#2736 Summer House S09E02: Broken Hearts and Middle Parts

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We'll be right back. Watch what crappens, guess what happens when there's so much that crappens?

Watch what crappens, guess what happens when there's so much that crappens?

Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.

I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me as usual is the wonderful and lovely Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie.
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So I'm good i'm floating on clouds what's going on with you over there that dreary ass song i prefer the one that goes dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun my sister said why aren't you getting up because at the at credits or whatever they play, that starts going,

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As you should. I've only seen La La Land once and it was fun.
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And today we are getting back into Summer House.

It's the much anticipated reunion of Carl and Lindsay.

Carl and the dishes that he's going to be doing the rest of the season, because that's all Carl is going to do.

Why is Carl back?

I don't know.

I guess Carl's back to watch Carl do some dishes and act like a huge victim of everybody around him. Well, not everybody.
Lindsay. And it's delicious.
It's actually really fun to watch. Carl's best season, I have to say, so far.
Really enjoying it. So Carl comes in.
At the end of last episode, he came in, freaked out with the producer. He's like, oh, my God.
What am I going to say to Lindsay?

And then went to the bathroom and hyperventilated for a while and talked himself up.

He's like, you look great, by the way.

So now he comes out all confident.

He's like, I'm Carl.

And he walks right out to the pool where everybody's having a good time and starts doing his like, oh, how's it going?

Look at all these faces.

Hello, Sierra. Hello, Paige.
see you again. Oh, no.
it you know she is like so obviously there and oh hey i just want to say hello to everyone here

does anyone know this balloon guy here can i say hi to him oh look hey pine tree good to see you again a barbecue am i missing anyone am i missing anyone at all and lindsey's just like this is classic carl you know avoidant passive aggressive pussy yeah and lindsey's like um i um don't blame him for not saying hi to me, but

like, I really don't care.

So.

And, uh, Jesus. Here he goes.
And Lindsay's just staring at him like, okay. Yeah.
Everyone's like, right, right right right so Lindsay's like I'm done with that relationship and his feelings and emotions are just like not my issue anymore so he can like lean on someone else for softness and tenderness and tighter hugs it's like yeah you go Lindsay so then Sierra's like she whispers to Jesse she's like did Carl and Lindsay even say hi to each other and he's like i don't think so hold on let me facetime my girlfriend lexi hold on hey lexi you there she's like carl i'm jesse i'm sitting right next to you all right i just want to double check uh so then kyle is asking carl you're like have you said hi lindsey yet and he's like oh no i just uh want to congratulate her on everything, but I just don't want to make her uncomfortable. It's super important.
I mean, she's like pregnant, pregnant, right? And you're like, yeah, she's pregnant, pregnant. So, Carl, of course.
By the way, nothing says making sure someone isn't uncomfortable, like singling them out and not saying hello to them. I just don't want to.
It's literally what I do with every pregnant person I see. If a pregnant person comes on the bus, I just like hide my face under a magazine.
Like they can't see me. They won't feel uncomfortable.
I don't want to feel uncomfortable. So Carl's like, she's like pregnant.
I mean, then he tells us this This is one of many woe is me things from Carl that we'll probably get all season long. I just wanna say the right thing and I wanna like deliver the right words, just like acknowledge it.
And it's just like, I think it's like the right thing to do just to say something, but I'm afraid she's gonna like bust out a bunch of shit that she's angry about. And there's like a lot of feelings and emotions.
And like we were friends before this, I was in love with her and i wanted to get married it just wasn't right so i have like a lot of like i got my armor up and even though she seemingly doesn't give a shit anymore i still think she does okay so there's a lot of bullshit right in here first of all you want to deliver the right words guess what you had like a three-hour drive to get here you could have thought of something okay second of all is lindsey you know you, you don't have to be so delicate with her. Third of all, um, I'm afraid she's going to bust out a bunch of shit.
Okay. So you're, you're afraid of scary Lindsay now.
Okay. Relax, bro.
She's pregnant. She's moved on with her life.
And then he does the whole thing like, well, I wanted to get married, but it just wasn't right. No, you were the one who broke it up.
So you don't get to pull the whole, I wanted to get married thing. And then the whole like, oh, I've got my armor up.
So, you know, she doesn't give a shit anymore, but I do. I'm still the one who's sensitive and caring.
Shut the fuck up and get out of here and go wash a dish. Can I say, I don't even have any of the anger towards Carl.
I'm just like, poor Carl. Like what's Carl even doing here? You know, he drives up.
He doesn't even have that. I mean, last year it was like, what's Carl doing here? But at least he had the Lindsay thing kind of going on.
But even then he was not really into it. So, I mean, I don't really care.
It's kind of like, I remember when I worked at Applebee's. Sorry, everybody.
Wait for it. It's an Applebee's story.
But I was like 15 and I finally left that place. And then I came back and I was like, this is going to be so special seeing everybody.
And like, I don't know, having my moment with all my friends and stuff. And it wasn't OK.
It was different. Now somebody else had to dust the pictures on the wall and the stupid license plates they used to put on the wall.
And it wasn't me. And I felt kind of sad about it for a minute.
But then guess what? I started going to Chili's instead. And my life was a lot better for it.
So my point is, Carl, go to Chili's, okay? This is no longer your Applebee's. You are a bad apple.
You have fallen off the tree and rolling down the hill. So go, go rolling.
Roll down the hill. Go away.
So the boys are going to have boys say, we're going to the union bar. It's just boys.
So we're leaving at 20 leaving at 20 all right everybody so now they have to start getting ready to go do that and stuff and west is also still moping around he's like wow he's really upset sierra really hurt his feelings guys sierra really hurt his feelings by confronting him with the stuff that he did yeah and jesse is still admiring Lexi he's like i mean she has kind of a juicy booty i'm like does she so then then like she comes in because they're in the kitchen and so they like scatter they walk back in as if like they weren't just staring at her she's like hi i'm looking for string cheese so there there's people were saying where's lexi's personality and it has arrived she's looking for string cheese cheese. And Jesse's like, do you like my outfit? She's like, no, I love your outfit.
I love it. And Paige walks in and is like, oh, look at your little terrycloth set.
You're just like a little towel boy. It's like you made an outfit of towels.
Okay, bye. So then West comes in with like a Duck Dynasty outfit.
I'm not really sure what West is going to do. I get wanting to do the whole like, I'm a guy.
I listen to Barstool. Like, that's great.
Okay. You guys do you.
I see you all over the place here in Texas. This isn't fashion.
At some point, he's kind of a caricature of those guys. I'd actually like to see one of those Duck Dynasty guys just kind of beat up West.
Yeah, they probably would. So Amanda's like, are we going hunting? No, it's like not fun pants summer.
It's fun top summer this year. Is that what's going on, Wes? He's like, do you think this is a fun top? She goes, for you, yeah.
For anyone else,

it's garbage.

For us, it's all fine, because we get to laugh at you.

So, Kyle,

you know, I love that we're acting

like the guys are all high-fashioned.

They all look like dads going to a Costco in the summer.

Okay? But every time one of them

comes out, they're like, oh my god, you look amazing!

So now, Carl's like,

oh, I'm gonna drive for Boys Day. It's for's for the boys so page comes up with a better idea she's like amanda what if we fuck around and lie down on the couch it's crazy so then uh carl's like yeah i already feel a good vibe to the boys wes is like dude if it makes you feel any better about an awkward intro with Lindsay,

I went in to give Sierra a hug

when she got here, and she fucking

stiffed my arms away.

Oh, man. And we see

flashbacks of that.

He's like, yeah, it's been a day

and it's already been like, I asked her

something this morning and she was kind

of nice, so I think it's getting better.

I wasn't sure if I should say something with Lindsay, because I i saw her in the pool and i was like should i say something but then i didn't say something and jesse's like you did the right thing bro you did the right thing that's totally what you should do to make things less awkward you know walk in have a nervous breakdown in the bathroom and then just don't say anything to the people that terrify you he's's like, yeah, yeah. I'm going to give it a little space.

A little space.

Yeah, I kind of agree not to do it in front of everyone. The second you get there, it almost feels like you're chomping at the bit to say, you know, something crazy.
Like, hey, how's it going? Congrats on the pregnancy, by the way. Because God forbid you say something like that.
So now the girls are talking about how nervous Carl was. And so she's like, oh, my.

Amanda's like, do you think you noticed the gigantic ultrasound on the mantle and she's like the weirdest thing to me is that like lindsey's pregnant so now like we're all pregnant like i have to get my shit together now wait do i have to get my taxes in order and Amanda's like, yeah, I got to call my accountant.

Maybe I should move to South Carolina.

What am I doing?

Maybe I should just submit to hell.

Yeah, and so Paige is talking about how weird it is because one girl gets pregnant,

and then it puts things in perspective with everybody else. And she's like, yeah, when Craig and I started dating, Lindsay and Carl started dating.

And then they got engaged, and they planned a wedding. They called off the wedding.
She got a new boyfriend. She got pregnant.
And I'm still dating Craig. And all that's really happened is that I got Craig to get a new haircut.
So am I behind? But to be fair, this all happened within the span of like six months. Okay.
Like the wedding, the engagement, the wedding, the breakup, that was like, that could not have been more than a calendar year. And it's also different because Lindsay's wants are very different.
Lindsay was like, I'm getting married. I'm having a baby.
This is my timeline. I want a balloon and I want a hot air balloon.
Like she had all of her stuff and Paige didn't really like that. I do think it's funny though that girls seem to have that, no, someone some one of my friends is getting married.
Should I be getting married? Should I be getting a baby? When one of my friends gets married, I know that it's time to go to the BevMo and get the bar stocked because they're going to need somewhere to come complain about their marriage. And it's it works like clockwork, you know? Yeah, I believe that.
also Lindsay and and Craig they should get together because they both

want to have the whole family thing and why not? So, um, so then the guys just talking, they're at the bar, there's broing out and everything talking about what they're drinking and stuff. And Kyle's like, well, first of all, similar to his relationship, it was less than 24 hours old with Jesse and everything.

And Wes is like, oh, yeah, that's what we're going to tell you.

Verbatim, dude, put this T-shirt on.

Jesse today goes, I can't believe we're going to go two summers in a row where we're not single together.

Like, yeah, it's crazy.

It's like in a relationship.

It's like, yeah.

I accidentally said, I don't know if she clocked it.

Oh, Jesse says, I don't know if she clocked it. But Carl, I'd like to introduce you to the love of my life, Lexi.
Like, I'm pretty sure she clocked it. Yeah, and Wes is like, I guess I'm without my bro for the rest of the summer.
So he's all sad. So he's, like, sadly singing, like, the reprise ballad version of What Would Jesse Solomon Do? do it's like what would jesse solomon do do do do do do do so then um back at the house uh the girls are still talking and gabby's like so lexi am i catching vibes from you and jesse and she's like oh my god you're I was going to say, like, tell me about your vibes.

Look, like, he's cute.

And, like, it's our second day.

So, like, we haven't dove in deep.

But, like, so far, I'm, like, so shocked.

I'm, like, the vibes are there.

Like, I'm just, like, I don't like to be touched unless it's somebody that's cute.

But, like, he touches me.

And he's, like, cute. So, like he touches me, and he's cute,

so vibes are there so he can

touch me.

That was a really long

paragraph to say

nothing, Lexi.

Say something, Lexi.

Gabby is just like, why am I the one

who has to ask these girls what's going on

in their lives? She looks so disinterested with them.

So Lexi tells some backstory. She goes, my parents have been together for 37 years.
Crazy. They got married when they were 21.
So seeing their love and how that foundation just goes on and on about her parents. Like literally no one cares that your parents are still together.
We care more if your parents were separated and one of them, you know, like got lost in the Amazon or something. So Bailey's like y'all look cute together though so i'm like your supporter for the one episode left that i'm on this show and then back at the bar jesse's like wow you guys i can't believe how excited i am about this like i feel like i'm like too young to like need someone like young and fresh to make me feel like more of a man but apparently i'm not so i feel like i've entered kind of a new area era of my life it's amazing like yeah bro yeah this is the fastest 24 hours of relationship i've ever seen in my life bro and carl's like y'all hey have you texted her yet do you want to text her he's like i don't have her number yet bro they're like oh man so he dms her to get her number and he says yeah i dm'd her i said i wish i had your number right now like oh it's gonna be awful this is good it's gonna be a rough season for jesse because this is gonna blow up yeah uh so he's like to my last night as a single man everybody they're like oh my god dude you're so insane he's like guys you know i'm kidding but also kind I mean? So now it's July 5th.
How did no one even care that it was July 4th? Come on, guys. Is it because it was on a Thursday or something? Maybe.
Maybe. That's like a huge day on Summer House, July 4th.
It's a huge deal. Huge day.
So now Lexi, Gabby, and Dan. Lexi, Gabby, and Bailey are at the table still.
And Lexi's like, wait, so Bailey, I know that you're talking to someone in the city, but you aren't sure where things are. Do you care to elaborate? She's like, yeah, I want to keep it.
Gabby's like, is he coming to the party? We don't know. Oh, so what do you mean? Why isn't he coming? I don't know.
He's like, sent some weird message. He was like, I'm sorry, I have a lot of work to do.
I mean, I met this guy and we went on a couple of dates and he's such a beautiful man. And then I went into this with no expectations, but I also don't need you to give me attitude if I'm having a good time and I'm not on the phone, okay? Like, what do you think I'm doing? I mean, I just said, let's just see how this goes.
Let's not put a label on it. Danielle's just sitting there like, I'm not Danielle, Gabby.
She's just like, how much longer do I have to talk to these people before I can contractually go to a different room? I think part of the problem in relationships today is that people are so afraid to put labels on things. Well, Bailey, I've got a label.
I've watched you for about five minutes. Here's a label.
Boring, okay? Boring. There's your label.
Sew it on and run along. So then Gabby goes to Lindsay's room and she's like, oh my God, these young girls have me like spinning in circles.
I mean, they're not drunk. They're just like boy drama.
And Lindsay's like, I'm about to have a baby, so I'm very mature. She just sits and looks at her like, you guys are all so crazy.
So then the boys are coming home now, and Jesse got Lexi's number. And so he FaceTimes her.
And he's like, hey, how are you? And she's like, why did you FaceTime me? I just want to see her face. Oh, my God.
Do you miss me? I mean, I didn't say that, but yeah. I mean, so we're just like leaving now.
So we'll be home in like 10 to 15 minutes. You better get ready because when you're home, I'm going to run right into your room and give you a koala hug I would love that what would koala Solomon do burn this house down I can't take anymore I'm fucking at it okay I've already fucking at it it's episode 2 okay break up already because there's only so much of this I can take I hope this whole thing is fast tracked-tracked, where they get married in a week, and then they're messy divorced people, you know, fighting until they both crash down on the chandelier like at the end of War of the Roses by episode six.
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And Paige goes, downstairs could literally be on fire and I wouldn't give a fuck. I hope downstairs catch is on fire.
So Sierra's like, yeah, I wouldn't give a fuck either. And then Lindsay's trying to do the bed thing with Gabby.
And she's like, can I just say something? That was so weird that Carl didn't say Carl didn't say anything she's like yeah like why did you even decide to come back him and his like big ass teeth and his non-alc lover boy is continuing contributing nothing to the party he's like not even going to like pick up girls and she's like yeah like Carl coming back to the house that's a choice but like Lindsay coming back to the house is also a choice it's just like a lot of choices i don't really understand like what show is this what are we what are we shooting this year so um gabby's like whatever you're both boring so she leaves and then in lexi's room jesse's there and he's like koala koala, koala. He's like, oh my God, wait for it.

Koala hugs.

And she climbs him like a tree and gives him the old-fashioned bachelor hug.

Yeah.

He's like, sorry, I'm like a little bit slimy because I have moisturizer on.

And he's like, yeah, slime me up.

Slime me up, which I think may be the new put your weight on me.

Slime me up, bro.

So they are hugging, and

it's annoying. She's like, how was the boys?

He's like, good, I'm a little drunk.

She's like, are you? He's like, yeah.

Is that shocking? So they get into bed and everything,

and they start talking, and then

meanwhile, Carl's downstairs making a steak

and everything. Like a giant,

a giant rack of tumoffs.

This is like some Flintstone shit happening downstairs. That was, it cost like $300.
Yeah, it's a lot. Furnished by Uber Eats.
Just in case anybody's wondering, I saw it on the credits. I did notice that.
So she's like, oh my God, Kyle, did you see how much fucking meat this is? Kyle, men and their meat, am I right? So then back in Lexi's room, they're doing their whole Bachelor thing. They did the koala hug, and now's the part where Jesse announces that he's going to give her the robe, which is going through his trauma.
Which, that's what they do on The Bachelor. When it's time to bang somebody, or at least make out and stay on the show for another week, you gotta bring out drama and i feel like he wasted it i feel like it was too quick well but she had hers she was ready so she she has a j tattooed or maybe it's a necklace or something but he's like hey what does a j stand for is that for jesse and he's like she's like no it's my best friend who passed away jeremy and she talks about how how she's never had someone that close to her

die. And she was

like, you know, she talks about what it was like to

go through that. It was very sad, you know.

And she says that he was like a

model and that like, you know, when she was

young, when she was like 15, people wouldn't

believe in her. But now she was

like, you go out there and you get it.

You're Lexi Wood. Go for it.

He told me, you, you're like you're lexi wood go for it he told me you you're lexi wood i don't know why that part made me laugh it was a very serious part but i just like but i just like that he was the first person who told me you're lexi wood i was like did you never have roll call in school? I mean, at the very least you had somebody ask.

Lexi would?

Lexi would?

Lexi would?

Now I really want to fully dive into every emotion and koala hug like it's the best thing ever.

Then Jesse.

I want to dance like nobody's watching.

I love so loudly now.

I'm like, oh my God, you're loving a little too loudly i have to say here can you love on mute please so now jesse tells her about his testicular cancer which was very scary and um they're basically bonding they have trauma bonding here and so uh they make out this leads to the kiss guys nothing gets me hornier than my best friend dying and somebody else having cancer. I'm like, yeah, time to bone.
So they do that and then they don't bone. They just make out.
And then they decide that they officially like each other. It's a fish.
So then Lindsay goes into the kitchen where Carl is washing dishes. Like a never-ending.
I think that Carl intentionally made dishes dirty so that way he could do dishes for the rest of the evening. He's also so addicted to emotional turmoil because this is the set where everything happens in Carl and Lindsay's relationship.
Like it's all in the kitchen. You know, all of their main.
And, you know, they've had some scenes other places, but most of their main emotional work is done in the kitchen. And so Carl is still stuck in the kitchen this whole trip, cooking, doing dishes, doing more dishes, kicking people out of the kitchen so he can stay in the kitchen because he cannot resolve anything unless it's done with Lindsay in the kitchen.
Yes. So, you know, Lindsay comes in and Wes says hi to her and Carl just like scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub,, scrub, scrub.
And he's like, how was the brunch lunch? And he's like, it was good. It was good.
Jesse is crazy. And they're just sort of talking.
It's like very, it's just patter. But like clearly Carl is there and Lindsay's there.
And they're not addressing each other. So then Carl is basically like, Wes goes out.
Kyle goes off to like fix something with a speaker or something like that. Well, I like when Kyle goes.
Yeah, I mean, Jesse's already in a relationship after like 24 hours. I mean, is that just what happens when you're 6'5"? I mean, God, how do tall guys live? And she's like, hey, it works for some people.
Because, of course, Lindsay is the queen of knowing somebody for five minutes. I mean, look, she's having a baby with this guy already.
She was just with Carl last summer. So she's like, hey, don't knock it till you try it, shorty.
So then finally, Kyle, it's just Carl and Lindsay in the kitchen. So Carl goes, hi, Lindsay.
She goes, hey, Carl. How are you? I'm good.
Just want to congratulate you. Thank you.
Sorry, I didn't get a chance to say anything anything earlier i just figured i'd wait a second you didn't get a chance you were literally standing above her while she was in a pool and you just chose not to but like it's just the way he phrases thing oh i didn't get a chance to say hi it's like no no you literally had the biggest chance to say hello and just the uh well she didn't say hello either to his. Yeah, but it's on him.
He walked in. It's up to him.
He's on, he walked in and he's saying hello to everyone. It's on him to say hello.
So the energy in here was cracking me up because Carl is clearly freaking out. And Lindsay does not care.
Like she not only not cares, she's so icked out by this guy now. And she's doing the thing where she's picking up trash very slowly and just looking at Carl.

Hey, Lindsay.

She's like, hey, Carl.

So congratulations.

She's like, it's OK.

It's a big room setting, Kyle.

I'm sure you were nervous.

And he goes, yeah, I mean, a little nervous.

I just, but I'm genuinely happy for you.

And she just like throws something in the trash and stares at him. And he's like, oh, yeah.
So, you know, I didn't get a chance to say anything early. And she's like, yeah, well, these cupcake wrappers aren't going to throw themselves out.
And I appreciate that. And in fairness, I did say on the basketball courts last summer, who knows where I'll be this summer.
And then we see a flashback to the basketball court where she's like, who knows what's going to happen next summer? Like, I might be pregnant. Fingers crossed.
And here we are. Back to present.
He's like, yeah, here you are. And so Kyle is like listening in, of course, pretending to do stuff for the speakers.
And she's like, but thank you. He's like, you're welcome.
I appreciate that. Of course.
course Kyle why are you listening in you're always you're always pretending like you're doing stuff with the speaker I can see you he's the least subtle person Kyle just stands there looking around making faces like oh my god you're talking right now oh my god so now it's p.m. And Jesse has been made out with.

So he's getting out of Lexi's bed.

And she goes, um, you like me?

He's like, yeah, have fun with the makeup.

So then he goes into his room and Wes is like, how's your girlfriend, bro?

She's like, yeah, she's good.

We had the talk.

You did not. Yeah.
You did not. It's pretty serious, but not like the talk.
Just like the trauma talk. We've trauma bonded.
It was great. Yeah, so then Sierra and Paige are still in bed and Sierra's like, I'm scared of how much I don't want to be here.
I know. It's like being in South Carolina.
I know. It's like, I'll cry.
It's like, because of West, she's like, yeah. It's scary.
And so Sierra tells us that in December, she was having a lot of family issues and she wound up going to Costa Rica over Christmas and she talked about some of this to West and he was the person that she confided to and like shared things with and then he went and put that in the article the new york times article and and he put in the article that like you didn't feel like we were each other's people and that was she said it was just like really hurtful reading everything in the article i'm i'm kind of confused about this um like look i think west is an ass you know and especially after that whole reunion and stuff but i'm kind of confused like why couldn't why can't he say in an article we just weren't each other's person they had already broken up right i'm i'm legit confused about the timeline i think what she's saying here is that she was going through tough stuff and she was sharing with him despite that the fact that they had broken up i'm not sure that they did break up yeah they did break up by then but she still was sharing with him stuff and then he went and said to the new york times like like we aren't each other's people even though when they were sharing it's like yeah we may have broken up but like we're still each other's people i that's what i think that's what i think she means by it that he basically acted like she was some sort of like like person well we didn, we didn't really click as people, it turns out. And she's like, but I was sharing with you deep shit.
Yeah. So this was right after the reunion, I think.
So he's basically, because I guess my question is, he got ripped apart at the reunion, and rightly so. But then he did this article after the reunion, right? I think so.
So that's why I'm confused confused like why would you why would it like i think he's allowed to do an interview with somebody and they of course are going to ask him the whole his whole storyline and all of the only reason he was in the new york times is because he had this like scandal quote unquote scandal with sierra so of course they're going to be like why'd you break up sierra i mean i thought i don't know for me i think what it comes down to i think it as a i think ultimately what it comes down to is she really dug him he you know he pursued her really hard and she was closed off to him because she didn't want to get hurt no no i know all that i'm just saying like the timeline of the reunion i'm just doing a spiel oh i'm sorry i'm sorry yeah yeah go ahead i'm sorry no I'm saying she really opened herself up to him and then

he basically breaks her heart. And then he gets to have two articles on one of the most prestigious newspapers in the country to that base, you know, that basically he gets to control the narrative like, Oh yeah, we just weren't each other's people.
And yeah, it just didn't work out. And she's sitting here like no one's asking her no one's writing articles for her no one's asking to see what she thinks new york times is not asking her when he was one who's the fuck boy so she could say it was about the costa rica stuff or whatever i think she's basically like you got to go out there and repair your image when you really hurt me yeah okay that makes sense yeah that makes sense i'll buy that so then um because like the hating him i totally get that i just don't understand the specificity of the new york times thing and the timing of it like if it was after the reunion and they ripped him apart why wouldn't he say in an interview we just weren't each other's person so that's the that's the only part i'm confused about as far as him hurting her feelings i totally get that but yeah the way you put it i totally get i think she's not totally a mo part of me suspects she's not honest with herself right because she like fucking hates west but remember last episode she was like they're like would you they asked i forgot what question they asked her something like would you get back together with him or whatever it was and she's like i'm not gonna answer that i'm not gonna.
And she even says later this episode, like, Oh, like after I had that fight, after I confronted him, I almost wanted to kiss him. So I think that like when she says, Oh, I'm upset because of this Costa Rica thing.
I think still maybe what's really driving the frustration is that he just got to make himself look like, like a nice guy who just wanted to break up with someone. But I don't know.
I'm a little bit with you. I'm a little confused.
So then next up, let's see. So now in the kitchen again, Carl and Matt are there.
And Carl walks in and Carl's like, oh, clear the air, guys. Clear the air.
Basically said, like, I congratulated her. And then I was like, didn't have a chance to.
Didn't have a chance to. And then I was like, didn't have a chance to.
And then her response was really, really, like, it was actually touching. She threw some cupcake wrappers away.
And then she reminded me on the basketball court that she would be pregnant by this time. So I lose.
So it was great. It was great.
Cut to like two hours from now, eating dinner. Like, hey, everyone.
I've made it, prepared everyone, a tomahawk steak. Except for Lindsay.
Sorry, I didn't have a chance to make your steak. I don't want to make you uncomfortable.
I don't know if the baby is vegetarian or not. So I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable.
I was afraid of you getting angry at me. So he says, I don't know if the baby is vegetarian or not.
So I just didn't want to make uncomfortable. I was afraid of you getting angry at me.
So he says, oh God. He tells us, I just, I feel so much better because I said what I wanted to say.
And it just, it felt genuine. Seemed like she really received it.
And now I guess, I'm guessing I was beet red and shaking. Carl, you said what you said.
All you said was congratulations. Bear your soul.

But you were beet red and you were shaking.

So then it cuts to Lindsay's interview and she's like, Carl will continue to be terrified of me. So he's going to be walking on eggshells around me all summer.
And I don't care if he's there or not. Like literally, physically, emotionally, mentally, taco contractly, manly, babyly, literally moved on.
so I'm

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I'm emotionally mentally taco contractly manily babyly literally moved on so i'm feeling like okay that's like behind me now like you know it took me three hours to three hours to drive out here and then like another full night or a full afternoon and i realized like i just had to say congratulations okay it's behind me i did it I did it I did it huh now now I can go have my my summer now now like that door that that door of saying congratulations to someone's clothes I don't have to ever do that again oh it was so scary oh yeah so now it's dinner time and everybody's coming down and like it's becoming kind of a housewife show and that the first five minutes of every scene now is like oh my god my God, I love your outfit. Oh, my God, I love your outfit.
Do you like my outfit? I love your outfit. So they're doing that.
Jesse's doing that at the moment. And then Sierra kind of falls while getting ready in her room, which is funny.
She's out of nowhere. She's getting ready.
She's like, what the fuck? And then Lindsay is helping Wes bring wine to the table and everything. And Lindsay's like, well, use him quiet.
And he's like, yeah, like whatever. I'm just trying to figure it out.
I'm just assessing. So he's going to be, oh, he's hurt.
The poor fuck boy, you know, has to deal with his consequences. And he's like, I just want to have fun, but I want to be respectful.
And if that means shutting the fuck up for the weekend, I guess that's kind of what it is. So I'll just be quiet here in the corner.
And she's like, I mean, whatever went down between the two of you, and like, I don't know the whole story. And normally I would choose the man sign, but she's hurt.
And he's like, yeah, like, no, like a hundred. a hundred and she's like yeah and she got hurt because of your actions or your inactions right and he's like correct she's like okay so just be like look i'm gonna be on the same page so we can enjoy our summers that's it and he's like uh that's like so straightforward and like cool but like i really need to be more of a victim.
So could I say it? Could you maybe like order a cross on Amazon that I could just kind of splay myself out on while I say that? Here, I was thinking about this because I just I'm afraid that I'm afraid that I don't look like enough of a victim. So how about if I say, hey, Sierra, when I was talking to that person from the New York Times, I thought it was someone who was asking what time it was in New York.
That's it. I had no idea it was an article.
It's like, it wasn't my fault. Do you think that'll fly? So dinner's ready.
Dinner is served. Dinner's served.
I'm sorry if anybody's uncomfortable. I'm getting so good at this.
I'm getting so good at this. Wow.
That was like a lot off my chest.

Because like for a long time, I was like, will dinner ever be served?

Am I going to actually serve dinner?

And now like I served, it just feels like I can finally enjoy my summer now.

So Kyle has to make an announcement on his microphone because not everybody's there.

So he's like, ladies and gentlemen, please report to the dining room.

Dinner is served.

And Kyle's like, oh my God.

Who the fuck gave Kyle a microphone? He's like it's four hundred dollars four hundred dollars thank you so um so then carl's kind of like that guy in motorcycle class who doesn't know how to ride but shows up with uh you know a hundred thousand dollar harley it's like a girl yeah well you know back when i to college, when I was in my frat, we would have fraternity formals every term, and there was always this one DJ. I think his name was like DJ Lou Fucci or something.
And he would... He was from New Hampshire.
Yes, DJ Lou Fucci. I think his name was Lou Fucci.
And he would be there with his press play and everything, and he would get on the mic the exact same way as cause like oh now ladies and gentlemen go to the dance floor for the sigma phi i was like okay so maybe it's just like a new hampshire dj thing like this is just what like it's just in the water of new hampshire to dj like this no that's part of that's part of the job especially at like weddings and stuff you are the announcer who's like and now mother of the bride the dance with the mother of the bride let's check it out everybody oh i really hope his name is lou fucci i gotta find i love that name lou fucci fuck i'm calling it i'm gonna text i'm gonna text friends lou fuji yes so uh everybody comes and um just like girl you look right that's like you all who made it so then um now they're trying to you know they're just making small talk at dinner kyle's putting salt on sierra's steak and she's like um are you trying to be a salt bae she's like yeah man and he's like he's like he's like letting it like do like a little slalom course down his arm off of his elbow into her steak she's like that's not how you do that yeah he's doing the fancy you know the fan is his name salt bae i guess that's his name but the thing was that kyle was doing it incorrectly at first he was just sort of like he was just like elbowing the salt in and then he finally, you do the thing. I don't really, I never got on the appeal of the salt bay thing, but whatever.
That's my hot take, guys. So clip it.
Make it a clip. Put that on the gram, okay? I love that you're starting an internet war with DJ Lou Fucci and Salt and salt bay all in the same episode you're just like burn it to the ground ben doesn't give a fuck today thursday february 20th the day that ben stopped giving a fuck yeah um dj lou fucci what an icon so so then jesse's like so what did you guys do today and gabby's like we talked about you

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So they're making a lot of steak small talk and cooking small talk.

And so Lindsay just goes, I'm a cheers. Thank you you, Carl, for dinner.
I'm not feeling uncomfortable. He's like, oh, okay, good, because I was going to ask.
Okay. And Paige is just like, um, cheers to honestly how mature we are.
Because, God, we're so comfortable being boring, aren't we? And the fact that we can all sit at dinner with no plot lines is a little bit awkward. But it's not super awkward, right? So are we going to start fighting now or what? Time's a ticket.
Time is money. Okay, time is money.
You know, it makes me really appreciate that all those years of having to sit at the same table with Danielle really prepared us for lots of awkward moments around food. So congratulations, guys.
We learned something. And Wes is like, this is like the least awkward I've felt so far.
He's like, I'm talking about you, actually. So, yeah, we do a good job.
Sorry. Sorry.
I have an update. I texted my friend and I said, what was the name of our fraternity formal DJ again? Lou Fucci.
And my friend said, yep, probably still in prison. Lou Fucci.
DJ Lou Fucci's in prison. And now yard time is over.
Let's please all head back to the pens. Yard time is over.
Oh, no. Oh, no.
Here's a headline. Ex-nightclub owner sentenced in murder for hire scheme.

Oh, DJ Lou Fuji.

Oh, no.

That was an awkward bar mitzvah.

Wow.

Wow.

Okay, we'll circle back to that.

His defense was, yeah, I murdered him with my beats.

Murder on the dance floor. Everyone please get to the dance floor wow okay i'm gonna have to look into that uh so carl's like well i mean it could get more awkward it's only friday um so amanda's like kyle's like what's awkward and uh jesse's like i mean look they're sitting across from each other which is cool like Carl and Lizzie are still on opposite side I mean Wes and Sierra are sitting opposite each other but like Carl and Lindsay are still on the opposite side of the table so I guess there's that she's yeah and Wes and Sierra still can't make eye contact so that's fine yeah I'm not gonna do that because like yeah well what do you think about by the way what do you think about his hairdo these days what do you think about west's hairdo and she goes it sucks i was like thank you thank you for just saying it on camera no it doesn't count because she still dated him when his hair was stupid and she didn't say a thing you know what i mean like it doesn't count just because you say it once you're broken up.
If you said it when you were together, I would have respected that comment. His hair last year was stupid, but it wasn't like, to me it wasn't like glaringly stupid.
It just was like, okay, whatever. But this haircut is beyond stupid.
Like this is a terrible haircut. Like it's painful to watch.
This is his Tequila Katie, you know, know orange haircut season essentially you think this is worse than the combed forward broccoli hair come on hundred percent whereas page would say one thousand percent one thousand so uh jesse's like i mean i thought it was awkward before right and sierra says um it's so awkward because people try to be nice and then they put out a lot of press about shit. But like, you know what? Why don't you keep the same energy as your articles and shit, especially your New York Times article? Gabby's like, can we have wine? Can we have wine? Everyone whine? Should we have wine? Gabby's just scrunching down in her chair.
So she's like, yeah. Like, what about sending out a text warning that you're going to drop another new york times article saying oh actually i didn't like her and i should have just said that at the reunion because then that would have read better as opposed to like what i said at the reunion because like that was a beta ass move so then west is like quiet and he goes he's like well you can have a conversation if you want to so now he's doing this thing like Like don't you're embarrassing me in public when he put out he did in a whole article that went out, you know to the nation so she's like well, we're having a conversation and Are you saying you want to have a conversation privately can I help you out here a little bit? Yeah, mom, that's what I want and And Kyle's like, selflessly, I want to witness it.

Because there's only so many speakers I can pretend to fix.

So just do it here.

Also, before when I was like, well, I don't understand why Sierra's so mad.

Well, when she puts it like this, if he really said in this article, like, I didn't really like her.

And I should have just said that at the reunion.

Did he say?

Now, listen, I know I could just very easily read the article, but I'm gonna give him that i'm not gonna i'm not gonna do that to my brain cells i've depleted so many of my brain cells over the years with using abusing losing and boozing i'm not gonna give him any more of my brain cells he's not worth it but if he did say that in the in the article okay now i can totally see why she'd be pissed yeah yeah yeah absolutely

um so kyle's basically like just like nip this in the bud you know so she goes well okay fine so obviously we met up after the reunion and i feel like that was fine and settled and we could have been good and he goes yeah and i've been respectful and she goes no i don't think so you care so much about the perception of everything and meanwhile how embarrassing that you publish an article to reiterate that you don't like me anymore. I mean, if you don't feel the same way, let a bitch know.
I'll be done with it. But it's just so fucking weak.
It's a bitch ass move. But now I'm confused again because I thought they were already broken up by this part.
I'm so confused. Like if you are.
Meanwhile, if you publish an article to reiterate, you don't like me anymore. I mean, if you don't feel the same way, let a bitch know.
But I thought you guys were already there. Anyway, whatever.
Team Sierra still. I'm just confused about timelines.
So West is like, well, I don't think that I meant for it to be taken that way. And she's like, oh, okay.
Then, well, you're a fucking loser anyway. With stupid hair.
Loser. Your hair's a loser, too.
Stupid. And he's like, okay.
And she tells us, you know, I'm talking, I'm getting even more pissed because you're saying nothing. And you didn't think to come a little bit prepared based on the press you were doing.
Like, I literally had nothing to work with. So Jesse's like, well.
She's like, I'm trying to do a scene here. I'm trying to do a scene.
Yeah. They're like, whatever.
It didn't really work out so well. And Sierra's like, yeah, well, that wasn't, that wasn't, guys, that wasn't that intense of a dinner.
I mean, we've had more intense dinners than that. Like, come on.
Yeah, like, literally, Lindsay and Carl were engaged last year. Now look at them.
Paige was just like, okay, next. And Gabby goes, and she's pregnant.
Don't forget that. And she's like, I love this steak.
So, like, they steak so like they're kind of lamos so don't even this is like not even as intense as it could be and lindsey's like um okay well um i have to take a shit and i don't have too often because i'm constipating because i'm pregnant and this is like the first time in a month i have to take a shit so do i have to fight right now and they're like oh just go poop jesus christ she's like okay well that was like a real load off no pun intended like but but like i just now we're gonna close the door on lindsey being able to shit so it feels really good um should we clean up and play some music oh party carl's here guys yeah i'm gonna be able to enjoy the summer, like, really, a lot, huh?

So Sierra is in emotional turmoil,

so she joins Carl in the kitchen,

because that's where you go

when you're in relationship turmoil.

And he's like, oh, thank you, Sierra,

but I'm still trying to figure out

how my I hope you're not feeling uncomfortable

was taken, so I need some time alone in here

to do dishes, so you can leave now.

And she's like, don't have to ask me twice, stupid. you're dressed way too well young lady so Kyle is then Kyle's like wow so Kyle goes up to Wes and goes well I can feel how much it took for her to say that and you going sound just not so great and he's like yeah but I'm not gonna fight with her in front of people uh bro you're on a reality show a reality show.
It's part of the job description. Yeah, and Carl's like, I get it.
I don't have a conflict well, you know? I mean, silence, though, is probably not the way to go. You're wearing a mic for a reason, okay? And Jesse's like, yeah, it's not going to make it go away.
You just have to, like, talk, bro. So he's like, well, I'm not here to tell anyone how to feel or how to react to something

but i know i'm not some evil dude who tried to ruin sierra's life had to read you and all the fucking backlash i was like all alone for all that and i was fucking freaked out in panic mode you know and someone asked me if i wanted to defend myself and i said yeah and i thought it was a relatively gentle article but she read and i guess it didn't land the same yeah I'm sure you were in bed the whole time

with people with fans of the show sucker come on you were doing appearances every night stop acting like oh my god it was so hard for me i had to go through all of that alone yeah so then the girls are all the only blanket i had was the new york times yeah and it was the digital edition so it was really cold i don't think he did it to hurt sierra but i think he did it to serve his ego and i don't think he realizes that when he served like this is what happens with people who are who are like that is they don't realize the sort of collateral damage that they cause so page is like they're all all the girls are in a bed. And Paige is like, well, that was great.
That was a fun time. And Max is like, yeah.
That was so fun. Paige is like, that was amazing.
If they raised the monthly price for whatever that was, I would totally pay it. I would like and subscribe.
She's like, I love nothing more than watching a man squirm. It's amazing.
That's why every, every time I'm sitting in Charleston, I wake Craig up with an algebra question. And then kind of like, ladies and gentlemen, report to the awkward dance floor.
No longer calling it. Club send it.
I see just the awkward dance floor. And so they go there they start gathering down there and then i mean the girls are getting ready and amanda's like wait guys apparently he was at lunch and talking about lexi the whole time like jesse's so in love he was like it's crazy that i was single last year and this year i'm not and page is like it's been 24 hours you nut job jesus i may have to make another man squirm already.
So then they all go to the bar. They go out.
They drink. They have fun.
And then they come back. Lindsay comes back.
Lindsay went out. To her credit, Lindsay went out.
She's like, I'm still going to go out. And then they all get into bed and everything.
And they're doing the usual late night stuff of making snacks and French toast sticks and everything like that. and then they all get into bed and everything.
And they're doing the, like the usual late night stuff of making snacks and like French toast sticks and everything like that. And then Sierra as in her room with Paige.
My favorite was Amanda's. I think we need French toast sticks.
Wow. She's like shaking the box of French toast sticks.
Amanda's really growing on me this year. She's, she's really speaking to everything I love.
She's having a good cut this season. And in fact, she says something later this episode that I really liked.
So Sierra is like, obviously I didn't do anything the first half of the day, but like the second half really wore me off. She's already exhausted.
I'm glad that's where I decided to stop my summary. I'm like, and so finally we end at Paige and Sierra and Sierra says the following, Ronnie, you have the floor.
But it's funny, this is the part where she's like, I know this is toxic, but like, even the sick part of me is like, even though I just cursed you out, like, and I made a whole scene, like, let's make a... You could literally only say this to me, but I fucking get it let me wait let me put this in a different phrase um 1000 so sierra is saying you know like of course like don't you think there's part of me that like wants to hug you and tell you it's going to be fine and like comb your hair yeah but like my gut reaction is that way but like at this point i can't figure out if he even cares and feels bad or if he's just conferred uh concerned with how he looks to the public that's all he cares about don't get dragged back into this by his whininess okay i think as a nurse too she's she's probably wanting to like help heal him and fix him you know but you can't yeah some people are just too the, uh, they're too hurt.
You know, sometimes you just got to push them off the bed and say, someone else needs this bed. That's right.
Take the lessons that you've learned from Austin. Do not get sucked back in.
So, um, then Weston and Jesse are back and they're eating like nuggets and everything. And, and like Jesse really wants to like go into Lexi's room he's like but I can't just go barging in there like even for me her boyfriend so then he like calls her but she doesn't answer so he leaves a voicemail and he's like oh my god even her voicemail's cute oh hey sorry I didn't mean to leave you a voicemail can't wait for a koala hug okay bye so now Kyle and Amanda are in their are in their room and kyle's like i'm just proud of lindsey and karl you know because they were like at the table and they talk about history like it made me happy you know like look we're a dysfunctional family but like it takes away from what the summer is all about you know me getting shit-faced and pissing all over bushes at four in the morning it's just weird weird because she's like pregnant before us.
She's like, no, no, it's not weird. If Carl and Lindsay had gotten married, I had a very, very strong feeling that they would have gotten pregnant before us.
It doesn't matter. He's like, yeah, you're right.
So Amanda says like, you know, there was a time when I thought I would be pregnant by 25. And then when you're, when you're 19, 25 sounds great.
And then when you're 25, having kids by 30 sounds great. But then when you're 30, you realize I'm still a baby.
And so she's really focused on her mental health and she's taking all sorts of different medications and some you can get pregnant on and some you can't. And she's just more focused on finding something that works for her and finding one that she can take.
Um, and if she can get pregnant, possibly fine, but like she's focusing on herself first. And I am am standing ovation for Amanda.
That was a wonderful moment, I think, that she had and good for her for prioritizing herself before anything else. Girl, I think they're going to have to come out with sperm breathalyzer before she even lets one of those things into her.
I mean, that thing's just going to be tripping all over the place in there. You're not ready.
So good for you for noticing. So thenl's like oh i have to go to cbs oh well should you guys should i come back with bagels for everybody and amanda's like oh my god that might be magical you can actually serve um lindsey a representation of your personality and just like something that seems kind of good but is just a center of void seems like it's everything based on the seeds it's just a hole inside it's just vacuous so hey everyone i got everyone bagels oh lindsey i didn't have a chance to get you a bagel but here's a nice long receipt that you can sort of turn into a bagel.
It's from CVS. At the bottom, it says, I'm sorry if you're uncomfortable.
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Going to CVS, that took a lot. I wasn't sure if I should say hi at CVS, but I did.
It felt good. So then Paige is still in bed, and she's like, oh, my God.
When we were at dinner last night, I don't know why, but it was so funny when Lindsay was like, thanks for dinner, girl.

The page is so messy. She literally doesn't even care what's happening.
She's like, I started some mess and it was so great. And Sierra's like, yeah, thanks for the dinner, almost ex-husband.
She goes, yeah, you'd have to drug me to say anything to someone that I used to be engaged to. Like, I would never even speak to them.
Heavy narcotics. So, by the way, how are you you feeling you look like you're not happy right now you're scowling she's yeah well i said what i needed to say and honestly i'm fine i don't know how he feels he doesn't he doesn't he doesn't ever say anything but he's like yeah that's the thing like i don't get that it's so stupid and the haircut gross so i was like yeah but legit if anyone said my hair looked bad she's like i thought i hit him where it hurt page is like i would cry i love how they look at things because page page is like anybody i break up with or any because she said this for years right like you would never see me talking to an ex and i love that she's so dead it's like once you break up Paige, you're dead to Paige forever.
The end. But if you talk about her hair she'll cry.
I would die. That's how to get emotion out of Paige.
So then Lindsay comes walking in and there's like big sort of like overall things and Amanda's like, so Lindsay, have you started buying pregnancy clothes or are you just managing to wear what you had? She's like, great question. Feels like it's sort of a leading question.
I feel like there's a trap. But yeah, I'm like, just getting clothes for me so far.
These are just my own clothes. Like, OK.
It's amazing how like mediocrely you dress pregnant or non-pregnant. It's so consistent.
Congratulations, Lindsay. She's like, OK, I'm going to let you get away with that guac lady.
So then Amanda and Kyle – wait, Kyle's outside getting ready. Oh, so now they're getting ready for their big party, their big Fourth of July party.
And Wes is like, are there bagels down there? And they're all sitting there waiting for the bagels, which I thought was funny because I was like, you know Carl was taking forever they're all sitting like they're all sitting there they've got their coffees out they're on the kitchen island like we're waiting for our bagels where is carl

because you know carl's like okay i've got to make a choice sesame or pop it like what do people want i don't know there's like a lot right now it's like very stressful hold on i'm gonna call my mom i gotta call my mom and her and her and her pastor husband hi i just am like it's like a lot right now it's like a lot of bagels to choose from and i'm just like not really sure which one to choose i'm not sure it's like really rough i've been through a lot and i'm really not sure what bagel to choose so i just broke up with the bagels and i left them at checkout left them at checkout i'm just like so glad to like leave that behind me literally like leave the bagels behind me and i could just like enjoy my summer I was cracking up at Wes though because he comes down still all sad He's like hi guys. I just wanted to remind you.
I'm still like really sad about being here Are there any bagels? And Sierra sees him and she goes oh my god now he's acting like someone fucking stole his goldfish So they're gonna set up for this like they're gonna have a they're setting up their party and everything and west is outside with the guys and he's like yeah it was really rough and cal says well as awkward as it was last night i know you were frustrated i feel like there's gonna be some opportunity today so because i don't want you to have this awkward tension it's kind of a bummer man so now west is like i don't want to have a conversation with sierra i'm scared scared. But I could go into any room last summer and I wanted to just kick down the door and just be fun.
And now I don't feel that way this summer. I'm just like an outcast.
Oh, God. So he goes to sit next to Sierra.
He's like, can I sit here? Am I allowed? Should I go sit on a trash can somewhere? And Lizzie's like, I'm sitting here. I'm sitting here.
So Paige is like, who's coming to this party? So everybody's talking about who they're bringing to the party. And Lizzie's like, well, guys, I'm not coming to the party because I don't know if you have Instagram, but it was a huge week for me on there because I announced my baby and my partnership with Clear Blue.
So I'm going to go celebrate that back home with a party called Clear Blue Pizza Beach. She's literally having a party to celebrate her Instagram announcement.
And Carl's like, oh, so fucking Lindsay. She's like, I got 19,000 more followers and we're celebrating.
Sorry. I mean, the fact that Lindsay is not going to be here for the 4th of July party fourth of july party i mean like thank god i can finally spread my wings and not have to worry about being disrespectful you will never see someone wash dishes with as much carefree energy as i will have i'm single i want to meet someone i want to not talk to them i want to be a little scared and go back into the kitchen and be like safe place safe safe place, safe place.
I can't wait. Yeah.
Like, I want a new day. I'm basically starting over again.
Wow. What better place to find a healthy date than a raging alcohol-fused party in the Hamptons? So then Gabby's like, I'm going with you, too, because my sister's in town.
So, of course you are. Yeah.
Gabby, you need to stay and make your own life gabby okay you can only be used so long as lindsey's crutch they all get thrown out they all do that ankle heals so carl is like so everyone today is like classic battle of the sexes and the boys are gonna have this section of the lawn and the girls are gonna be over there and like our guests are gonna be like be voting today on who who has a better setup the boys party the girls party just when you do cast your vote I'm just going to let people know please just be like gentle and tender with it because there's like a lot of emotions happening here thanks girls if we're going to win we have to like flirt with everyone so they are going to have a big competition so then Paige Paige FaceTimes Craig. And she's like, chicken, what's up? And he's like, hey, baby, just hanging by the pool.
I'm missing you. Craig, you're going to get skin cancer.
Do you ever go inside? The only thing we've seen of Craig from the past year is being out in front of them. Now, listen, that pool is something to be proud of.
It's a gorgeous backyard. But you've to go live, Craig.
Go live. SPF bro.
SPF bro. So Paige is like, wow, it looks so freaking nice there.
That was sarcasm. I'm in the Hamptons.
I have my own pool and a nicer house. And Craig is like, wow, how's it going? It's good.
It's just a little awkward the first night. Lindsay announced that she was pregnant.
And then Carl came the next day. And honestly, they were like more normal than Sierra, than West.
And West. So she's like really like, really like you know she really lit up lit into him and said his hair was stupid and she's like you're a fucking loser and your hair looks fucking stupid it was actually really hilarious okay chicken I think I want to break out with you by the end of the summer so just thinking about that putting that out there in the ether what do you think that's a lot to take on um so he's like well they had so much promise and she's like well when are you going to come to the city he's like well I can't come until next weekend uh this week has been really busy but like I was hoping you could sneak away like during the week and she goes um to come to you hold on let me open my iCal no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Sorry. I have a lot going on.
Yeah. I have a sponsorship with ABC Airlines, which stands for anywhere but Charleston.
So I'll be flying all around the country to anywhere. And she's like, um, mark the day.
Cause I'm going to say it. I feel bad for Craig.
Okay. That's all you're getting out of me.
Interview over. I'm a completely different person than the person he started dating three years ago.
I'm busier. I'm not around as much.
I have higher standards. I've changed my mind about a lot of things like Craig, you know, like marriage and moving and a baby.
I went from saying, ew, I never want to have a baby to, I never want to have a baby. That's a big change for me.
Yeah. Like, you know, she's basically saying, you know, I don't regret changing or having my wants changed.
And I'm not going to apologize to it about it. But I do have to admit that, like, it sucks for him because I have changed.
Like, I have changed my mind on a lot of stuff, you know. And so then Lindsay and Gabby leave.
And now the decoration wars begin. So the girls are planning and Kyle comes over.
He's like, oh, just here to grab a little non-alc, little non-alc. Something soft.
And then Amanda's like, scram. So then Wes goes up to Sierra's room.
He's like, are you alone? And she's like, me? Yeah. What do you want? And so he's like well is this summer gonna be fucking awful she goes hmm i don't think it's fucking awful i mean it's pretty hilarious watching the squirm so she's like uh it's fun for me are you just gonna get a stupid haircut every week for me to mock because i'm loving this great trend he's like but last night i don't i don't think felt like you were moving forward at all it's like yeah because like every time i do something or confront you in front of everybody you like give minimal response and he's like um but like we haven't even like talked since like december january and like i thought we kind of had closure uh but the whole reunion was like god i mean i just sounded like an idiot and i'm like trying to figure this out day by day and like i know i'm not the best out of it but i'm just a boy a boy with the part i'm just a boy standing in front of a girl asking her to not make fun of his hair so sierra's like well you could have been completely deaded coming into the house but like you're putting out all this press like post reunion when we could have just left it at the restaurant after we got drinks and you could have just left it at that.
It's like, yeah, but if I would have known that that's what, if I had, would have known that talking shit about you on a national publication would have upset you, I never would have done it. If I had known that I would have made it more peaceful.
I wouldn't have fucking done the article but i i think i felt like in defense like for so long that anytime someone is like hey wanna wanna do an article and she's like yeah no no that's he basically starts to mutter about like like but people feel this way about me and then that sets her off and he wants to defend himself or whatever and she's like yeah but what I'm saying. Like, you care what everybody else is saying, you know, like you're riding this wave and like people don't know us.
They don't know you. When you're up, you're up.
They kick you while you're down. And that's just how it is.
He goes, well, I'm learning that now. But like, you know, you don't really learn that until you get a New York Times article.
It's hard. It's not perfect.
I mean, I fucked up and I'm trying to figure this out and apologize for saying things that hurt your feelings and i'm not even ever even trying to hurt you it's just not my intentions if you know me i think you know i'm not trying to hurt you i'm just you know just trying to be in the new york times some more and i think one of the things that's the most annoying to her about it is when they when he kept trying to come on to her and stuff she was like look i were on a tv show and i have already looked stupid on said tv show over a guy and i don't want you to make me look stupid and so she was worried about public perception as well that was kind of the point she's like i don't want to look stupid again and then he not only did it and made her look stupid but now he's's turning around going, but now I look stupid on TV.

And she's like,

fuck off.

Like I'm supposed to feel bad for you.

I warned you.

That's what you were doing to me.

And you did it.

You fucking did it.

And now you're sitting here crying that everybody hates you.

Yeah.

So he's like,

well,

hopefully we can be around each other.

And she said,

she tells us,

I think that me and West were genuinely friends.

Yeah.

And it made a lot harder when it ended because you're losing someone

that you want to tell everything to, and can I be

friends with Wes again? I don't know.

I really don't know what to tell you.

But she thanks him for apologizing

and everything, and it seems like they

end on a

conciliatory note. Maybe they'll

patch things up, but that's basically where the episode ends.

Yeah, good one.

Very funny. Thanks everyone for being here.
We got Southern charm happening tomorrow and we will catch you on the next episode. Go get those tickets for the mounting hysteria tour and we will see you on the road or in the podcast app.
Bye. Bye.
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