like, there's no way I'm the only nigga that thought this.

And so I went on Reddit and I could not find people that agree with me.

Everyone said this was the most, the best cinematic experience of my life.

What the fuck movies have you watched then?

I question your movie history.

Unbelievable, man.

If it didn't have them.

But that was the movie, though.

And then at the end, well, I mean, I guess I don't want to spoil it, but whatever.

At the end, it was the, you know, oh, fucking the black people did it again.

We won.

Motherfucker.

Like, bro, cut it out with this shit, man.

Fucking KKK.

There's no KKK anymore.

And then, oh, what do you know?

There is.

Oh, surprise.

Spoilers.

You got to start doing more movie reviews.

I fucking hated that.

I forgot to send any of the movies.

Wow.

And I'm not really like that.

I'm not a dude to hate on movies.

I don't have a lot that bad to say about a lot of movies, but I hate that.

Did you see the new Mission Impossible?

That movie.

I did not yet.

I want to see that.

You've already seen it with your boyfriend on the road.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So, this is what it is.

Yeah.

This is where this is coming from.

Who's this boyfriend?

I know.

Who's your road boyfriend?

You keep seeing movies with.

Talking about Kirk.

Is it Kirk Fox?

Well, that's who I saw Sinners with.

Yeah.

What other boyfriend did you see?

Well, I saw Mission Impossible alone.

Oh, my.

Yeah.

This is is grounds for divorce.

You know I love the Mission Impossible movie.

I got a kind of

bummer for you, though.

It's fucking way too long.

I can't believe you saw it without me.

You know we like those stupid movies.

I'll go see it again with you.

No, you're taking me to see it.

Okay.

You're going to sit and look at it.

Here's the thing.

I wanted to see it before it was out of IMAX.

Oh my.

So I was in L.A.

Selfish.

Well, I was in L.A.

and I had a break between...

Okay.

I had a break between the podcast I had to do and the event so in that time i went to saw i went and saw it and here's the thing it is impressive like it's you're there to watch basically him do stunts

yes because it's tom cruise that's what he that's what he does i know he's like jackie chan now like he does everything it's three hours long that's okay i like watching tom cruise okay is the story good enough to sustain three hours i think it's kind of convoluted i i think they you know they they knew that this was his last one but it's um i i think they tried to do too much with the story where you're like, what's happening?

I feel so betrayed.

Like, I'm so mad at you right now.

I swear to God.

I don't know what to do.

I'm not even married to you.

No, we're not even married yet.

Okay, maybe this will change your mind.

What's up, everybody?

My name is Crush Daddy, and for five bucks, you can see me suck on some big flat.

What do you want from me?

What do you...

Why?

I thought it was about push-ups.

That's a dope chandelier, though.

That is a

dope chandelier.

They shouldn't have it.

Gay guys have good taste.

I'm a raw.

Ah, these two.

Yeah, I'm so bummed that Louis and Lestad are like openly gay in this show.

Really?

Yeah.

Bothers me.

I don't want to see them.

Fucking.

They're vampires.

Yeah.

They're just supposed to be companions.

They're not supposed to be like full love birds.

I know.

No, I didn't get to talk about this.

Oh,

I got invited to

WWE Raw

and I went.

And I got there.

And I was like, I wonder if people here are like

mad at me, you know?

Sure.

Because I got there during rehearsal.

Like, I'm arriving, and there's like people training and everything and like getting ready for the show.

And we're hanging out.

Some wrestlers come up to me and they're like, what's up, man?

Like, super nice.

And I was like, oh, cool, cool.

And then, because you know, it was several years back where

it was pretty vocal, like, yeah, I know, critical.

Um,

and so anyway, then they go, Hey, let's shoot this bit.

Like, they shoot bits backstage of, like, you know, sometimes there's like

an interviewer, and then a wrestler's talking, and then like another one comes in, and they talk shit to each other.

It's like continued drama, right?

So, like, hey, let's shoot this, you know, this bit.

And I'm like, great.

And we're about to roll.

And then I see this guy in a suit.

He's like, hey,

come here.

I go, what?

He goes, come here.

I go, what's up?

He goes, hey, I forget his name.

He's like, Vince McMahon.

No, no, no.

Not him.

But they're like, he's the VP or whatever of WWE or something.

I was like, oh, hey, what's up, man?

He goes, hey, everybody here knows that you said that they're retards.

Did he say that word?

Like that.

I was like,

amazing.

I go, you do?

He goes, oh, yeah, everybody knows.

I was like, cool.

And I thought he was about to be like, you should get out of here or something.

You know what I mean?

I didn't know what he was going to say.

He's like, no, we're super happy to have you.

He goes, you know, we should just kind of like address it in some way.

I'll go, yeah, yeah.

And so we do, we, you know, we do like a little interview thing where I'm like, oh, yeah, you know, I've said some crazy things and I'm here to have a good time.

Here's the thing.

All the wrestlers were the fucking nicest pro athletes I've ever met.

Like,

so nice.

I mean, I can't emphasize how nice they were.

Even sent me messages later.

It was so great to meet you.

And I was like, you know, I was so impressed with the show.

Yeah.

And like, you know, it's a spectacle, but like very fun.

Like, the whole environment is fun.

They put on this great show.

They're incredible athletes and they're also dramatic performers, right?

It really is like an exciting event.

And then, you know, I left there.

I was like, oh, that was actually really, really fun.

But I just wanted to say, though, if you think that mystic rick won't come back and get involved you're missing out on something here

like tom is one thing i have an open mind and i'm i'm enjoying what i'm enjoying but if you want to invite mystic rick into the ring

do you know that they they called out mystic rick no i heard that yeah yeah i can't believe they remembered mystic rick pat mcafee was doing the call live and this wrestler came flying through a table and on the broadcast, he's like, That guy almost ended up in Mystic Rick's lap.

You got to pull that, man.

You guys have to pull that.

That's unbelievable.

Well, you have to imagine anybody that puts their heart and soul into wrestling is actually really nice, cool.

It's such a cool thing.

Yeah.

Do they have they had like a gay wrestler, like a gay black wrestler?

I don't know.

It's a good question.

They should.

I met one that sure seemed like it, but I don't know.

Any, would you stop watching wrestling?

Stop watching.

If there is a gay black wrestler?

Yeah, I guess I'd have to stop just obsessing about wrestling.

Yeah, if that happened, it would be very upsetting.

These guys are huge, though.

Holy crap.

Some of them are really big.

Some of them are just like, yeah, incredible talent, though.

It's fun, though, right?

Yeah.

Oh, my God.

We didn't even hit up your favorite thing of the time.

I mean, I've been waiting on this for a minute, guys.

Listen, it's the slap heard around the world.

And people have to know, you have been goddamn obsessed with this.

Brigitte Macrone, a.k.a.

Big Daddy Macrone.

And I read the book that Candace Owens recommended, Becoming Brigitte.

I was deep on Candace's podcast talking about this.

So the theory goes, allegedly, that Brigitte Macrone, which is Emmanuel Macron's wife,

is actually

Emmanuel Macron's dad, a trans woman.

What the fuck?

Watch this fucking slap.

If you guys haven't seen this.

If you haven't seen this, it's...

So first of all, watch.

Okay, watch the slap and then we'll go to that image thing.

So here is Macron.

That's crazy.

Getting off the plane.

And you see it's two hands mushing.

She gives him a double-handed mush to the...

Oof.

And he's stunned.

And then he sees the...

That's the thing is you see him see the cameras too, right?

Of course.

Like as the push, he just stands there and he's like, uh.

And then

he did the

interview afterwards.

He's like, No, it's all he claims that they were play fighting, that that's how they play with each other, but that was not a playful mush.

No, that's not like you and I used to play.

We'd push each other in the bushes for walks.

No, this is other

level.

So, look at this.

I found this on TikTok where I get all my news.

Here's little that's Brigitte Macrone.

Oh,

and that's Emmanuel's dad

telling you.

So, this family.

This is such a crazy story.

So, this story is wild.

So, apparently, these people are from like the Rothschild family, which is known as like an old-school Illuminati, wealthy French family.

They're billionaires and blah, blah, blah.

And they've intermarried one another for generations.

You marry your cousin, you marry your brother.

How the royals do, basically.

It's the same inbred shit.

And basically, just in the last generation, they stopped doing it because now it's frowned upon in society.

But I'm telling you,

first of all, you never laid hands on me.

I think you might.

If I fucking double mushed your face,

like if I put hands on you, Tommy.

Well, I don't think I would go crazy, but I would definitely be pretty upset about it.

Yeah.

If I fucking slapped you like that, bro.

If it was a slap to the face, I would definitely grab you.

Yeah.

I'd be like, what the fuck are you you doing?

What are you doing?

Yeah, but he doesn't.

But you notice he's stunned.

And then he looks at the well, he looks at the camera.

Oh, shit.

But he didn't even look angry.

Play that again.

No, he didn't look.

He's used to being fucked with like that.

Do you know what I'm saying?

Like, he's used to being fucked with like that.

Yeah.

Because he's not, he's just like, oh, yeah, she's doing that again.

Hi, everybody.

Yeah.

He's like, are you crazy?

The fucking doors open right now.

Baby, you might throw me down those stairs.

If I did that to you.

Come on.

yeah you would throw you down the stairs if i had the disrespect that is such disrespect to your husband also no way have no self-awareness that the door's open and your president of your country is about to go in front of all these cameras it's wild yeah he's like you

i mean i think it's absolutely wild that a woman would

What is she 30 years older than him?

She's like 70.

So that tracks with her being the dad's age, which is so crazy.

That is his dad?

That's what they're saying.

Come on, man.

That's the rumor.

She's 72 and he's 46.

Right, right.

And like, there's a whole thing to a hundred.

So he and I are essentially the same age.

Yeah.

This would be the equivalent of me being with a 71-year-old.

Taught, right?

You want to bang a 71-year-old?

That's insane.

I know.

And they say things like about how she walks and her posture and how she sits.

She's very, like, there's shots of her, how she moves, being very masculine.

It's insane.

I think it's true.

I mean, look, i think it's true i think it's weird and true it's a sweet note to wrap this episode up on um

it was uh push him down the stairs it's been it's but do you notice that he takes that beating like yeah it's your dad yeah where you're just like whatever i deserved it yeah i guess i was out of line i guess i was a bad boy mommy daddy daddy mommy yeah wifey yeah

weird bro weird

um we have to run early today apologize button there's a lot of crazy stuff happening here.

Um, this was fun.

I had a good time.

I had a good time with you, even though you saw the Mission Impossible movie without me.

I'll take you to see it anyway.

Okay, thank you.

Um, thanks for watching.

Thanks for listening.

We love you, and we'll see you next week.

Love you, mommy bye.

Good morning, Julia, and Julia.

Wish you a great day, great day.

Everything is single, I think.

True, I tricked them all, chicken light.

Very end my end mind.

Let's go full trial, full trial, full trial.