#2965 Below Deck S12E11 Part 2: Getting Off, Scot Free

31m

This is part 2 of 2

Kyle gets into a pickle, mainly because his pickle gets into a lot of things. Grab some protection because this episode of Below Deck has enough bumping and grinding to require a paternity test. To watch this recap on video, listen to our Love Island bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Listen and follow along

Transcript

Weight loss medications are everywhere right now.

Everyone's talking about them.

Everyone's on them.

But let's be real.

Have you seen the price tag?

It's hard to believe they're actually accessible.

That's where HERS comes in.

HERS is transforming women's health care by providing access to affordable weight loss treatment plans.

They connect you with a medical provider who will work with you to determine the best treatment option for you.

If prescribed, you get medication as part of a doctor-developed weight loss program complete with ongoing care, check-ins, dosage, and medication adjustments.

Weight loss by HERS is realistic, not restrictive, and it's affordable.

HERS provides access to both oral medication kits and GLP-1 injectable options.

Start your free online visit today at forhers.com slash crap ins that's f-o-r-h-e-r-s.com slash crap ins for your personalized weight loss treatment options.

Forhers.com slash crap-ins.

Weight loss by HERS is not available everywhere.

Compounded products are not approved or reviewed for safety, effectiveness, or quality by the FDA.

Prescription required, see website for full details, important safety information, and restrictions.

Actual price depends on product and plan purchase.

We are sponsored by the new movie from Searchlight Pictures, The Roses.

Perfect couple Ivy, Olivia Coleman, and Theo Rose, Benedict Cumberbatch, have it all.

Successful careers, a loving marriage, and great kids.

But when Theo's career comes crashing down, just as Ivy's fame starts to skyrocket, a tinderbox of fierce competition and growing resentment ignites, threatening to destroy everything they've built if they don't destroy each other first.

All's fair when love is war.

For anyone who's ever been in a relationship, The Roses is a crowd-pleasing comedy.

Starring Benedict Cumberbatch, Olivia Coleman, Andy Sandberg, Allison Janney, Shuti Gatwa, and Kate McKinnon.

From the director of Meet the Parents and writer of Poor Things.

Directed by J.

Roach and screenplay by Tony McNamara.

This movie looks absolutely hilarious.

I love Olivia Coleman so much.

I'll see anything she's in, and this one looks like a home run.

In Theaters Everywhere, August 29th.

Get tickets now.

You already know we love Virgin Voyages.

This cruise line is more iconic than Ramona Singer's Runway Walk.

We're talking all-inclusive everything.

Wi-Fi, dining, entertainment, group fitness classes, everything is included.

No hidden fees, no surprise charges.

And unlike most of the Cast of the Valley, all Virgin Voyages trips are 100% kid-free.

No room for loud toys and crying kids to drown out the sounds of the ocean.

The destinations are amazing too.

Some highlights Aruba, St.

Lucia, New York, Miami, Iceland, and a below-deck favorite, The Mid.

Oh my God, the boats are beautiful.

They're so modern.

The rooms are just so luxurious.

I love all the colored lighting in there and the balconies.

I also just love that they are tailored for adult experiences.

That makes me so happy.

Make your next vacation a fabulous one with Virgin Voyages.

Learn more at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor.

Hi everyone, welcome back.

This is part two of a two-part recap.

If you're wondering where part one was, well go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe so that way you always get your episodes.

But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode.

So Rainbow and Demo are now in the jacuzzi with Fraser and they're just like talking and Kyle's like, I'm wet as fuck, I'll tell you that.

And Rainbow's like, that's what she said.

And Kyle's like, it's actually what Helen, it's actually, it's actually Helen and that.

It's Helen Sorry it's actually Helen that I fucked tonight I fucked Helen in the sea right I fucked her in the sea for fuck's sake and Fraser's like what he's like I slipped my dick in

and Rainbow's like dead ass no it was a very alive ass and Fraser's like well wait a second the the husband paid for the tip so That explains it.

So Fraser is going to make it now.

They got a shitty tip because he fucked this guy's wife.

No.

If Frank was mad that he fucked the wife, he would have gotten him fired and not given you any tip that's they're just cheap like i know fraser's gonna make this whole thing like he fucked us all over no what he did was not good but that guy totally would have completely not tipped you they're just cheap fuckers don't let them off the hook for being cheap yeah but i want to say kyle's really gross and it's not only the fucking part you know i mean who cares like i've had plenty of whatever i've had my own sex capades that i'm not going to apologize for so i wouldn't

need him to do that either but dude like at least have some secrecy about it like you a married woman and you get away with it on a charter that should be exciting enough for you but then throwing her under the bus is not cool i didn't i agree i thought that was completely shitty i mean i think she's gross and everything but even gross people deserve some respect I think, yeah, it has nothing to do with her being a gross.

It just is also just unprofessional.

Well, he shouldn't have done it in the first place, but if you're going to do it, don't announce it on TV.

Like, like do you want to have employment opportunities and really what it does is he's in a position now where either he was completely unprofessional and irresponsible or he's a liar and he's making up really bad lies about someone that could really imperil someone's marriage

just to like have a joke so both i think are terrible and i would fire him for both situations quite frequently yeah i think he i think i think that alone is a fireable offense like walking around i actually really do like dissing a guest and all that is not that they don't ever diss a guest but you know what i mean like trying to ruin a guest life is not cool either he could get fired that could really mess things up i think like if he if he was just doing it to be funny then um yeah that's really shitty and i think honestly the way he talked about it in the van the way he's talking about it here i don't see any sense that he's trying to take the piss out of anyone he is full-on bragging there's no just kidding there's no laughter there's no there's no nothing he's like literally saying saying he's like saying yeah he's giving he's actually elaborating in a way that's not like this is funnier and funnier he's just saying it so if he if it is a fabrication he's also showing his ease with just lying so yeah i think he's shitty yeah he's gross and he's like well in all fairness she slipped my dick inside of her

So gross.

So then 24 hours until charter.

It's the next morning.

And they're like, happy birthday.

Oh my God.

Happy birthday, Kyle.

And Kyle's like, thank you, brother.

I'm about to shift my pants though.

Because they showed him before he went to bed just downing large glasses of wine to chugging before he went to bed.

And he wakes up all like methyl,

like all shaky and gross.

He's just gross.

He's sketch and he needs to go.

Yeah.

So then Jess is I just like to think of Barbie's dad sitting at home like taking off another $100,000 off of Barbie's Barbie's inheritance every time there's a Kyle scene.

Yep, seriously.

So Jess goes up to Celine the next day and she goes, you sleep?

She goes, good, thank you.

She's like, okay, I asked Barbara, Barbara, on a date today.

Today?

Yes.

Yes, I did.

She said, yes, surprisingly.

Well,

I mean,

is she saying this to Celine to make Celine jealous?

Or is she saying it to Celine to like make sure it's not awkward?

I think to make sure it's not awkward.

I mean, you should tell somebody, right?

But it seems like they all do this.

They're like, well, I'm doing this with that person.

I'm doing this with that person.

Hope you're not mad.

That seems to be kind of the theme of the season.

So now Kyle and Damo are watching the deck and Kyle's saying he was rude to Selene and he feeled like he was right in what he said, but it was probably too rude.

And Damo's like, well, you can be right and still be a prick.

So he's like, well, I also fucking smashed a girl on the beach and didn't wrap it.

So I'm really worried, worried.

Very, very worried.

And he's like, yeah.

And you also told a lot of people about your, you know,

oh, that Helen slipped it in.

Oh, yeah, she slipped it in.

Yeah, it was good.

So now he's sober-ish.

And still saying the shit the next day.

Yeah.

Still saying it?

Like, like maintain.

Like at this point, why are you still like taking out the piss, right?

So Damos, here comes Deimo's Instagram wall because now it's his tortured past.

He's like, before I joined yachting, one of my friends, he was just manic, like living in a squall.

Like he couldn't keep a train train of thought.

Still, he's reminding me of my old friend.

He's still hurting on the inside.

He's root, he's

having sex with strangers on the beach and in the toilet.

And I believe him.

He's sleeping with the charter guest.

I'm seeing somebody that's crying out for help.

So, yeah, I'm concerned.

Not concerned enough to answer that cry for help, but just concerned enough to sort of stay on the side and maybe undermine him a little bit.

Yeah, I'm concerned enough to try and get him fired.

So,

Fraser goes to talk to Selene at the the bar and she talks about the date.

And he's like, well, I'm here for you.

Don't be upset, gorgeous.

If you ever need a hug, just come to me, old scarecrow Fraser.

Scarecrow McGillicutty.

I'll make sure no bird approaches you while you cry on my straw.

You know, I think now it's Solane gets one.

I mean, it's like rapid succession of like Instagram walls.

Selene's like, I'm hurt.

It's like a truck on my body and like the road and again and again and again.

And like I push away and then I push away Jess.

And I think if I take other decision and to stop kissing Scotty, to stop kissing Demo, maybe me and Jess still be together.

But I push her and I think I really like her because, oh, it is painful, truck, me on road with truck running over.

It is hard.

I was around by truck.

So you're not upset because you like Jess.

You're upset because Jess doesn't like you as much as she she should.

Just like you're upset that Kyle doesn't like you as much as he should.

Just like you're upset that Damla doesn't like you as much as he should.

Just as you're upset that everybody doesn't fucking fall in love with you because you treat everybody like crap and you seem like a nice girl.

I mean, you can't just go around treating people like shit and then crying about it and wondering why they don't like you anymore.

Cause you hurt all their feelings, Elaine.

Okay.

You dummy.

She must have been a disaster on Love Island.

It makes me almost want to watch French Love Island.

Almost.

So Fraser, by the way, when is that reunion?

Is it what in a week or so?

When is the Love Island reunion?

Do you know?

No, I don't know.

No, okay.

So Fraser.

I've forgotten about it.

Like, is that going to happen still?

I think it's too late.

I think they need them to spend like a month outside the villa to watch all the episodes and get mad at each other.

So they come into the reunion all like, I'm stinking hot mad.

So Fraser, I had to delete all my like Reddit things that I was following for Love Island because it's just too much.

And I was just clogging my feet.

And every day it was like, oh my God, you guys, Huda is so offended at how someone took her reaction in episode two.

I'm like, the show's over.

I can't follow along as Huda gets caught up with 18 hours or 36 hours of TV.

Like, I can't.

I really, like, it's been such a, it's been such a dream having this like post-Huda life where I don't have to think about her anymore.

So it's going to be rough having to dive back into that into the reunion.

I mean, love the season, just Huda, too much.

Yeah, yeah, it was a fun show, but you know, it's one of those things that just needs to end.

Yeah, I agree.

Like, the reunion should have been pretty soon.

But anyway, Fraser is,

so now Fraser's still talking to Selene, and he's like, do you think you really like chess?

She's like, normally, I like big, tall man, and he's a baby woman.

She's a baby woman.

Like, who could do drive?

Baby woman drive truck and he's the opposite he's like so what are you doing why haven't you been honest as honest with yourself and with her she's like well because she was scared to like me and now she's okay so i don't know

darling the minute you have someone wrapped around your finger you want attention from other people she's like oh but i'm so disappointed because it's so late it's so late

she doesn't listen to a thing he said because he calls it you know that's pretty obvious she just she doesn't listen so then um demo comes to talk talk to Fraser and he's like, I don't know where to start.

Steely, he's still he's fucking hammered.

And like all the shit he was saying last night, I'm not seeing this fun party boy.

I see like someone in pain.

Let's get him fired.

I know.

All right, we'll deal with this together.

Shall we exchange blowjobs?

And then Fraser's...

Fraser's like, do I, do I think it happened?

Let me turn three quarters of the camera and lean in.

Do I think it happened?

I don't know.

Plausible.

Deniability.

You're surrounded by every single other guest and crew member on a public beach.

It might just have been a slip-in-slip-out situation.

Regardless, that's inappropriate.

It's unacceptable.

It's horrifying.

So now it's time for preference sheet meeting.

All right, Hugo, Hugo, Hugo, preference sheet meeting in the main salon.

I'll see you there in five.

Okay, done, done, done.

So, all right, Rob and Denise and their friends.

they all own restaurants throughout the United States.

Baby back, baby back, baby back.

I want my.

All right, all right.

They own a three-star Michelin restaurant called Jamba Juice.

I don't know if I'm familiar with this.

All right, well, I'm thinking first off the bat, what do we smell?

Pizza!

Money.

No, what do we smell?

Money!

Pizza!

I love Selene going, pizza!

No, it's money, money, Selene.

All right, they want to do some snorkeling.

Let's see what's around that area.

The only thing showing up on my radar is Carl's penis for some reason.

So the primary has requested all black and white formal three-course dinner where his wife will be wearing her original wedding dress.

and rimba goes awhile

and it's the meal can be up to chef and in honor of the primary's 10 year anniversary she would like to jump off the vessel in her wedding dress in hopes that she drowns and dies because she hates her husband that much she hopes to recreate the emotions she felt on her wedding day jumping off the boat I mean, do you know how, is that how you felt on your wedding day?

Divorce the man.

If that's how you feel on your wedding day, don't marry him.

That's a sign.

Your body is trying to tell you something.

And do you know how many people go on cruises and the man throws the wife overboard?

This does not bode well for you two.

Yeah, I don't feel like this.

This is not someone who's happy in her marriage because she's jumping into the salt water with her wedding dress.

She's basically saying, Okay, I would like to ruin this wedding dress.

This is step one in expunging my memories of that dreaded day when I ruined my life.

First, I will destroy the wedding dress in this fashion.

Yeah.

So then they're going to have a birthday surprise for Kyle in the cream ass.

It's a syphilis test.

I know.

So now

Fraser goes to Hugo and they're going to talk very seriously about Kyle.

It's time for a commercial.

It's time for a Krappens commercial.

Why drop a fortune on basics when you don't have to?

Quince has the good stuff.

High quality fabrics, classic fits, and lightweight layers for warm weather, all at prices that make sense.

Quince has closet staples you'll want to reach for over and over, like cozy cashmere, cotton sweaters from just 50 bucks, and comfortable lightweight pants that somehow work for both weekend hangs and dressed-up dinners.

And Quince only works with factories that use safe, ethical, and responsible manufacturing practices and premium fabrics and finishes.

We've been talking about Quince for a long time.

We both love it.

I love online shopping, and Quince is the most fashionable destination I use for sure.

I've got a beautiful suede jacket that I got from Quince.

I get compliments on it every single time I wear it.

I actually currently have a Mongolian Cashmere Henley sweater in my shopping bag, and I'm about to hit purchase as soon as we're done recording this very ad.

Keep it classic and cool with long-lasting staples from Quince.

Go to quince.com/slash crap ins for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

That's q-u-i-n-ce-e.com/slash crappins to get free shipping and 365-day returns.

Quince.com/slash crappins.

Oh, summer is winding down, but you know what?

It's good to get back into a routine.

And I think it's time to refresh my style for the new season.

I'm looking for a lot of new stuff.

I'm always looking for new stuff to refresh my style.

And the best place to do it is where I do it always: Wayfair.

I know Wayfair is exactly where I go for a nice little refresh, whether it's my office, whether it's some dining room stuff.

I love what Wayfair does.

Wayfair is great.

I use it it for the outdoors.

I use it for the indoors.

One of my favorite things about it is I can afford to get stuff from there and get it put together.

So I'm not always having to sit here and put it together.

People actually will come and put this stuff together and it all looks so, so good.

Wayfair makes it easy to tackle your home goals with endless inspiration for every space and budget.

Wayfair's huge selection of outdoor items makes it easy to find exactly what's right for you.

Get organized, refreshed, and back to routine for way less.

Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home.

That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com.

Wayfair, every style, every home.

Searching for a romantic summer getaway, escape with Rich Girl Summer, the new Audible Original from Lily Chu.

The exquisitely talented Philippa Sue returning to narrate her fifth Lily Chu title.

This time, Philippa is joined by her real-life husband, Stephen Pasquale from Rescue Me and American Son.

Set in Toronto's wealthy cottage country, aka the Hamptons of Canada, Rich Girl Summer follows the story of Valerie, a down-on-her-luck event planner posing as a socialite's long-lost daughter while piecing together the secrets surrounding a mysterious family and falling deeper and deeper in love with the impossibly hard-to-read and infuriatingly handsome family assistant, Nico.

Caught between pretending to belong and unexpectedly finding where she truly fits in, Valerie learns her summer is about to get far more complicated than she ever planned.

She's in over her head and head over heels.

Fake heiress, real secrets.

Listen to Rich Girl Summer now on Audible.

Go to audible.com/slash rich girlsummer.

I just got back in town and the last thing I wanted to do was go to the grocery store.

So I did what I always do.

I called my good friend Instacart.

Instacart is more than a grocery technology platform.

It's a care company designed to make life easier.

It connects you to thousands of stores across the U.S., giving you time back to focus on what matters most.

With just a few taps, you can shop from your favorite stores and have fresh groceries and household essentials ready for pickup or delivered to your door in as fast as 30 minutes.

Instacart helps take care of delivering some of the things that you love so that you're free to take care of life.

Instacart brings convenience, quality, and ease right to your door so you can focus on what matters most.

Download the Instacart app and use code CRAPINS20 to get $20 off your first order of $80 or more.

That's code CRAPINS20 to get $20 off your first order of $80 or more.

Offer valid for a limited time, excludes restaurants.

Additional terms apply.

So then Kyle comes for his surprise and everybody's celebrating.

What's he going to do for his 28th year?

And he's like, nothing.

So now, Damo needs a meeting with Fraser as well.

Dun, dun, dun.

So Fraser is saying, listen, the captain's going to find out what happened with Kyle.

And if he finds out that I knew and didn't say anything, that could put my job on the line.

So I don't know what to do.

You should go tattoo on him.

And he's like, I'll do it.

I'll tattle on him.

Yeah.

And Fraser, I mean, Fraser is basically like, you, either you do it or I do it.

He's basically pulling the Gina, the Gina card from last year on Orange County when Gina's like, hey, Katie, remember when I told you to say this thing on camera?

Well, Heather's going to find out about it.

So you better tell Heather.

Otherwise, I'm going to have to tell Heather.

So that's what...

So Damo's like, fine, whatever.

Fuck.

Okay, I will do this.

So Damo goes up to Kyle and he's like, look, there's no other way to say this.

The Helen thing, the primary, you spoke about it with too many people around.

You got to go tell the captain, basically.

So Kyle's like, all right.

Oh, I was just taking the piss out.

I mean, I think it's evident.

Couldn't you tell?

From all my joking, from all the times I silently said, just kidding, to no one but myself

on the inside.

Oh, all that time you were just lying and ruining somebody's reputation for fun on camera?

Oh, that's much better, Kyle.

Yeah.

So he's like, well, it's going back to the cape.

Say the writing's on the wall, mate.

He needs to know.

And he's like, all right, all right, I'll go.

Why did you have to do this on my fucking birthday?

So

he goes,

Dun, dun, dun.

Now, Kyle is like, so Captain, see, now you know me.

I'm a bit of a loudmouther.

I kind of say things without thinking sometimes.

And on the beach yesterday with the primary, we were rather close.

You know, nothing did happen, but I've maybe said things that would suggest that something did happen.

He's looking all shifty and still drunk.

And he's like, well, what did you say happened?

Well, I may have said I slipped it in.

And just the look on Carrie's face was so good.

It just goes to Carrie.

He's like,

really?

You know,

I genuinely didn't but yeah i definitely said that and you know but nothing genuinely happened genuinely nothing happened i can look you in the eye and say nothing happened he's like so the crew now think you banged the tartar guest well that's what demo just came and approached me and said somehow all these people who i said i slipped it in and helen took her up my wiener and put it in her vagina somehow all these people think that i that i actually had sex with her i don't know what happened i was taking the piss out

and it definitely didn't happen well dead set i'm looking you in your eyes Nothing happened at all.

By the way, he's not really able to maintain eye contact.

He's like, look at me in the eye while I tell you this.

Okay, can you see?

Like, why are your eyes going back and forth, bro?

You're not taking an eye test.

Follow the light.

Follow the light.

There's no light, Kyle.

All right.

Well, you know, this boat has a reputation.

A reputation where people who work in insurance and have small restaurants in the United States come on here and get shit facing kicked off and sent to the authorities.

And we have to maintain that reputation.

Yeah.

So Tell, look me in the eye.

Did you do it?

And he's like, oh, I hope you believe me because genuinely nothing did happen.

So I understand your position.

It's like, all right, I'm going to have a chat with the crew now.

So he's like, are you fucking kidding me?

Why would you make up a story like that?

My immediate reaction is, you're full of shit and you're lying, and that's unacceptable.

I need to investigate this further.

Get out me one-eyed,

get out my one-eyed magnifying glass.

Go into town now listen I need to make sure that you're not lying because if this imperils our ability to bring on porn stars onto this vessel we're gonna have another thing coming

So now cabins are being divvied up work goes ahead, but now Hugo Damo Fraser and Rainbow are all brought to speak about Kyle separately and it's like an interview process on a law and order, you know?

So how's it been the last few days Damon's like well um still he's been great uh he's really good my highlights have been doing well my curls feel actually

stick to Kyle apparently he's been saying he banged the primary

and they all kind of cover for him honestly Fraser's like you know I heard about it last night and I don't particularly believe it which is a lie because you 100% last night were saying he's the reason why we have a low tip and then Rainbow's like um I kind of brushed it off as him being drunk and like, just like talking guck.

And then Carrie, and then Damo's like, well, you know, at the bite, Helen was requesting him to go underwater with her and hold her up.

And he was doing that.

And she was just topless.

And, but there was like, always like two or three other guests around him.

So I don't think it really happened.

Like, you guys all know what happened.

Stop saying this.

You were sure to get the, he was holding her topless in there.

Fucking Damo.

A little underminer.

And Rainbow, not that Kyle really deserves much more, but still, like, if that's supposed to be your bro.

And then Rainbow's like, but they were very close.

So I will add that.

And he goes, like, I mean, I didn't even give it the time of day.

I thought it was a drunken chat, but I'll keep my eye on him

and probably get hard because he's very sexual.

So then Selene and Barbara are working on cabins.

And Selene's like what happened with Scottish.

And she's like, I don't know if I believe it, but, you know, he's not stupid.

So maybe he didn't do.

It's pretty stupid.

I think he's pretty stupid.

yeah he's pretty stupid you're judging by love island standards yeah and so now kyle is sulking in his cabin and and demo's like it's my fault i was talking to fraser about it earlier it's my fault and kyle's like no i mean i shouldn't say shit like that i was just taking the piss i was taking the piss as was evident by the fact that i kept saying it over and over again until i got caught So then he goes checking in on Jess about this whole thing and Jess is like, some people do not have that common sense.

People who get away with shit, they love that feeling.

Anyway, I'm going to go make out with Barbara to get Celine jealous of him.

I was going to say, you would know.

So

Hugo hopes that he's professional enough not to do it, but

I hope he didn't.

And

that's not the kind of professional environment I would like to be in either.

Okay, Hugo.

I love Hugo's like, I'm quitting.

I'm quitting if he got it in.

So then we go to...

Hugo doesn't want to have that sort of professional environment and yet did nothing to uh step in once he heard any of this was happening until he was summoned by the captain yeah i mean at the very least say bro even if that's true you need to shut up or you're gonna get fired you know yeah something

so jess and barbara are talking about it

and now they are heading out for their date so now they're talking about jess is like did you speak with so so that's like why are we starting out the date talking about fucking solane come on

Barbara's like, well, I know she wasn't okay because you know it wasn't very nice.

And like, you cannot go around saying to everyone that you don't care.

Like, you don't feel it as you don't.

Like, you don't do anything if you don't feel it now.

Like, and then you do.

And then you cannot go in people's lives and fuck every fuck up with everything.

How could I believe if you just say those things?

It's not nice.

It's not nice.

Oh, I understand because Fraser explained to me that my actions were not following what my words were saying.

So I understand now that if I say something, I have to do that thing.

Crazy.

crazy.

I didn't want it to be a thing, I just wanted it to be casual because I was, you know, she never spoken to me about her feelings.

And the only time she was ever interested in me was when I was going for you, which was what I was doing, so that way she'd be interested in me.

And that's what pissed me off.

And then I got cut off, and we laugh and we have fun and whatever.

But, like, something wasn't like there with her, you know.

And that something is curly bangs.

I love those.

I I don't know.

From what we saw, Jess, you finally got sex with Solane and then immediately dumped her, even though Selene was like kind of in with you at that point.

So

wow, you're out assholing Solane.

That's actually impressive.

It's impressive to see.

I've got to give her, I've got to give her credit.

So then she's like, you know, and then I spoke with Fraser and he explained what I did.

And so Barbara says, okay,

I have to ask you something why do you think you're like

why do you think you like me what is she saying like why do you think you like me why do you think you're not like me but like it's just like to say why like why do you what I think she's saying why do you like me But she's saying why do you not like me?

Why do you like me now?

And she's

saying I think she's saying not like me But like why now are you like is this happening and Jess is like when the pressure came off of me and you I was like ah and then Fraser said you should like Barbara and I said I should and I saw you and I was like okay

should I like you and then Fraser was like yes keep going you're almost there and I think I got there I think I like you I saw you fixing a bike bicycle wheel on your Instagram wall that's a shit answer she goes okay well let's just drink instead so they do

it's like a chemistry free date It's so bad.

I think Jess looks like a loser.

I'm like, oh, I'm so glad that Barbara's above this.

But then they go back in bed.

They go back and Barbara's in her bed.

And Jess is like, can I cuddle with you?

And Barbara's like, well, if you want to get in, you can get in.

Like, first of all, lesbian, go on one date, cuddle forever.

So, sure.

She said, can our cat come in too?

Yes, we did adopt a cat on the way home.

So yes, bring her into the bed.

Meanwhile, Selene is sleeping in the bunk above them.

Like, hello.

Geez.

Why are you not cuddling in Jess's bed?

Like, this is so obnoxious.

Yeah.

So then

she goes back to her room in the next morning, and Rainbow's like, Where do you sleep?

And she goes, You slept in Barbara's bed.

She goes, Oh, she's a good cuddler, though, so I'm not gonna lie about it.

I just like Rainbow's slow realization that she was trying to gain acceptance from a bunch of really obnoxious people.

She's like, you know what?

Never mind.

Yeah, so the frazer finds out what's going on, and he's like, Oh, God, you guys slept together in the cabin.

Oh, geez.

So then, Kyle and Carrie, done, done, done.

kyle's like vaping in the bathroom he's like oh my god how this works out it's like you're lucky captain sandy's not here oh yeah seriously he's like so how's it going i mean it's nicotine not it's nicotine not weed but still she'd be like how dare you marry time is on her way maritime law you violated maritime's law

well i could be better Everyone I've spoken to seems to think you're full of shit.

That you were just talking shit.

It's like, yeah, of course I am.

I'm very full of shit, yeah.

Well, did you do it?

I definitely didn't do it.

100%.

Dead straight.

No, I did not do it, Cap.

I was just taking out the piss.

Taking out the piss by sticking my dick in Helen.

Taking out the piss again.

That was taking out the piss right away.

All right, well, with the evidence I have, I can't do anything except let you stay because boats are run on hard evidence and lawyers.

All right.

You had Marisca Hogatai in here.

She cleared you.

So

you got to go.

Don't don't.

I mean, you can stay.

Don't don't.

I changed my mind there.

All right.

Now, listen,

I want you to stay,

but put your head in.

Put your head in.

It's like,

actually, you know what?

I'm going to actually rephrase that because I'm pretty sure that's what goes into this mess.

All right.

Now, I just want you to promise that from now on, you're going to come clean.

All right.

God damn.

That's another bad way to put it.

So I don't want you to close.

I don't want you that close to guess anymore.

It's like, fair enough.

You got to draw a line.

That's good.

I love to draw.

I've got a pad right here.

So it's a metaphor.

All right.

It's a metaphor.

All right.

As we've learned on this here channel, from now on, close your legs to married men.

Do you understand?

All right, Captain.

So he's all excited.

He's like, oh, God, I did it.

I did it.

I'm free.

I'm free like a bird.

He's like skipping out of there like, yes.

And

he's, you know, basically psyched that he gets to stay.

I can't believe he got to stay.

I think he should have been fired.

I was fucking crazy.

I was shocked.

So basically at the end of the episode, we see Kyle sitting in

the interview, and the producer says, so can you tell the truth?

Did it happen?

And Kyle's like,

was it a joke?

Or not?

Well, give Helen a call.

I was like, see, you being coy about it makes me mad because if you were taking the piss out you should really be like it was a joke it was all a joke but him being coy is like either they didn't have sex but he's still going to like relish like revel in this moment where he gets this attention at the at the cost of helen's potential marriage or he did do it and then he lied and got away with it which is also uncool like he's garbage don't like him anymore and he's a tattletale with Helen.

So he's kind of a piece of shit either way here.

I just looked up to see if Helen has responded.

I haven't seen anything yet, but I hope she does because this is bullshit.

He went on, watch what happens last night.

And of course, Andy loves this shit, you know?

So he's like, oh my God, you stuck it in.

He's like, I'm not going to answer that.

But he was talking about how he wants to be in porn.

And Fraser was like, oh, yes, I told him he should have an OnlyFans.

And he's like, no, you know, if I'm going to do an OnlyFans, I don't want to do it just right on the back of all of this fame and you know oh it's just doing it because it was on tv no i want to have an actual porn career you know really get in the industry and someone in the audience couldn't stop giggling they're you

but i guess he's like into you know he wants to be like an actual porn star now and then he's like

talk to bruno you know bruno did it And actually in season one, there was a guy who was a porn star who came onto Blow Deck, but Bruno went from Below Deck to porn.

So, you know, Kyle, there is a hook for you.

Yeah, it's a road that's been hoed.

So feel free to, feel, feel free to ride down it, you know?

Well, fun times, fun episode.

And thanks everyone for being here.

And let us know if you think they did it or they didn't do it.

Leave a comment on our Instagram at WatchWork Crappins.

And we will talk to you on the next episode.

Bye, everyone.

Watch What Crapins would like to thank its premium sponsors.

Ain't no thing like Allison King.

It's always a party on Allison Block.

Our way is the Amber Way.

It's the Foster and the Furious.

It's Amanda Foster.

It's always automatic with Ashley Otto.

Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt.

She's not just a Sheila.

She's a Daniella.

Itchles.

We never miss her call.

It's Diane Call.

Aaron McNicholas, she don't miss no tricholist.

Hava Nagila Weber.

You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones.

I go, Hugo, we all go for Hugo.

Jamie, she has no less namie.

She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer.

Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch.

She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

Kristen the Piston Anderson.

Get a B in your bonnet with Lacey B.

K-Syra, Syrah, whatever will be, will Lauren Sills be.

Bringing the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett.

She gets a name from us, it's Lindsay D.

Let's give a kiss a Reno to Lisa Lino.

Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry.

We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox.

Megan Berg.

You can't have a burger without the berg.

This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian.

I love a ya Olivia Williamson.

Tastier than Flanderson.

It's Rachel Manderson.

She sure is swell.

It's Raquel.

Yes, we canna.

It's Sedana.

Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman.

Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

Darn Skippy, it's Tippy.

And our super premium sponsors.

She's V V I P, it's Amanda V.

Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.

We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva.

Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neal.

Don't get salty with Christine Pepper.

Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides.

Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland.

Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs.

It's our queen.

It's Queen Laifa.

Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall.

Hail the Cork Master, the Master of the Cork, Jennifer Corcoran.

We got our wish.

It's Jen Plish.

She's not harsh.

She's Jill Hirsch.

My favorite Murdoch, Karen McMurdo.

We love him madly.

It's Kyle Pod Shadley.

In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock.

G, it's Lisa H.

We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder-Baron.

She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthe.

Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani.

The incredible edible Matthew Sisters.

She eases our woes.

It's Melissa St.

Rose.

There's a chance of meatballs.

It's Rebecca Cloud.

Meet, it's Ronit Feldman.

She's the Queen Bee.

It's Sarah Lemke.

We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Telefson.

Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony.

Please don't stop.

It's Solian Pop.

Let's take off with Tam Laplain.

It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo.

She ain't no shrinking Violet Koutar.

We love you guys.

If you like Watch What Crappens, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondry.com slash survey.

It's your man, Nick Cannon, and I'm here to bring you my new podcast, Nick Cannon at Night.

I've heard y'all been needing some advice in the love department.

So who better to help than yours truly?

Nah, I'm serious.

Every week, I'm bringing out some of my celebrity friends and the best experts in the business to answer your most intimate relationship questions.

Having problems with your man?

We got you.

Catching feelings for your sneaky link?

Let's Let's make sure it's the real deal first.

Ready to bring toys into the bedroom?

Let's talk about it.

Consider this a non-judgment zone to ask your questions when it comes to sex and modern dating in relationships, friendships, situationships, and everything in between.

It's going to be sexy, freaky, messy, and you know what?

You'll just have to watch the show.

So don't be shy.

Join the conversation and head over to YouTube to watch Nick Cannon at night or subscribe on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcast.

Want to watch episodes early and ad-free?

Join Wondery Plus right now.