#2975 Below Deck S12E12 Part 2: Docked Over

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Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens.

This is part two of a two-part recap.

If you're like, hey, wait a minute, I didn't hear part one.

Guys, it's because we put out a lot of recaps.

Go back and listen to part one, okay?

It's before this one.

Bye.

Enjoy the show.

Back in the galley, there's a big pile of trash just sitting there.

And Anthony's like, fucking trash sitting here all day.

Have you seen that stereo anywhere?

And Rainbow's like, I haven't seen anybody.

I'm on my own island.

Call back.

And Anthony's like, what are they doing?

She goes, I don't know.

What the fuck?

So then he's like radioing.

He's like, can someone take out the trash?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Trash, trash, trash.

I'm building a mountain of trash over here.

It's like, this is like Paris.

Come on, someone fix the trash, please.

So Hugo's just hanging out in the mess, not answering.

Jess is making out with Barbara.

No one's doing anything.

So Anthony starts to unravel.

He's like, I'm building a mountain of trash over here, like in Paris.

And Selene's like, you always think the cruel mess history, nothing I don't know why it's not taking trash

okay go ahead go ahead okay any chance to wrap the trash on the galley because it's already starting to have a little mountain over here he's like yep no no problem gotcha copy

I'm gonna eat some more combos really really slowly and not do a thing that I just said I would do or tell people who are right around me to do it because I'm Hugo.

Yeah.

He just sits there and then he's like, it's actually infuriating because this happens on every season of Blow Deck.

Is that the deck hands, especially on these sort of charters, just do nothing.

And like, you're not, the boat's not moving.

So you can't even say, oh, well, we were anchoring and doing this or that.

Like you put out some, you put out, sure, you did, you put out some like the toys and did like a, like a sunset cruise and you've been washing the decks, but like the, the interior has been working like crazy.

And now they're all just like sitting around doing nothing, of course.

So Selene grabs the trash and then she has a whole kind of like slapstick moment where she's trying to put the trash into like the recycling bin and she is heavy and she can't get it up and lifting the thing up.

And it's a whole, it's a whole like, you know, yuck, yuck moment.

Yeah.

So Anthony is pissed.

He's like, I work hard.

These guys aren't doing shit.

This is so disrespectful.

So Anthony goes down to the crew mess and he's like, hey, bro, bro, bro.

When I asked you guys on the radio, like one of the dick team about the trash and he goes like, did they not go?

What the?

He's like, no, nobody showed up well I saw one of them I thought they were heading over there I mean she was holding hands with the girl and they were talking about jam I assumed that was lingo for we're about to go do a whole lot of work for the chef guess that didn't work out huh maybe I should have asked

Well, for me, it was like, Anthony, go fuck yourself with the trash, you know?

So Hugo says, Anthony coming at me with this fucking trash is a joke.

I think it's fucked up with what he does to the crew.

When he goes in these spirals and he just starts yelling and everyone's just supposed to turn their back and go, oh, well, that's Anthony.

I don't like that shit.

Don't fucking come at me with that angle.

I'm not going to fucking pity party your ass.

Yeah, you don't have to like his attitude, but like if you have a responsibility to clear up your trash from the galley, do your job.

Do your fucking job.

Yell at you.

And also the last time Anthony yelled at you guys was when he had to cook your whole fucking dinner on vacation because no one would help him.

So Anthony's, you know, behavior is not great, but you guys are being dicks.

And it's the second time in the row that you've been there.

And you're blaming him as crazy when you haven't taken out the fucking trash, sir.

Yeah, he's like,

really, all eyes are on him, and they should know that.

And you're like, he needs to have organization in his galley.

And you guys are just sitting around.

You're literally sitting in the corner of the crew mess doing nothing.

You have Jess, who's making out with Barbara.

You have there, it's, and you've got two of the guys are just in their room, just on their phones, relaxing.

So I think it's like bullshit that Hugo is going to be like, I don't like the way he's treating me.

Hugo has actually proven to be a little inept, you know, because Hugo also did not shut down the thing with Kyle.

That that sort of festered the whole thing when Kyle was bragging.

Hugo's the one who actually should have reported it.

It shouldn't have even been, Fraser shouldn't have even been in a position where he um like has to like potentially report it to Carrie because that should have been on Hugo who did that in the first place.

So Hugo's sort of like a little shit.

Yeah, so then now it's 11 p.m.

The guests are bored, so they go to bed.

And Jess and Barbara are kissing, but Jess goes back to her cabin and Rainbow checks out the list of stuff to do and it's done before Celine goes to bed.

And Rainbow's like, has hell frozen over?

Because I feel like Selene is not distracted.

So she's actually doing her job.

Like the bitch is working.

And that's because I wasn't nice to her because I finally stood up for myself.

You just got rainbowed.

You mess with the horns.

You're going to get the rainbow.

So now.

It's the morning, 6 a.m.

and Ron is up and he's like, I mean, it's kind of pathetic that we come come spend $60,000 and this boat doesn't even move.

I mean, fair point.

Fair point.

True.

I'm not saying that that's not true.

I'm just saying I wouldn't act like I'm stuck at like an Applebee's.

Okay.

Like you're still in a really beautiful situation.

Yeah, I would be.

I would be super pissed.

I think he totally has a right to be pissed.

Just take it out on the right people.

And you know what?

Call your Amex and say, reverse this charge.

The boat never moved.

The boat.

Period.

So

yeah.

I would ask for half off, to be honest.

So I would ask, I would would say I'm not paying for this.

Period.

They shouldn't have to pay for anything.

I would say, actually buy me a yacht.

At this point, buy me a yacht.

It's not that.

I would actually say, you need to buy me some children from overseas because I would be a good parent and I've never been able to afford it.

So it's kind of fair.

I would be a good parent.

I would.

I have chalkboards ready for when they go to school.

Like, I'm ready for the process.

I have seashells.

I have a piano to learn chopsticks on.

Okay.

Okay.

I deserve children.

So there's going to be a delay with the part.

More delays in the part.

Yeah.

Good news.

I got a text.

Bad news.

The part's delayed.

Good news.

Wednesday's back.

Bad news.

Second season sucks.

Just found out last night.

God.

Morning.

The person is flying here with the pot.

The bad news is

their arms are really tired.

It's a joke.

All right.

We're not going to be going anywhere.

Okay.

We've got, but we've got to do, so we've got to do something good.

Water sports, snorkeling, reach arounds, whatever it takes.

Come back to the boat for lunch.

All right.

She wants to jump in the water.

This woman wants to jump in the water with a wedding dress off the tender because she thinks that's going to be funny.

So if we pull that off, it's going to save the charter.

All right.

So time is of the essence.

I don't want them getting delayed and sitting around doing nothing.

So

me neither.

That is exactly what I don't want.

So, all right, guests.

guests, today we're going to take you out snorkeling.

I know you want a picture of you two together jumping off a boat wearing your wedding dress, which is absolutely pathetic, but we will relive that feeling that you first felt in that dress, which I hope is dread and instant regret, because it's what's on your face right now.

Let's do this.

I know you wanted to photo, a majestic photo of you jumping off the bow of the boat, a tall maggie yacht in the background as you plummet into the ocean with nothing but an unblemished horizon in the background.

But instead, what we can offer is you jumping off a tiny dinghy around an industrial seaport.

So Rainbow goes to check on Anthony and he's like, what is happening?

She goes, nothing.

By the way, they're loving it.

They are absolutely loving everything that's going on.

Everything is going great.

He goes, okay, well, I need to know everything because you know how much everything everything is stressing me.

She goes, um, I don't have time for the speech.

Okay, bye.

She walks off.

He's like, what the fuck?

What did you just fucking say?

What?

We all know the way you deal with stress is you internalize it until you have a panic attack late at night and cry in the corner and then come back and act like nothing happened.

And if that's still not good enough, you go to an island and you punch a bitch.

She's like, um, find a sibling to abuse.

I'm busy.

Bye.

I gave you my perfunctory compliment of the day and I'm going back to my cleaning.

So the guests go snorkeling and they look like they actually have like a very fun day there's like chicken that's served in a pineapple that was cool the chicken pad or the pad thai served in a pineapple was really neat yeah that was fun i did that for the first time i i carved out a pineapple like that for the first time for the white lotus seasoned finale and it was really fun you could it's actually not what you put in like

um like a Thai rice of some sort.

I love it.

Like carving out the pineapple is not hard at all, people.

You just literally, there's like a million tutorials online and it takes about three seconds and it looks really like fun and special.

So

my hack for for being stuck on land all day, carve a pineapple.

Carve a pine.

So we go to Denise and Ron taking their jumping pick.

It's, you know,

as weird as you would think.

Yeah.

It's some like

the whole reason she's doing it is because she's like, I still fit in my wedding dress, bitches.

It's like her Facebook post where she can be like, hi, everybody who's gained weight since they got married 10 years ago.

Guess who didn't?

Me.

That's right.

It's been 10 years.

Guess who spent thousands of dollars on this dress and now is going to willfully destroy it by jumping into the waters of a St.

Martin harbor.

Me.

Here we go.

Yeah.

Then there's like

these parties.

Oh, God.

Then we get a 70s theme party.

Yeah.

This is not, this is not what to do when people are stuck on the boat.

put on wacky 70s costumes.

I'm glad we kind of fast-forwarded through it.

Yeah, this was one of those charter days where production just like zipped through it very quickly.

Yeah.

And then Anthony made a beef Wellington and then he made a vegan melanase.

He did, he was like, he was firing an all-cylinder, dealing with all these, all these requirements.

Then people were dancing.

He's doing great, by the way.

He's made really good looking food today, aside from the baby arm.

octopus but um a wellington's not that easy and i mean he's pulling off a lot of stuff so good for him.

Yeah, we're very proud of him, our little baby, so proud.

I mean, you get a little confidence into that tight-jeaned little man and look at him go, you know.

Yeah, he's he's really he's grown, he is growing.

So, um, now it's 2:30 in the morning, everyone gets to bed, and now third day of the charter, 6:30 a.m., Carrie calls the yacht agent

about giving the guests a discount.

And 20%,

sorry, that's not going to cut it.

Shockingly bad.

20% is like it should not be 20%.

It should be at least 50.

At least 50.

I would say this boat's not even moving.

We can't charge them.

And then have them say, okay, tell them we'll give them half off or something.

But you don't start at 20.

What kind of negotiator are you?

It was bad.

I think it's actually rude.

Yeah.

It's rude.

It's wrong.

So then Damo's talking to Kyle and Kyle's like, Damo's like asking how Kyle is.

And Kyle's like, I just feel awkward every time I'm around the guest.

No, you know, it's hard when you have a ballooner, but you know you can't stick it into a guest.

It's so hard for me.

It's very, very awkward.

But these are the actions of my consequences.

Yes, I heard you.

Let us talk about it.

Damo's like, I'm not entirely sure if you're saying that ironically or not, because it seems like you're making a joke of it.

And he goes, yeah, I am.

Like, okay, so you see, he's taking no responsibility.

He's just mad that there's consequences.

So I don't know if Kyle realized that he reversed the order there because he said, these are the actions of my consequences.

So Damo, I think Damo's like, did you mean to say it that way?

And he said, well, the rest of the episode are the actions of his consequences because now he's getting consequences and it's sending him into action, which is

being terrible.

Yeah, exactly.

So then he gets another Instagram wall.

I think he's actually the only Instagram walls of the season.

I think they have started to mitigate the Instagram walls, which I appreciate.

So we got two Kyles, which is only rough because we have to see a lot of his photos up close and personal.

And he's like, I'm usually pretty outgoing.

I love life.

I love people.

I just don't know what to place myself.

I don't know what to do.

I'm a ghost on this ship.

I shouldn't be here.

But I'm here.

I'm just pissed off.

I just want to get the job done and fuck off.

I'm over it.

I'm fed off.

I'm like, I'm sorry.

I'm not.

I just, I cannot be on board for Kyle's existential crisis.

Like, you were inappropriate.

You're being punished.

Like, just do your job and move on.

Like, he's literally mad now that he's not fired.

What a weirdo.

He's like, I'm not on the ship.

Oh, come on.

Relax.

Two of the guys from the guest,

whatever, two of the guests are like, what, what, what's your suggestion about the additional stuff for the crew?

And he's like, nope, no tip is not a reflection of our group.

It's a reflection of the circumstances.

No, it's a reflection of your group.

The reflection of the circumstances is refusing to pay for the yacht.

Not fucking over the people here.

You are such a wuss.

You would rather fuck over the people who can't fight back than fuck the people that could sue you, is what you're saying.

Yeah.

Exactly.

Bad.

And so Ron's like, well, I think I need to explain that to the captain.

And it's like, well, he's right there.

He's like, oh, oh, okay, Doug.

Well, you're the one talking all big and trying to talk him up to it.

So why don't you go with him to talk to the captain, you wuss?

He's like, oh, yeah, we're not paying for shit.

We shouldn't have to.

It's not a reflection of us.

Okay, you go talk to him.

Yeah.

I'll just sit.

I'll just sit here at the bar and watch.

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So Ron pulls Carrie for a chat and he's like, Well, you know, first of all, you guys have been great, by the way.

I mean, a little upset you guys didn't have some just for men because, as you can tell, I ran out of, I ran out just at the, right at the end there.

But we've been completely happy.

I mean, just, I mean, just so happy.

But I think normally when something is significantly wrong, I mean, the boat doesn't leave, that's not like a small matter right it's like no absolutely not not at all uh you're gonna get to a point here because i'm sort of binging wednesday at the morning moment and i just really really need to get back to it or need to see what that crazy hand is up to

well we're all in the service industry i mean look at us all service right so usually i hate when people say that as if everybody in the world doesn't know that this is gonna like that doesn't give you an an extra anything to say I'm in the service industry when people are like, you guys, we didn't get our drinks on time and we're in the service industry.

Oh, really?

Because people who aren't in the service industry love getting terrible service.

Like, what do you think that gives you over everybody else?

Shut up, Ron.

So he's like, yeah, and you know, there's a standard gratuity, but I don't know that the group's going to be happy about doing that because everybody knows if you have a great waiter and terrible food, you should fuck over the waiter every single time.

Yeah.

Right, captain

yeah and so and meanwhile the guests the the crew is um like barbara and rainbow were talking about how their their tip is probably gonna be shit whatever so carrie's like well it's more mad now i just got myself more mad because being in the service industry you do have a leg up to know if the restaurant fucks up the restaurant takes a loss not the waiter what is wrong with you you should know better

you comp the meal yeah i i almost wonder like did did ron already talk to the charter company and were they like we're not going to give give you anything?

I don't know.

But Terry's like, well, at the end of the day, you get nothing for nothing, quite literally.

And it's a service industry.

And if the house makes a mistake, the staff shouldn't suffer.

So,

Carrie,

yeah.

Thank you.

Ron's like, well, but this is a ship, not a house.

So

yachting wouldn't be what it is if all the boats never left the dock, right?

It would be reasonable for that component of this to influence the way people thought.

Like, normally the owner or whoever's in charge of that would do something to make it, make it right.

Do you understand?

Do you understand how sad my white streak in my hair is right now?

Do you see it's crying?

I can't see it crying.

No, I know that's not your call, but my hair hurts.

My hair really hurts right now.

He's like, well, I've had a discussion with the agent about that.

And there should be some compensation on the front end of the charter.

And I've been told that there's a discussion that you and them will be having after.

Oh, hell no.

That company sucks.

They need to have this conversation right fucking now.

This boat's not leaving.

I'm on the road side, too.

I just I just don't like how he dealt with it.

I'm sorry.

What did you say?

We all know the company, the quote-unquote company is Bravo, right?

Has to be.

I don't know how this works.

If it's Bravo or if it's the actual owner of the boat who does it.

I don't know.

I feel like it's the owner of the boat.

I think no matter what, like you do a tip because the service was still really excellent.

Maybe, I mean, maybe it wasn't excellent.

Like there was that jet ski issue, but like you could see that everyone was working super, super hard to keep them entertained and to compensate.

And I think punishing the crew is

shitty, you know?

Well, they get a huge discount, right, for shooting the show.

So if this was, I think it's like 50% off.

So if they're paying 60, this probably would have cost them 120 grand.

So maybe the boat gets, the boat owners rented out for the show and they're taking kind of a loss anyway because they're saying, okay, we'll let you shoot on the boat.

for half the price because at least we're using the boat more, you know?

And so if the thing doesn't happen and the boat doesn't move, they're probably telling Bravo, like, hey, listen, you're still shooting.

Bravo's still making their money on this episode.

So we want our money from this episode.

Like, you're not going to stiff us when you still got to shoot this episode on our boat.

So maybe that could cause some kind of complications or something.

Yeah, maybe.

Or maybe this guy's just a dick wad.

So that's true.

She's.

Jess goes up to Kyle.

She's like, how are things going?

Any actions and consequences you want to share?

And he's like, well, I need to watch what I'm doing and drinking and whatnot.

So Monty Nice.

I fucking love drinking though.

So at the point where I should stop, that's where I go.

It's time to fucking go harder, you know?

Oh, yeah.

I love when people have this discussion.

They're like, you know what?

I really need to do change.

That's the problem with me.

I just don't know how to stop.

Oh, gonna drink this entire bottle of whiskey in five minutes.

Because that's what happens.

So I can't feel for Kyle.

Well, if you go down that road, you'll probably get a DY.

There's going to be a point where you can't turn back.

It's like, yeah, absolutely.

He's like, looking forward to it.

Yeah.

So there's some lunch, and it is a sad little lunch.

It's like little sandwiches, you know, like lunch sandwiches when you're in the first grade and your mom's in a hurry.

And she's like, here, here's some turkey with some cheese slapped on there.

Get the fucking lunch, a little complainer.

All right.

Yeah.

And Damo gets it and he's like, oh, is this all lunch?

Gee-eesh.

And Anthony's like, well, come on, you know, food is food.

Captain told me, if I don't have time, make a sandwich.

You know, it cannot be Christmas every day, guys.

Okay.

Unfucking believable.

Show me some respect.

I'm part of the tips.

I do my best for the crew.

I'm working hard, hard, bro.

I'm not your bitch.

All my life, people put me down, and I'm tired with that.

Fuck off.

Fuck off.

Now you get sandwiches.

You know what?

I absolutely side with Anthony on this.

Like, did Damo work up an appetite from all the not docking he was doing?

You know what?

Eat your sandwich.

I know it's not like fancy, but like, guess what?

I have sandwiches like that like most of the week.

Like we'll survive.

You know, you'll

probably be snacking.

You're probably snacking all day anyway.

Just eat your sandwich.

Yeah.

And eat two.

Eat two of them instead.

Yeah.

If you, if you eat two or three, eat your fill and then say, we need more.

We ran out.

But he's complaining about the sandwiches.

Everyone else's sandwiches and then blame the chef.

But like sand people are food.

I'm a working boy or whatever.

Yeah, but like I thought that was really disrespectful when he's been cooking nonstop for like two straight days.

And then you're going to come in here and be like is this it is this all we get like this just i think it's totally obnoxious i mean i thought so too but don't you think that anthony is probably getting revenge because no i think anthony's being passive aggressive passive regressive passive aggressive because nobody took out the trash and so now he's like okay now you're gonna get sandwiches as he should

actions have consequences These are called consequence sandwiches.

I will gladly eat them.

Yeah, because they basically said, oh, we don't really give, we we don't really care about Anthony.

So, why is he after he has worked this crazy charter non-stop with like all these different requests and like having to really go above and beyond because they're docked?

Why should it be like, wait, now let me drop everything for this crew?

I mean, yes, he should do that for pride in his job, but they were just totally disrespectful to him.

And so, he's like, You know what?

I'm just gonna make you sandwiches today because I'm busy and you don't have respect for me.

So, guess what?

It goes two ways.

Yeah, okay.

So, now the guests are departing, and Ron's like, guys, you were all A plus, plus, plus, plus, plus, plus.

Chef Anthony, we threw you curves, you know,

vegans, some, not some vegetarians.

It was just great.

Fraser, your customer service.

God, we're in the customer service business.

We own restaurants.

So you epitomize customer service.

And we've got something for you, which is to show.

How much we didn't appreciate your service.

Thanks, suckers.

Thanks, losers.

I need to look up who

is this guy and what his restaurants are.

I need to find, like, I'm going to have to hit up our old friend Gina Ragusa, who writes, who's like, she's a writer, and she always seems to know who all of the

guests are.

Because I want to know

who this person is and whose restaurants are.

Because I want to find out.

I want to find out what's going on.

And then I'm going to talk about, I'm going to talk about those Yelp reviews and everything because I bet this guy has shitty, shitty restaurants.

Ron.

Well, the search results mention other below deck chefs like Marcos, who has blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

None of them are associated with Ron.

Oh, I can't find it so far.

It's always really annoying.

It's always like,

it's always.

I wish that Bravo was better about like giving details about these guests because every time they leave, I always want to like look them up and find out all the details and you never ever can.

All right.

Yeah, I want to know.

We get to the bottom of this.

I want to know too, but I can't find it.

So maybe we'll see later.

Someone will come out with it.

Someone will.

So

shame people.

Now everybody, Anthony pulls Damo aside and he's like, let's have a quick chat, bro.

What was that?

A sandwich?

I didn't like that direction, bro.

And he's like, oh, it's just, it wasn't a lot.

And he goes, well, I'm working 16 hours a day, you know, brawl.

So he's like, I'm not a little bitch.

And when I hear that the primary guest was happy, my job, remember one thing.

Part of the tip is part of me too.

So So you remember that today when you get your amazing tip.

This is all me.

Everybody, today's tip is because of me.

That is funny.

It's like, well, we just need a bit more food, man.

Like nobody thinks you're a bitch.

Nobody thinks you work for us.

But while you're here, do you mind mopping the floor over there?

Or can you stop with that attitude?

I'm not the bitch here.

And what I hear, the primary guest was very happy of my job.

So remember, remember me.

And Hugo's like, oh, calm the fuck down.

Hugo, shut up.

No one's talking to you, sir.

Okay.

You need to shut your face.

You're being a real asshole this whole episode.

You be quiet or you're going to get little consequence sandwiches all season.

I love a consequence sandwich.

Actually, I can really go for a consequence sandwich right now.

I'm not going to lie.

So, so Carrie's like, all right, all right, everyone, meet in the sky lounge.

Sky lounge, everyone.

So they all, the crew gathers before Carrie gets there.

And,

you know, Fraser is like, they all gather there.

And Anthony's angry.

And Barbara's like, well, I hope, I hope Anthony's making some snacks.

And

Fraser's, and Selane is like, yeah, we didn't have lunch.

And Fraser goes, yeah, I wouldn't keep saying that.

Xne on the lunch day with Anthony.

A.

Okay.

A.

So here, this is where I get confused.

So he didn't even feed the whole staff.

Like, did the crew, did the guys just eat all the sandwiches?

Because he was making, remember he was like cooking he was cooking in the galley and he had to step away to go to this meeting.

So he just gave sandwiches to the deck crew to like shut them up and then was gonna cook other stuff for later

Maybe or maybe they ran out of sandwiches.

Maybe the deck crew did eat all the sandwiches.

I'm not sure, but he was definitely he was definitely in the galley cooking something because I thought he went to the galley to cook after the conversation with Damo because Damo's like, we're just saying it's not enough food.

So he's like, okay, fine.

So he went back to the galley to make more food is how I was taking it.

I don't, I don't know.

know.

This is so stupid.

Like just getting caught up in this stuff.

Like, I have to remember what we're watching sometimes.

I'm like, wait a minute, who got

the sandwiches?

I honestly keep on thinking about those sandwiches and I want one really badly.

Like, I'm craving who's stopping you.

You got some bread in your fridge?

I mean, in your pantry.

No, I'm going to make a sandwich, but we're podcasting, so I'm not going to stop the podcast.

Stop the podcast.

You need a sandwich.

That's a reason.

Could you, man?

Bring the microphone up to the

kitchen?

Yeah.

So Fraser's like, please stop saying that, Barbara.

She goes, well, what time is it?

So Anthony comes in.

He's like, okay, here I am.

Long day.

I'm finally okay.

I argued with everybody.

Now I'm calm again.

She goes,

where's lunch?

And he's like, God damn it.

What the fuck, bro?

And get that out of there.

No, no, I'm not doing this.

I'm not doing this.

Fuck everyone.

Everyone, be careful.

I'm going down to the galley and I'm going to do the most violent thing known to man throwing a tea towel at the refrigerator be careful give me some space he tells everybody fuck y'all go fuck yourself so he storms off and throws the towel and fraser's like i told you not to say that i literally just said she was oh i'm i didn't understand what was it you said

no

barbara these are the consequences of your actions right now do you understand do you understand what i go through no so

anthony's down there, like, I'm going to serve you fucking lunch because it's treating me like a little bitch.

I'm sick of being little bitch, little boy, can't read.

Oh, really?

Oh, really?

I'm going to feed you dyslexia.

Enjoy this dyslexia soup.

So now Jess goes to chase him down, and she's like, just ignore them.

They don't understand.

It's like, it's fine.

It's fine.

I just need to, you know, I need to have

fit and then I'm fine.

Okay, I'm fine.

Yes, I just need it.

It'll be fine.

I'll be fine.

Okay.

They're just like, come on, come on.

It's okay.

It's okay.

Come up.

And Freeze was like, she didn't realize you were sensitive to that.

She didn't know you had to make more food.

Come on, it's all right.

It's all right.

Here, I promise that after this meeting, I'll help you shave your eyebrows even more narrow, okay?

We're going full Joan Crawford today.

All right, all right.

I will do that.

I will come upstairs with you.

All right.

So he comes back upstairs.

He's like, sorry, everyone.

I freak out.

I overheat.

But everything is okay now.

They're like, okay, geez.

Meanwhile, everybody else is like, guys, let's try to guess how much tip there will be.

I think a million dollars.

I think it's going to be $45,000.

And Carrie comes in.

He's like, ah.

Good news.

We got money.

Bad news.

God, Wednesday spent it all on.

Crap.

What a terrible season.

Waste of my life.

All right, listen, I want to thank everyone for working hard.

Unfortunately, the guests, in their mind, they punished us for the boat not moving, which I don't think is fair.

Because as you saw, Hugo stood on the side of the boat, scratching his head for about three hours, which I think is worth something.

So,

fortunately, we got 19 grand, which is 14.61 each.

Tomorrow, we'll test the new controllers, and the guests are coming the next day.

So, cheer up, everybody.

Tomorrow's a better day.

Yeah, like, okay, well, I'm going to go

to make food, and I'm sorry again for my compartment.

Uh, that will not happen again.

Um, oh, Anthony, sorry, I had to throw one more tea towel at something.

And Frederick, you were the one.

Because Barbara told me you are mean to me that one time.

I'm so sick of taking the blame.

So

he serves this great lunch now.

And now everybody's like, holy shit, Damo.

I was like, holy shit, this is great.

Probably the best group food we've ever had.

Amazing.

Yeah, they like this.

This now, because he knows it compensates.

He just needed to draw a little bit of blood.

And now he's like back to making amazing

lunches.

So then we have this whole slow-mo, dramatic thing where Kyle goes for some, was that Johnny Walker that he grabbed?

And he starts pouring it in slow motion and then like voices in his head being like,

you're almost fired.

Oh, you're terrible, Kyle.

And like, consequences of your actions.

And he's haunted by it all.

Yeah, it's like as he drinks, we see all of his horrible, horrible thoughts swirling in his mouth.

So then they go to the mimosa lounge, and Kyle is shit-faced already.

He probably went through that whole bottle.

He's got dark eyes, he's squinting, and he stands up and gives a speech.

He's like, it's been a pleasure, an absolute pleasure.

I'm glad I'm still with you guys.

And, you know, sometimes you get away with things in life.

And I'm really, really proud that I got away with this.

I got away with something I wasn't supposed to get away with.

He goes like, get away?

That sounds guilty.

It's like, but I really thought that fucking Frasier would have really, really, you know, done me in.

So here we are all together.

And let's have a drink together.

And Fraser's like, um, excuse me.

What did you mean by that?

He's like, ooh, I didn't mean anything, except that, you know, to Demo, stop pushing me down.

And so Demo's like, um, well, it wasn't Fraser's fault, it was my fault.

And Frasier's now mad.

He's like, you know what?

That's not cool.

It's not cool.

Let me say this in French.

Je naisais pas bonjour auvoir okay je parlais francais boku mais mais vousette on

stupid shitty bitch asshole bonjour auvoir

and then and we see the subtitles and what he what he actually said was god i'm so fat and he storms off

i'm not playing this game and carl's being really mean by the way just the way he says it and he's got this evil look in his eye he's really being an asshole and when he tells them both oh no it's both your fault no carl it's your fault you got shit faced.

You fucked a guest.

And then you told everybody you could possibly tell on national TV.

You're trying to get fired again.

Just quit.

Why do people like this always have to make it everybody else's responsibility to make them fail?

So you can blame everybody else and be the fucking victim in your life.

Stop doing that.

If you want to quit and you want to go be a loser, then do it on your own accord.

Stop making everybody else make these choices for you, sir.

Okay.

If you want to be a loser, go fucking be a loser and stop dragging everybody down with you.

Fraser's already enough of an asshole without having you drag him down more.

And also, again, it's your fault and you're going to pretend like you're what you're what you're really showing is that you don't want to take you don't take accountability.

So everything that you said to Captain Carrey was also bullshit, which means that, you know, last week, your whole thing was that the choice was either that you crossed the line with the guests or you are full of bullshit.

And we thought the bullshit was bad enough that you should be fired.

But now you're also, now you're just compounding the bullshit by lying about being being accountable about the bullshit you said anyway, which we all we think is a lie anyway.

So the point is that you're just like shit.

You're just like garbage.

So like.

Yeah, you're acting like garbage.

You need to cut that shit off.

And Fraser's like, I'm pissed.

If anyone needs to be held accountable, it's stilly.

Now, please, I will not be villainized.

Please get these cameras away, please.

And Jess goes over to him and she's like, yes, please, we don't want cameras anywhere near us on this television show about drama.

Please keep the cameras away.

No, ma'am, you've gotten away with an entire season of fucking people over, and you've gotten an entire charter where you didn't have to do dick except complain about stuff and make out.

You don't get to tell the people who have actually been on their feet working to go away.

That's not your.

That's no.

No, no, no.

You don't get to do that.

So go away.

And, um,

but at the same time, these are the consequences of Garl's actions on Faza.

So please, cameras, go away.

Please, please don't show spoiler like this.

I mean, Fraser like this.

Fraser is a spoiler of himself.

All right, well, that brings us to the end of Below Dick, everybody.

How you feel?

Fabulous.

Thanks, everyone, for being here.

And we'll catch you.

We had a great time.

We'll talk to you next time.

Bye, everybody.

Bye.

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