#2745 Southern Charm S10E12 Garsh Expectations on Shudder Island

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happens hello and welcome to watch what crapper and it's a podcast for all the crap we'd love to talk about on ye old bribes happy friday everybody i'm ronnie and that is the gorgeous thin and well craft ben mantelker hello ben hi ronnie how's it going good how you doing over there doing great thanks doing great just you know friday happy to be a friday has any beauty queen texted you back today gosh gosh i've been waiting've been waiting. Oh, gosh, maybe that's what I'm just a gosh waiting in a store.
Everybody, it is Southern Charm Day. Welcome.
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Fwee! So what's going on with you, Ben? What's new in your life since yesterday? Well, you know, just been exciting times over here. Watched some Southern Charm, watched some Traitors, watched The Substance, really watched a lot of things in the past 24 hours.
And they were all very visceral. So, you know, that's basically what's new with me.
What's new with you? Yeah, me too. It's been a visceral world over here, too.
I'm still reading Lonesome Dove. That is nothing but pure pain and gore and disgust.
I don't know how that's one of the most romantic books of all time, but I'm on the fourth book. I'm vowing to finish this book, even though I'm disgusted.
And I watched The Traders UK, and that was really good. Loved it.
And I ordered a laser thing online that gets rid of hair. So I've been waiting by the door, waiting for my laser thing to show up so I can start de-hairing myself.
I'm going to be smooth like a fucking seal next time you see me. Wow.
Are you going to apply it? Where are you going to apply it? Everywhere. I want no hair everywhere.
I want to look like a basic Wii character when I'm done. Wow.
Okay. Well, that's going to be exciting.
It'll be a smooth experience for you. Yeah.
Thank you. Okay.
So that's my big news in life. Let's get on with this recap.
Southern Charm, Season 10, Episode 12, Lost at Sea. Oh, poor Gars.
Poor little servant. All he wants is real love with somebody that he's met three times as 20 years younger and doesn't live anywhere near him.
Oh, poor guy. You know, I did mention that I just watched The Substance, which, you know, I was warned it's like a really gross movie.
And I swear, I think that, like, it was only the second grossest thing I watched last night because I don't know, watching Shep just trying to just like win back over Sienna. Like that one had me squirming way more than The Substance ever did.
Yeah. I mean, no one even likes the title of The Substance that watches this show because I feel like if you're any self-respecting woman, what you're trying to avoid from any man on the show is the substance.
OK, just stay away from them. They're gross.
They're all gross, including you, Craig, you fucking compulsive liar. But we'll get to that in a moment.
So we start with horror music playing because J.T. is arriving in Bahama.
And, you know, J.T. is kind of divaing out, which I don't really like.
I think he's too new to be pulling this diva shit of like showing up late and leaving early and throwing fits and doing all of this. But he did lead to the only interesting things about the episode.
So, you know, team JT for now. Yeah, I actually feel bad for the guy.
I agree. He should just stick it through.
Like, that's the job. And there's always going to be uncomfortable moments.
There's always going to be pylons. But I did feel bad for him.
So then Molly has your freeways can't stay standing. So accept your pylon, JT.
yeah um and when he did arrive you know last week we talked about how on this show they

they like smash all the keys on the keyboard and they did that like in a in like a song they made

it like, boom, boom, boom, boom, as he walked into Baja Mar, which I appreciated. And then now we see everyone else like arriving back at the hotel because they were all on their afternoon adventures where we last saw them.
And Madison's like, okay, everyone, no drama today today so then they're all gonna like get ready for tonight get washed etc molly has sunburn and eventually taylor goes into vanita's room and asks how the fish fry was and vanita says uh she thought they'd be frying fish but instead they were just getting fried on alcohol and she's like oh was like, oh my God, isn't it so cute?

JT just texted me asking me about his shoes.

And she's showing the pictures of JT, you know, showing himself posing in different shoes.

And it's not cute.

And why are you still even accepting texts from this person?

And why are you giddy over it?

You're making me very uncomfortable at this point, Vanita.

Okay.

I know we make fun of your dog scenes, but I like you. I'm reading for Vanita.
I feel like we've always been reading for Vanita, but you're trying me at this point. Yeah, I agree.
So, Vanita basically says that they vowed to have a night of no tomfoolery. And Taylor's like, I agree.
And Vanita says, you know, I just want everyone to get along and everyone is mad at JT. So I'm like, once we get over that hump, we could be great.
Yeah, good luck with that. So then Madison's calling Brett and Brett's also very excited.
I swear they must have some charisma meter on this show because everybody on it is just brimming. She calls her man and she's like hi how are you and he's like good good well what you doing nothing just working i miss you that's work it's hot madison he's a fucking fireman how do you think it is okay um so we are done meanwhile she's and meanwhile she's like applying chocolate syrup to her lips i was like what is happening over there she's like tell me more and like her lips are like this like dark dark black uh like syrupy stuff on them i was like how is this gonna blend together and then when we see her later her lips are just like light pink so i felt like i was set up for a story that did not pay off.
Well, now, like in modern makeup, the ladies put on many, many layers of crazy things, you know, and this is an episode that really points that out. So maybe there was like a base of lip and then another thing for the lip and then another thing.
Like when you were a kid and you would scribble with crayon on a piece of paper and then cover it all in black crayon and then scratch out pictures. They would be like multicolored pictures.
Do you know what I mean? Did you ever do that? I didn't do that, but that's interesting. Lame.
Well, it must have been my Montessori school. Just kidding.
I didn't go to Montessori school. Anyway, there's a lot of stuff.
And later we see it with Molly putting on her makeup, where she gets the really dark thing and just lines her face for the contouringing i know everyone's like getting ready for lion king yeah and then she looks fairly normal by the time she goes to dinner couldn't you just put on a little like i don't know eyeliner yeah i don't know i'm really big on eyeliner after watching the traders uk because the hostess of that show is she's basically a walking eyeliner stick that's she's an eyeliner eyeliner stick with bangs. And so that's all I ever, she is pretty much as close to a crow as a human can be.
Like she has that jet black hair with the bangs and she comes in and I love the way she scolds everyone, but she's like very supportive. But then she's schooled like during the challenges, she can't help.
She breaks character all the time and cheers them on but then at the round table she's like i want you to think about this you just sent home a faithful think about that think about it tonight when you're sleeping like okay i get it okay so now everybody goes over to dinner and craig and austin are wearing the same outfit it's a big uh episode where guys addressing each other too. And they're like wearing matching, matchy, matchy things.
Like later Craig and Shep wear short rompers, you know, and I don't know. It's all, it's all very confusing.
I'm not really sure what's happening this episode, but they go to dinner and Molly's ass decides to do more work than she has this season by sweating. so that's good someone's making an effort and uh then whitney shows up to dinner and then jt comes in and the music's like it's like every dying sound of every instrument yeah and then everyone says hi and vanita vanita's like there's a different type of joy when JT's in the room for me.
Yeah. Sure.
I mean, it just feels like we've been told these things, but I still don't fully believe them, you know? So they all get on this bus and everything. And people who like JT go on JT's bus, but people who can't stand him go on a different bus.
And Mass is like, I just want to flick him out of here. Just like a little flick.
So JT's like, well, I'm cautiously hopeful to be here. There's enough relationships in this friend group that I do care about that it's worth the awkward feeling that I have right now in my chest and my heart.
I'm like, okay just you're you're in the bahamas have fun come on my chest my heart my gut my gut i have enough i feel it in my neck my back my pussy and my crack a lot of friendships uh so shep is also moping around um in the van you know because his girl still doesn't like him and so they're like good to have you JT and Whitney's like yeah yeah I'm here too I was just chilling today Shep's like yeah this is good for you you're gonna be happy J're going to love it here. Just look how happy everybody else is.

One girl won't show up. Whitney won't

show up. Vanita showed up

a day late. Everybody else stayed in bed

all day. It's been great.
Great time.

So now they all arrive at

dinner, and

JT and Madison are on opposite ends of the table,

and then it's like Sally has to sit

next to JT, but she doesn't really want

to. So then Craig

basically, well, Sally's like,

she's like, absolutely fucking not.

Sorry. I just do not like that guy.

I mean, that's someone who I would not

be given a BJ to in the parking lot of

a great American, if you know what I'm saying.

Actually, it's pretty obvious what I'm saying. I literally just

said it.

We cut back to why she's

mad, and it's because at the tuba

party, JT confronted her about breaking up the very healthy previous relationship of Gaston by giving him a kind of blowjob in the Great American parking lot. So now, you know, orders.
Shep goes over to Sally, and he's like hey uh hey oh you know i think we

just you know we click and she doesn't want to lose that and i don't either you know i'm talking

about sienna just in case you're in case you're wondering what i'm talking about i just need

someone new that's not sick of me yet to listen to this bullshit act i'm trying to tell everybody

i'm a man a man who can feel love so craig tells jt craig has now taken sal over sally's seat

Thank you. act i'm trying to tell everybody i'm a man a man who can feel love so craig tells jt craig has now taken sal over sally's seat because she doesn't want to sit next to um uh next to uh jt so he's like i've been dealing with this all day i'm just listening and sally's like well i think you deserve better shep and i don't want to see you get hurt i'm like i don't know if Shep deserves better.
I think he deserves exactly this. Like, after all the years that we've seen Shep on TV, this is the precise thing that his actions require.
So he's like, I appreciate that. I'm a boy.
And then Taylor just rolls her eyes. So then Craig's like, someone's like, well, don't worry.
Sienna's showing up tomorrow. And Craig's like, he thinks she is, but she's not.
It's very obvious she's stringing him on now, okay? All right, Craig, you know what? You're not wrong, but you've been in a relationship for one minute. That doesn't make you a relationship expert.
Just please be quiet. Craig's getting worse and worse with every episode.
Yeah, and then Austin's like, Jesus Christ, man!

And Craig's like, his head has been scrambled the entire time trying to figure out where

they stand. Well, you know, Craig,

Craig has not one single ounce of

empathy. Ugh!

So,

well, Madison, I'm sorry to notice,

but your chest is just glistening!

And he's like, thanks,

that was the point of buying them

so food arrives it's all lovely and delicious and shep is like hey molly um not to belabor the point but remember how i was telling you about the text i sent to sienna the really romantic text that will surely win her over the one that ends with thank you for listening to my ted talk and she's like oh my god yes oh okay so what you want to talk about it so then he starts showing her the text and he's like this is what i sent her and she's actually being since she likes shep she's being supportive even though she knows this is a creepy ass terrible text she's like oh my god this is really sweet oh and that line about oh my heart sings when i'm with you oh my god you're gonna make me God, this is really sweet. Oh, and that line about, oh, my heart sings when I'm with you.
Oh, my God, you're going to make me cry. This is so sweet.
Oh, my God. And her freckled little lips.
I just, that is so cute. Oh, my God.
To garsh or not to garsh. Oh, my God.
Shep, you're like poetic. You're like poetic.
And Madison's watching. She's like, hey, ding dong.
You got Molly right there who actually likes you, okay? okay i mean why don't you shoot your shot with someone that's into you because she lives in the same town and he can't consistently cheat on her and then he'd actually have to make an effort to be in a relationship and the sienna thing is fake anyway i don't i don't know what you people aren't understanding it's really annoying that nobody on this cast really understands or they do understand and they're just too bored to call it out. Come to work, cast.
Yeah, exactly. So Shep is like, I mean, if you got that text message, would you be like over the moon, a free TED talk? And she's like, yeah.
I mean, even though you don't have any freckles on your lips, I'm a changed man. Look at me making cute jokes.
She's like, oh my God, do you need freckles? I'll put freckles on your lips oh i'm a changed man look at me making cute jokes she's like oh my god do you need freckles i'll put freckles on my lips like whatever you need what do you need me to do to stay on the show i've already dated whitney so i really don't know what else i could do sure someone had me an eyeliner pencil okay mama's got to pay the mortgage so then uh jt's asking about the boat tomorrow and shep says they're gonna go on like a boat trip it's gonna be like jamaica mon and it's gonna be a 400 foot boat and sally is saying oh good it's big enough where i don't have to they won't notice if you go missing um referring to jt and he's like would you like some uh some food salad why don't i hand the missus this plate first because as everyone knows i'm a respecter of the female and she's like oh god and um they're like wow look at that it looks like jt's making an effort to get along she's oh yeah he handed me a plate big whoop i love your hair tonight as well love that too she's like with me, JT. He's like, you're also stunning, I might add.
You know, this is where JT goes wrong because he does these things that he, like, these are like textbook chivalrous things, right? You're giving a compliment to a lady and so therefore you're getting along. But it's like, nope, that's not how you communicate with someone.
That's not how you connect with someone. You're just giving comments that are kind of creepy and make people want to be like, ugh.
So, like, he just, he doesn't seem to really understand, like, he doesn't understand how to connect with the rest of his castmates. And that's his big downfall, among many other things.
It's not that there's far for him to fall. But either way, so Craig is like.
Also, just general apologizing. Like, I don't think she needs you to hand her a plate of food and call her pretty.
OK, I think that she's used to like homely dudes handing her plates of food and calling her pretty. Like, that's probably 90 percent of her fucking life in that town.
OK, she needs you to say, sorry for slut shaming you in front of everybody, especially a new group of friends that don't even really know you yet. Sorry about that.
Like, sorry, I couldn't get laid by my dream girl. And so I turned it into a big drama about how you're being mean to her because i'm a complete fucking simp but uh you know maybe i'll try to be better you know she doesn't care about your fucking sausage links you douche yeah so craig's like i think you hurt sally's feelings some of the things you said before and jt's like well i think that I'll come to people's defense.
And sometimes when I do, you know, there's bullets are stray. And I got to work on that.
And it's like, not just, just say sorry, man. Yeah.
He's stupid. So then Craig is like, hey, hey, can everyone move down two seats to the left? And so everyone rotates because everyone thinks it's like a game or something.
And Craig is like, thanks. I just didn't want to be at the end of the table.
He's like, I want to be in the center of all the action. So I'm making everyone else move for me.
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Restrictions apply. So Sally at least is trying to earn a paycheck.
She's like, JT, don't you think it's a problem when there's like four people in here that you have to apologize to? And he's like, I'm going to have a little hot water for a while. I'm good.
I'm good. She's like, don't you feel weird about it? He's like, you know what? There's a lot to say to a lot of people, but I'd prefer that it's one-on-one and i feel this with my heart my soul my gut my ankle bones my kneecaps fill it with every bit of my opinion but how are you gonna make room for everyone you've upset because it's a lot well i'm trying to show respect to each of you by not bringing stuff up at the table i'm like that's showing disrespect because people's paychecks depend on being able to fight at a dinner table on a TV show.
So it's totally disrespectful what you're doing. Yeah, and they're like, leave him alone.
She's like, no, everything's on his term. I don't want to talk about it later.
I want to talk about it now. And he's like, okay, that's fine.
And she's like, fine, then don't talk to me. And Craig's like, but you see why it's not going to be fun to go out on a party boat if all of us have something to talk to you about like why don't you just apologize to people well i will say something here craig it bothers me greatly that you lied and you offended miss patricia like that because i didn't say that word about her yeah you did you said she was a bitch at the cup when you handed her the cane craig you're lying it was loud and clear and madison's like he would not make that shit up he would not i love when people come to craig's defense and say he would not make shit up he literally has lied for years on the show he lied about his law school what more do people want? You can say that you like Craig.

You can say you find him charming, that he's grown.

But you cannot say that he would 100%

not make something up.

He is the one most likely candidate

of everyone on the cast to make something

up, to fabricate something out of thin air.

And JT's like, hey, wouldn't?

Now you're 100% sure that

Craig's not lying. She's like, I don't think Craig

gets off on making us feel like shit. Especially his mother.
She's very, very rich. Now, the thing with JT is I believe JT.
I don't think he called her a bitch. And he didn't say the word affair and everything that we're about to get into.
I don't think he did that stuff. The problem is he did come in swinging at everybody at the beginning of the season.
He did insinuate that Madison's husband was super jealous, which he was when we found out when Madison said that he did get pissed and they did call him for clarity, but it wasn't really about an affair. So we do know that he was jealous, but still it wasn't really his business to be making that camera fodder or whatever.
So she has a right to be pissed. But the problem is he's made everybody pissed.
So there's nobody to stand up to Craig because they don't care. They know that Craig is lying.
They don't even care that Craig is lying because he's against somebody they all hate. That's you.
And you did this to yourself. Yeah.
I think JT came into this season feeling like he had a really strong freshman outing. You know, I think the audience by and large liked him, even if he was like annoying at times.
He stood up to Austin. People liked that.
And I think he came in thinking that he like understood the game now. And now he was going to make his move to really like center himself in the show.
And he overplayed his hand and he messed up right out of the gate and he was never able to come back and then he's been stuck on the outlines. People are not filming with him.
He knows it and now he's coming back, coming in and he's sort of like, now he's gonna try to play the pity card and he's just failing at it. He just completely flopped this season.
Even if he is in the right on these situations. And he was at BravoCon and this is the image that will always stick with me years later of JT, and I think this summed him up pretty well.
He's walking in, and there's like a group of people taking pictures, like a fake paparazzi or whatever, and whenever they come in, they're like, whoa! So he came into some lukewarm woos. I would say some lukewarm woos.
And then he had a water bottle and he like threw the water bottle up to catch it and look cool. But then the water bottle exploded in his face.
I think he didn't have the top on or something. So he caught it and it like squeezed all over his face.
And like he had a moment of looking embarrassed and then was just like, and just started pouring it all over himself and then raised his arms to like do double politician waves and had really sweaty armpits. And I was like poor guy you know yeah he's just kind of sad and so that's kind of the image that will always stick with me and that's pretty much every scene he's done since yeah poor guy so um so then Craig is like Shep was there he saw you call her a bitch no you're living in alternate reality craig shep back me up on this and shep and matt's like shep what are you gonna say about that shep's like well gosh well you heard it from sienna's pretty little freckled lips first that i didn't hear i didn't hear that i'm on record set by thing i did not hear that and so we have a gay person here let's have him something gay.
Cut to the gay person. And so Rodrigo's like, I'm shook.
Thanks. All right.
Someone pay the man. So Taylor's like, that's one thing I don't believe because JT is not the type of person to ever, ever demean a woman.
Well, except when he slut shames one for kind of giving a blowjob. And Vanita's like, that's why it's hard for me.
And by the way, Vanita, this is your buddy. Why don't you help him out? Vanita's honestly very quiet for someone that's her friend and everything, you know? Well, the cast doesn't talk to Vanita either, so I don't think she's really in a power power position where she would, they would listen to her either.
And I think she knows it. I think she's barely hanging on with this group, you know, like she doesn't offend anybody, but she doesn't, nobody hangs out with her either.
So I think she's, I think she feels like her position is tenuous enough. And it's already bad enough that she's kind of tied herself to this monstrosity this season.
But who knows? So she's like, yeah, this is really hurting me. And Taylor's like, well, there's one thing he would never say, and he would never say the B-word about her.
So Craig's like, did you not say something about Austin, too, and Audrey? Yeah, but he hates them, and Austin hates him, so who cares? We need to separate all of the issues and not make them one big issue. Yeah.
Craig is just trying to come for, uh, just trying to come for JT, you know? And you said shit about Madison and her husband and you made fun of like the FaceTiming thing on your vacation. He's like, I didn't say that.
I didn't make fun of everyone. It's like, okay, dude.
She goes, did you say the word affair? No. And Craig's well i stand by everything i fucking said so jt's like losing his mind because he's like he's lying about that you know and she's like do you remember that ship and ship is like gosh gosh the affair no it was gosh it was nonsensical the exact opposite of the vietnam war by ken Honestly, I didn't understand what he was saying.
So then we cut back to the golf place where JT is talking about Madison putting on his blue stripes in Jamaica, and it made Brett feel a little weird. And Vanita's like, but you didn't say the B word, right? You said the word affair.
So what's the story? And JT's like, Craig Laws, that's the story. And Madison's like, I'm starting to realize this might be a little bit blown out of proportion.
And maybe Craig said it a little too dramatic or something. So now, JT, I'm not going to embarrass you in front of all these people.
So next time I embarrass you, it'll be one-on-one on national television when I say something like, you think I would have an affair with you? I. I would love to talk.
Thank you, Madison. Thank you.
She goes, I'll give JT half an inch on this one. So Craig's like, I really thought you were going to own your shit, man, and apologize to everyone.
Watch Craig when confronted with the fact that there's no audio evidence or any evidence whatsoever from production still not apologize to JT at the reunion. Yeah, because they just showed us a clip too of Craig lying because that's not at all what JT said.
They just showed a clip of JT saying, well, I handed Miss Patricia Kane and she didn't take it. That was weird, which is not the same as saying that old woman's a bitch, you know? So yeah, Craig, I you said flame this it's like what you said flame this ha got you so he's like you know things are not going to get better with me sitting here so i'm gonna go to the bar so ryan's like oh i'm shook as well all right another gay getting his paycheck so he runs off after craig to do nothing as Ryan does on this show.
And JT's like, Jesus Christ, that's why I didn't want to get into it. And Craig's just like, this is like the Twilight Zone.
Yeah. So then, basically, Shep is trying to give JT advice.
Like, hey man, Coleman Collected gets the point across. Well, you were off the fucking rails.
Like why the, why JT? And JT's like, well, Craig gaslit shit, dude. He's like, hold on, hold on.
No, he gaslit, he gaslit him, he gaslit you, he gaslit me, this guy's out of fucking control. He's making me seem crazy.
But like, you've had so many opportunities to come in and be like, and be cool and be chill. And, and but it seems like every time you just like shit everywhere that you step it's insane right now hey but Austin if you're gonna talk like that why don't you talk that way to Craig I mean how can you only talk like that to JT but not to Craig and he's like don't you dare compare the two my brother there he is yeah, but you just sit there quiet as a church mouse with Craig.

And he's like, don't you dare compare the two.

So now Ryan and Craig are talking to the bar.

And Ryan's like, he came here tonight to call you a liar.

Yeah, well, I don't have a transcript of exactly what he said.

No, I don't.

But I know what I heard, which was bitch. So Shep's a pussy because Shep was there with me.
But Shep's so fucking messed up with this Sienna thing that he just wants everyone to get along. Which doesn't make any sense.
So then Sally... What does that have to do with anything? I guess he's saying that Shep wants everyone to get along so that way when Sienna hangs out, she's not horrified by the group.
I guess, but she's never going to hang out, so it shouldn't really matter. I had some doubts before when this first came up because I was like, well, maybe JT said in a separate conversation, Patricia's a bitch and used the word affair or something.
Maybe it was off camera, but now Craig is specifying, no, it was that day when Shep was there. And we just saw the footage of him not saying that.
So then back at the table, Sally's also mad at Shep. She's like, I'm just confused.
Like, why you've got JTs back when you've been friends with these guys forever. He's like, I just, I don't ever hold back.
I'll tell you how I feel. And Austin's the one who holds back.
Okay. And now he's going for it.
And Austin's like, that is a different animal. How dare you compare that to them? But it's true.
No, you're wrong. Well, you're not wrong.
You're not wrong. You're not wrong.
Wait, what? Austin backs down immediately. He's like, okay.
You're not wrong. I don't have to be mad anymore.
I mean, this is so double standard-ish. With Craig, Austin talks the big game until it's time to talk the big game.
But JT, he's an easy target. I stand for justice.
Thank you for listening to my TED Talk. I'm going to reuse that a few times.
So Austin's like, yeah, I still hold a grudge and you're a piece of shit. But all these other people have an issue with you, man.
Okay? Like, everyone does. So, blah, blah, blah.
So Sally's like, well, I'm making this statement right now. I will not go on the boat if JT doesn't, if JT goes on the boat.
Sally, you're doing nothing on this show, okay? Bring JT on the boat. Hit him on the boat.
What's a party without a pinata? Okay? And I guarantee the producers are going to pick JT over Sallyally because jt is in more conflict right now so enjoy your time hanging out by the pool so awesome oh you're a little weasel fuck jt so uh jt's just like well awesome basically accuses says that like you know jt doesn't care what people have to say and jt's like hot vanita way in please come on vanita and vanita's like oh i can't she's like crying so austin this is hurting me he's a shit of my job really hurting me and austin tells him he's literally a piece of shit so jt's like i'm out i'm out i'm but you're not money all worth my time and so he leaves and then um jt's like for you to call me a piece of shit after how you handled your shit last year. He's like, I'll go deflect to someone else.
I don't care. How dare you complete that too? So JT leaves, which, you know, I feel like they just need to start putting guardrails up to stop letting cast members leave at this point.
It's ridiculous with this cast. Like, no one's there.
They've got like half. They've got half a cast every time they shoot.
And two of those people are jt and the other one i'm not jt rodrigo and the other one you don't do anything ryan what are you guys doing yeah so shep goes over to the bar uh he like startles craig and craig's like i've never done anything with ill intent i'm like a little disappointed in you man you were there and shep is, no. Gosh, we are in a good place.
I'm a good little boy. And I just don't, I don't want to interfere with that.
No, I'm not upset with you. I just wish you would have been like, JT, you were wrong that day.
He's like, but no, there's no reason to be upset. I know you're not upset.
And Ryan's like, let him dig his own grave. That was a good one, guys, right?

Guys? So then Vanita's crying. So do you think Craig actually believes his lies? Or what is Craig doing? I think Craig believes it.
I think Craig believes it because I think Craig hears things that aren't always true. I mean, he's always been someone who's played telephone.
And, you know, he believes that he heard this, but he's wrong. and the fact that he has such conviction

is

like annoying because it's like you do this all the time. You didn't hear it right.
My theory is that he knows this didn't happen. And he's just using the word bitch because he knows that that'll be an automatic block, you know, for the group anymore.
And he's using this language because they had all agreed to get JT off the show because nobody liked him. And now people are waffling and he's mad at Shet because he's not just sticking with the original bullshit.
But who knows, really? I mean, I'm honestly just theorizing because nothing's happening on this show. So now JT goes to sit in the van, which is hilarious that they're like, okay, you want to leave? Well, we're not going to drive you anywhere.
So he still has to be there. And Craig's like, oh, yeah, well, look, Madison says something like, well, anybody who's friends with J.T.
can go in there, but I ain't going in there. And Craig's like, yeah, well, J.T.'s best friend Shep is going in there.
So now we're in divided vans and Craig's calling Shep a pussy for being nice to JT.

And Taylor's like, well, JT has like a ton of shit he needs to work on.

And we all know that I would move in with those people for a good solid few years before I ever say anything.

So Craig's like, yeah, that's what we're trying to teach him.

But there's one thing that I do not think that he would would i don't think he would talk to a woman that way that's not the crux of the issue why we're even giving why you why you and shep have his back with this is nuts i don't trust people that can't apologize he didn't say sorry one time so in the other van jt's like i've never felt more like a pinata in my life that was as close to feeling like a pinata as you could possibly be it was like i was like a big thing stuffed with candy hanging from a tree and people were swinging at me what i'm trying to say is if you had a child's party it's like we get it you feel like a pinata so shep is like oh you handle yourself very well like no i'm gonna fly home tomorrow then whitney is like wasted he's like no no listen don't leave all the sensible conversation with mousin could someone get whitney some like some hot coffee or something he is wasted on this bus whitney's always wasted these days um he's like yeah like just slurring more than ever I have a sensible composition of Madison. You know, she's the most aggrieved.

Whitney... He's really.
He's like, yeah. He's like, just learning more than ever.
I mean, they have a sensible conversation with Madison. You know, she's the most aggrieved.
Whitney, you can't yell at everybody else for not showing up to the workplace when you barely show up either. You've been off all day too.
So JT's like, I'm done. I'm eviscerated.
I've got no guts left in my body. This town will realize what it once had once it no longer has me.
You shall remember my statue in the parks, but it shall never move because I have been aggrieved. All right.
And Vinita's like, are you mad at me? And he's like, let's just talk later. So basically Whitney Whitney's like let's go and gamble so everyone heads off and uh there's like funniness in the hotel you know getting smashed by elevator doors and things like that and the girls are hanging out in the girls suite drinking drinking and having fun and Vanita she gets into her pajamas and she slinks over to JT's room and she knocks on the door.
And he's like, he's like, he's like, no cameras, no cameras. And then, but she goes in anyway, without the cameras, the doors shut and then there's fireworks.
And then we go to commercial. So I was like, okay, it's the old rope-a-dope where they, she goes in and then they just have a talk about everything and they try to make it look like sexy times.
That's what I thought. Because that's what they always do.
Yeah. So then the next morning, the guy's room is just disgusting because it's guys, you know.
And one of the sinks is just running. We don't ever really.
Yeah. I was wondering what was up with that? I don't know.
Running sink. Yeah.
So then Vanita had the most giant piece of food that she was eating. I was like, wow, what is this local delicacy? I couldn't figure out what it was.
I was like, is that a corn cake? What is that? I want, it was a bagel. It was just gigantic.
I was like, they have bagels in the Bahamas. It was enormous.
It was very enormous. And they actually like, they like sort of paused, they like timed the music.
Like if the music was, you know how they always have these sort of slinky sounds on Southern Charm? Where it was, like, glink, glink, glink, glink, glink, glink, glink. And, like, on the last glink was when she finally took her bite.
She was, like, slowly bringing the bagel up to her mouth. It was, like, a glink.
I hope it was a good bagel. I really like when they get into their Peter and the Wolf mode on this show with the music and the orchestra and stuff.
because they've decided that JT is like the bassoon or whatever. Yeah.
Because everyone else is like a high, like, and then it gets to him and it's just like, every time they cut to him, they just cut to the bassoon. Oh, man the bassoon yeah so vanita um uh the producer asked her like what happened so i'm expecting her to say well we talked and i tried to convince him to stay but he was really sad no and said she goes well i literally straddled this man and said i don't act like you don't want this as bad as I do.
Oh, God. It's like, Vanita, Vanita, this is, that's actually poor form because he, like, he did say he has a girlfriend.
You shouldn't do that. Like, I know it's ultimately up to the man, but like, come on, Vanita, you shouldn't do that.
Yeah, that's not cool. And also it was like a dinner that he just got completely, you know, eviscerated at and he was all sad and left and he's he's like needs somebody to talk to and she straddles him and is like give it to me i mean geez so he's like well i think i made it pretty clear that when i removed her not once but twice off of me in my bed in the bahamas because i have a girlfriend but he's also like can you believe it a hot girl straddled me like what the hell i know um he's like you know camera yeah and she's like for him to come out and say like listen the feelings that i have the feelings that you have for me are the same and i have for you but stronger so then what is he doing to these two i can't yeah i mean he shouldn't he was no he was wrong when he was initially being flirty with her and he was wrong like that whole dinner and everything he ate the whole meal and was being flirty and then it's like by the way i have a girlfriend like so he sucks for that i'm just saying vanita like you know like don't waste your pretty don't waste your pretty on jt it's time to move on you're like a gorgeous catch.
You're probably one of the biggest catches on this show. Like you could do better than JT.
Like that sort of throwing yourself at JT when he's already in a relationship. Come on, Vinita.
Yeah, but this show is famous for you have to fuck somebody to be on this show. I mean, look at Whitney.
Like, honestly, like he's definitely the gatekeeper of that. Look how many people have had to date Whitney to get on this show or Shep or one of them you have to do it to get on this show I mean it was like last year it was Olivia that when she was pretending to date people just because she wanted to be on the show you know and I guess that's what they consider the show to be about it's kind of like below deck where they're like well somebody better try and fuck this season or we don't have a show you you know? Right.
But it's just like, it's just, it's kind of ruining the show because it's happening now with almost every couple that's on it, you know? And it's just like cringy to watch. So, but I didn't understand why she said for him to come out and just say, listen, the feelings that I have, the feelings you have for me are the same I have for you, but stronger.
The feelings you have for me. So he's saying, so he is kind of still leading her on, right? I don't know.
Well, if he says the feelings you have for me are the same I have for you, but stronger, it's like, we have feelings, but you have stronger feelings for me. That's his way of saying, I think you like me more than I like you.
Yeah. So he's like, I mean, look, you're down, you're out, you're sad, and you got a beautiful girl throwing herself at you, and you're like, no, please, I can i mean i'm just trying my best here guys wow so vanita's like yeah he was just like i can't do that i'm supposed to be in a relationship i'm supposed to be dating this girl i can't and that was my cue of like got it i'm like girl your cue was came a few episodes ago yeah so and the weirdest part is she's telling this like it's the cutest romantic story.
She's like flipping her ponytail around and like smiling in the diary room. It's weird.
I don't like it. Benita's had just a series of swings and misses this season from almost drowning to trying to land JT.
Oh, poor girl. So now Madison tells Sally that JT wants to meet up.

So Madison's like, well, I know I've gone super hard on JT for this,

but we were friends at one point.

You know, I did lower my standards at one point in my life and let him in.

So Sally's like, so you're going to call?

You're going to meet him in person?

She's like, I think he's going to come by.

So then meanwhile, Shep comes downstairs. She's like, I ain't going over there.

He better come over here.

I'm not walking over there.

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So then we go to the guy suite and Shep comes down just looking like shit and gets in bed with Craig.

And he's like, I saw your calls.

Thanks for looking out, but I spiraled last night because I just want, I'm just a person who want love. It's not because I'm still the crazy alcoholic that you refused to be friends with last year after I got kicked out of BravoCon, right? And Craig's like, well, yeah, basically we went to a casino.
Shep got kicked out of the casino and he was so drunk he couldn't stand up. And then then we went to the room and he still wasn't there and we couldn't find him.
Dun, dun, dun. Then we hit an air tag and the air tag said, this man is too depleted of life force to locate.
I'm sorry. Yeah.
Basically Craig is like, I mean, Shep is like, yeah, well, I guess I had a rough night. I guess I woke up on a chair by the beach.
I mean, I was fine. Nothing happened.
So he basically got kicked out of the casino, wound up wandering on the beach, passed out in a chair. So I guess old Shep isn't so far away, huh? So he's like, you know, two nights ago, I was completely fine, though.
And I was just like trying to process a lot. i think yesterday you know it just all hit me so you know when you guys were like leave your phone and let's have fun i think i took that too seriously so it's your fault you guys made me get wasted yeah but you know what this isn't healthy like you slept on a beach chair because of her you know like you don't want anything to do with that he's like no what? You know, it's just, Craig, you have this stance.
You're like, this is what's right. You know, sleeping in a bed, not getting kicked out of casinos.
I mean, who even are you? How do you live like that? And he's like, but like everything you're going through like is her fault. Cause like if three weeks ago you planned this trip, those feelings were the same.
Like we'd be one big happy family. No, it's not her fucking fault oh my god this fucking weirdo so she's like i'm just so in love i know nothing about her but gosh i love her she has lips lips with freckles have you talked to her today no if she comes to the boat then great well that's what it is like you get to spend another day with her another day and you get to see what it looks like at the end of the day right so meanwhile jt goes over to madison uh madison's room and he has a little red box as a as a gift and uh he's like hey can you give me another pillow sorry i got a bad back diabetes bad back i'm getting old oh hey hey so uh thanks thanks for giving me that pillow it's a nice thing you ever done for me oh don't get used to it yeah well it's the little things anyway i want to give you this this to give to whitney it's a very nice box of cigars but i got this from his patricia and whitney after craig made that bullshit up but you know you can smoke them if you want oh i'm like i'll keep them which i liked so he's like okay you can also get decide who gets to smoke them all right well thank you thank you for taking me this time because i didn't want to get it into the table but you know i didn't want to have those conversations at dinner but thank you for volunteering to talk to me just where do i start to dive in i'm sorry i brought up that FaceTime call that you actually made to Craig.
And that was a huge mistake, you know. And she doesn't deny that the phone call happened.
And he's like, it wasn't a hit job on you. And she said, well, that hurt my feelings.
And he's like, okay, wait, hurt your feelings? Because didn't you hear what I said? You heard what Craig said that I said. I mean, this was a conversation for you know now we're stuck in craig's telephone game of and it's up and i want our relationship back okay and she's like i'm just i just want this friendship to work okay i chose the best of two pairs of shoes last night and i was eviscerated eviscerated to my core so um madison's like well i'm glad that he got to got to say his piece, but we can move on.
I am done with this. He's like, well, thank you for your audience, and I hope you guys have a great day on the boat, because I shall not be there.
And she's like, you're not going to show up? No. I'm going to go back and take care of some business.
My mama sent me a rug, so I'm going to put it somewhere. Alright, well, I don't think you need to carry it out.
I part of part of being in this group is dealing with being hazed and you're gonna have to get on that boat while everyone yells at you you gotta do that he's like no i can't negotiate the truth with craig no yeah so he's gonna wuss out which kind of just destroys the whole season basically because there's like literally nothing so then uh the girls are talking about it and And they're like, what happened? She's like, nothing, really. I mean, got some big fat cigarettes to smoke, I guess.
I'm like, well, I guess he's just trying to be civil. She goes, I don't know.
I'm bored. I can only imagine how the audience feels.
And they're like, I almost feel bad for him. So now Craig, the relationship expert, gets his completely uninterested girlfriend on the phone to lecture Shep.
Yeah. Yeah.
He's like, hey. Hey, chicken.
Wait. Wow.
You guys look like you have a really sick place. Thanks.
It is sick. But I need your help talking to Shep.
So Shep is like, oh, OK. Oh, yeah.
What do you guys have to say? Well, I told Paige a little bit about last night. And Paige is just like laughing because she's just like, this man is so pathetic, all of them.
And so Shep is like, well, it's just been hard, Paige. I'm sure you can understand.
Well, the only thing I will say is, especially with long distance, if it's already shaky, it's only going to get shakier. like, if you think, if you're in long distance and you think like one person, if it's been like two years and they still haven't moved to your like bucolic little suburb in the South, then like you have to get the point and like realize it's just like never going to work out.
You know, do you understand that? If she's not breaking up with you now, she's just waiting till between seasons. So she's not haste as hard on Twitter.
So that's what you need to understand. Well, here's what he's hung up on because he's like, how could someone tell me that they loved me three weeks ago and now act like this? I don't even believe that she said she loves you.
Unless it was like in that very casual, like, yeah, sure, love, yeah, I love being with you or something that he took it wrong. Because we already saw Shep bullshitting last week where he's like, she said I was going to i was gonna miss you cut her going well i don't know if i'm gonna miss you or whatever she's yeah that's the thing shep shep has not been a good character witness either i mean i do believe him with the craig thing because we have cameras to back it up but like a shep literally made up some sort of fictional thing that sienna said i love you so i don't know what's up with that but but it's been like three weeks ago, as far as I can tell was when she went off to Africa and came back and like, didn't tell, speak to him the entire time and basically ghosted him after that entire experience.
So like, it's been pretty obvious for a while now that Sienna is not so into Shep. If anything, it seems like Sienna, after her trip to Charleston earlier in the season, that's when she started to pull away.
She was like, Oh, oh no, I don't like this at all. Yeah, this is not gonna be for me.
Yeah, he's full on pretending I'm his girlfriend without even telling me. It's a fucking weirdo.
So Paige is like, okay, listen, things change. If she's not texting you back, she's not trying to sleep with you every night.
She's not trying to hang out. She's not trying to introduce you to her family.
Now listen to this. Craig, you too.
I don't like you. Craig's like, wow, I can't believe Paige just called Miss Patricia a bitch.
He'll try it. Watch.
Next season, he'll be like, oh my god, Miss Patricia, I should have known Paige was wrong when she called you the C-word. Well, I never.
Randy's getting extra lashings for another month. So Paige is like, look, I'm going to tell you something that my mom used to tell me all through my 20s.
You're going to meet a man named Craig one day and you'll be able to do better. So ride that wave while you can and then move on from the pillow man.
Also, if people like you, you'll know't like you am i done here do i get paid for this let her let her go okay chicken out so um now uh molly is getting into a dress and ryan's hanging out with the girls and everyone's getting ready for the boat and shep they're they're heading to the boat and shep gets a message from Sienna that, surprise, surprise, surprise, surprise, surprise, surprise. Hey, you're not sure I'm going to be able to make it to the boat.
I'm running late. Sorry.
So, like, we all knew this text was going to come. And although I have to say, at this point, I am kind of feeling like, Sienna, you got to cut the cord here.
that you are kind of like we all everyone can see everyone at home everyone in this group can all see you're not you don't like this guy and we support you not liking shep but now at this point it's time to be like just just say hey i'm not interested in doing this anymore which i guess is what's yeah but she tried to have the conversation with shep and he refused until they were on camera and so now she knows what he's trying to do which is make her look like a villain and him look like some sweet innocent little boy so i think she's just trying to avoid it until he's back home and she can dump him properly you know you know it is it's like it worked even though it's completely obvious what he's doing it's worked i mean people on the internet are like fuck that girl for hurting poor chef yeah well you know i'm still on sienna's side, but I kind of feel like you should just do a proper ghosting. So don't commit to going on the boat ride that you know you're not going to go on.
Just say, I'm busy this week. I'm washing my hair.
So he's like, it would be nice to pull a real ghost where you're like, what do you mean? I'm on the boat. What do you mean you don't see me? I'm right here.
I'm your hand i've been here all this time so he's like wait well what's your eta we'll hold the boat we'll stop everything we won't go on the seas and she's like basically like no i'm i'm gonna be really i'll see you tonight i'll see you tonight i'm minimizing my shep time please go stop texting me yeah so everybody else has decided to just leave Shep because he's pathetic. Well, mostly Craig.
He's like, we're leaving. So they go to the boat instead.
And Shep is like, what a predicament. And then they're deciding that they're just going to fucking leave him because they're sick of listening to him.
And now Whitney is also not coming because, you know,

when this cast comes to work

whenever they don't want to.

And they're like, yeah, he's a vampire.

So Molly's like, I mean,

I just, I don't even get it with JT.

Like, I'm trying to be nice

and just be like,

I'm going to try and understand.

But like, he knew what he had to do

and he can't even apologize.

So whatever, he can fuck right off.

Yeah.

So Santa replies and says,

I'm going to go to the next one. understand but like he knew what he had to do and he can't even apologize so whatever he can fuck right off yeah so sienna replies and says um i don't know how late i'm gonna be why don't i just see you later at dinner so then ship tries to call her and of course she doesn't take the call like i mean i'm cring everything about this makes me cringe for shab like like oh my gosh he doesn't like you why are you now calling her on top of that? Why are you being so clingy and needy? Stop it!

So,

everyone's getting on the boat

and Craig is like, he's in his

40s. He'll make his own decisions.

All we can do is lend

our opinion of it and if he takes it,

he takes it.

And Taylor's like, yeah, at the

end of the day, you got nothing for nothing. He's not gonna,.
He's going to do what he wants to do. And I can tell you this much.
What he's going to want to do is not own his emotions. Oh, what are you talking about? He's over there like rolling around with them.
You know? Yeah. He's like trying to get anybody to believe that he has them in the first place.
So Shep just writes her back. Of course, I really wanted you to come with us.
We could have done the Titanic thing on the front of the boat, except you would have been the one to drown and die instead, because I'm rich. But still, whatever.
I guess I'll see you back at the hotel. Gorgor, gorgor, gorgor.
So he walks to the boat like as slowly as possible. And by by the way he's in a bright pink matching shorts romper yeah makes this and he just much funnier and he just is like his sad walk is so sad he's like oh gosh gosh gosh like that those hands are flapping more swinging really sadly and his head is hung down and everyone's watching him approach the boat, and everyone's like, aw, Shep, aw, look at the walk, our little walk, you know? And so he comes on board, and they're like, aw, Shep, and they're hugging him.
He's like, gosh, gosh. And Sally's like, I mean, I feel bad looking at him, because, you know, he does look look so sad but he'll get over it that's life yeah i might have suggested the first step find a parking space at great american that's right uh so um matt is like hey molly go kiss him go kiss and make him feel better so uh craig's like look i want us all that fun because's what you do when you break up.
Although I'm not sure you really broke up because you had to be together in the first place. But you know what I'm saying.
Yeah. And then there's a record scratch because Taylor's like, gross.
She turns around. She doesn't like that.
So then Austin goes to talk to Shep. And, you know, they're trying to make him happy, but it's not really working, because, you know, Shep's just so, so sad.

So then Sally checks in, then they get in the water, and Shep's like, I wanted her to come, but she's running late.

So I just texted her and said, meet me back at the hotel.

I mean, but this was her idea.

This whole trip, this whole trip was her. It just makes no sense.
Yeah. So Matt's like, oh, good God.
Could someone get him a drink? So then, so Shep is like, I'm just going to have fun. That's what I'm going to do.
I'm just going to have fun. So they get to like, they're going to go to Rose Isle.
So Shep is like, my island. No man is an island unless they have one.
So they go there and there's like, there's funny party times on the boat and everything. And then, you know, if your hand is on the pole for three seconds, the rule of the boat is you have to do a dance on the pole.
So it's all kind of like fun stuff and um they're all like yeah we need to get shep drunk because he's spiraling right now yeah so then um molly's talking to shep later and uh she's like yeah i haven't had sex in over a year it's like been nuts like i don't even know what it's like to have sex as an obese person yet and he's's like, you've been celibate. She's like, I mean, I masturbate, you know, so there's that.
So that's fun. You know, I mean, I'm not, you know, I got a vibrator.
And he's like, wow, well, I didn't want to say it. She's like, I mean, come on, I'm not a nun.
Okay. So Austin saying, well, I don't know, you know, like, I don't know what the situation is, but you know, nobody can make you get over someone except for yourself.
You know, Your friends can be like, come on, man. But until you stop feeling like, this is insane, what are you going to do? So then Vanita, Taylor, and Rodrigo were talking.
And Vanita's like, yeah, JT really hurt my feelings because he wouldn't come on the boat. And I said, do it for me.
But then he wouldn't come on the boat for me. And I was like, wow, that really hurts.
Okay, you're another one. Why don't you just date Shep? You're both pathetic at this point.
Like, stop. The man said he doesn't want you.
Stop texting him. Robert Rico's like, plot twist.
JT's with Sienna. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
I'm shook. So JT's packing up all his stuff.
And then we go

back to Vanita and

she's like, JT's my best friend so it's hard to have

everyone come at him at the table. He was like,

I'm stressed. I feel like I'm getting beat up all

the time. And I'm like, well, you gotta make it right.

Like you're allowing everyone to beat you up right now because

you're not speaking. So

JT's like, well, I'm

leaving the Bahamas because I see Mission

Impossible right now with the friend group. Oh please, you're just picking that movie because he's also short.
So then he's packing up, and it's the longest five-minute packing scene I've ever seen. Like, well, we're paying this man, so we might as well get him doing something.
Let's watch him put his stuff into packing cubes. So we watch that for a while.
And then he leaves, and he's like, see you later, NASA. And he's out.
So then back to the boat, Austin's like, hey, Sally, show them your tits. There's a boat over there.
Why is everybody telling Sally to do that all the time? Poor Sally. So then Austin's like, hey, Molly, Molly, do you think Shep's tongue would taste like sandpaper? And she's like, do I think his tongue would taste like sandpaper? Well, why don't you try that? He's like, gosh, it's been a year.
It's been a year. I'm doing her a favor.
So Molly's like, I feel like I'm at a middle school dance. And everybody's like, go dance with him.
But then I'm dancing with a tuba. Oh, flashbacks.
So then they hug and it's like's like cute and everything. I'm not buying any of that either.
I'm not buying that Molly likes Shep or that Shep's even considering this. It's kind of bad improv at this point.
So then Craig is doing some ocean euphemisms. He's like, hey, you know what I always say? Go where the tide is.
They're like, yes, well done, Craig. So Madison and Shep sit on a boat together because they're on the island.
There was like a hangout. And Shep is like, gosh, Sienna and I, we went around that point and she was like, I want you to buy me that house.
And Matt's goes, shut up. He's like, yeah, it was like a $10 million house.
And I was like, I don't know. Hey, do you feel like maybe you're not rich enough for her? And Shep goes, yeah, maybe I do.
I'm like, wait a second. What is this narrative? Like, no, she's not a gold digger.
She has TV. She sees who you are.
She talked with you. She got tuna salad spat at her face when you talked with your mouth open okay like it doesn't have anything to do with money no that's what happens when you don't give guy a guy like shep what you want he immediately starts calling you a gold digging slut that's what happens that's that's the last he changed shep for you guys but then to be fair he goes but then again who am i I'm a fucking wild son of a bitch.
Sort of a disaster zone. Yes, that's probably the stronger point then that Sienna wants someone who can afford more than a $10 million home.
Yeah, but he doesn't really believe that. He just wants some pretty girl to tell him he's worth something, you know, which Madison doesn't, which I really like at first.
At least she's like, yeah, well, you are sort of miss. am I a good idea for anybody? I mean, who wants to wake up to somebody who's got a mailbox full of their daddy's money? No one, probably.
Who wants someone handsome and set for life? No one. I've read Shakespeare.
I'm realizing that in the past, I was a wild man. But you know what though? Last night counts as the past and today is the now.
So I'm feeling a bit inadequate because a lot of girls are seeing seeking a stable life and I'm like, Mr. Toad's wild ride.
So I don't know. Isn't that right closed? No, it's not.
I recently went on it. Really? I went on it with a cold brew.

Yeah, which was a fun experience.

I took an illegal cold brew. You weren't supposed to have a cold brew.

But I was like, I told the person when I was getting out, I was like,

what do I do with this cold brew?

And he was like, just hold it low so the cameras don't see you.

So I had a cold brew.

He's like, just fucking take it. It's Mr.
Toads.

I was like, if I'm going to hell, I'm going to hell with a cold brew.

That's what happens on that ride.

You go to hell.

That's the whole point of the ride.

So Madison's like, you deserve to be loved as much as you're giving her.

So, you know, fakely.

And he's like, oh, thank you so much.

Wow.

She goes, everybody deserves to be someone that loves someone. Everybody deserves to be with someone that loves him.
Even Shep. So she's trying to be sad for him, but it's Shep, you know.
And so she's like, who ever thought I'd be sitting here talking to you off a ledge? She's like, oh, she's so angry about it. Oh, thank God we know now she's just a gold digging slut and I can move on with my life.
Yeah, we got the ball to that. And that was the episode.
So next week, it looks like Sienna's finally going to tell him, I don't want to be in a relationship with you. We never were in love.
We weren't even boyfriend-girlfriend. Stop.
Goodbye. Get out of my face.
I'm looking forward to it. Yeah, I hope they have another six episodes this season uh they're really uh making it happen all right everybody thanks so much for being here for watch what crappens um we will be back later today with a traders recap and we'll be back next week with just all sorts of stuff so check out our tour schedule over at watch what crappens.com and we'll talk to you next time love you bye bye watch what Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors.
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Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey. Have you ever wondered how a circus performer could become the most powerful woman in the Byzantine Empire? Even the Royals is a podcast from Wondery that pulls back the curtain on royal families from ancient empires to modern monarchs to show you the darker side of what it means to be royalty.
Before she ruled an empire, Theodora was a teen sensation in circus shows featuring dancing bears, burlesque performers, and blood-soaked chariot races. But when her star came crashing down, she clawed her way from rock bottom to the very top, using everything from comedy to espionage to get there.
Empress Theodora didn't just survive. She revolutionized women's rights across the Byzantine Empire, like changing laws to let women divorce men, own property, and bring abusive men to justice.
For all her work in pioneering,

she's remembered as the most powerful Byzantine empress in history.