#2751 RHOBH S1414 Part Two: Runway or Another I’m Gonna Get You Get You Get You Get You

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Speaker 2 Watch what crappiness.

Speaker 2 Watch what craft is. Who cares what happens? But there's so much good crap.

Speaker 2 Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. This is part two of the recap.
If you missed part one, go check out your podcast feed.

Speaker 2 It's right there. And without further ado, let's get right back into the recap.

Speaker 2 So now Erica's in her kitchen and she has some champagne and she's like, Ma!

Speaker 2 You want to go drink a bottle of champagne out in the cabana? Turns out there's one other spot we forgot to do on our HUTV tour. She's like, yes, okay.

Speaker 2 So now we see the cabana went from looking one way to looking another way.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And Shuck, aren't you proud of me, Mama? She's like, oh, this rug is just gorgeous, you know.
But Martin Painan, did you see Martin Painin? She goes, I do see, Erica, I do. It's real pretty.

Speaker 1 And she's like, wow, mama.

Speaker 1 So I'm just happy for you to see the house, you know, because, oh, gosh, how how some people would look at redecoration some people would be but to me it's a symbol a symbol of stunnover

Speaker 2 It really is for people who have nothing else going on in their lives. And it's interesting how all this has come to fruition, you know, emphasis on the fruit part of fruition.

Speaker 2 I mean, not Martin Lawrence Billard, am I right? So, you know, the whole thing with Tom. I really am proud of you because I know what you've been through.

Speaker 2 And there were days when I was scared to death you'd move back in with me. And I'm so glad you stayed out here.

Speaker 1 The way you clanged, the way you clinged to those diamond earrings, Erica. I've never been prouder.
And Erica's like, I tried not to think about how dark things were.

Speaker 1 My mother had every right to be afraid for me. And then we see the long montage that is now reframed as Erica has been the biggest victim in the world.
And we come back and it's like, it's just easy.

Speaker 1 It's easy to get driven down into a dark hole. I was ordering Taco Bell from DoorDash.

Speaker 1 And now now we're gonna be bing bong mom could you get that it's a taco bell from door dash but I'm doing it happy and all

Speaker 2 I'm basically an Oscar winner now now that my music was played in the background of a strip scene and anora at some point you just got to listen real carefully for it I want an Oscar mom

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 we see more flashbacks of her, you know, going through it. And she goes, I'm proud of myself for not succumbing because that was a real option.
You know, I think of Tom less and less.

Speaker 2 I used to think of him every day. And then it used to be a day or two when I don't think about him.
And it's been nice. But every now and then, that Roomba comes into the living room to clean things.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, hey, Tom. And I'm like, oh, God, it's not Tom.
Anyway,

Speaker 2 I know he's been coming up for trial in a couple of weeks, but that's going to suck. I'm not going to look.
I don't know. I only want to know what I have to know.

Speaker 1 So then we see a headline. It's, prosecutors say Tom Tirardi spent $25 million of clients' money on Erica Jane's entertainment career.
As Tom's criminal date is revealed, trial date is revealed.

Speaker 1 She's like, oh, it's just not healthy to be reminded of the past. Now I'm only looking for new poor people to rip off.

Speaker 1 So she's like, yeah, I'm done with past trauma. I'm done with it.
Every time someone reminds me of Tom's trial, it's like cutting open a healing wound and I say,

Speaker 1 something festering? It smells like Tom in here. And then I think of Tom all over again, Bubble.

Speaker 2 The point is, I'm trying not to think about Tom. Okay, Erica, so any further thoughts about Tom? Oh, we just did it again to me.

Speaker 2 Serena is like, well,

Speaker 1 I'm not saying I've got so many horizontal stripes in my house now because that's what Tom's going to be wearing for the rest of his short life.

Speaker 2 Well, Erica, you have a lot to be proud of. I mean, I saw you got a coffee mug that says I'm with Stupid.
That's funny. That's cool.
You're doing exciting things for yourself, Erica.

Speaker 1 You know, it's drinking it straight from the pitcher anymore. For you.

Speaker 2 You got a a cabana. That's nice.

Speaker 2 So, you know, you know, sticking it out, going through what you went through and all you've achieved.

Speaker 2 I can only speak in such general, praiseworthy ways so many times before I have to kind of go back to Georgia. So, anything else you need me to say for you to help get through your singing?

Speaker 1 I feel like I'm in a chapter, a chapter that wasn't written missing, a chapter the one written yet.

Speaker 1 It's been missing from the book, but here we are, chapter one: Erica and her somewhat homely mother sitting in the cabana, enjoying the fruits of Erica's labor.

Speaker 1 Mother has done nothing today, but Erica has done everything. Mama is proud and silent.
Well, Erica. Mama is silent.

Speaker 2 I told you, I'm in a new chapter, okay? You know, I'm staring at the blank page before you. I'm opening up a dirty window.
I'm letting the sun illuminate the words that you could not find.

Speaker 1 Is that from the hills? Umbrella, Ella, Ella, Ella, Ella, Ella, Ella.

Speaker 2 Oh, all the hills. Don't remind me about Tom.
He drove down it.

Speaker 1 crashed his car.

Speaker 1 I've got projects. I've got dates.
I've got stripes in my wall. I've got shows in London.
I can do everything. It's kind of open-ended.
I got a new life to write now.

Speaker 1 Erica?

Speaker 2 Erica, why did you just spill that champagne on me? Feel the rain on your skin. No one else can feel it for you.
Only you can let it in. Erica, I'm getting concerned about you now.

Speaker 1 Honey, I'm glad you're going to be writing a new chapter. But could you try using less rhymes with pussy? That would be great.

Speaker 1 With my experience

Speaker 1 to some of my friends this time.

Speaker 2 Mother, I've got big news. I'm dating Brodie Jenna.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Okay.

Speaker 2 I think you're taking this too far.

Speaker 1 Well, I'm proud of you. You know, when you called and told me, mom, I have a Porsche.
I mean, now, that's pride right there. I mean, I just knew you were ready to soar to the top of the world.

Speaker 1 And you're paying a lot of money in leases. I hope you've got a long contract with this show.

Speaker 2 You know, I have to say, honey, when you bought that Porsche, I thought my daughter's never going to be able to pilfer away her money again. But guess what? You did.
I'm so proud of you.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So then we go to Porsche Villa

Speaker 1 or no, Porta Villa. We went there, right?

Speaker 1 We did.

Speaker 2 We did go there.

Speaker 1 We're very fancy. Band and I.
We're very,

Speaker 2 yeah, we went there and

Speaker 2 it was very okay food. So, um, Dorit is like, she orders her cocktail, you know,

Speaker 2 the Belvedere with Cleb Soda with three lemons squeezed in really well. Thank you, Louise.
He's like, my name's not Louise. And

Speaker 2 also,

Speaker 2 what do I do with the carcasses? You have to figure that out yourself because I'm not going to say it on camera anymore.

Speaker 1 I'm a new woman. Normally I would take carcass out, but not today.
Today's a new Dorit.

Speaker 2 You know you can't pay with those carcasses. Oh, well, in that case, leave them out.

Speaker 1 So, Garcelle comes and she's like, please don't hug me.

Speaker 1 I'm not ready for it. Oh, I know you're not feeling well.
I feel fine. Just please don't touch me.

Speaker 2 Please stay over there. Don't want your pore all over me.

Speaker 1 So listen, Carcel. Carcelle, it feels like it's been at least two months since I've been able to say, I'm good.

Speaker 1 I'm good.

Speaker 1 Do you know what? Today I say it. I'm Goots.

Speaker 1 Add an Inchberg, and I'm a star short circuit.

Speaker 1 Goots.

Speaker 2 I also invented a printing press.

Speaker 2 So, um, gee, hell hath frozen over. I would have never imagined that Garcelle and I would have been sitting together, just the two of us.
Um, and then we see flashbacks of them.

Speaker 2 I mean, technically, you guys have sat together, the two of us, but it's usually her saying, please stop saying problematic things.

Speaker 1 Um,

Speaker 1 but here we are just me and garcelle and hopefully she's brought her american express because i'm not paying for this

Speaker 2 well when doreit came to me at bose's wellness and she apologized she took accountability and you know to me that was a good start for us to try once again you know nothing more fun for me than trying to be friends with someone until they disappoint you uh about three hours later.

Speaker 1 Here we go again. It's so nice that Doret has stopped being problematic.
Garcelle, would you please hang my coat?

Speaker 1 All right, I'm going to ignore that and talk about Black Girl Missing

Speaker 1 73.

Speaker 2 All right. You're yelling at me right now.

Speaker 1 Being mamas, me you, we're mammas. And not only are we mamas, we're busy, busy mamas.

Speaker 2 Yes, yes, yes. How's life? There's so much going on that we

Speaker 2 don't know what to even say. Okay, I'll take it from here.
There's so much going on. So much to talk about.
Like Bonnie Rait says, let's give them something to...

Speaker 1 something about talk about yes that

Speaker 2 anyhow i think that's a different song no it's not i think it is it's not i think it's let's give them something to be busy mamas and papas about yes no

Speaker 1 i mean so much i mean he's picky am i right now. We're just status crew.
And I'm good. I'm happy.
I'm happy that he's happy. And you know what? If he's happy, I'm happy.
And happy is days.

Speaker 1 So if that tells you something. Garcel's like, well, it tells me a lot.
You're still a fucking idiot, and I don't know why I'm at lunch with you.

Speaker 2 Let me just say, it's like Monday, Tuesday, happy days.

Speaker 2 Wednesday, Thursday, happy days. Friday, Saturday, happy days.

Speaker 2 Sunday,

Speaker 2 happy days. Do you see what I'm trying to say, Carcell?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Well, I can relate to Dorit and what she's going through, because nobody wants to get divorced when you have kids. You know,

Speaker 1 my boys are 16, and I'm dealing with that, and I just look at her children, and I thank God neither one of you has a comp card. And it's sad.

Speaker 1 It's sad.

Speaker 2 You know, every day it's something else. I don't know if you saw the pictures yesterday.

Speaker 1 Oh, yes.

Speaker 2 PK in the bikini bottom.

Speaker 2 It was tragic. No, no, no.
I'm talking about

Speaker 2 Mauricio. I didn't even see those photos you're talking about.

Speaker 1 Oh, they were just on my phone. Carl forwarded them to me.
We're very close now.

Speaker 1 Okay, well, you know, I mean, Mauricio.

Speaker 1 I saw one of the blogs say that she took off the word wife after the picture surface and then we see headlines. Carl removes wife.
from her Instagram.

Speaker 1 There are things going on in the world. There are things that are actually happening in this world.
Please stop covering who takes what off their Instagram bios. Just stop it.

Speaker 2 I don't know if I follow. So Coyle took wife off of her Instagram.
So she just calls herself a cast member of the Real Houses at Beverly Hills.

Speaker 2 No, not from that part. The other part.

Speaker 1 What other part is there?

Speaker 2 Where she says that she's a wife.

Speaker 1 Who?

Speaker 2 To whom? Okay, I'm not doing this anymore.

Speaker 1 Well, and then, you know, then we've got Kyle going to to morgan's concerts on the sidelines and people are speculating is this kyle's way of getting back at mauricio uh which is so funny because it's so kyle too really well i'm moving i'm taking the name wife off and then i'm gonna stand right in morgan's concert you know like right on the sidelines you know what backstage

Speaker 2 yeah well if you don't want the rumors you don't do this and that

Speaker 2 yes you don't do this and that and you don't do the video and you don't do pick you don't do a pickup at the airport you You don't just say, let's move on.

Speaker 1 Exactly.

Speaker 2 No more this and that, like I said originally. I mean, the last thing you ever want to do is this and that.

Speaker 1 Oh, these people are so crazy and they're so gossipy. I don't care.
If somebody wants to get a separation, but not

Speaker 1 get divorced and date other people, who cares? I don't think there's one way you have to do it. I'm

Speaker 1 approve of this separation so far.

Speaker 2 Wait, are you saying that you're pro this and that? I mean, don't do this and that.

Speaker 1 Well, it's just funny that Darit's saying that because on White Lotus, that's a big thing because the character Greg is back on there.

Speaker 1 And one of the other like criminal guys is Walton Goggins is like, so what do you do? And he's like, oh, you know, a little this and that. And Walton Goggins goes, oh, yeah, that's a good business.

Speaker 1 You know, I do a little this and that. He's like, yeah, a little this and that.
Pretty strong industry. So it's like criminals speak.

Speaker 1 And Dorit's like, I mean, you don't just go on doing this and that. Because that's kind of what Piquet does as well.
So it's like a nice tie-in with my, with my favorite shit. And that.

Speaker 2 Garcel's like, well, it's hard to think that Mauricio is not going to move on with his life when Kyle was so public. And Morgan with picking Morgan up at the airport and hanging out with her.

Speaker 2 I mean, thank you, Garcel, for saying the things that we're all saying.

Speaker 2 You know, I always forget, like, I just always forget that Garcelle is actually such a good housewife because she really does call it all out.

Speaker 2 I think it's just that, like, in the past, her personal stories have been so boring that, like, sometimes in my mind, after the season's over, I think like, yeah, Garcelle's fine.

Speaker 1 but then when you actually see the season happening you're like oh thank god for garcel like she's the only one saying these things well she's basically the voice of the audience right because she goes and reads what the audience is saying and then she brings all that up right to the show which most of them pretend none of that stuff's happening and she's like well the the show said erica that you've stolen money from poor people and what about these earrings and what about this like she'll get everything we're talking about and bring it so i like it it's like audience mess

Speaker 1 well i think that mauricia was like the writing's on the wall and unfortunately it's neon and really annoying so if she can do this i can have i can go and have my fun but i love it that they showed the clip of kyle and morgan getting that tattoo when kyle's getting a tattoo uh and she's like you need to get a k on yourself and they ask how she how they met morgan's like oh she stalked me she stalked me and carl's like oh yeah i did i did

Speaker 2 And Kyle was like getting like a tattoo of Morgan, but not of Mauricio.

Speaker 2 So Dareed is like, so does Sutton talk to her regularly? Because they're very close with the this and the that. And Garcell's like, well, I think so.
I mean, what's your beef with her anyway?

Speaker 1 Well, oh, well,

Speaker 2 gee, my beef with her? Are you joking? It feels like you have rose-tinted glasses when it comes to any kind of Sutton's behavior. It's when you think it's all acceptable.

Speaker 1 Those are copper-tinted. I don't care what anybody says.
Please get out of here, Renee. This is not your theme.

Speaker 1 Now,

Speaker 1 you don't think set never does anything wrong she goes no no

Speaker 1 no

Speaker 1 no and she's like well and i'm just a cruel raging bitch and she goes well you were

Speaker 1 at cave as pira she wasn't cruel to me she wasn't cruel to me really

Speaker 1 and then we see a flashback of that stuff of parit and all that and garcel's like well that was mean and it was really cruel

Speaker 1 but at least she's not making you wear a khaki jumpsuit jumpsuit with name them as a name tag. So you got off easy.

Speaker 2 Also, the thing is this.

Speaker 2 When Satan's cruel, she's very funny. When you're cruel, it's just mean.
So you got to be funny about it.

Speaker 2 Well, I think that seeing something in the moment would have been refreshing. Kind of like, you know, Belvedere with the carcass out.

Speaker 2 So Carcel's like, I get it. I won't change, but I get it.

Speaker 1 Truth be told. So it's like, well, truth be told, as long as Carcel is doing Saturn's bidding, never speaking up when Saturn goes below the belt.
Oh, please, you fucking victim. You are just as bad.

Speaker 1 You've been walking around calling that lady an alcoholic for years. Come on now.
No one's crying for you, Dorit.

Speaker 2 And we had to watch the Fox Force 5 at their peak, okay? You queens of defending each other. I don't want to hear it.
Yes. So Garcel's like, well...

Speaker 2 Where do we go from here? Well, unfortunately, Beverly Boulevard is one way, so we'll have to go down to Wilshire first. And then after that, you just come up, Cannon.
No, no, no.

Speaker 2 I mean, where do we as friends go from here? Um, well, I'll be going to Encino. Okay, you're a very literal person, I get it.

Speaker 1 So, if Sutton gave you a Kelly, would that change things? And she goes, Absolutely, give me a purse, and it will be over and done with in a second. She'd be my best friend, I'd be calling her.

Speaker 1 Is she going to give me a Kelly, or are you just

Speaker 2 what about Kelly Benson?

Speaker 2 Don't know what that is, but I'll take it.

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Speaker 1 So now we go to the Godfrey Hotel, which I'm surprised this is where they're having their...

Speaker 2 I know this is the second time this season they've gone here, actually.

Speaker 2 So this is where Sutton's fashion show is going to be, and they're setting it up. And,

Speaker 2 you know, there's going to be a DJ and everything. They're doing it on the rooftop.
And Jennifer Tilley shows up. Hello.
Hi, Sutton. How are you? Hello.
Hello. Can we get a bellhop around here?

Speaker 2 We've got an Oscar nominee. Can we get up to there?

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 they go up to the there's Kent the bellhop comes over and Jennifer Tilley's like, oh, Kent the bellhop, the most glamorous bellhop I've ever seen.

Speaker 1 Because he's got this big long hair and he's like, Yes, that's me. Kent.
Like, Kent, condition. Condition, Kent.
Okay. You need to condition.

Speaker 1 So they're

Speaker 1 oohing and awing over him. And Avi's like getting all the clothes out.
And Sutton's like, don't go so fast, Avi, don't go so fast. He's like, everyone's trying to micromanage me right now.

Speaker 1 It's a fashion show. They're like, whoa, what's fashion? Oh, my God.
This is the fashion show for Sutton's line. Can we all calm down?

Speaker 1 You've got a few like pleather placemats that you're using as skirts and like some old like golf boy

Speaker 1 golf ball boy

Speaker 1 clothes. Come on.
Calm down.

Speaker 2 Listen. Press is going to be there.
WWD is coming, which I know you think is Women's Wear Daily. It actually stands for World Wrestling Daily.

Speaker 2 They're coming. Vogue is coming as an En Vogue, their former manager.
He's coming.

Speaker 2 Celebrities, non-celebrities, mainly non-celebrities buyers um people from arkansas who are staying at the godfrey have a complimentary ticket to the rooftop they'll be there i just want it to look good so that the business looks good yeah so they're you know getting set up and she's like i think we need practice with the models like oh god so

Speaker 1 obviously just sit there and the models have to walk around this pool that's kind of their runway or whatever and so obviously is just way too in it he's like oh my god drum roll, lights, clapping, music, and go.

Speaker 1 We are ready. I want more thin people dangerously close to a body of water.

Speaker 1 Jeans.

Speaker 2 This, the pool had me scared. It was also very reminiscent of Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead.
So

Speaker 2 Avi is like yelling and Kent, the bellhop slash model manager, is getting everyone ready. And they're coaching all the models going around.

Speaker 2 So then Jennifer Chilley comes out and she's she's like, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello.

Speaker 2 And we see Jade walking. And then Jennifer, I love Jennifer.
They're giving Jennifer tips on how to

Speaker 2 walk it, you know, everything. And she goes, okay, so Satin calls me up and asks if we'll walk in her show.
And I was like, sure, it'll be so much fun, you know.

Speaker 2 But like,

Speaker 2 I don't think Satin realizes that I'm a celebrity and I've actually walked in fashion shows. And they slot you in the last minute.
And they do all the rehearsals and lighting without you.

Speaker 2 And then you show up 15 minutes before the curtain and you go, okay, where do I stand?

Speaker 1 So she's doing her walk. She's like, Sasha.

Speaker 1 Oh, what a great show. Best show I've ever seen.
Hashtag sustainable. Hashtag Sutton.

Speaker 2 She is crying when she goes, Sasha.

Speaker 2 But I also love, like, Jennifer Chilly is so bubbly and lovely, and she's also so rich. But I love when she's like,

Speaker 2 I'm a celebrity. I don't normally show up this early for a fashion show, but I'll do it for you, Sutton.
But I love that she like asserted her celebrity dumb. That was just so great.

Speaker 1 And they go, so what is sustainable fashion? She goes, sustainable fashion.

Speaker 1 I don't really know what that is, to be honest. I don't know.
I don't really know. But we're doing it today.

Speaker 2 As a celebrity, I'm not usually tasked with understanding what's going on. So whatever.

Speaker 1 So Sutton's like, well, a few of you forgot to stop here at this part and then keep on but okay you're gonna do great you're gonna do great you're gonna do great

Speaker 1 uh so then we get the party everyone's getting clammed up to go to the party and garcel's so nervous because jade's walking for the first time oh to be the parent of a model it's like my child at 16 years old walking for the first time

Speaker 1 You just, it's like you get so much more in looks, but you just expect so so much less, you know, as the parent of a model.

Speaker 1 I hope that he walks.

Speaker 2 So then someone named Wa says, are you going to cry?

Speaker 1 No, no.

Speaker 2 Don't make me, don't make me, don't make me cry. No.
Then meanwhile, Eric and Renee are getting ready and Erica's like, well, my mother taught me to walk in pumps.

Speaker 2 I mean, really big stacks and stuff like that. And today we put her in pumps and she wobbly wobbles, fucking mother, putting me through all this stuff that she can't even do herself.

Speaker 1 So then we go to Bose, and she's like, well, I don't want to look better than the bride at the wedding, but it's going to happen. Do me up, boys.

Speaker 1 Lemon rasp vanilla.

Speaker 2 And then Sutton and Porter are getting their glam done and Sutton's like, I'm a little nervous that I left. I mean, we should have done this at the hotel.
I mean, let me FaceTime beat me before.

Speaker 2 So, by the way, I am a little surprised she is not getting glam downstairs at the hotel. Hello, Godfrey, throw her a sweet.
She's throwing an event upstairs and putting you on TV.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's not close either to where she is.

Speaker 2 No, it's very far. I'm surprised that she's doing it all the way over there.
So

Speaker 2 they FaceTime Reba

Speaker 2 and Reba's like, oh,

Speaker 2 so terrible about, terrible about those planes, right? God, it's almost like some malicious code got into the system.

Speaker 1 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Speaker 1 And then we find out my mother spent the whole day at the airport, 13 hours, trying to get here to tell me she's proud of me. And she never got back.

Speaker 1 But the fact that she stayed in the airport for 30, you know, she didn't even stay in labor for 13 hours. You know, I didn't come out.

Speaker 1 She finally just had him just give her some drugs until she fell asleep and then had him take a basketball and push down on her stomach until I popped out. You know, my head, I had to wear a helmet.

Speaker 1 I had to wear a helmet for a while. She's not a patient woman, but she stayed in that airport.
for 13 hours. 13 hours.

Speaker 2 And I FaceTimed her and I said, mother, that airport sure looks like your kitchen. She said, no, I'm actually in the Obam Pen.
And there's a very common style in the South.

Speaker 2 And I said, I didn't realize that because I'm pretty sure you're in the kitchen. And she said, no, I am definitely at the airport and I've been here for 13 hours.

Speaker 2 I said, fine, I will take your word for it. But I would also would like to see that receipt from Obam Pan.
And she said, guess what? I forgot to get the receipt.

Speaker 2 So I just have a word, but she was there for 13 hours. I'm pretty sure.

Speaker 1 If it makes you feel better, I was sitting at the airport bar and there were a group of people. It looked like they were wearing dish rags.
So I clapped and I I said, Good job, honey.

Speaker 2 So, um, Reba's like, well, she's like, I was excited to come. And she goes, Well, I think you would have enjoyed it.
Well, I'm not sure I would have enjoyed it.

Speaker 2 Probably would have had the worst time of my life with all those Hollywood liberals, but I would have enjoyed your success, assuming it did become a success, which we know it won't be, because let's be honest, it's a fashion show for a boutique, it's not even a fashion label.

Speaker 2 Anyway, I am so proud of you on paper.

Speaker 1 Just Just have them edit that in a few times. Okay.
Can you please leave me alone now? All right. This plantation doesn't plant itself.
Right.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 Sutton's like, well, I just wanted my mother here to tell me that she's proud of me, basically. I mean, I did this whole thing just so people would say, I'm proud of you.
And she did it.

Speaker 1 So I guess, you know, I can stay home now. Just kidding.

Speaker 1 Someone needs to wear that name of tracksuit. So then we go to

Speaker 1 Ariba and she's like, what are you wearing tonight? And she goes, I'm wearing a very risque outfit, mother. It's It's pretty backless.
And she's like, As long as it's not frontless. Good lord.

Speaker 1 I like that.

Speaker 2 So now let's go back over to the Godfrey. So everyone's getting into makeup.
Sutton shows up, and Trixie's singing. She's like, Dripping diamonds and gold, living like a queen.
Every day is a party.

Speaker 2 Every night is a dream. Every moment is a movie, just like a scene.
My life is glamorous. That's right, glamorous.
Doesn't rhyme with scene or dream or queen, but glamorous.

Speaker 2 Glamorous.

Speaker 1 So it's arrivals, and people are like, hey, Kyle, anything to say about taking the word wife off your Instagram sticker? I'm not talking to press.

Speaker 1 Please. Kyle.

Speaker 2 I won't. I won't do it.
I won't talk to the press. I won't do it.
No, no, no.

Speaker 2 Not at this difficult time for my family. I won't talk to the press.

Speaker 2 I just don't want to be asked a million questions. I mean, it was bad enough after I did the press junk and for Halloween, you know, back, back and batter than ever.

Speaker 2 But like now, now doing even these questions is just too much for a working actress.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so yeah, you're very famous. So then

Speaker 1 everybody's arriving and Jennifer Tilley is, you know, saying, telling everybody they look amazing. She's like, Satan did a great job putting this party together.
There's a huge crowd.

Speaker 1 There's so much fashion press, like major press, you know, and there's really quite a buzz in here.

Speaker 1 It's just so exciting. i'm just happy i'm walking in the show because i really like people giving me attention

Speaker 2 oh she's so great so then kathy arrives and

Speaker 2 and um they're gonna get drinks and everything and darit gets her belvedere club soda three lemons again does not request the carcass be out so this is really a new a new page for darit yeah she's like well i'm curious if i will get an apology with this invite to the fashion show or if I'm just here to fill a seat.

Speaker 2 And if I do fill a seat, will I get paid? So then

Speaker 1 or the bus stop? Which would you prefer?

Speaker 2 Sheena's there.

Speaker 1 Hi. Hi, Kyle.
How are you?

Speaker 2 And she's talking to people and everything. And then

Speaker 2 Kyle then leaves Sheena to go talk to Erica's mom. Poor Sheena.

Speaker 2 It's like, hi, I'm sorry. I got to talk to a different person who's not even a cast member of the show.
Sorry.

Speaker 1 Okay. And Kyle's carrying a big mug of beer that they're all making fun of her about.
And then Sutton comes to Garcel and Bose, and

Speaker 1 Sutton's like, what's been going on? My head has been like in the sand or on my laptop. And Bose is like, do you need a breathing exercise? She goes,

Speaker 1 well, after this is over, you can congratulate me. But now, just pray for me.
Just pray. She's like, all right, girl, I'm fine.
I'll just pray.

Speaker 2 Well, I think that for Sutton, there's a void and validation from her family, from her mother, validation from Christian, who thought she was just going to wither away without him.

Speaker 2 This is all to say, look what I can do. I'm going to prove you wrong.
I can have a fashion show on top of a hotel. And I think she'll always have that need.

Speaker 2 So what I'm trying to say is, this is a very expensive way to not deal with her issues.

Speaker 1 It's a very expensive way to get people to say, I'm proud of you. So, whatever.
If you've got the money, go for it, you know?

Speaker 1 So then Dorit and Kyle are catching up and they're talking about Mauricio. She's like, all right, I'm better today, you know.

Speaker 1 Like I know TMC reported that like I went to a concert to like make Mauricio jealous, but like, really, like, that's how they think I made him jealous? Really standing watching a concert? I mean,

Speaker 1 come on. And then we see the tabloid photos of Kyle doing just that.

Speaker 1 And showing love, Kyle Richards spotted supporting Morgan Wade at her show.

Speaker 1 And she's like, well, if I'm going to make him jealous, it's going to be a lot more than in those photos. Trust me.
I'm getting somebody's name tattooed on me

Speaker 1 where your your arm is starting to look like a sign-in sheet right

Speaker 2 well it was like a very weird thing to see those photos and it was like very strange but then mo did text an apology oh but you know you can have a little bit more discretion he's like yeah but like have more discretion like be like smarter than that like i do feel like that the person he was with like it was like a little weird that the paparazzi happened to be there and it looked like a little strange like the leg like this like what a fucking bitch like it's all her fault you know what i'm saying?

Speaker 2 Like, I don't think that he knew, but I'm like, not so sure about the other person.

Speaker 1 Oh, God.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 yeah. So, she's saying, listen, I mean, I don't know what the situation is with those photos, but I mean, it seems like suspect.
Okay. Like, I mean, he's not exactly Brad Pratt.

Speaker 1 No, I mean,

Speaker 2 yeah.

Speaker 2 So, um,

Speaker 2 uh, Kyle's like, will any of them learn their lesson?

Speaker 2 So then Kathy's like, guys, hello, everyone.

Speaker 2 I think I may have broken my knee.

Speaker 1 They're like, what? Just now?

Speaker 2 What happened? Yeah, there were these little steps, and I had on a sandal and I went flying and I hit my hand. It's like, you know, your hand's not your knee, but that's okay.

Speaker 1 I hit my hand and somehow now I can't bend my knee. Oh, it really hurt getting into the car.
You know, cars are very small now. I've bruised my head.
That was the mailbox, Kathy. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 They're the horde.

Speaker 1 The what? She's the horde of wars.

Speaker 2 It's like, horserves.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. The hors d'oeuvres.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry. I love Kathy Hilton.
She's hilarious. How does she not know how to say hors d'oeuvres?

Speaker 1 I think she does. I think it's one of those things you say, you know, like.

Speaker 2 Like a joke, like a jokey version of it.

Speaker 2 I'll accept that. It's like when you say Target.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 So everyone takes their seats. It's like this guy, Nick, is like, everyone plays Take Your See its please.

Speaker 2 And Kathy is like, well, I haven't mentioned it, but Darit could do the introduction because she's so into fashion and she can do all the narrating. So maybe she could, you know, that's a good idea.

Speaker 2 Let's have Doreet narrate this fashion show. I'm going to go tell someone.

Speaker 1 If you're going to say Dorit should introduce everybody, Sutton's going to kill you. It's her fashion show, Kathy.
She's like, I know. You know, that's why we should all help her.

Speaker 1 So I'll be right back.

Speaker 1 So backstage, Sutton's just freaking out back there. And she's like hiding behind a plant to like chug a drink.
She's like,

Speaker 2 She's chugging the plant, it's getting really bad. She's like, I'm gonna fuck this up.
I'm gonna fuck this up. And Ken's like, No, you're not.

Speaker 2 I am feeling petrified, scared, nervous, wildly stick to my stomach. Must be what my mother felt like every time she talked to me on the phone.

Speaker 2 So, um,

Speaker 2 then Kathy, so Kathy walks, she doesn't, when she goes backstage, she walks up the runway and through the entrance where the models come out.

Speaker 1 Like, what is she doing? I was like, oh my God, Kathy, I haven't been this embarrassed since Mauricio took a picture with some slut in an airport.

Speaker 1 So she's like,

Speaker 1 Sutton is me, Kathy Hilton. Okay, now listen, Sutton, did you need to read? Because Tariq would be happy to introduce the people and she can do all of the narrating.
She's like, we are not narrating.

Speaker 1 This is not. It's a real fashion show, Kathy.
She's like, oh, I know. That's why you need narration.

Speaker 2 And by the way, when Kathy comes backstage, there's like a cloud of smoke and fog. It's like such, it's so bizarre.
So Sutton's like, fashion shows don't get MC'd.

Speaker 2 This is not 1955, nor is it the Brownstone in New Jersey. Okay.
This is the red dress. This is not red dress in quarter on.
No, this is the person. And the person that you want to do it is Dorit.

Speaker 2 Obviously, you're deranged.

Speaker 1 So they send her out. And they're just like, okay, we're ready.
Let's go. So the music starts.

Speaker 1 Kathy just walks out from where she came, which is down the run.

Speaker 1 And she's limping.

Speaker 2 She's like, oh, everyone's like, oh my God. The music's playing.

Speaker 2 So then she's saying, hello, hello. And then she sees Erica's mother.
And so she goes up to her and she's like, hi, how do you do? Nice to meet you. Good to see you.
How are you? Very, hello there.

Speaker 1 She's shaking. Why aren't she shaking British?

Speaker 1 Good to see you.

Speaker 2 So then the model comes down the runway and is like smiling and just literally shoves Kathy out of the way.

Speaker 1 She's like, bitch. I was cracking up during this whole thing.
So finally she goes to sit down and throw Kathy, Kathy, oh my God.

Speaker 1 Oh, here's Kathy Hilton Poe and Falcos. Are we shocked? No.

Speaker 2 So Bo, by the way, Erica, like, stop shitting on a very funny scene. So Bose is like, this is Kathy crashing the catwalk and I have never seen it not in all all of my experience.

Speaker 2 So Kathy takes her seat and everything. And now we have a whole fashion show.
The models go around. Jade comes around.
Jennifer Tilly is going around, et cetera.

Speaker 2 And Kyle's like, this looks absolutely beautiful, which I expected no less from Sutton. I feel like this is looking very professional.
No questions, please. No questions.
Not right now.

Speaker 2 No, no, I can't have questions. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So we see these clothes. I don't really get it.
You know, they're pretty. Most of them are pretty plain.
It's like, here's what you wear to work at the bank.

Speaker 1 And, you know, then here's a pleather skirt. It's like, I didn't really understand.
And then she really did send a guy down in khaki shorts and like a cotton polo shirt with sneakers.

Speaker 1 That's the guy I'm calling the golf ball boy. I didn't really understand a lot of this stuff.
It wasn't hideous, but I didn't, I don't know.

Speaker 1 Like you can bury it and it'll, it'll just like turn into dirt. I mean,

Speaker 2 yeah, I just,

Speaker 2 I just, I just didn't even bother. I I was like,

Speaker 2 if it's a fashion show for a boutique, I'm just not going to pay attention to the fashion because it's just like,

Speaker 2 like, here's what's at my store.

Speaker 2 So, um, uh,

Speaker 2 so Erica's like, well, I don't think Sutton is destined to win a CFDA new designer. I don't think she's going to win a

Speaker 2 FDA-approved label. I don't think she's going to win really anything with any letters, but I plot her in her new line, I guess.

Speaker 1 And Doreen, they say, so Doreen, are you impressed? And she's like,

Speaker 1 hold on, I've just received the facts.

Speaker 1 She's not into it.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 then Jade comes down. They all applaud.
You know, my first fashion show in New York City was for Calvin Klein. And I'm not competing with my son, but Calvin Klein.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't compete with my son because I've already won. So, God, I miss Calvin.

Speaker 2 I remember being scared out of my mind. So, to see Jade walk out and

Speaker 2 not realizing where he even is. I appreciate that.

Speaker 1 So, Jennifer Tilly comes out in like a sweater dress thing, and she's just like, it's me, Jennifer Tilly. I've been to the Oscars.

Speaker 1 And so she does her

Speaker 2 charmed, charmed.

Speaker 1 Charmed, charmed. So she does her strut down the runway.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 Kyle's like, oh, my God, it's like so important to Sutton. Like, I hope that somebody's proud of her.
Like, really anyone, you know, that's really all she needs.

Speaker 1 So Sutton gives a speech and she's like, guys,

Speaker 1 if you're not cringing enough already, I'd like to give a speech. My 22-year-old daughter's here.
I hope she's proud of me.

Speaker 1 Are you proud of me? Are you proud? Say it louder. God damn it.
You want your allowance this month. You were taken out of that trust.
She's proud of me. She nodded.

Speaker 1 My mama wanted to be here, but she's not here. So that's something.
I'm not going to say that she missed her flight or something. I'm just going to make it sound like she ditched my show.

Speaker 1 So y'all will still hate her. But she's

Speaker 1 proud of me. And, you know, I want y'all to tip your waiters.
And I just want to say, waiters, I hope you're proud of me. Okay.
I hope all of you are proud of me.

Speaker 2 And, Porter, I just want to say thank you for being the greatest gift a mother could have, which is a daughter who's named after an employee. Okay, Porter, get over here.

Speaker 2 I'm going to give you some boxes to bring downstairs.

Speaker 1 Also, a steak. So take this stuff to mama's car.
Okay.

Speaker 2 So

Speaker 2 now it's after the show. They're backstage and Garcelle is like hugging Jade and she's so proud and she's like, I am so proud of you.
Who taught you how to walk like that? YouTube.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 Is that also where you're learning everything?

Speaker 2 Yeah. Oh dear.
This must have a proud moment than I thought.

Speaker 1 So they're telling,

Speaker 1 Kyle's telling Sutton, you know, she did a great job and they're talking about how great Jade was. And Sutton's like, wow, to have my friends, this group of friends congratulate me.

Speaker 1 And they're actually proud, proud. Oh, for Christ's sake, lady, Jesus.
So they're like, wow, you did great. You bought all those clothes and had people wear them.
Good for you.

Speaker 1 And Kathy's like, well, you showed us is that you could have a sustainable line, but also be beautiful. It's like if I saw a recycling trash can in a feather boa, I'd say, you know what?

Speaker 1 They're making an effort. And that's how I felt today.
So good for you.

Speaker 2 Well, you know what? They have all inspired me in so many ways. They will never know.
I'm truly grateful to call them all my friends. Even Poorie, who inspired me to never, ever talk to her again.

Speaker 1 And Garcelle is like, I am so

Speaker 1 proud. Just say you're proud of me.
I'm so proud of you. Oh, thank God.
It was worth it. It was worth it.

Speaker 2 Now, as we draw this episode to a close, Sutton, I want you to think about how all of us stood here and said how proud we are of you.

Speaker 2 And you had an an entire group of people here saying how proud they are of you. And notice how that will never, ever fill in the void.

Speaker 1 Okay, have a great night.

Speaker 1 And that brings us to the end of Real Housewives of Beaverly Healings, everybody. Thank you so much for joining us.
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Speaker 3 Picture this. You're standing on the beach when you notice something strange.
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Speaker 3 On the day after Christmas in 2004, a 9.1 magnitude earthquake hit off the coast of Indonesia, triggering a devastating tsunami. It struck Thailand without warning.

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