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Well, hello, and welcome to Watch What Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that that we just love to talk about.

I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the glorious and beautiful Ronnie Carolem Hi.

Hi, Ronker.

Thank you.

Hello.

How are you?

Just dandy.

We're here.

We're queer.

And it's Friday.

It's Orange County Day.

And actually, I would say it's not just Orange County Day.

It is Gretchen Rossi, like super Fox News hair day because she really took it to the next level.

She is like ready to take over Fox Friends with that hair.

Like that is she, and you know what?

God bless.

God bless that white, platinum, white anchor lady hair that she's got.

Today we are talking Orange County.

We have a wonderful Patreon that you can join where we have bonus episodes.

And this week we talked on our bonus episode about Project Runway and Big Brother and the naked gun and a baby shower and I think maybe something else.

I don't remember.

But we had a lot of fun just chatting it up.

So there is that.

We do a weekly bonus episode.

We do things like trailer trashes where we make fun of trailers for upcoming shows and Salt Lake City feels like it's right around the corner.

So keep an eye out for that, et cetera.

Also, Crap is on demand where you can watch us, not just listen.

We have a video component to this podcast and it is there on Patreon.

And then a week after they go onto YouTube, you know, for your fresh content, go to Patreon and a lovely Discord channel as well.

And then on Monday, we have Crappy Hour.

That's at 5.30, where we talk about Bravo gossip, etc.

And then you guys get a chance to hop on and chat with us and air whatever is on your mind.

That's at 5.30 Western, 8.30 Eastern.

And we are going to alternate Mondays, Crappy Hour, and Amazon Lives.

So it's going to be a super, super fun Monday, always, for the rest of eternity.

Ronnie, what's going on with you?

You know, it's fitting that Gretchen showed up in her extreme Fox News hair because she is finally getting some pushback for her social media posting this week.

Have you been reading any of the Gretchen news?

Shockingly, I have.

What a dick.

What a dick.

What happened now?

What did our, I was just about to say, I'm really enjoying Gretchen this season.

I was just about to do a whole thing of like, you know what?

I'm really happy that Gretchen's back.

I think she's doing a great job.

But now what?

Before.

Well, that's why I'm opening with this.

So you don't fall into too deep of a hole.

Because why would it have to be

going to come in and fangirl over this chick?

Well, one of them is...

She and Jen Pedranti made some like video doing Asian voices and making squinty eyes and stuff.

And Katie Janella went on,

Katie Janella went on virtual reality with the boys and was talking about that not being cool.

And then right after that, someone finally went through Gretchen's social media, which, you know, I've mentioned a couple of times is horrifying.

I was not glad she was coming back at all because listen, I know that there are people from all over the political spectrum here.

I'm not here to get into like Trumpy this, Trumpy that, you know, not that I've never been guilty of that, but

You know, it's not only that.

It's not only a political thing.

Like she's got transphobic.

She's just a transphobic, homo, homose,

homosexual, homosexual, homophobic racist.

Someone from Orange County has these qualities.

Yes, but at least, you know, as they always say to us, keep it in your bedroom.

I don't need to hear it.

Like, if that's your thought, then you do that at home.

I don't need to hear this shit.

Like, I don't need you.

So here's some screenshots that she's been liking.

This was compiled, I believe, by Bambi4183 over on the Insta.

But here's just an example.

When you open the door to homosexuality, you open the door to pedophilia.

You'll never win by normalizing perversion.

That's a Gretchen line.

Gretchen?

Gretchen Rossi?

Yes.

Gretchen

is...

She didn't write these.

She's liking these.

Then another one says,

sin is a slippery slope.

If you think it's bad now, give it a couple of years.

If you want to save the kids, start by calling homosexuality what it is.

And then this

mixed with her racist ass post that she actually made.

Fuck off, Gretchen.

Like, seriously, go back to the fucking rock you crawled under.

What a horrible, horrible, disgusting human being.

And also, keep kicking Tamara's ass while you're here.

I mean, if you're going to be here, keep doing what you're doing,

but also fuck off.

Yeah.

Gretchen, who

probably has like several gay men on her team, you know,

forming that Megan Kelly tribute on her her head is like still going to like all these homophobic things.

That's just, I mean, I'm always, I'm always so shocked when homophobes go on to Bravo.

I'm like, do you know, like,

like, it's either like you are biting the hand that feeds you or you're selling out your own views, you know, just to get some money.

So either way, you're a shitty person.

I mean, what, I guess.

Well, also just going off and like going off on quote unquote perversion.

So I guess, you know, the only kind of perversion you like is young chicks selling themselves to old rich men like that's okay with you off gretchen get off your fucking your your fucking toadstool okay sick of hearing you

keep kicking tamara's ass you're doing great

so we open with um yeah start this friday with a nice strong i was like okay

here we yeah here we go here we go we're gonna have a fun episode so uh we start with jeannie

listen you can say fuck off to somebody and still have a fun episode, but, you know, I felt like it was an easy way to get away from the

business.

I don't want to wait.

She needs to fuck all the way off.

She needs to fuck all the way off.

There's no room for like that sort of hateful language and

thought process, I think, in 2025 in general.

And if you are liking those posts, you can fuck off too.

How about that?

So Gina is saying,

oh my God,

can you put Clean Latifah in the garage?

She's asking

Trevor, Travis, whatever his name is, to do this because she's getting ready for a big party and she has a room, but that she's named Clean Latifah.

And she's like, that's not the vibe that I'm going for.

Yeah, then you're not the vibe I'm going for.

I'm really going for more of a like, you know, cardboard box type, like the furniture is some chairs.

You know what I'm saying?

Get Queen Latifah out of here.

Yeah.

So then Shannon's in glam getting ready.

And she's like, well, I will be regifting a candle that Earl de Pearl gave me.

Apparently, it is the scent of a lake, which I

am still refusing to let into my life.

So, I'm going to give Gina a lake, a lake candle.

And apparently, it will automatically extinguish itself if a hurricane is coming for it.

It's got an adorable name.

It is called You Didn't Comfort Me When a Hurricane Was Ravaging My Home.

Gina's gonna love this.

It smells like not vegetables.

So

then Ryan, we go over to Jen's house, and Ryan is coming down, hobbling down the staircase because his knee and everything.

And he's showing Jen a dress.

And then we see Gretchen and Glam.

She's like, oh, well, my friend is going to be there, Tamara.

And Slay's like, Are you talking about Captain Evil?

Gosh, I don't know why his stand-up career never really took off.

Because it's crazy, isn't it?

God, how is he not still a hilarious DJ on the radio?

How?

So back to Gina.

She's like, oh my God, it looks so good in here.

Oh, ding-dong, ding-dong, ding-dong.

That's definitely Emily because she likes ding-dongs a lot.

We're like hilarious like that.

We're like Lucy and Apple of Ding-dongs.

So

Emily wows.

Yeah, because she is like hitting.

She's doing that thing where she's like ding-donging a lot because like that's Emily's humor is that like her her joke style is that she acts like a

six-year-old, right?

Like, she has, she has food dangling out of her mouth.

She has the drawer bell lots of times.

Like, isn't this funny?

Regressive, regressive.

So, yeah, she's there.

And people start showing up.

And everyone's just so impressed that Gina has more than 300 square feet now.

They're like, oh, wow.

Look at all this.

You have, you have, you have an open concept, but not because it was forced that way.

There's like, it's actually, it's an open concept that's not just four walls.

It's not like a Monica open concept.

It's like you actually have multiple rooms where you could have had walls and you don't have walls, as opposed to all the furniture in just one small room.

As opposed to a studio apartment.

It's like, wow, what an open concept.

And it's not a park.

Wow.

This is, I love that this house is like the opposite of a Gretchen.

It's an open concept.

So the Gretchen comes, like, oh my God, Gina, the house is so pretty.

And they take a tour, which, you know, is two rooms.

And so we see the kids' rooms and stuff.

And then there's a container in the laundry room that says, check your pockets.

Like, just, you know, there was a time when we would clock Gina for her decor.

And I think that when she lived in her small home, she didn't have room for her decor.

And now that she's in a larger house again, the decor is back.

I mean, the little like, check your pockets.

She loves some word art.

That's Gina's thing.

It's always been a thing.

Kitchen.

Buy a place.

She's acting like she's.

I want to make Gina some word art.

We should make some merch that just says in merch art font.

I feel so bad.

I feel bad.

I feel bad.

She would make a great TSA agent, like, check your pockets.

She puts it up there.

It just has like a sign up that says, security.

Welcome.

Live, laugh, screening.

This is a visual interpretation of how much she's grown.

And yes, I'm referring to the check your pockets sign.

She really deserves this.

Yeah, I don't know what.

Check your pockets before you leave the house and make sure you haven't been pickpocketed by one of these poor children.

Really hungry here.

This is a visual interpretation of how much she's grown and then i wrote and how much work she's put into her beach i'm pretty sure that was a typo on my part what did i mean by how much work she's put into her beach

the idea of gina even having anything close to private beach is hilarious i don't know what that's all about so gina like um telling she made a bunch of food because she caters all my parties she's the one who did the bull party do you guys remember that it's the one that i catered from inside my house while you guys were on a ball because that wasn't feeling good

Of course, I remember that party because that's when they went on a tiny little boat and Heather came up the stairs and reached what was clearly there was no more to the boat.

And she goes, Is there another?

Is there another floor?

Is there another floor to this yacht?

I mean, look up, Heather.

There's no more Urana Gina yacht.

There's one floor and one floor only.

So, did Jen get to go meet Tamara?

And Jen did have lunch with Tamara.

It started with the whole thing, I'm obsessed with her thing, just oh god.

Yeah, I'm like a single white female, um, and I've taken photos of her to go to the doctor to look like her.

That's what she's saying.

And Gina's like, Oh, actually, Heather told me Tamara pulled out her phone and she pulled out like this formal fatty photo of Jen.

And by the way, a fanny photo-that's what we're saying today.

Everybody's saying we're gonna say

fanny photo like 20 today.

Okay, it was like a fanny photo.

2024, Emily, I can't, you know, when I had to wear this size, it just reminded me that I just am different than everyone else.

That's really hard.

2025, Fanny Voto.

There's a fatty photo.

Oh my God.

I'm like, look at Fanny.

Look at the fatty photo.

Oh my God.

She's like a fatty photo, bitch.

Why would she show my fatty photo?

What's Tamara's point?

What is her point?

This is ridiculous.

How do you cry about this low point point you're pointing in?

This low point you're in, and you're going to therapy, and you're still finding time to find a fatty photo of me?

I mean, it's a fatty photo.

Um, I have a question.

Was the photo a picture of a fat you, or was the photo itself fat?

Was it like thick stalk?

It's like, no, Gina, that's not the point.

I have lots of fat photos of Tamara would like them.

Actually, I post them.

I don't care.

Oh, oh, Emily doesn't care.

Really?

Because last year you had a season-long breakdown because somebody gave you jeans that were not as small as everyone else's jeans.

Someone gave you the size of jeans that you wear and you literally had a breakdown about it all season.

But now everyone's just supposed to be calm about it because your buddy Tamara did it.

You fucking hypocrite, Emily.

Oh, my God.

Ding-dong, ding-dong, ding-dong.

Hello.

I am here.

It's television's Heather DeBrow, and I have arrived with a housewarming gift.

I hear there's talk about fatty photos.

So to celebrate, I have brought you an ice cream machine.

And by me saying I brought you an ice cream machine, I have brought Alfredo here.

Alfredo, bring in the ice cream machine.

Thank you.

You can just put it on one of the poor stools here.

Put it somewhere a fat person can find it.

If we've also brought a ring light, so that way you can take your fatty photo with the thing that's making you a fatty photo, the ice cream machine.

Enjoy!

I was just in Paris for two days, which made me think of ice cream.

They love it there.

Somehow they don't gain any weight.

Isn't that amazing?

Sorry, Jen.

Is it too soon?

You know about the fatty photo?

Why are we talking about the fatty photo?

There is no one on this cast who is going to use that ice cream machine.

Not a single one.

Well, first of all, the only one who would would be Gina, but she, well, she just, her problem is that she won't understand how to, how to work it.

She'll be putting like

masking tape and the staple money or something.

Canned Ragu in there and shit.

whatever she finds in the check your pockets bin

guys my ragu ice cream didn't work out i feel bad i broke the ice cream machine

so uh tamara is then tamara arrives

and she is you know obviously very sad uh because she's like you know the situation with teddy and she's like after my fat with jen My session anxiety is heightened.

I'm expecting someone to come after me at every given moment.

I checked once.

I've checked twice.

And all my former fatty photos are still safe.

But I don't know what's going to happen next.

Who's going to reveal my fatty photos?

I'm terrified coming to this party.

Everybody's just so mean to me.

It's so rough going in places where people might confront me about things I said about them.

Terrible, terrible life I'm leading.

So Gretchen's like, um, we don't have to say hi to her, do we?

Like, this is so awkward.

And so.

Should we be a gay person, just ignore her?

So Gretchen's.

Can we just treat her like a trans person and eradicate her?

That would be great.

I love Gretchen being anti-trans when she is the one who is transitioned the most on TV from a human face to...

basically an inks, an ink spot.

I mean, that lady.

She's detransitioned.

Maybe that's why she wants everybody to detransition.

It doesn't mean erasing your nose, Tam, or Gretchen.

Gretchen is the one who knows the most about what it's like to transition because she's the one who has actually erased everything on her face.

Am I being problematic right now?

I can't tell.

I'm just trying to diss Gretchen, okay?

I'm just trying to diss her, guys.

I think it got out of hand.

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So she's like, I don't want to say hi.

So all the women gather on the sofa and it is really awkward because Tamara, you know, Tamara brings in this energy that's like,

you're the one who fucked with everybody.

And now you're going to come in here and try and get pity off somebody else's cancer.

This is so fucking Tamra.

It's, it's like, okay, I don't have my own cancer storyline.

So I'm going to steal someone else's from a different show because I've been an asshole all season.

Like, okay, Tamra.

Also, congratulations on this on your sudden onset social anxiety, which has never existed until this scene.

I'm like, I have such social anxiety, which is, of course, why I went on a very calming show like The Traders.

So

Gretchen is like, Okay, well, um, Gina, what's your favorite part of the house?

And she's like, Well, it's really nice to have a pantry.

That's where, like, dreams come true.

That's what I always say to Alfredo.

I say, go into the pantry, your dreams will come true in there.

Yeah, the pantry and also like I did on my drawers.

And she goes, Oh, wait, you say drawers, not drawers.

Is that you?

Typical ice cream lover.

I told you it would be the perfect place to drop that thing.

I love how hyper-regional your New York accent is, unlike mine, which I've erased thanks to the Syracuse College School of Performing Arts.

We had accent training, something that unfortunately Wendy Malik never did.

I think we all remember when she tried to play an Italian nursemaid in that feature film called...

Italian Nursemaids.

It was a terrible film.

I don't know.

Did anyone see it?

Fairy on the nose.

Fairy on the nose, which is which is what the Gina's uh raku sauce is currently on her nose after she tried to put it in my ice cream machine.

I'm gonna stop talking now.

Gina, what's your favorite?

Oh, no, sorry.

I already did that.

So Shannon comes and she's like, Papa, Gina, I've brought you my tagline in a bowl.

There's lemons in a bowl.

There's soap.

You're welcome.

So this is so nice, Gina.

Wow.

So this is the entryway to the

house.

Oh, well,

it is.

There are walls here.

So that's good.

Wow.

Room for a sofa and a dining room table.

Wow.

This is, you've really come up in the world.

Very, very, very nice.

Does this dining room table transition into a bunk bed or where the kids sleep?

Have rooms.

Oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh.

I think I'm going to like it here.

Do, do, do, do, do, do.

What am I going to manage?

Am I in a mansion?

What is this?

The lullaby of Broadway.

I mean, luxury everywhere.

So, Gina's like, I'm like really underwhelmed by Shannon's response.

Oh, it's nice.

All she has to say is it's nice.

Yeah,

that's all she's going to say because last time she ever said anything about your house, you started a feud with her for an entire season.

I can't believe Shannon was so mean about my house.

Remember that?

Yes.

So, and she's going to do it again because this is how she.

Yeah, and then when you walked into my house, all you said was it was nice.

Like, you didn't even congratulate me on like everything I accomplished.

Because it's nothing more than that, Gina.

It's just a perfectly nice standard house.

That's it.

It's nice.

It's a very nice.

It's a nice house.

I mean, we give her shit.

It's a nice house, but that's all you get.

Okay.

It's a very nice house.

Non-bravo.

We see much nicer houses.

It's a now.

It's a house who prepared.

So Tamara can't eat today.

She's like, I can't eat today guys i'm just thinking about teddy's tumor news so we talk about teddy's cancer and stuff and she says that they were in new orleans two weeks ago going to the super bowl and teddy fell down the stairs and they were like marble stairs they were marble stairs and um

finally teddy was feeling better i don't know why that why that why that attention but

she's like i just want

upstairs the worst days which meant it was spritz for me

no momentum fell downstairs there were marble stairs And there were marbles on the stairs.

Which we thought that's why she fell down.

But that's not why.

So

she's, Tamara was sad because, is sad because Teddy was finally feeling like herself.

And now she's got to go into treatment.

Okay, now I'm going to say this.

This is where I got annoyed.

Well, one of the many different places, and I'm in a constant state of being annoyed.

But, you know.

We've obviously over the years given Teddy so much shit, like endless shit.

But one thing that I think that we probably both would believe would be that, like, I'm sure Teddy hates that Tamara's going on the show and acting more dramatic than Teddy herself is acting.

Because Teddy's whole vibe is like, I got cancer.

Hi, I'm Teddy.

I got cancer.

I'm moving on.

Like, that's been her vibe, I think, which I think is actually really cool.

But I feel like Tamra.

Except when she goes on our podcast and lists all the people who haven't reached out enough.

But go ahead.

But yeah, for the most part, why not?

You know what?

Actually, I'm going to say, why not?

That's when you have the right, for sure.

You have the right.

You have to get right to get petty about who's been texting.

Play that card.

But Tamra, like, look, I'm not going to take away that it's like a mo, it's distressing.

One of your best friends has cancer and has tumors.

Of course, of course.

That's so distressing.

But there's kind of a feeling of like, Teddy's being strong right now.

Like, how about you be strong with her rather than like,

because she's kind of, I think, painting Teddy as

in a way that I don't think Teddy seems to be wanting to be painted at the moment.

So it kind of rubbed me the wrong way that Tamara was, as you said,

it felt more like Tamara was squeezing this out for pity as opposed to truly honoring the vibe that Teddy.

Right.

It gets sad.

And if you bring that up with your friends and you're like, you know, my best friend has got cancer and it's horrible and everything she's going through is bumming me out.

And of course, people are going to be, that's understandable.

And of course, your friends are going to support you.

It's just that Tamara is doing this because she knows she's in trouble.

And this is always, she always finds something to bring up.

Yeah, it's like she's trying to use the victim cloak and it's not even hers.

It's somebody else's, you know?

And it's just gross.

It's annoying.

So

she's using someone else's victim cloak and that person themselves doesn't seem to even be using it, you know?

Right.

So it's like, yeah, she left a chair and Tamara picked it right up and put it on.

Like, I'll wear that.

You're not going to use it.

I'll use it.

It's like someone rented a car and then.

Tamara went and took the car and started driving it like it was her own.

It's like, no, it's not your car to drive.

And it's not even my car to drive.

What are you doing?

So Jen and Shannon are outside with,

I don't know who.

And Gina's like, oh, by the way, I'm Gina.

So I'm here to release that some shit.

She's, oh, no, Jen's like, Gina says that she thinks there's a fat photo going around.

And Emily's like, oh, well, you're the one who knows.

I mean, apparently Tamara had photos of Jen before, right, Heather?

And Heather's like, oh, it was one.

It was one.

It was one.

One.

One photo.

One photo.

Crushing breath of photo.

It was disgusting.

disgusting it was some fat lady so we put it in the ice cream machine and hoped it would go away forever

we put it under the ice cream spout and just let alfredo pour all the fatty things all over it

fun fact alfredo went and made an ice cream out of alfredo sauce it was so meta

We said the fatty lady in the photo would probably call it a milkshake.

We decided this year for Halloween, we're going to put up the the picture of the fat lady on the window and scare all the children.

What was the point of the photo?

To show that there was a fatty photo.

That was the point.

There was a fat person.

It's in the name of the photo.

It's a fatty photo.

To show there are very scary photos in the world.

To explain that you need different style of lenses for different styles of people.

Fisheye.

So.

Wide lens.

It was

demonstrating.

IMAX.

The difference between

it was to demonstrate the difference between poor people, fat, and rich people, skinny.

That's it.

Well, I don't get the point of it.

And she goes, well, you know what?

She said, look at this photo.

She looks so different.

And I said, she looks cute.

And I made it all caps and elongated cute to make it sound fatter.

It's like when you see a fat baby, you say, oh, so cute, because you know

they will naturally lose that fat.

So you

find that process cute.

Yeah.

So she showed you my fatty photo to be kind?

No, no, no.

It was more like you want to be her.

Meaning, in case nobody understands what that meant, she meant like you were coming to the gym and you wanted to do a fitness thing with her and you spell it out from another person's view and you can kind of see what she's and she's like wait a minute.

Wait, Heather, Heather, what?

Heather, Heather.

No, no, no, no, no.

Look, it's not my fight.

It's not my fight.

I'm just telling you what she said.

But you're about to tell me that you could see it from her perspective.

Not her perspective, from one's perspective, which is obscured by the fat person in the photo.

You know, all I'm saying is there's two sides to everything.

And sometimes they're both on one person, which creates a fatty photo.

I'm gonna have so many nightmares tonight.

So

Jen says, you know, she's like, you know, no, Heather's always gonna go back for Tamara because she's scared of her.

That's the problem.

Look, there's two sides to everything.

You, no, you, Heather, you were bamboozled.

I'm not familiar.

I don't understand that.

Jen's just so funny indignant to me.

It's cracking the other.

She's like, Heather, you have been bamboozled.

She's like, nope, not my fight.

But you were about to say you could see it well okay okay fine and Sham Shanna's like well I don't think Tamara does anything innocently and Heather supporting Tamara right now is just hurting her and that is my opinion if you get it that's a jump from Tanny so it's a big thing the taglines for me today so yeah I

did that bit with Earl and he just he just stared at me and told me that his former stepson uh still hasn't visited.

And I thought, well, you're really taking the wind out of my sails.

And he said, don't talk about wind because there's a hurricane coming to my house.

I said, I can't really seem to do anything right.

And he said, you really can't.

And it's been tough.

It's been tough.

But we went on another date after that.

And Jim says again, Heather, you are bamboozled.

That is fucked up.

You don't do that to another woman.

Well, you can if they're fatty.

I'm just.

Hey, hey, so what do you guys think?

They're just like, you guys think they're just talking shit about me out there?

Huh?

What do you think?

Because one group is inside, one group's outside.

And Gina's like, well, every group that you're not in is talking shit about you.

That's why when we're not in one group, I feel me.

So back to Heather.

She's like, so you are upset.

I didn't say that's fucked up.

Well, I don't think it was presented that way.

I think I was very non-committal about the whole thing.

Non-committal.

You know, we are not going to adjudicate.

whether or not I was committal about the fatty photo, the horrifying fatty photo.

So So Jen goes, but you know her undertone.

The presentation doesn't matter.

Okay, I like Jen, but is she taking up for me when Katie says something?

Does she step in?

When Drake doesn't come over after my sixth invitation, does she stick up for me?

Does she advocate for me with Drake and the basketball player?

What's his name?

Bon Bon?

I don't think so, homie.

And not only do I not know, I don't care.

And she does it with that frown teeth thing she does.

She's like, I don't care.

That's exactly why I'm bringing it up.

Yeah.

So Katie, Gretchen, Gene, and Tamara are inside.

And Katie's like, Did you ever talk to Jen?

And Tamara's like, Well, I went to lunch with her.

And it went like so fast.

She started calling me names.

She's calling me

the humble names.

She goes, Well, didn't you call her single white female?

She goes, Well, yeah, because she asked me.

And I said, You're obsessed.

You're reaching out to people who don't like me to build relationships with them.

And Gretchen goes, like who?

She goes, I lucky.

Well, she needed consoling.

I mean, you literally went out and told people the FBI rated Ryan.

And I apologize for that.

I mean, what's the big deal?

What happened to the times when you could just accuse someone of being rated by the FBI, bitch?

Yeah, it was a simple sorry.

That's all that required.

Come on.

And Gretchen's like, I feel like you're not really ever learning your lesson.

Like, you didn't because you did the same thing to Ryan and you do it all the time.

You keep doing the same things over and over.

It's like, come on, Gretchen.

I don't want to keep on going over the same old stuff forever.

Like you attacked me for 12 years, Gretchen.

Okay, I've been just so attacked.

I'm so attacked.

Started it.

Who started it?

That would you, Tamara?

She's been on defense for 12 years.

She hasn't been attacking you for 12 years.

She's been on defense.

Don't make me defend Gretchen on the same episode where we were pointing out that she's a transphobe homophobe.

Okay.

Do this to me.

It's like a fight of the asshole.

It's like two assholes just going at each other.

So Gretchen's like, you are actually delusional.

And she gets up and walks off.

And she's like, I'm going to excuse myself.

Delusional.

Literally delusional.

So she goes outside to sit by the other one.

She makes a big scene.

She's like, can I sit by you guys?

Because I don't want to sit by someone.

Delusional.

Did you just learn the word delusional?

You're really holding tight to that one.

Well, did you apologize for that Facebook comment?

Because you should show that you're the bigger person.

That's what I always do, which is why I really showed I was the bigger person with Katie earlier this season, right?

And America remembers that moment.

So she's like, well, I always have to be the bigger person and I'm over.

Can we stop talking about this photo?

It's disturbing enough that we had to look at it.

We already have a bigger person in the room, and that's Jen.

Jen, do you have anything to say?

Jen, would you like to apologize to us for being fat in our presence?

It was a long time ago.

The memory of it hurts.

I just got an extended seat belt for the memory of you.

Okay.

Jen, when we leave this party, we're going to ask you to leave from that exit instead.

That is the fat person exit.

Thank you so much.

And Gretchen's like, you can't reason with someone whacked out in the head.

I want to stoop to her level.

That's what I want to do.

Well, I hope all the gay and trans people in the world feel the same way right now.

So they all go inside.

I'm like, you guys want to see my ass?

Not really.

Luann just passes by.

Not really.

She's like over the fence, like Wilson.

Not really.

Well, Ann, you're supposed to be hiding her face.

What, a cabaret star supposed to hide her face behind a fence?

I don't think so.

Be cool.

So Gina has gifts for everybody.

So she hands them all gifts and she's like, don't open them yet.

I got to do a thing.

So she goes upstairs and hangs out a window.

And she's wearing like a New Orleans, you know, costume, like a bunch of beads, and she's got a little horn.

She's blowing a little horn.

It's like, ladies, you know, I'm no screen to the magic.

And I've had a magic experience for myself on the show since we're all talking about old clips today.

So I think you guys are in need of voodoo help yourselves.

I planned a trip to NOLA.

And like they like to say in New Orleans, don't forget to check your pockets.

So she throws beads, and Tamara's like, ha,

Ha!

Ha!

So she's, Tamara goes off with, she goes inside because New Orleans, it's too much for her.

It's too much.

What's in Mihana?

It's okay.

It's okay.

But all this talk about

former fatty photos and going to the city of Fat Tuesday.

It's too much.

It's too much for me right now.

Guys, don't you understand?

The last time Tamara was in NOLA was when Teddy fell down the stairs.

They were marble, marble stairs.

Oh my God.

That's right.

I'm in my old house.

I used to fall down the ladder to the second floor all the time.

Oh, God.

So Tamara's like, I'm just telling myself, she'll make it.

She'll make it.

And Gretchen's like, wow, she's really good at playing the victim, huh?

Gretchen not giving an inch.

She's like, no.

Yeah.

I will not accept your friend has cancer card.

No, it is not accepted.

Sorry.

She's not the hero we want, but she's the hero we have.

To quote Batman.

So Tamra and Sophia at home.

So Sophia is looking at her Spotify stats and she got a thousand monthly listeners, which is cool.

And she wrote a song about a girl who met a guy online who ends up being cannibal.

The song is called Cannibal.

The song is called The Love Life of Erica Jane.

So congratulations.

Oh my God, she's gossiping.

She's doing everything herself.

I mean, look at this.

Her friend is the girl who writes a song about a girl girl falling in love with a cannibal.

I won.

Wasn't there a song about that?

We are cannibals.

Anyway,

it doesn't ring a bell, but I'm sure there is.

I love that she's got a stolen cannibal song.

She's just like taking really macabre ideas, but they've already been bad.

Everything's been done at this point.

I'm going to write a song about this hotel in California where everybody goes to die.

Tamara's like, could you make me a song?

Sure.

I think The Bitch is Back.

That's not a new song.

But so Kay's like, no, you can't even sing.

I'm not going to write you a song.

We've already made you a song, and it's called Hey Betch.

And there will be no better Tamara song ever written than Hey Betch.

So

it will be playing at the end of this episode.

Thank you.

Hey, bitch.

Hey, Batch.

Hey, Batch.

Hey, Batch.

So then we go to Katie and son being boring.

I mean, they're boring.

She's like, my son plays the piano.

I don't care.

And also, he makes his own songs, and they're not about cannibals.

What a nerd.

You know, I love when the housewives, when the producers are like, let's add some thematic parallels in an episode.

You have Sophia making songs on Spotify, and then you have Bandon making songs not on Spotify.

Loser, loser.

Way to not get ahead in the business.

Congratulations.

Good luck making songs by yourself that go nowhere without Spotify.

Dumbass.

Hey, listen to your song on Nobody Heard Itify.

Wow.

Please welcome four-time never had a Grammy Never Will.

Loser.

Bandon.

Just Josh in.

He's acel.

Yeah, just a little baby.

So then we go to Emily and her family, and she's like slopped some ground beef into a pan and is pushing it around.

And

so her son's like, what is that?

And she goes, ground beef.

I just got it out of my purse.

You want to try it?

And he's like, no, it looks weird.

And then he runs off.

She's like, oh, my God, he's got an eating disorder.

You think his ground beef looks weird?

Oh, my God.

So she makes it another, another soup for that.

To be fair, that may be most people's reactions to Emily's pan of ground beef that she's working on.

It did not look appetizing.

I can't imagine any kid walking in and seeing that in a pan and being like, delicious, mom, put it on a plate, right?

It's like raw beef.

Yes.

Can I have a piece of that half-cooked ground beef?

It looked horrible.

It's like, I can't believe he doesn't want to eat it, Shane.

We need to do something.

Emily,

you're writing a little hard on this storyline.

Yeah.

So Emily does, Emily has a conversation with Shane and, you know, they're talking about how they're going to find out where he is on the spectrum soon.

So then we have Jen and Ryan at the gym and They're working on their their workout plan because they're gonna get married.

Are we gonna see their wedding on this season?

I feel like they're queuing it up, but there was no indication, I feel like anywhere that there's gonna be a wedding.

It doesn't feel like the cheapest bravo wedding ever because they're just gonna be on a beach.

So done.

Yeah.

Done.

So they're working out.

And Jen is saying that like a lot of women struggle with confidence and body image.

So hearing, hearing that Tamara's showing up a fatty photo of me is just gross.

I mean, how old are are you?

I can't believe she's throwing a fatty, fatty photo, big, blubbery, fatty photo of me.

I'm like, why are people, why do they keep saying fatty photo?

They're saying fatty so much.

I know it was cracking me up.

So, Brian's like,

oh, sorry.

Yeah, and by the way, I think we should also point out.

Like, A,

it's just a photo.

Like, she's like a little heavier in the photo, but like, they make it sound like she is in Gilbert Grape.

And also, even if she were, like, who cares?

But like,

they are, they really are acting like these are old problematic tweets that are going to get her canceled.

Allah, Gretchen.

And it's Tamra was doing it to be mean.

Like, she, I don't even like it.

Look at it.

She used to be fat.

I mean, that's, Tamara is so disgusting, but the way that everyone's acting, you're right.

And that's why we're laughing so much about it.

Cause like a fatty photo, you see the picture.

It's like, what, you had a kid a month ago?

Like, what are you talking about?

Jen has a perfect Barbie body.

Like nobody,

only in Orange County would people be

scandalized by somebody being a different weight at a different time.

You know, it's so stupid.

But also just the way that they're kind of like so insensitive about it.

Like they're, they're horrified about it, but they're just the way that I keep saying like, look at this fatty photo.

I can't believe she's showing a fatty photo.

Did you hear there's a fatty photo going around?

And there's just like the way they keep saying fatty is like, it's just, it's so mean.

And they just keep saying it over and over again in this, with like clutching their pearls.

It's one of those shows.

It's so hilarious to watch.

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Now they're talking about the kids situation and Ryan's like, yeah, you know, I'm just having a problem with your ex.

I mean, it's problematic.

This guy, it's been over a year.

You know, the kids live with us.

You've got a lump sum in your divorce degree.

He hasn't paid a dollar towards.

He doesn't pay them anything.

And then we see Jeff Lewis show, the biggest shitstir on this show these days.

He's on his show and he's like, so you got $500 in your divorce?

And she's like, well, it's $200, but no, I have not received any of that.

Okay, well, you get $6,000 a month in whatever.

And she's like, well, unfortunately, he has not been able to make those payments.

So

he did give me a bag of peppermint patties and says says that this exonerates him from all obligations.

And I did agree until Ryan said this is not the same thing as $200,000.

And I said, you're right.

You're absolutely right.

So we gave him back the peppermint patties.

Then Tamara cheered for me.

Somewhere.

I just felt Tamara cheering for me.

And she's like, you know, I just worry this situation is going to be a drag for Ryan.

You know, I just don't want it to be a drag because he'll want fun and then he'll leave me.

What am I going to do?

And so she's like, you know, at least we're we're communicating.

And thank you for telling me how much it's bothering you because to get the attention of my last husband, I mean, the only time I could even get his attention was to get naked.

And then suddenly the laptop would close and the AirPods would come out.

And he's like,

well, I definitely need to get some more AirPods.

Yes.

Bam.

So then we go to Gina at Shannon's and she's like, oh my God, look, I brought, I bought pizza.

It's Gina's pizza.

Oh my god, he's like, ask me to borrow 20

i just can't it

the poor pizza

this pizza is styled so poorly

um so you brought me a pizza and the box says pizza that is so you

wow

How funny, because I remember walking down the streets of New York City eating pizza with hands and being a normal person.

And did I ever get a box of Gina's pizza?

I don't think so.

Why do pizza boxes always say pizza?

It's like you're the most obvious box in the world.

Like no one is going to think a pizza box is anything else.

The only thing shaped like a pizza box is a pizza box.

Yeah.

Save yourself the font.

You know?

It's like, oh my God, did someone deliver me a frisbee?

I finally got a frisbee on it.

I really need to write pizza on that so I don't get my hopes up.

I just ate a frisbee.

So

Gina is marveling at all of Shannon's plates.

Wow.

I've never seen so many plates in my life.

It's like so many plates, and they're all made of metal.

I love that Gina is shocked by someone having different kinds of plates for different things.

She's like, wow, none of those are people.

That's crazy.

I feel bad for people, plates.

So she asks Shannon how she's feeling.

She's like, well, I'm alone and I

love it.

It's just so crazy how much fun I'm having being all alone with none of my kids here to talk to me, no husband to talk to, nobody around trying to kiss me or make me feel good about myself.

I'm just so

happy.

You know what I love about being alone is you just get to sit at home and think about how you went to some hotel once and man after man after man came through that door and still couldn't find love.

Wow.

Oh, I'm happy.

I'm a very happy person at home alone.

Home alone.

Sometimes I just go up to the bathroom and put a heft of spray on my cheeks and go, wow.

It's like Kenny McAllister.

I mean, home alone kid was miserable.

Look at his childhood and he's even got a marriage.

So I'm so happy so happy for him.

I want to put all my

sometimes I put all my jewelry out on a table and hope maybe two burglars will come by and visit, but nope.

I wouldn't even make any, I wouldn't even make any crazy traps for them or anything.

I just, I would be the crazy trap

you've you won you won me steal me take me away i did dangle myself from a rope and hope that a burglar would walk in so i'd come swing at their face like a pan can and just fake out but didn't really no one ever opened that door so i just dangled there for a whole afternoon

So Gina's like, okay, well, how are you feeling?

And well, you got a bench of men.

I don't know why you're upset.

She's like, oh, well, I've got Adam and Phil.

They want to hang out with me, but they don't want to get intimate with me.

So,

yeah, I wasn't really listening.

Can you believe, Shannon?

Can you believe that there's a form of fat photo of Jen?

Former fatty photo.

She's like, oh, well, there's a hypocrisy there.

She can dish it out, but she cannot take it.

So Gina's like, yeah, she's not growing.

She's mean.

And so now we talk about Gina.

And she's like, well, you know, like, we're both working and that's good.

But like, we haven't seen Travis's son for three weeks and his ex stops sending him to school.

And I know it's because I said, you know, it's a response to us moving in together.

So like, I have, like, I feel bad about that, but like, I don't know what to do.

Like, what is enough enough here?

Well, I don't like to use the whole bottle.

Oh, I thought you were talking about the hairspray that you've been using.

Oh, no.

That's.

You're talking about your

this lady.

Oh, yeah.

It's very difficult.

Yeah, it's like difficult to think that your choices are like either live apart and be happy or live together and pay a price with clean teachers,

or just live alone and have some poor person bringing you boxes that say pizza.

So Gina's like, yeah, but I'm like not giving it up to someone who wants to take it.

You know what I'm saying?

I don't know what you're saying, actually.

Do you think marriage will help?

Do you guys want to get married?

Because I would love to watch.

another divorce season for you.

Well, I don't know.

Like, she just wants to mess it up.

It's not bad.

it's not cool i feel bad

so she doesn't know if she can handle this the rest of her life and she's definitely not having more children and this does sound like hell oh my gosh imagine oh terrible and the prize you get at the end of the day is travis i mean no and could you imagine this lady is not sending the kid to school we were just talking about this what was it on un unschooling unschooling yes unschooling your children it's a thing it's a thing that people do now so gina is

packing with meatball.

I do like meatball.

She's like, meatball, did you fall?

And then meatball's like, I did.

Thank you for announcing that to

America.

It was a silent but deadly, but you just made it loud and deadly.

And then Ryan is, Ryan and Jen are packing.

And Jen's like, what is Mardi Gras, by the way?

It's just an excuse to get drunk and show boobs.

And then Ryan's like, can I come?

So then Ryan's like,

yeah, it's where, you know, Mardi Gras happens.

You know, you've heard of Fat Tuesday.

How dare you, Ryan?

How dare you bring that up right now?

It's not the time.

Why would you say that?

I hear there's photos.

So I hear Tamara showing a photo of Mardi Gras around.

It's just not right.

So then we go to Shane and Emily being wacky.

And he's like, I went to New Orleans once.

We went into a voodoo shop.

Pretty creepy.

I love you.

Shane is the little Mormon kid going into a voodoo shop.

Just still horrifies to this day.

I know.

Emily's like, there are people in this group who are possessed.

We can do an exorcism.

And thankfully, we leave that scene.

And then we go to Shannon and she's talking to her daughter.

And she's like, well, okay, I don't want any, I don't want to risk any negative voodoo shit coming inside me.

And the daughter's like, oh, mom.

What?

I just don't want anything coming inside me.

I don't,

here's what I don't want.

I don't want like a big explosion of who knows what.

I don't want a big creamy voodoo moment that's going to come right inside me.

Mom, you just please stop.

Can we leave this FaceTime now?

So it's airport time.

So they're going and they have to do separate flights because it's not easy getting all of these bitches with a

non-stop flight with first cleanup.

It's like it's hard.

It's like hard to get Dubro to fly commercial, period.

And Heather did look disgusted this entire trip.

She just,

you know she had like a pack like like six inches tall of like wet wipes she's like hold on one second let me just wipe this down like ma'am uh don't worry we we cleaned down all the make sure this was covet free no germs no it's not germs it's just poor oils poor people oils let's just wipe those all off thank you And they also call it first class, but it's like, it's one of the planes.

It doesn't have true first class.

It has the just like slightly bigger seats, but that's it.

You're still like rammed in there.

i loved that for heather yeah because it's not a transcon a pure transcon flight so it's since it's only going from like lax to new orleans only going halfway across the country they don't get like the pods that you would if you're going from like new york to

but even the even the normal first class like even without all that you know the normal one has like the big wide seats like with a thing in the middle and all that they didn't even have that they just had those like sad ones where you're like oh my god i found first class for cheap and then you get on there and you're like oh it's not first class it's It's like comfort plus.

But don't forget, Gina booked the tickets.

I feel me.

They're lucky they weren't sitting on those spirit airline like bicycle seats and shit that they're making you do now.

They're on Gina's Pizza Airlines.

So they arrive.

I feel me.

Yeah, Heather is.

IFB Airlines.

I feel beat.

Heather's like trying to do a bit.

She's like, oh my goodness, I love it.

I love it.

I love the Poor People Airlines.

Do you guys have, what are they called?

Pretzels?

I would love one of those thank you so much so one group gets on the plane meanwhile the other group is in uh shannon is in a spank store in the airport and she's like i have to go to the spank store i wear spanks every day i'm seeing if they have new stuff

so then um gina is talking about

beads oh she's like oh my god they've got beads at the store she goes oh yeah you flash them for beads and if you come home with beads i know what you're doing

what

No, it was rhetorical.

What am I doing?

It means you flash your boobs.

Oh.

Anyway, we're staying in the same room, everyone, because we're like, we're like Bert and Ernie, right?

Yeah, we're like Bert and Ernie, but I'm like more like, I'm more like Bert because I'm like more linear.

I'm like the linear one.

I'm like, I don't think that's the right use of linear, but sure.

Also, you're calling her fat.

Yes.

What the fuck?

That's so, what is with this show?

It's like, I'm the more, you know, only Neon one.

And Emily's like, yeah, I'm the fat, the fat orange one.

So then now at the hotel that I want.

No, I was,

I was saying, I wouldn't want to be called the orange one.

Yeah, the fat orange one.

So, I mean, you're powerful.

At least you're powerful.

You've got a lot of power for a couple of years.

So then, I don't know what you're talking about.

I just, it's like, it's not my favorite color.

So we go down,

we go to the hotel.

Gretchen, Katie, Gina, and Emily are the ones that get to New Orleans.

And so they walk around.

They go to the water and they see stuff in the water.

And Katie's like, is that an alligator?

And Gina's like, oh, my God, alligators live here.

Oh, my God.

What's this river?

So Katie doesn't know.

So she looks up the river.

And Gina's like, yes.

None of them know.

Gina calls the river the bayou.

She thinks the bayou is just a bot is a, is a, is the name of a river in America.

It's not even the bayou river.

This is just what the bayou is.

They're on literally the most famous river in the entire country.

One of the most famous rivers in the entire world.

What is this?

What river is this anyway?

And by the way, when you go down, I'm like on one all of a sudden.

When you go down to New Orleans, there are like signs everywhere that's like, Mississippi River, Mississippi River.

Come board the Mississippi River Queen.

Like, well, we know what is this place.

I'm confused.

I like that they go up and ask a local they're like what river is that and he goes it's just a river

he gets an X and then Katie's like no no it's a river but it's called something you guys let me look it up so she I don't know what she does but she still doesn't get it and the producer tells her it's the Mississippi she goes well I don't I don't know about geography God

I You know what?

You don't have to know about geography, but at least be able to use Google Maps, please.

Although, actually, in defense, in defense, Google Maps drives me nuts because how many times do you like look to see what the name of a street is and the name is not there and you have to like scroll all the way up the street because they decided to put the label elsewhere and the label does not dynamically move down to where you're looking at that moment.

That actually, actually drives me nuts, but it does not take away from the fact that they still should have known that that was the Mississippi River.

Yeah, you're still dummies.

You're dumb, dumb people.

On the plane,

Heather is doing that standing up thing where she's talking to her friend standing up because this is what you should be able to do on private jets.

So this is how the other half lives, normal people.

Okay.

I hate when people stand in the aisle to talk to their friends.

I don't know why.

It drives me nuts.

They're always lingering over someone.

They always have their hand on someone else's seat.

Someone's probably trying to sleep nearby and they're having a conversation, always dangling over.

And when Heather does it, she really dangles over.

She really gets that Coraline's mother dangle going, you know.

And it's just, it's too much.

So

Shanna's being super wacky and she's like i'm putting stuff on my lips and you want some and heather goes oh you want me to put nipple cream on my lips oh it's nipple cream

oh god i'm good

you know when you live alone you know you just sort of forget you forget what cream is for what am i right god so many creams mother please just stop talking so emily's like oh you know i went horseback riding with jen the other day and she said that shannon told her not to roll on her.

And Taram's like, well, I wouldn't either, especially with that photo going around.

And Emily's like, well, Shannon likes to have an ally.

So

they're acting like they don't.

Who's talking about Burton Ernie?

Like, who is fucking talking?

Look what happened the second Gina tried to hang out with anyone else.

You're like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're leaving me for Ether to bro.

Enjoy your life with Ether to bro.

I'm just going to stay here and eat this fried chicken in my purse.

If we have to sit through another season of emily and gina complaining to each other that they don't have each other's backs like please yeah so emily's like why is it why is the opposite i i keep telling everyone to do and gina's like well we want everyone to get along that's what we famously like that's why every time every year when people tune in to see us they say let's watch gina emily and how they make sure that everyone gets along Yeah, but they're also the couple that starts the most shit on the show.

I mean, Tamara does, obviously, but they spread Tamara's shit.

You know, they're the agents agents spreading shit.

Like Gina's, Gina started this whole Katie, you know, thing, the fatty photo things.

I mean, they're starting, they start it.

So Gina's like, um, yeah, we want everyone to get along.

And like Gretchen, you're like, we get you got problems with Tamara.

And I'm like, we'll work our way up to that.

That's a big one.

That's a big one.

And so Gretchen's like, yeah, you guys, you know what?

I'm praying about it a lot.

I really am.

I'm just asking Jesus to like change my heart, but she has to take accountability and document somewhere that she won't try to get a penis later because it's really important for the children of this country.

And I'm all about forgiveness, but the Bible doesn't require you to reconcile with people who are trying to harm you.

And that is called wizardom.

Like, really?

She did say wizardom, right?

I rewound it five times and laughed and said stupid

wizard.

She said wizardom.

Dumb hooker ass Gretchen.

Oh my God, Gretchen.

Well, first of all, stop praying to God to find like some sort of forgiveness in your heart for Tamara.

God created

God, God got not going to...

Tamara's the devil.

I don't think God wants you to be forgiving to the devil.

God created the devil, too.

Have you watched The Nature Show?

Take a look at what God's created.

Have you seen a lion eat a deer?

God's also got other things to deal with, not like trying to help you reconcile coexist with Tamara.

So, um, Gretchen's like, What's it gonna take for that woman to stop spreading the lies?

So, now the other plane lands,

and uh, Jen has a lot of luggage, but Tamara helps her, which just goes to show that there's hope.

And Jen says, You know, when Tamara is kind, it feels like she's like my girlfriend again, but like something in my brain says, Be careful, because the other shoe will drop.

No, well, cause your foot's too fat, form a fatty hat, it's gonna be stuck on there for years.

Yeah,

Stop dropping cheese and start trying to drop some weight, bitch.

So Shannon's like, well, my suitcase is wet.

What is it?

Rainy?

Is this sweat?

What is this?

Sweat?

And someone's like, it's sweat.

She goes, oh, that is disgusting.

It's just so wet.

Everything is just so wet.

It's just, oh, I just can't.

It's, you know, it's very exciting, but it's the, I'm so excited about this trip that look, my, my case got wet.

Mother, I swear to God, if you do do not stop talking on this episode, I am going to come down there and put some duct to buy my mouth.

I had so much fun in New Orleans.

The first thing I did, I was like, wow, this place is great.

I'm wet.

Wet as it can be.

Wet as a whistle.

So

we're, Heather's in a room.

Champagne.

Oh, look, look.

I got myself champagne.

That is so nice of me to give that to myself.

Oh, I love it.

I just loved Heather walking around this tiny, dingy, dark room, looking like trying to look like she was okay with it.

It was so funny.

She's like,

look, I can walk from the bed all the way to the other end of the room by just taking one step.

And there's champagne.

I'm sure it's a delicious brand as well.

Wow.

Yeah, they were in a four seasons, but I think Heather is like, yes, but we stay at the five seasons.

So

this is a bit down market for us.

It looked down market for Heather, that room for sure.

It did.

So then Shannon has a wacky trying to get her suitcase open moment.

And Katie goes over to Jen's room and Tamara comes to Tamara's room.

Gina comes to Tamara's room.

And Gina's like, I'm arrived in my room.

I just wanted to come by your room and see how you're dealing with everything.

I'm dealing better.

Bless the meaner.

Everybody's so mean to you, Tamara.

Poor thing.

I am a poor thing.

Let's give her.

Get your hand off me, bitch, why you're trying to be me?

I am you.

No, you're not the devastator.

Oh my God, I just walked in on Tamra having a one-woman show.

Scary.

How are you doing, Tamra?

She's like, I'm nervous.

I have hashtag social anxiety.

And I have to have dinner with all these people.

So then Katie is saying, talking to Jen.

And she's like, you know, they brought up the pics of you again.

You know, the fatty pics.

The super, super fatty, fatty, fatty photos.

And, you know, I just said it's unfair.

And, you know, to say that she's moving on.

And then you bring out the fatty photos.

Like, why would they just bring out Blubbert 3.0 photos?

And Jen's like, well, you know what we should do?

Why don't we sit her down and just say, Tamara, your apologies do not work anymore.

They just don't work.

And so we go back to Gina.

She's like, yeah, let's have a good night tonight because that goes spiral into more good nights.

And she's like, oh my God, you made me feel so much better.

Wow.

Wow.

How sad is it that I'm in a season where my only refuge is Gina?

And that is sad.

That's a sad place to be.

So then we are in a car.

Now it's a little bit later and they're in a car, I guess, going to dinner.

or wherever they're going, lunch maybe.

And Heather and Katie and Jen and Gretchen are in the car.

And Jen is like, well, we went on a riverboat today.

It was fun and peaceful.

Oh, and now we're here.

Went from one disgusting mode of transportation to another great trip everyone

so then in shannon's van emily's like hey shannon and she lifts up her skirt and she's like come on have a look at your vagina the whole night and shannon just lifts her skirt all the way up and they blur out her badge and she's like well i guess i just put some some nipple cream on here accidentally so

this is why you always have to stop by the spank store in the airport because now i didn't get my spanks and look look what you see blur so now they arrive at the restaurant.

And when they get there, the host is like, okay, everyone, I'm going to show you your table, but we're going to pass the ghost's table first.

Okay.

The ghost.

Oh, is that Gina Keogh?

No, she's still alive.

Okay.

It is the lady who, is it the lady who designed the swimsuits?

No,

it's not her either.

Oh, is it, is it the, is it

not, what was her name again?

I wanted to say Vicki, but it's not Vicki.

Peggy.

Peggy one and two.

Is it a double ghost of both Peggy's?

Hey, that reminds me.

No ball in house.

That reminds me.

Where has Vicky been?

She's not a friend of this season.

Wasn't she here last year?

She was here last year.

Did we not see?

Remember last year when she arrived in the middle of the trip, she went

in the door.

Yeah, we haven't seen any Vicki.

No Victoria so far.

Nope.

No Vicky so far.

Okay, so not that I'm complaining, but so then we get,

they're trying to guess who the ghost is.

So then Shannon's like, well, I have heard ghosts having parties in my house at night.

I hope they're having fun.

Once I was upset in my kitchen, sitting there alone thinking how happy I am.

And a ghost just sat there and stared at me and ate chips very slowly.

Who are you going to call?

Anyone, really.

Anyone.

Shannon Busters.

So

the host, she has a very sad experience with that song.

When there's something strange in the neighborhood, are you going to call?

Many people, because they don't answer the phones anymore for me.

It doesn't matter who I'd call, they won't answer.

So the host interests.

The ghost table, and it's Pierre.

And Pierre was a resident owner in the 1700s.

It was his grand estate.

So I'm sure it was a very pleasant place.

Like, just think of what was going on in the 1700s in this place.

Oh, yeah.

Whoever would love it?

Thomas Ravenel.

So, Heather.

I have some repression soup.

Sounds delicious.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So then Heather's like, oh, wouldn't it be fun to hunt Chateau Soup Dubrux?

See if they took my etched window down.

See if they have round time.

See if they ever let Richard Marks out of the basement.

Oh, it would be so hilarious.

Yeah,

so Joe will be right with you.

And Gina's like, wait a minute, is Joe with us or is he like a ghost too?

Because like, I don't know if I want like a waiter that's a ghost.

Because like that would mean that the waiter is probably like invisible, right?

Like, how's he gonna carry a dream?

I'm like, hilarious.

I have a question about the turtle soup.

Is that actual turtle?

Or is this like how when we say Wendy Malik has a career?

Technically, yes, I guess it's a career, but we all know it's not really a career.

And Tamara's like, can I eat in a turtle?

Come on.

And she's like, I'll try the turtle soup because like I like to try things where we are.

And also, I get turtles sometimes in my backyard.

And you never know when you're going to need to feed the kids.

Oh,

wow.

Gretchen, you look like you're the detective emoji because you're wearing a fedora.

And Tarama's like, oh God, another Gretchen costume.

You know, she went on, she in and searched rich detective.

And for 15 bucks, this is what she got.

Ha, Bern.

Hashtag burn.

So, do you have to travel from Skylar?

Because one thing

I regret is not traveling more without the children.

Okay.

By the way,

who is with your children, Jen?

And she's like, well, Ryan, I mean, they're supposed to be with Will, but that's not really working out.

She's like,

how do him and Ryan interact?

And she says, well, they usually don't, but they did today because Ryan had the kids and he

went up to the ex and he said, how could you do this?

Pay your child support.

And Will said he does the best he can.

You know, he pays the driver's insurance.

And, you know, he said he's on the loan for Harrison's school.

He's one of 10 people.

But yeah, so that was his defense.

And Jen tells us that, like, Will is very controlling.

And like, by Ryan confronting Will, Will is probably going to retaliate by blocking her and make life hard, etc.

So, Emily's like, Well, if he's if he's ordered to pay support, he has to pay it.

God damn it.

And Katie's like, I just feel bad for Ryan.

Matt has been in the same spot, you know.

And she talks about custody issues and everything.

And she was like, You know, it's hard to sit back and be the person to do nothing.

Like, because Travis's ex was contacting my child and my ex-husband, and I haven't seen his stepson in a month.

And he's like, not at school.

Outrageous that we're letting this poor woman talk so much at the dinner.

This is, you're only allowed to have five minutes, Gina.

Emily's like, I'm a lawyer.

He should be in front of a judge.

So Heather, one of the waiters comes behind Heather and spills a drink on her.

And I died.

I mean, this is, this trip is hell for Heather.

Heather is hating every second of this fucking trip.

But did she stand up into the waiter's drink?

It looks like she was standing and that's why she got spilled spilled on, right?

Or was she standing because she got spilled on?

I watched it several times because what you first see is that the waiter is putting down like an espresso martini and then it like knocks over.

But then Heather stands up after that and then winds up wiping her back.

I think what happens is he had a tray of espresso martinis and as he was leaning forward to put down one, the tray tilted and they fell.

on Heather's back, which startled him, which is why the one on the table, he shook it because he's like, oh, shit.

So all we do know is...

There's lots of spilling.

I think the spill we saw was actually the secondary spill and that there was a main spill that happened down Heather's back, which is sad that we didn't get to see the full view of it, but great knowing that

a service person spilled a cocktail down Heather de Brough's back.

Oh my God.

That person

ever seen Joe again.

Fed to the alligators in the Mississippi River, which turned out to be just logs.

I'm sorry, can we have him replaced with an Alfredo?

Thank you.

Well, at least if they're going to spill on me, at least they spilled with my own glassware that I sent ahead of me.

I tried to bring Alfredo, but he got lost in the luggage.

So Jen's like, oh my God, for all of the people for the ghost to spill on.

I mean, that cost more money than my whole month's rent before I got evicted.

I mean,

that happened.

How could you get evicted when I'm the realtor?

So Emily is like, okay, well, Tamara, you and Gretchen really need to have a sit-down.

And she's like, yeah, I'd rather talk to Jen.

Okay, all right, go in chronological order, but like not tonight, because tonight we're going to have fun.

All right.

So the food comes.

They like the turtle soup because turtle soup is good.

I had it once, like 10 years ago.

I enjoyed it.

It's fine.

And then just in case anyone wanted an express culinary review on turtle soup, that's my thought.

Flash reap was my thought.

Flash review, by bad.

Flash review.

I like turtle soup.

All right.

So Shannon,

turtle soup, not so bad.

Moving on.

They start talking about Shannon getting a missed call from Adam and Jen's like, okay, Shannon, if you could create a man on a vision board, what would you put?

Well, first of all,

a man.

Any man.

Really?

I don't care.

A man with vision?

I don't even care.

Really?

Whoever you want.

Yeah, I don't know if you guys know this, but earlier this evening, Slimer came to my room and I thought, honestly, I would date him.

A little messy, but gives me something to do.

Clean up after him.

Oh, I've got one.

Would you date a short guy?

Hello, that was very personal.

It wasn't.

It wasn't.

Terry's worn lifts for years.

Oh, God.

He's got lifts.

They're from China.

And his shoes are high and very highly priced.

So he probably won't be getting any more anytime soon.

okay Shannon you have a bevy of men okay a bevy well they well they they they don't they don't want to be intimate they're just friends they're friends and and most of them are ghosts at this point it's it's been an issue it's very hard to make out with someone when they have no corporal presence so I'm like well I can't even imagine being single

the only thing that's worse than a fatty photo is a single photo am I right everyone I mean you have to give blowjobs and get on top again.

I don't do that.

I like it from behind so I can watch TV.

I like watching my 600-pound lifeline getting banged.

If I could add snacks, I would, because I'm wacky.

Well, how about you, Debrow?

How about me what?

Are you going to win on this?

I'm sorry, I'm just thinking about the many sternly worded letters I'm going to be writing to the management of this restaurant for having an espresso martini trickling down my back for the rest of this evening.

Continue on without me.

I'm just thinking 600 pounds.

How many gens was that?

I mean, that's that's like two maids right there.

So Emily, so Gina's like, oh, I know she likes being on to.

And Emily says, okay, yo, she's probably like, oh, yeah, Terry, tell me about your stock portfolio.

Oh, oh, yeah, talk about stocks.

Sarah's like, I'm not thinking yet.

I never,

ever made a sex video ever.

Have you?

And just want everyone to know that if you have made a sex video, you do not count as an actress.

Just want to set some ground rules right away.

I mean, I don't know if you would count this one where I just got basically espresso martini bukied by Joe.

And Shannon goes, well, I'm sure Katie has sex videos because she records.

That's what she does.

Katie's like, you're right.

She goes, well, it's something for her to talk about, Bonnie Rape.

But my favorite position is on this side.

Cause so I could go to bed.

I'll show you.

Let's get down on the floor.

So she's, I guess, on the floor and she's like emulating having sex on the floor of a nice restaurant.

Um, where I was like, oh, if only the, that careless waiter could come back and spill an entire tray on her.

Yeah.

So Joe, the waiter, is upset.

He looks very upset that they're fucking on the floor.

And Jen's like, well, you know, that my vagina, it doesn't work.

Jen's like, oh my God, your vagina's broken.

And Shamer's like, yeah,

the holes closed up, right?

With the laser thing, what'd you do to it?

And she goes, it was pelvic floor surgery.

It's, it's literally, right now it's just the tip.

Just the tip goes in there.

It's like that.

She's like, Ryan's a sneak.

Kitty's like, her mouth must be tired.

Guys, I'm having so much fun.

But like, some of us have our differences.

but like I'm happy that you're all here and we're having the best time ever.

Friendship, friendship, friendship.

And

24 hours later, you are the leak.

Stop lying.

I cannot stand you.

You are the worst person in the world.

You were spreading around fatty pictures.

None of this is your business, bitch.

You're rude and you're sloshed.

She's losing her mind.

I'm out of here.

I'm out of here.

Poor person.

Poor person.

Yeah.

And Gina says, oh my God, you guys, Tamara just quit the show.

Dawn, dawn, done, done.

Such a funny episode, such a good season.

Thank you, everyone, for being here.

Hope you all have a tremendous weekend.

If you're in New Orleans, I hope you survived having these people in your town.

So, um, thanks, everyone.

Have a great weekend, and we'll see you on Monday.

Bye for crappy or bye-to-club.

Walking to the club, everybody say my name.

Walking to the mall, and a same.

Everywhere I go, people holler every day.

I raise my hands up and holler back.

Hey, batch!

Hey, batch!

Hey, batch!

If you don't know me, you're welcome to blow me.

Batch,

hey, batch!

Hey, batch!

Every day's a parade, don't keep it trying to shake.

Magazines are blogs, but if Facebook advises that, I rule them all, cause when I play, I went down.

People magazine called and said, I'm the bait.

Asked me lots of questions, I answered every one.

Hey, batch!

Hey, batch!

Hey, batch!

You pretend not to love me, but don't think you're above me.

Batch,

hey, batch,

hey, batch.

You can try to hate me, but lives celebrate me.

Boy, batch, girl, bad,

batch, batch, all around the world.

Even strike safe,

bad, baby, batch, bad, batch, even baby.

Batch, batch.

Read the holy book.

Even God said to ratch, batch.

Batch.

Watch what crap ins would like to thank its premium sponsors.

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