#2759 Below Deck Down Under S03E06: Capsized and Highly Prized

#2759 Below Deck Down Under S03E06: Capsized and Highly Prized

March 11, 2025 1h 7m Episode 2759 Explicit

In the wake (get it??) of a jetski incident, the crew ups its game to entertain the guests on Below Deck Down Under. There can only be one solution: captain in a kimono.  Also, a new sous chef arrives and only has to wait 13 minutes before a guy tries to make out with her! To watch this recap on video, listen to our Traitors bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens

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Watch What Crappens Watch What Crappens Watch What Crappens Who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens Watch What Crappens Watch What Crappens Who cares what happens when there's so well. It is Tuesday.
We're talking below deck down under wider. But first, just a gentle reminder that we are going on the road this weekend.
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So that is all the news I have today for everyone. Ronnie, is there anything you want to add to that? No.
thanks you did great you're doing great carly doing great carly so now it's time for below deck down under um previously uh a lady named india tumbled off of her jet ski and today we report she's no longer with us no she's fine she died she She died. She's fine.
She's fine. She got her knee on some coral, which is unfortunate.
But we saw a very prolonged sequence of bubbles and flopping around in the ocean because that GoPro was going around in circles. They made it seem like something really terrible had happened to her.
But she's fine.

She's fine.

She was fine.

But yeah, they did.

They were like, you'd only see splashing.

But then every time the camera went underwater, they were in like two feet of water.

I was like, okay.

I know.

I know we need some drama on this show.

But come on, now it's two feet.

Still, though, you know, if you're scared of water, I mean, if you're scared of water, don't get on a jet ski, obvi. But, you know if you're scared of water i mean if you're scared of water don't get on a jet ski obvi but you know you're on a boat i get it you know she was scared uh the real villain here is vion but you know i don't hate vion still i feel like the show's telling me they're giving me all of the signs that i should hate vion but i don't why yeah i'm i'm just in a state of dislike with him i think that's the same thing i said last but I don't.
Why? Yeah, I'm just in a state of dislike with him. I think that was the same thing I said last week.
I don't hate him, but I am disliking him. You know, he...
Yeah, yeah. Do you think he has beefcakes privilege? I think that I like him because he's a go-go boy in a gay bar.
And I don't know, I feel motherly towards those boys. I don't think I've ever gotten a boner from a stripper.
Even when I was younger, I was always like, oh, you know, here's a number for, I don't know, community call. I'm like, I want to help them.
I'm like, do you need to, it's cold out here, you want my jacket? You know? Yeah. Well, you eating anything other than a protein shake today? Come have some of these french fries so johnny johnny is like india i'll hold you do you feel safe now i'll hold you and i was like whoo johnny um johnny i feel like every episode i think johnny's getting more and more attractive although at the by the end of this episode i was like and he went back down to being johnny again but like he was on a great streak for me of getting hotter and hotter until he got drunk.
So when he was like, I'll hold you. Do you feel safe now? I was like, am I getting the vapors from Johnny in this ocean right now? No.
You want me to feel safe? Hold my groceries. Okay? Don't hold me.
Hold my car battery as you change it. You know what I mean? Do something.
And this is when we see them standing in the water. They're literally standing in the water.
It's like up to their hips. It's like, you'll be okay in this two feet of water.
Let me hold you. And he's like, grab the handle.
I'll push you up. I'm slowly.
She's like, oh my God, I'm bleeding. I'm dying.
I've been cut by a coral. Well, think about how the coral feels.
It's like, how much did these fucking people already put me through? And now I have somebody kicking me? Jesus, why don't you just piss on me while you're here? Maybe it was just coral from the real world who just had like a little knife down there. She's like, why aren't i ever called for the challenge you know i would that would be actually my concern would be cutting myself on coral because i know you could get what's it called coral burn or coral rash or something like that where when you you cut yourself on coral and it like gets infected and it burns intensely and i remember my friend told me that before i first went scuba not scuba diving snorkeling and i was deathly afraid of nicking my leg or anything on coral so i was i wasn't afraid of sharks i was afraid of coral the entire time and i was like i was i was very very uh i was very concerned because you make it on coral guess what a shark's like? Blood.
You know, and they smell it in the water, and they come eat you. It's like how strippers smell french fries on me, and they come all around.
It's like strippers who want a nice, warm coat, and they're like, Ronnie will give me a coat. Yeah.
So Johnny's like, this is fucking disaster. Everyone is safe.
But obviously obviously jet skis have been leaking we should definitely check it before giving it to guests yeah and he's like the deck team fucked up yeah vian fucked that one up big time yeah he did so um i'm only giving him five dollars india yeah not he's not going to get a round of tips a large round of tips so India's basically asking if Vian is going to go back and get Johnny who's been left in the ocean imagine if he's like no we're just going to leave him there that's it he's been fired and he's going to find his own way home of course Johnny's always left out in the middle of the ocean isn't he that's kind of his vibe so then of course vian tells uh he like uh what's his face captain jason's like right there so beyonds like oh johnny capsized which is kind of like you could also say you like he really just he really threw johnny um under the bus pretty pretty swiftly on that one yeah he threw him under the runner. And he continues to try to through this whole time, which is really funny.
And I love that Jason doesn't buy it. He's like, you think you're the first go-go boy to work on this boat? Seriously.
Squat right now. It's like giving him the full prison exam.
So he's like, all right, just go get him. So they send him and Harry just kind of looks over.
He looks over and beyond. And he's like, all right, just go get him.
So, they send him, and Harry just kind of looks over. He looks over and beyond, and he's like, well, the jet ski's overturned.
Not good. Not good.
And then Adair's like, oh, you didn't do bad at all. Just a little scrape, yeah.
I don't even think you'll need a band-aid or anything. Which, you know who's been injured does not want to hear that i want to hear like oh my god you came through this your leg is almost falling off we're gonna save you is there anybody you want to call do you have facetime let's get your mother on the phone it's all gonna be okay boop boop boop boop come back to us come back i don't want to hear like this is is nothing.
Why are you crying? Yeah, exactly. Oh, somehow this, you making all those noises set my Siri off.
I don't know how or why, but like my phone just started glowing. And it was like, could I help with a bandaid? I don't even know how Siri has ever called the police for herself.
She was like, please get me out of this house. It please get me out of this house it is really cute how they are um like how they treat india going forward because i mean realistically speaking she went out on a jet ski she fell into the ocean she nicked her she she got like a small cut she came back like overall it was scary for mom but no big deal but then they spend the rest of the episode being like we've got to save this charter you know we've got to really put all the stops at dinner tonight we got to make sure everything's okay and i was like that's how i want to be treated next time i get a very minor injury if i have a hangnail i want everyone on the boat to be like he's got a hangnail we've got to step it up everyone to make sure this charter does not go into the shitter because he's got a hangnail yeah i want them to make a big deal out of it, not just be like, he's got a hangnail.
We've got to step it up, everyone, to make sure this charter does not go into the shitter, because he's got a hangnail. Yeah, I want them to make a big deal out of it, not just be like, you're okay.
You know, Adair, you suck at this. So then back to Vion drama, he's like, I think it's the jet ski.
I think there's a leak in it. Yeah, we know.
They told you. Many times, multiple times.
And Johnny's like, definitely leak. And he's like, well, can we just connect it to this and show it in then? And he's like, we can try.
And he's like, quick, a big wave is coming. You're in two feet of water.
Calm down. You drag it back, Messer Upper.
So Jason is like all concerned. He just wants to make sure India's okay.
And she's like, yeah, you know, I was a little scared. But Johnny was in control.
And he's like, okay, good to hear. So then Adair's talking to Harry.
And she's like, well, you know what? Remember when we tried to lift it? And I was like, maybe it's full of water. And it was.
That sounds harsh, but it really was. Like, you know what? Because I already knew.
I already knew it was leaking. And Harry's like, all right, well, that's lovely.
So the jet ski comes back. They bring the jet ski back.
And the jet ski kind of like, help! And it's like, essentially, it's about to drown into the ocean. It's like doing Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic at the end.
It's about to go over the raft. It's like, save yourself! You're richer than me! So the whole thing is that it's...
Leonardo DiCaprio, there a 23 year old for me even in the afterlife i'm kind of seeing ariel so i'll catch you next time so yeah it's almost it's almost sinking down it's like oh my god the jet ski what are we gonna do we can't get it up with this lift because lift isn't strong enough for the guest ski we're gonna have to empty out the jet ski, what are we going to do? We can't get it up with this lift because the lift isn't strong enough for the jet ski. We're going to have to empty out the jet ski that's somehow filled with water.
Jason's like, we need a plan B. And I was like, damn, that jet ski had a fun time last night.
So then Johnny must have held it. Plan baklava.
I would not mind that. So Jason's like, he's like, well, we need to drain the water first.
Just give me the line. Okay, we got to do it.
Hurry up. Call the engineers.
Call Fritz and Bitz. We'll get them down here because we need to get this thing on.
So they like, they somehow, these guys pulled this heavy ass jet ski onto one of those little floaty platforms. Yeah, fucking Fritz and Bits.
They're out there like, what do you need? What do you need? We were taking a nap. They're like, Fritz and Bits, you have to do something today, okay? Now what's the time we haul up jet ski? Fritz is like, I have one question about this jet ski.
When did Netflix start showing commercials? Like, Bits. Supposed to be concentrating on the boat.
Yeah, come on. Hurry up, guys.
Back when we used to work for Putin, boats, we just let them sink. Well, we don't go for Putin anymore.
This is a big job we need to call Spider. It's Bits, Spider.
Come on, can we all work together here? It's going down the water spot.

Get it.

All right. Fritz and Bits are doing their little gag thing again.
It's no time for laughter. There's a jet ski that's about to die.
It's going to be a total loss. I can't have my plug for the Captain's Lounge kimono line messed up by this jet ski.
All right. so so then

Laura's saying

how

I pride myself

on professionalism and giving the guests the best experience. It's just a big shit show right now.
So then they're still working on getting this thing up and it's just crazy and scary. And then Johnny goes to his cabin to shower because he's exhausted because he basically just spent an hour pushing heavy machinery through the ocean.
So, wow, that's a workout. Meanwhile, though, Vian's having the time of his life.
He's taking photos and just having a fun time. Yeah, and he's like, fucking hell, girl.
I've never worked on anything like that in my life. In my nine years yachting.
Harry, take a photo of me. It's like taking taking a picture like he's a hero of the day who he's the one who sent out that leaky ass thing and then do the work to bring it back in and poor johnny's upstairs who's taking his picture nobody yeah no one is he's like we're going to laugh about this moment for years to come yeah what when you went out on a jet ski and barely had to lift a finger while john Johnny is the one who flopped over into the water and then had to push this thing and haul it onto a floaty.
Yeah, you're going to have a great story for the unemployment line, Vian. So then Laura's talking to India and gives her a pinot grigio as consolation, which, by the way, I would nick my knee more often if it meant that I would just get a Pinot Grigio right in front of me.
And then that was very sex in the city of me to say, well, if I knew I'd get a free Pinot Grigio, I'd nick my knee every single day. I mean, if Pinot Grigio is what you get after some kind of trauma, I mean, my family must be just in a constant state of recovery.
You're like, better check all the kneecaps of your family members for cuts. How many corals have scraped you people? Jesus Christ.
Well, you know what? I love Pinot Grigio. So, Zarina, meanwhile, is talking to me.
Did the corals scrape me or did I scrape the coral? Okay. That's all I'm saying about it.
You know what? I'm sorry that you're dying in the ocean, but maybe next time try to live on the land, okay? Who lives in the ocean? I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
You deserve to get bleached. So, Serena is checked in on, she's checking in on Vianna.
He's my favorite man in the whole wide world. me i know i know that you're upset give me a hug come to mama put your head right in my boobies that's my boy i'm gonna make you a soup that you eat with a fork so then um marina's like marina's talks to him and says like oh so you guys are good outside what's the deal you seem stressed he's like yeah we're good he's giving her like the cold shoulder now because he's afraid that she's falling in love with him yeah and he's pint-sized and highly prized and um serena as he walks away she's like i love you i love you oh my god lady you.
You're making me sad, Serena. Jesus.
So, Laura's saying, oh, we have to make this up to the Charterger. So, basically, tonight we're going all out.
I was thinking tape and streamers. I've got one.
I can one-up that for you. How about we get the candles out? Big candles.
That's Jason's, that's literally what he says. We are going to go all out.
We're going to put out big candles tomorrow. It's like, that's it.
That'll do it. What about a red tablecloth? We could put a red tablecloth.
It could be draped on things. And he's like, wow, yes, welcome to the captain's lounge.
What happens in the lounge stays in the lounge.

Kimono line.

Kimono line incoming.

Well, the guests have requested a bar hop,

but there's not much bar hopping seen here at the Seychelles.

So we're going to go set up the captain's lounge.

You know, that's what the guests are going to get.

Especially when one of the guests was nearly killed on a jet ski today,

the least I can do is show my furry chest in a kimono.

Available now on kimono.captain.net. why are we acting like they're doing the guests a favor the guest has to go on a bar crawl and instead you're making them drink in the living room yeah i know to a bar just let them go to at least a bar like and not only that oh i'm sorry you're taking them to the living room and you're making them like plug your new kimono line.
Get the fuck out of here. I'd be paying.
They have to pretend like they enjoy seeing their captain like in a state of undress. I think it's awkward.
So meanwhile, this is all this discussion is happening. Well, Marina, for some reason that we never quite understand, know or can appreciate.
Marina has decided to unfold a big-ass table in the laundry room, and she's rearranging it. And so we keep cutting to her, and she's like, this table's getting bigger and bigger, and then she's holding it above, and it's floating, and it's crashing into things.
And it was very stressful, and I still don't really know why she was doing that. Well, I thought she was just trying to move it out of the laundry room, but it was this huge table that she wasn't folding to move.
I didn't really understand what was happening. It's like, I didn't understand any of it.
I was like, this is just a form that her, I think her, this is the form that her anxiety takes. She's like, no, Vian's not talking to me, so must unfold tables to distract myself.
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Okay, let's get to the part now that we've all been waiting for. The part where V-Han apologizes to Johnny for putting him in a dangerous situation by not listening to everybody and keeping that wave runner off the ocean.
Just kidding. So Johnny comes in and Vian's like, okay, boys, give us debrief

because a jet ski does not just capsize.

I'm not on the jet ski.

You're there.

What happened?

What happened?

You sent out a leaking jet ski, bro?

Yeah, we all watched it.

We saw it.

And Johnny's like, well, the wave,

what overturned me, I was right behind her.

The moment we get close to the shore,

as we turn, she leaves the gas

and then immediately I feel sinking.

So Vian's like, so all these things that happened we learn from it so you make mistakes and you learn from the mistakes that you have made because they are fully all your mistakes yeah i mean i should have assessed the situation but you need to put it in the water and if water's coming in and johnny's like yeah remember when they put it in the water and then it came out and it had water coming out and they said, no, that means there's a leak and there's water coming out. And he said, that's normal.
Don't act like they didn't do this gas lighter. Yeah, exactly.
And Johnny's like, well, I would have done it differently, but I'm not the ones making decisions and I'm a good soldier. So then meanwhile- This ain't the war? Yeah.
It's jet skis. So, Laura's asking Zarina what's for dinner, and Zarina's like, well, it's going to be local cuisine.
They said on the thing they wanted chicken curry, so we're going to do a traditional one with lots of lovely, fun flavors. I'm going to have a little more strategy, and we do local cuisine.
Simple, beautiful simple beautiful forks only hopefully no dishes come back this time around uh so jason vian vian do you want to come to the bridge all right so what happened and jason i love jason's just kind of bored with it all face he's like all right mate what happened he's like uh i saw everything and he goes so you saw it happen? He's like, yeah, I had a debrief with Johnny.

And he was driving the jet ski, not Johnny.

As they were turning, she took her hand off the throttle,

and then the whole thing capsized.

And Jason's like, I'm barely awake in this scene, mate,

but that sounds fishy to me, so.

Yeah, Vian leaves out the part that, like,

he started to feel the boat was sinking.

AKA, there was water that was flooding in.

We are not going to cover it up, you know? And that's the slogan of my kimono line, you know? Don't really try to cover it up too much. Let's open the kimono on this discussion.
So it's like accountability. Don't put the jet ski in the water if you think there's a lake in it.
Okay, learn from it. And now, and know our boundaries for next time.
I'm like, boundaries? There's no boundary here. Just don't put expensive ass equipment that's leaking in the ocean.
So if you don't feel like it's safe, we can fix it. Or we don't do it.
That's your job. And if there's a problem with the jet ski, let's get on top of it and fix it.
And off said, that's it. Boundaries learn for next time.
Yeah, do like we do on this boat. We do not want leaky crewmates on this boat.
All right, then. Spreads.
Spreads. Or boundaries.
It's like I say, anytime anyone comes into the captain's lounge, if you don't feel it's safe, don't do it. So, he's like, yeah, this could have been a massive mistake.
Could have had injury could i had a loss could i had a death veon made a poor judgment call and i know it's not going to happen again i shall reward him by making somebody else wear the helmet of stupidity tonight so well otherwise he better watch out he better watch oh by the way someone um wrote us a message and said they heard on another podcast that the sous chef did find he did leave for another job but it didn't last long so it's not oh no that that little fucker probably got fired from that job i want more details me too someone send them to us what happened yeah let's give us all the deets so then uh zarina is sleepy So Marina offers her a matcha. She's like, I'm intolerant of caffeine.
And by caffeine, I mean you. So I can't have coffee or be around you, Marina.
And she's like, well, I can see if there's green juice. And Zarina is just like angry.
Doesn't even want to have like a green juice. Doesn't want anything to do with Marina, basically.
Yeah, she looks at her and continues to drink the Pine Sol or whatever whatever she's drinking i'm not sure what it is but it looks scary and so marina's like okay awkward awkward now it's second day of charter and laura has so much to do she's like oh and by the way veon i've heard a rumor that someone's a world-class stripper so in the captain's lounge you're you're going to strip. Laura is going to have these guys come out shirtless every single episode if she can have it.
Laura's like, I'm perfectly happy being alone. I just want to live in my country home with my dogs.
I'm totally fine. I'm not horny at all.
I'm definitely not horny. Okay, gentlemen, take your shirts off again.
Thank you so much. And until I go into self-imposed quarantine, I'm going to see as much penis as I can.
So let's get this rolling, shall we? Shirts are off. Thank you.
So, yeah, she's basically asking Vian to be a stripper in the captain's lounge. I support it.
And then Marina is done with laundry. So Harry and Vian start talking about Marina.
And Vian's like, I've got a difficult situation on my hands. My kiss is Marina.
I mean, that was just fun. And I didn't mean for someone to fall in love with me.
And maybe I shouldn't have kissed Marina. Oh, no.
Which is the standard fuckboy thing of like, I was just having fun. But she's taking it so seriously she's crazy yeah he's like hopefully there's not someone named tina lined up because anyone with that kind of rhyme they love me they just love me man and harry's like so like tell us about it so what are you gonna do now and he's like i don't know you know actually i'm so confused i haven't even given attention to anyone except for gone on a date with that girl and, you know, flirted with Serena every five minutes, you know?

But if anything, I've given attention to fucking Adair.

I mean, girls, when you kiss them,

they might feel a little bit a certain way.

You know what I mean?

And Harry's like,

that's what happens when you're so good looking.

And I like that when he says,

if anyone, the only one I've given attention to for real has been Adair and they show a clip of him saying like hey i'm coming he's like hi y'all he's like trying to flirt with her and she just gives him a look like ew so uh laura is working on the party and everything and zarina is working on dinner and zarina's like so you guys gonna take it a bit you know a bit a bit easy now like cash cash now you about to go to the next spaces and because she's talking to brie and brianna and she's brianna's like i don't know i mean i feel like i'm not one to initiate things you know but like you know i'm just like waiting and because she's essentially waiting for harry to make some moves on than just, like, a random kiss here or there. But then Harry walks by and overhears everything.
And he's like, what's going on over here? They're cracking up. They're like, oh, my God, the boy heard us talking about him.
She's like, we're just eating strawberry-colored chocolate. It's like, ooh, I'm not listening.
Christ, I can't hear a single word so weird and also why does this girl need to have a discussion about every single thing i think he's clear about liking you and making out with you every time he sees you she's like i'm just getting such big signals from harry it's just so crazy i'm like what what part of waking up every morning staring into your eyes and kissing you and saying, I hope we can do this forever. Don't you understand? He loves you.
But I think she just wants more spice in the relationship. I think she wants more flirtation, maybe.
They don't have to be making out all the time, but something more flirty than Harry just coming by, being like, do you guys want to see me juggle um so all right i've got a string it's tied in a circle i'm gonna put it in my fingers and make different shapes and you're gonna put your hand through and then i'm gonna magically make the string back into a circle anybody down she's like oh god so laura is askingian for some help with the dinner service tonight.

And the deckies are changing into strippers.

And the guests are all sitting down for dinner.

And so, now we're going to finally get our chicken curry bonanza.

And some, by the way, beautiful looking fish.

I thought those pieces of fish that went up to the table those fillets or whatever they were looked gorgeous and i'm sorry but we're not at the fillets yet right now i know i just felt like i was gonna forget it if i waited too long i wanted to give the fish credit i will get this fillet comment and no matter when it is like the southern hospitality. You're like, I will get this filet comment no matter when it

is. It's like the Southern

Hospitality recap. You're like,

oh yeah, by the way. I just wanted to say,

those filets.

They did look good.

Those were nice big filets. They weren't skimping on the

filets. They were huge.

So, Marina's

cleaning down the cabins, and

she's like, oh, this is too much for me to do right now. Too much the cabins are a mess who are these people that do this every single episode when i go to a hotel like my clothing is fairly contained you know like i don't i'm not someone who just like lets it sprawl everywhere or if i do it's kind of like i've set it out because i'm going to wear it later.
But who are these people that just throw their clothing all across their room? It's starting to feel malicious, I have to say. I would agree.
Normally, I'm like, well, you're staying in a hotel room. If it's dirty, that's your job to clean it.
But these ladies are overly rude about it. It's almost like they're taking everything out of their suitcase and throwing it to different parts of the room on purpose like there's shit hanging off lamps there's like how do you how do you do this what do you do like sand everywhere and like they're such nice ladies too like it's it's not like uh they are they're like so they're like really really nice and so but you just sort of feel like they're like really nice and they get in their room and they're like, they like let out all the, they're like, whatever complaints I have about this charter, I'm going to express it by throwing five bathing suits across the room.
Yeah, super weird. But it's not just them.
It's all these charters are like this. I just don't understand it.
No, this one's particularly bad for some, for whatever reason, whenever they show the room, it's like, Jesus, what are you guys doing in this room?

It's like a poltergeist woman there went crazy, got mad about it.

I know.

So Marina and also Marina is getting completely ignored by her man.

So she's in a really bad mood.

So she's like, oh, it's just too much.

I need help with the cabins.

So they're sending a dare.

And Marina just keeps repeating as she sees the dirty room. She's like, I love my job.
I love my job. So she tells Adair what to do, and Adair goes, HARD! Adair sounds like some kind of a bird.
You know when birds aren't really calling. They're just like, I'm here.
She's just like, ah! Congratulations, you just set me off on a tangent because I just read this crazy article in the New York Times about these two women who lived next door to each other in New York City and they were friends, but then one of them got a parrot and she already had two little parrots and then she got like a cockatoo or something like that or a cockatiel and the cockatiel every day would go like this and then the noise of the cockatiel would activate the parrots so the parrots would be like so it's always like and it was every day and it was all day long and it was so loud that the woman the woman who didn't have the parents was recording it. And so they put the recording on the New York Times.
So I listened to it. That's how I know exactly how it sounded like.
And it became a legal battle that lasted 15 years. And they went on each other.
It was crazy. I can see that happening because, you know, when I moved back to LA, I get this house.
I'm so excited. I put all this remodeling remodeling and you know it's like months and months of construction and jackhammering and this and that so I finally get up to the house and I'm in there the first night and it's just silence and I can hear the birds you know like tweet tweet tweet I can hear like nature I'm like this is fucking amazing I can't believe that this is happening in LA and then I just hear I was like what the, what the fuck? So I thought it was an aberration.
You know, I don't worry about it. So I just, you know, relax again.
And then I hear it and I look and the neighbors have a fucking parrot and it's sitting right and they have two and they're sitting right in the kitchen window and that shit never stopped. Thank God they moved because I was to the point.
I was like, how do I kill those? Yeah. This article was crazy because basically the woman who did the non-parit woman, she, she ran a, she worked from home.
She was a PR person. And so she couldn't have phone calls because the, the birds were so loud and then everyone started.
And, but then the girl who had the Paris, she was like, they're my service animals. I have anxiety.
And the parrots relax me. Even though the parrots all day long are like.
I can only be calm by causing the rest of the world anxiety. Go fuck yourself with your anxiety if that's what it is.
And then it became a thing. I'll fucking shove those birds down your throat.
We'll see how anxious you are then. And then the co-op forced her out.
But then she wound up getting like. It was like some bureau.
It wasn't't it was like some bureau that was like tenants rights or whatever took her case or like it became a thing like because she was kicked out and she had a service animal and then the whole thing got escalated to like a million dollar controversy and and the woman who did not have the parents her life is like ruined because she now has anxiety about it. And she stopped having friends because she was like mortified of, I don't know.
It was a fascinating article. You're the one who has the birds.
So she ended up getting anxiety herself. And then the only cure was birds.
So she had to get parrots herself. And then it was just like a cycle that never stopped and she never i mean for me i was just like birds learn some fucking language like have you heard of evolution like parrot something you know like even if the birds were like polly want a cracker like fuck you john or whatever the birds here you know do that but just a pair two parrots sitting next door just going i mean it was just, it wasn't okay.
And you see how I am. I only dealt with this for like a couple of months.
If I was that girl, there would have been some, at the very least, some BB gun action. Oh yeah, for sure.
And like, at first I thought, okay, oh wow. So now like 15 years later, oh, she has anxiety or whatever.
But then they show a picture of her. You see a picture of her when she's younger, when she was like friends with a person.
And then you see her when she's older, you're like, oh yeah, this is a woman who's been through some shit. She's been through paratrama.
Yeah. They have a whole show on one of the murder networks, you know, the networks that are like all dedicated to murder shows and they come up with like random things for murder.
They're like ladies who knit getting murdered. And that's like the whole show.
Every episode is like a lady who lady who knits who got murdered but this one is about your neighbors going crazy it's like neighbor fights and then it escalates to the point where a neighbor kills their neighbor and they're all terror and i'm sure that there's like a parrot story in there there has to be a story oh i'm sure parrots must have led to so many murders now i like the wild parrots that fly around la iawk, they make so much noise, but they're so cute flying around, but that's because they fly and then they go somewhere else. But like if there was one directly next door or like across the street in the, in the window, I would have literally, I would have lost my mind as well.
I get it. I get it.
All right. So back to this, um, Marina's miserable, which somehow led to this.
So then, um, Serena sends up her fish which are fabulous fabulous fillets fabulous fabulous sea bass approved we give it five out of five stars yeah and it has a passion fruit sauce and they love it and then they're like but do i have to eat this with a spoon this is weird do you have it and then they're like guys tina's a colonel you act like you were trained at west point i will say that and tina's like well i think i was conceived at west point and then um more the sea bass is continuing to arrive and the passion fruit sauce is continuing to dazzle the guests they love the passion fruit sauce and everyone's happy and then adair is like well all the beds are turned down and i'm not doing the bathroom so she. And everyone's happy.
And then Adaira's like, well, all the beds are turned

down, and I'm not doing the bathroom, so she

can do the bathrooms herself. So,

she basically decides, I'm gonna have dinner.

And she walks up. Yeah.

So weird. And so Marina's like, are you there?

She's radioing her. Adaira, Adaira, are you there?

And she's like, what's up?

And she's like, um, I mean, are you

still helping? Hey, Lara,

is she still helping me with the cabins? And she's like, she should be. And so Adair's just like, on my way.
So she's like, what happened to you? And she goes, what do you mean? She goes, well, you just did the bed and left. And she's like, oh, I mean, I went to the rooms and turned down the beds.
And then I've been running plates. I mean, what do you want from me? I'm just one sun hat.
Yeah, so Adair's like, yeah, I really don't know what they do in the rooms i mean i'm being pulled in so many different directions always like this boom boom boom this that i'm like a pinball around this boat but i mean i would i wouldn't say i'm a fan of cleaning someone's shit toilet i'm not doing that i'm like so basically you admitted you did as much as you wanted to do and then you went off and ate food yeah yeah because we saw we we saw her eating food. She was not running plates.
Yeah. She's running plates to her mouth.
So now the boys are changing into stripper outfits, and we get Vihan's story. He's like, I do enjoy performing.
I was a shirtless waiter at Beefcakes. It's a gay bar.
Usually around 9 o'clock. And then we get the visual of the clock turning to 9 for some reason.
He's like, we take off our shirt and we do body shots on us right here. Shot glass from chest to penis.
Human shot glass. I feel like they don't do shots off their chest in WeHo.
I feel like they just come around selling shots, but you don't actually get to do body shots off their chest, right? Oh, yeah. You really? You just have to be careful what bar you're at because, you know, some of those bars, some of them you just don't want, you don't want a shot.
Like, you wouldn't ask for that at, like, FUBAR, not that that's around anymore, but back in the day, no one wants a shot from a place that smells like bleach and socks. You will need a shot afterwards, and not the one that goes down your throat.
They offer shots on the way up. So, zarina wants people to come bring her cake up

she's made a coconut cake which looks nice and then lara's asking marina how everything's going

i mean it's like terrible just terrible rooms are terrible sand is terrible adair is terrible

adair dropped me like midway when i asked her and like can you can you help me with things and

she's like no i'll only do bed.

I can only do bed.

That's all.

And Laura's like, oh, babe, I'm sorry.

I have very little sympathy for you because, you know, you were supposed to be doing a job anyway.

But okay, fine.

But either way, Laura's mad.

I've never had a junior crew member pick and choose what jobs they want to do.

Like, this is your job.

You do what your superior tells you to do, and that's it. Now, I can't wait to not say anything to her about it.
I know, right? Laura's the biggest talker into the camera to us, but she doesn't really do anything with everybody else. She's just like, eh, I'll tell Jason about it.
So Jason, speaking of which, comes out in his kimono at the captain's lounge, or he's gonna they're gonna go set that up and everything and laura tells the guests everyone i've just gotten a phone call from captain and they've given you exclusive access to the captain's lounge would you like to go would you like to go to it and they're like whoo so they go in there and um they're like he's there in his kimono and he's all stretched out and they're like, whoa, and it's funny. And everyone's like laughing and stuff.
But I'm with you on this. I don't need that.
You know what I mean? Yeah. Like if I walked in and the captain was like in a kimono, that's a tiny little kimono too, you know? Yeah.
It was like a white lotus kimono where you're waiting for his wiener to just pop out like that dude from White Lotus. Like keep that you know like yeah maybe if it's boner time he's a cute guy it's not like he's job by the hud or anything he's cute but i don't know it's like maybe if it's boner time but not just not right now i don't know yeah it's weird timing to just walk in and see him just laying there in his kimono yeah i agree so then beyond comes out and does his little strip tease and everything and marina's

like oh i want to kiss this freaking gorgeous man throw him on the wall let's kiss a little bit and go back to work we had such a good date but then he disappeared what's the deal men here comes one right now So Jason says the Captain's Land, they're exclusive, VIP only.

It's where you get... Here comes one right now.
So Jason says the Captain's Lounge,

they're exclusive, VIP only.

It's where you get to relax,

put your feet up,

and you never know who might stop by.

You literally know exactly who's going to stop by.

It can only be people from the boat.

I'm going to stop by with a pair of pajama pants for you.

Please stop by with some Haagen-Dazs too while you're at it by the way the captain's lounge is just some pints of haagen-dazs and jenny's ice cream wear whatever you want kimono kimono no kimono sweats where would he get me that ice cream. Yeah.
So Marina is in love.

She's like, I want to kiss this gorgeous man, throw him on the wall.

We kiss, we go back to work, such a good date, but then he disappeared.

What's the deal?

What's the deal with that?

Beefcakes are supposed to be trustworthy men.

And so they're all going on about the captain's lounge and stuff. And the strip dance, What's-His-Buns did.
I didn't mind that. So what is it? No.
Why didn't I mind that? Yeah, I didn't mind that. Did not mind that at all.
It was nice visual. So now everyone, the guests go to bed and Adair is talking to, she's like, wow, I felt like, hey, uh vian i felt like i was watching the intro to a porno with you okay good night i'm going to bed before my head explodes hope your head doesn't explode he's like you don't even understand the depth of what that means for me right now all right good night good night so he's sitting there now she leaves and he's just sitting there now with what's her buns marina and she she's looking at her phone and he's just looking at his watch.
He's like, okay, well, gotta go then. Good night.
She's like, bye. So then Harry checks in with the Brie and we have a really romantic moment.
He's like, are you done? Are you going to bed now? And she's like, yeah, are you done? He's like, sleep well. Well, I filled your water bottle up and I put it in the crew mess somewhere.
What do you think about that? He's like, thank you. Good night.
She's like, oh, damn it. I don't like being the one to make the first move with a water bottle and just having it ignored.
You know, I'm very happy that my love life is sorted. About time, I mean, Brina and I are in a great spot.
We're both on the same page. She gets a little kiss on the cheek every three days.
And, you know, it's just us. You know, we just go at our own pace.
And she's like, I'm horny. I'm horny.
Do me. She's like, I want to know where Harry stands.
I mean, we go on a date, but we don't discuss anything. I mean, does he even know my parents owned an ice cream shop? Does he know I used to date a model and I almost settled down in New Jersey? What does he know? So then it's the final day.
It's the next morning. And Vian's flirting with the dare by saying, your boots are the best.
She's like, yeah, man. Yeah, I'm getting two steps and I'll fucking have to take down to these Johns in a minute.
It's fucking funny. You want to take a closer look? He's like, no, I saw it.
Lovely, lovely boots. She's like, boot in the face.
He's like, well, right. So Johnny's like, shall we do the lines? And Vian's like, I am so in love with Adair.

How am I going to tell her that?

He's like, well, it's something you have to figure out.

At which point Johnny says, for me, I always try to avoid sexual relationship or being on boat

because boatmanses can create turbulence and ruin peace.

I'm more likely to paint my hair pink rather than have a boatman.

Could you imagine?

Pink hair Johnny would be banned from Greece.

Ridiculous.

Pink hair.

See you next time. rather than have a boatman's could you imagine pink hair Johnny would be banned from Greece ridiculous pink hair think about it pink hair I love that he has no patience for Vian he tells him that's something you should figure it out yourself like don't talk to me about it I'm gonna hear about this and poor Vian like but listen to a deer a Adair, her voice.
It's like poetry. I love boobs! Boots are great! You want two steps? So now Jason and Laura's talking to Jason about Adair.
She's like, last night she was meant to be in the cabins helping, but then she kept disappearing, and Marina asked to come help her, but like she said, well, I've done the beds, and that's all I do. kind of like why are you why are you going to jason about this instead of talking to a dare about it first right i feel like this does not need to be escalated like she never she always goes to tattle to jason instead of taking care of her own shit that's bizarre so he's like well i guess i'm part of this now what's a dare up to going to go.
Should I send them now? Should I send them later? So you need to tell her to be inside. So Vianne comes in and he's like, where is she? What's the dare up to? And he's like, oh, she just came outside.
He's like, well, have you told her to be inside? All right. I need communication on this boat.
So then Larix says the whole thing again about the cabins. And Jason's like, all right, well, are always a gray area it's sort of like when you wear a kimono but you're also hanging out with the guests but i think that she's picking and choosing her jobs and no one changes their department unless unless you two authorize it so communication with you guys has to be like this okay go and fix it i don't know why you bothered me with this but go ahead go ahead so as vion leaves he's like this annoys me so much um which this one i can imagine why because but how's he supposed to know the girl's not making the bed or cleaning the toilets whatever but that being said why is it that every time there is a dex do the deck the bosun always acts like the dex do belongs to their department like they always are, oh, I guess we'll loan you the deck stew to help out on the interior.

So he has no right to feel entitled to Adair.

Adair belongs to both departments.

Well, he's not saying he has the only right to Adair, is he?

I know he's not saying that, but his vibe is like that, if you ask me.

I just think he's a general guy.

Why is this lady always giving me shit? Like, geez, I can't even do anything right. Which is not incorrect.
Laura radios, and she's like, Vian, Vian, can we have a day to help with the guest cabins, please? And he's like, oh, God. And Adair was like, that's annoying.
That's annoying. And he's like, all right, well, can we start her on the deck and then move her to interior? And she's like, okay, okay.
So now Marina is working on the cabins, and then Lara Bree and Serena are dancing. Thank you.
And the guests are sad. It's their last day and everything.
And now it's time to lift the anchors and everything. So they're going to do anchors are going to go up.
And then now they're also going to have to now rearrange their cabins because the new sous chef will be arriving. And she's a girl, which means that there's going to be another shuffling around of people.
So Johnny's going to have to move in. Now last week, I saw the CV and I saw that the new sous chef was named Alicia.
And I just jumped to conclusions that it was the same Alicia from below deck sailing.

And I received a few messages that said, actually, below deck sailing Alicia, her name is spelled differently.

And also she's a different person than the Alicia that does.

Spelled like I-L.

Yes.

So I messed up.

I failed.

I failed as a podcaster.

And I'm just waiting for an apology. I apologize I failed.
I failed as a podcaster and I am just waiting for an apology. So I apologize.
Okay. I apologize for putting my theory, my leaky theory out into the water.
It's not safe. You're leaky Lisa.
Yeah. So somebody's new, somebody new is coming and I did not know any of this information you just gave me.
So I thought it was going to be the other Alicia. And I was like, her hair looks great.
So they're doing the cabin swap and all that good stuff. And Adair's like, I hope we get a lot of money today.
And Marina's like, okay, since we're here, listen, the bed, amazing. You're doing a great job.
But just make sure the towels are clean. There's clean floors.
We need more. And she's like, well, I wasn't meaning to meaning to leave you yesterday it's just like sometimes i do the needs and then i get dragged off you know there's like food to eat there's drinks to drinks yeah you know sometimes i just get dragged off by myself dragging myself off to doing something more fun that's it so uh they're like okay it's fine so then um now adair has to go back out on the deck huh life of attacks too and now it's time to come in to dock we're gonna dock it's gonna be scary it's gonna be whatever and then harry's talking to adair and he's like what are those um i'll talk i guess he's talking about fake boobs i don't remember this they're like gel cutlets you know i think oh Yeah, he's got like a bag of like the little, the chicken cutlets.
Yeah. He's like, all these fake boobs.
And Dara's like, they're boobs. Yeah, she's like, they're boobs.
And poor Bree's like, oh my God, those boobs are getting more from Harry than me. I just need to have a talk about it.
So the guests say goodbye. They give a nice little speech.
Like we had the best time ever. We're just so excited to go to our hotel now and leave our clothes on every single surface.
So they go and they're happy. They're a lovely crew.
I'm sorry, lovely set of guests. Charter group.
And now it's time to change out of your blues. Change into your blues and clean the boat and turn it over and get ready for a tip meeting all right all right first we got to talk about the helmet of death uh we're getting fifteen thousand dollars so that's great everybody for 48 hours not bad all right the helmet of death is going to uh i'm just kidding because he worked at beef cakes i respect the game game.
Please be one of my models for Captain's Lounge.

The one going under the bus is Johnny,

who saved a woman's life and dragged her back

after her leg was almost decapitated, delegitated by a coral.

Delegitated.

So, by the way, we have...

Decapitated by a coral.

Man's greatest enemy, the great coral reef. Thankfully, we've almost killed the thing, everybody.
So, for a few more super yacht trips right over it, we should have it dead in no time. All right, we have a sous chef coming in this afternoon.
She's a she. So, we'd like to accept any volunteers from the deck crew to make some awkward and unpleasant advances on her who would like to volunteer as tribute.
All right, Johnny, great. We'll see you later tonight at the bar.
Listen, it's been a while. It's been a couple of months since a Below Deck franchise has had sexual complaints, sexual harassment complaints.
So I think we need to get that taken care of tonight. Get on it, disco head.
So then Laura and Zarina are talking, and Zarina's talking about how it's like, you can't just like shut off a crush. And Laura's like, I mean, that's what I mean.
I mean, if a guy likes you, he will never make you doubt that. And that's what you need.
You need someone, you don't need to settle for anything else just because someone's here. And Zarina's like, or alternatively, I could settle for the guy who basically doesn't like me.
And I'll just keep lowering my bar for him. I think that sounds like a good game plan for me.
Yeah, Zarina's like, what's wrong with settling? Without settling, we wouldn't have countries, would we? You know, be traveling all the time. Someone's got to travel.

So then they're saying that they hope the new sous chef is nice, etc.

And then Harry is talking to Marina,

and he's like, are you off of Vian?

What's going on?

And she's like, no, I'd like to get with him again,

but he's a cool guy, but we don't talk.

Not a word for three days.

He's like, but I didn't talk to Brie for three days look how happy she is that's her pulling out her hair looking at pictures of her old fiance being like right i should have given him a chance got to her at the window mascara running down her face talk to me says arena is excited for the sous's like i love a fresh start i think it's going to be great it's time for some girl power in the galley please don't be like anthony please don't be like anthony please please enjoy only using forks so then in comes alicia she goes she comes on she's she's blonde she's perky she's sweet she's nice she's pretty so she's gonna have all these guys um doing gross things to her she's baby caroline stanbury face oh it's crazy that's all i could see once i saw it i was like wow it's caroline stanbury so she meets everybody and we find out a little bit about her she's like i first got into yachting as a deck juice a deaf deck stew chief stew sorry i love

food i like the smell i love the color but like i'm starting green to be honest you know like i'm gonna wing it but hopefully it'll work out i don't even know where the seashells was why would you build a town on a seashell i mean it's how do you make streets there's everything on wheels just goes back and forth.

Idiotic.

And she said the seashells.

I mean, but actually, can you believe it? That's an actual seashell in the middle of the ocean that they turned into a resort. I didn't know there was a fish that big.
So then Harry tells Vian that he's in the doghouse, the marina, because he hasn't spoken to her. And Vian's like, oh, no.
So then Alicia's going down. She's meeting everyone.
And Serena's so excited. She's like, I feel like a firecracker coming into my galley.
I love the positive energy. I love her attitude.
I can't wait to make her do dishes all day long. I can't wait to see what she serves spoons with just instinctually and what she doesn't.
This is going to be great for science. So they all go out and they're having dinner and everyone's in a great mood because they've got a new person, which means the guys are just going to ask stupid questions now.
Vianne even goes so far as to whip out pictures of children because that's that's like the most desperate move when a guy's like oh let me show you my niece and nephews like oh oh great so he's like what what is your favorite cuisine to cook and she's like um thai food it's where you basically take a necktie and you put it into a stew delicious they're like oh that sounds wonderful so they're all excited that she's into that into Thai food and then um you know they are what's your favorite color what's your hair color how old are you what year were you from and she goes I'm 25 and Johnny goes oh 98 like yeah look at me math nothing it 99. So.
Yeah, and she's like, well, you look so much older, Johnny. He's like, thank you.
So then Vian is talking, yeah, he's talking to Adair and he's showing the pictures of the nephews and everything and she's like, cool. And then he's like, here's another child.
Does this give me dimension? She's like, cool. Here's another child.
What about this one? Okay. She's totally unfazed by him.
The guys are trying really, really hard. Do you play Candy Crush? I'm really good at Candy Crush.
Look at my score. Johnny's like, I went to prom one time.
Look at me, Dad. Calm down.
Johnny's like, look, I got Werdel in five tries. New record for me.
for me they're like oh that's great great johnny so um so then brian lauren zarina go to the bathroom and zarina's like tonight is the night of vian they're like but you know he he you know he you know you know vian likes to be approached you should try that you know know? And she's like, should I give him a rose in front of

everyone? I feel like the more normal we talk,

the more talking is normal, right?

It's like, that's very Sondheim-sounding

of her. Sure.
Go for it.

So she does. She comes and she

walks right up to him and she gives him a rose

and then she grabs his head and he like

puts his head in her chest. He's like, oh, yeah.

And he hugs her close.

But then to us, he's going, oh, fuck, my heart is with the with the deer well then why are you acting like why did you do that why do you like it's like these guys it's like you don't have to do these things you don't have to like you can just take the rose you don't have to pull her in and then nuzzle onto her boobs so then um he's like oh but obviously this is not going away so i need to first solve this problem before I can move on here. So then they go after the club.
Surely if I just lap dance on her face, maybe she'll get the right impression. Yeah.
So then he, to his credit, unlike someone like a Carl or whatever, well, it's going to be half credit, because I'm revoking half of the credit in a moment, but to his credit, he goes to Zarina and Marina and he basically gives them both a spiel of like, I just want to say that our dates is absolutely amazing to me, but I have like, you have to be honest with you. I have feelings for Adair and I cannot be in love with everyone, which is such a strange way of putting it.
Like I can only, unfortunately, we only have a few slots available for me to be in love with and those spots have been taken. We do appreciate your application and we wish you the best of luck in future love endeavors.
Yeah, but then to Serena, it looks like he's saying the same thing, but it's not exactly the same thing. To her, he says, you're such a cool girl.
girl honestly i cannot be in love with everyone i think

you're an amazing person you're fucking amazing she's like i know so did he break up with serena too i think he did i think they were just cutting it back and forth to make it to show that he really was on kind of a personal script so uh so he said i have feelings for a dare to serena i think he did. I think you did.
I think that was the implication.

Because of so.

Yikes. So I gave him

credit. No, my half credit's coming in the moment.
Because then, so now Serena, because Serena goes up to Laura and goes, well, he's in love with Adair. So then Johnny.
Oh, yeah. I didn't catch that part.
Yeah. Yeah.
Okay. Yeah.
So then Johnny's dancing with Alicia and they're like dancing a lot and having lots of fun and he's drunk. And then he tries to go in for a kiss.
Well, he says something like, he's like, you have awoken something inside of me that has not been awoken in so many hours. It scares me.
Okay. It scares me.
You have awakened a beast. I saved a woman's life today.
I'm like, sir. Sir, it's been two hours.
And it's been like two hours and it's been all group setting too. And so she goes in for a kiss and she basically puts the hand out and was like, no.
Although actually, I mean, she's definitely attracted to him, but she's also like, I may be attracted to you, but I also have some personal standards. So let's wait more than five seconds.
Yeah, she's like, Johnny, darling, I've literally met you for five seconds, please. He's like, but our beast has awakened.
It's a little boner. Put it away, please.
Put it in your waistband like you do the rest of the days on this boat. I've just come here, all right.
I shall not be given away in the first five minutes. Because that's what the guys try and do.
They're like, oh, new girl, who can get her first? Jumper! And she's like, every single time I look into his eyes, I'm like, ah, he's a gorgeous man, but I don't know him.

It's just too much too soon.

We'll see.

We'll see.

So then, and of course, everyone watched this happen.

You know, like Bree and Laura watched and Bree's like, did he just kiss her?

And I was like, no, he tried.

She goes, oh, I'm so jealous.

I wish Harry would try that.

So Harry's like, that's what I was, that's what I was fearing when I kissed Bri for the first time.

But guess who bagged a model?

Guess who's dating a model?

Who is dating a model?

She's a model.

So then Serena, who's just been dumped, even though she wasn't in a relationship with this guy, but she was just told not interested, goes up to Vian and takes his shirt.

And she's like, you, come into the van with me. Yeah.
He's like, okay. So he does.
Yeah. So then in the van, Zarina's like, Johnny, are you in love? And he's like, no, not in love.
That's a heavy word to use, first of all. I am just full of boner.
Front are very attractive. We vibe together, that's all.
So in the other car, they're gossiping, and Lara's like, did Vian have a conversation with you tonight? And Harry's like, tell me, tell me. And Marina's like, well, Vian broke up with me today, okay? Well, not kidding.
I mean, I'm kidding. But he said that he liked somebody and he wanted to pursue that.
And Lara's like, oh, it's Adair. He's in love with Adair.
But the thing is, Adair doesn't even know about it. And so they're cracking up.
And Bree's just like, yeah, I feel like Adair's just Adair. So then they go back on the boat, and Harry, Bree's showing Harry the sand in the cabins, and Zarina's talking to Vian, and she's like, are you naked? And he's like, no.
She's like, are you? And he's like wearing these like teeny tiny tiny tiny bungee smugglers like tiny tiny. So she's like like she is horned up like crazy.
I mean can't blame her. Those are real real tight.
It's like do you enjoy torturing me? Is that something that you like to do? And he's like I i should take a shower she's like oh god fine fine you're leaving footprints everywhere mister oh little does he know i love footprints oh i hate you i hate strong men geez so then she grabs him and starts like making out with him in the hallway right that was at the end of the episode yeah so then um harry meanwhile is like all right time for me to make my big move so um well oh actually maybe it did happen because harry harry goes i think this is we may have skipped over it but harry and harry brings Bree into the guest cabin, and it looks like they're going to spend the night. That's usually when it's off charter and you go into the guest cabin, that means you're going to do it.
So he's in there with Bree in the guest cabin, and then they kiss, and then he's like, well, we got a lot of work to do tomorrow, so I guess we should probably go to sleep.

Or no, because the sheets aren't on the bed.

She's like, oh, we already took the sheets off the bed.

So he's like, all right, well, what should we do now?

And she's like, I don't know.

I would hate for you to have to make a bed.

I mean, Jesus Christ, this is not the man you want to end up with.

He's like, well, no sheets on the bed.

Guess we can't do anything on the bed. What would we do? Put sheets on it? Yeah, have the man make the bed if he wants a little.
But he doesn't. And she's like, I mean, I wish we could cuddle and watch a movie.
And he's like, we have so much work to do tomorrow. Oh, boy.
And then this is where then Zarina and Vian have this moment where they're kind of like kissing jokey and then kissing for real and then it looks like they're really she grabs him and pulls him off camera and starts making out with him and he's like okay okay and she's like that's what she's like i hate you i hate strong men oh he just dumped you yeah and then um the other, but this is where I, this is the half credit.

This is where he deducted because Vian is so that sort of guy that's like, okay, I'm

going to break up with you all because that's the mature thing to do.

And then now that he has established a boundary that he's not into you, he will then come

and make out with you. And then when you're like, well, we were just, we're making out.
He'll be like, yeah, but I already told you I'm not into you. That was just for fun.
You're being crazy right now. So that's why he lost credit with me because it was like his whole life.
Serena also loses credit with me. Like get some self-respect.
The man just dumped you and she's like, oh, come here. Oh, God, God, I have god you're such a strong man like oh girl got a hold of yourself it's embarrassing a man's just used by all you know what i mean like you don't go to the grocery store and just take home the the little dispenser in front that gives everybody the antro antibacterial soap that's for everybody so yeah so they make out it It was actually exactly in the place that you said it happened.
I was wrong. And then Harry goes into his cabin and he is like, you guys, I just had the best make out session ever.
Like, I kissed her on the lips for about three seconds. No tongue, but like we're working towards it.
It was just so good.

I mean, she wanted to cuddle up and watch a movie. Too soon for that.
Too soon for that, Mariah.

Too soon for halfway to first base.

Well, by the whore of Babylon, not doing that yet. And then it cuts to Brie, who's all frustrated

getting into bed. She's like, oh God, this man can't make a move to save his life.

And she says, if he doesn't do something quick,

this is going to fizzle out.

Yeah,

it's going to probably fizzle out.

That's the end of that one.

That was the episode.

Thanks, everyone, for being here.

We'll be back

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