#2999 RHOM S7E15: Ships and Giggles

Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, everybody.

I'm Ronnie, and that's Ben.

Hi, Ben.

Hi.

This special episode of Watch What Crop-Ins is brought to you by Virgin Voyages.

Today we're going to be diving into the latest episodes of Real Housewives of Miami.

The girls hit the high seas with Virgin Voyages and per usual, they pop off.

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When I take my first Virgin Voyages cruise, I will tell you this right now.

Based off of watching this episode that we're just about to recap, I'm going straight to that spa.

That spa looked amazing, and I will not be like Kiki.

I will take my sweet, sweet time.

I'm going to walk through every single ounce of that spa.

It looked amazing.

I've become a real spa person.

And

that had my name written all over it.

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Learn more at virginvoyages.com or contact your travel advisor.

So thank you, Virgin Voyages.

Party, baby.

Honestly, wow.

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

Ronnie, how are you doing today?

Great.

You know, I love a Monday.

I love a Monday too.

Also, I have to say, I had a real rush when this episode ended of Miami because I thought for sure with all the talk about this Christmas party at the Shoma Bazaar, I was like, okay, I'm ready for it for them to say next week on the season finale.

But they didn't say it.

I was like, oh, we still have another episode.

I don't know how long this season is, but I was actually a little shocked that the season finale was not announced for next week.

Yeah, nice.

Get more Miami in our lives never hurt anybody, that's for sure.

Yeah, and actually.

I do want to get to the reunion, though, because I want to know what this big historic moment of the reunion is.

It's going to be stupid.

Can you tell me just more about this?

Stupid.

What have you heard so far?

Because I heard that.

Kiki did an interview, and she was saying, oh,

the reunion, something huge happens.

It's never happened.

A huge bomb has dropped.

It's going to be crazy.

And everybody's like, oh, my God.

Yeah, the reunion's nuts.

And no one's going to believe it's historic, the first time this has ever happened at a reunion.

So people are trying to figure out what it is.

My guess was that Stephanie quits because she had some post after the reunion that, I don't know, seemed like that, but it's not really my idea.

I'd like saw something like that on Reddit and was like, maybe that's what happened, but I don't know because now that I'm watching it, I don't think Stephanie's going to quit.

No, maybe Andy's like, you know what?

I've had enough of her.

We're done.

We're ending the reunion right now.

And he just leaves himself.

It's like, I'm out of here.

He just drops the mic.

I'm out.

Fuck you guys.

Yeah, I don't know.

I mean,

Miami reunions have been rough for him ever since the very first one.

I will never forget that first one when they had him lined up in the clubhouse and those women were like, we are going to get a season two.

And they squabbled.

And it was mainly Adriana.

And it was, it was such a pylon.

It was crazy.

And they've been doing it ever since.

The Miami reunions are...

They require a certain amount of patience as a host.

So I'm going to say, I'm going to predict that Andy finally says, you know what?

We're ending this reunion early.

I'm going to have to say.

I'm out of here.

I'm a dad now.

Okay,

so episode 15 of season seven, Birthday's Blues Cruise.

So Kiki meets with Julia and Julia's, I don't know, getting crazy hair done.

And Kiki's like, oh my God, I party so hard.

Who's coming to this?

All of us?

She's like, oh, some girls, we have workout today, aerobics.

Yes, there's aerobics day for some girls.

Yeah.

It's going to be like a 70s idiots thing.

I just want to point out that Julia winds up getting essentially like Harshall cornrows, which is like what every girl in my middle school would do if they like went down to the Caribbean for spring break.

It's like, come back with the cornrows and Julia is like, I am of a certain age and I will still do it as well.

Okay, good for you.

Thank you.

And then we go to Larza with Stephanie and they're dressed in their 80s leg warmers outfits.

They're doing daerobics today, you guys.

So they go check it out and it's this big crazy like dance room, like a party room, not a party room, but like a club, you know, like an ADS club.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And it's the, it's VHS aerobics.

Okay.

And so a guy comes in.

He's like, we are doing aerobics today, Queens icons.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes, Queen.

Yes, that ball change patch.

Oh my God.

Look at this.

They got shake weights.

I mean, imagine this.

This reminds me of Steve.

This reminds me, this reminds me of Steve when he sees a bird out the window.

Wow, he just starts to pulsum like this.

He's a crazy guy, right?

Anyone want a cocky?

Anyone?

I mean, what even are these things?

They look perverse.

What are you saying?

They look like a penis or something?

No, they look like weights.

Penises aren't perverse.

Working out ass.

So Lars is like, oh my God, you could like this look like, like, look, shake it.

Like, look, oh, my God.

Can someone film this?

I need it for content.

It's like a shake weight shaking.

Like, oh, my God.

But why is the tip jangling?

It's like, because that's what they're supposed to do, Marisol.

Okay, well, I'm leading aerobics today, whether I like it or not.

I don't want dick to get mad at me if I lead a bad aerobics class.

Am I right, Dick?

Remember Richard Branson?

We call him Dick because it's like Dick.

Here's my thing: I like to say the word dick a lot, but then when I see something that's actually undulating, I'm like, oh my God, this is perverted.

I don't know.

So am I a prude or am I sassy?

I can't tell.

And then Gertie comes in way too excited, as usual.

It's like, oh my God, look at this.

This is aerobics.

We're going to do aerobics today.

This is crazy.

This is absolutely nuts.

Look at my wig.

Look at this wig.

It's like flash dance.

We're going to do flash dance or like gurdy dance.

That's what I call it.

Gertie dance.

Rebrand, rebrand.

Let's do it.

DJ, give me a beat.

Ooh, gurdy, gurdy, gurdy, gurdy, gurdy.

So they're all dancing.

They're doing all And then it's like, we get like some bits of like the 80s.

What do we think about the 80s?

And it's funny because they, everyone's reminiscing about the 80s.

And we are seeing all of them with photos from the 80s, you know, Gertie.

We see Gertie's photos from the 80s, which are so cute.

And I just love that everyone gives a photo from the 80s, except for Marisol.

Marisol is just like a picture of her from like 10 years ago, but at an 80s party.

Oh, I was going to say, Marisol's always looked like this.

Oh, I assume it was.

It could have been.

i felt like it was just her dressed up for the 80s i don't think it was actually marisol in the 80s no i was wondering about that picture and alexia is like um in the 80s miami was caliente i was dating a cocaine cowboy and i didn't even know that he was a cocaine cowboy it was crazy oh okay these are crazy i had no idea

Yeah, that's crazy.

And then also then for Larsa, we don't even see a picture of Larsa.

Instead, we see a picture of John Bon Jovi because she's like, I'm not going to show you a picture of my old face.

Like, so you have to look at John Bon Jovi instead.

I was like obsessed with John Bon Jovi.

Like, they're like, well, that doesn't seem like your type, Larsa.

And she's like, yeah, he was definitely my type back then.

Like,

Larsa,

yeah, I don't believe it.

But Larsa seems to be dating a new man.

I saw her holding hands with a guy, and then I looked him up, and he went to Columbia University.

And I just was like, I just was trying to imagine what those conversations are like.

I just can't imagine Larsa and this guy having

much.

Who is it?

He's like a guy who, I think he's like a basketball player,

but I don't think he's in the NBA, but he's just some guy.

It's like John something or another.

I'm looking at Larsa's boyfriend.

Larsa's boyfriend, former pro basketball player, Jeff Kobe.

Jeff Kobe.

I'm like, John something or another.

John Bon Jovi.

His name is John Bon Jovi.

If you've ever

seen him before.

Yeah, like I'm really into him.

So then,

sorry, now I'm looking at, now I'm looking at stupid Jeff Kobe.

Okay, so then we get to Mary Sol, and she's like, yeah, I believed it.

Believe it or not, in the 80s, I worked out.

I was a teenager, but I was always in the back because I didn't want anyone watching me.

So then Lars is twerking

and there's no movement in that butt, which is really funny.

She's kind of like this zero.

That butt does not move at all.

Whatever she got put in there is extremely firm

it looked not unlike on below deck when they got too close to another boat and they have to drop a fender off the side i was like oh

so then uh we hear just like more like 80s music and stuff and stephanie's like in the 80s i was like four i was like in diapers

and masud he was in college

that's funny right we all care about that everyone loves masud humor right we all care about him let's go to show him up bizarre

gross so then um the instructor's like, okay, see, you all sailors, you did it.

Even the heaving hag in the back.

Hey, wait a minute.

So he jump kicks as you do.

And Mary Soul's like, all right, ladies, excellent work.

Wow.

Everybody did move in.

I love that.

Oh, that's why I love the 80s.

The 80s was the best time, man.

God, who didn't love the 80s?

I'm like raising my hand.

Like,

gay people.

Thank you.

I personally.

You did?

Okay.

Well, I mean, I was a closeted young child of the 80s.

So it was a little bit of a different experience for me.

But, okay, I'll just move on from that.

So Gertie is like, I'll make it all dark.

I know.

I was like, oh my guys, the 80s was the darkest time in history.

Loved it.

So they're talking about dinner.

Larza and Lisa met, or, you know, they had the two separate groups of dinner.

So Larza's was good.

And Gertie's like, yeah, we were reflecting on things within the group, obviously.

And you and Lisa.

And I think that's a step forward.

You know, the way that we talked about it is a step forward, even though you didn't talk about it, but we talked about it, which felt like a good step.

It was a good step.

I had a good time.

Guess what, everybody?

I've made up with Larsa and Lisa.

Well, how are you feeling about that situation, Pips?

Because we talked about it too.

Was her like, like, what did she say?

Like, well, I'll be, I was going to be honest with her and told her, like, how much longer are like, are we going to do this?

Okay, because it's getting boring.

Okay.

We have to have a season finale coming up.

We need to wrap this up.

It's getting stupid.

Okay.

And you know, you know, it's gone on way, way too long.

It's way too long.

Too much.

You know, the thing that I hate the most are storylines that go on too long.

Oh, Dod.

Don't.

Don't.

All right, can you do this, Larza?

Because I feel like your wheels are spinning.

I can just, looking at you, it's like waiting for an old-timey elevator.

I'm just watching a needle pass random number.

Are you here?

Are you here?

It's like a spinning beach ball when my Mac is about to shut down.

Are you here?

Are you here?

Now, to be fair, your face does look like a Toyota hubcap these days, so it's not hard to see the wheel.

But, you know, say, please, explain yourself, Larsa.

No, no, no, but like, like, I'm feel like X, Y, Z.

Like, I feel like I've been there, but like, I'm saying, like, she really isn't a responsive friend, you know, like she's not responsive.

I'm like, hello?

Like, I'm checking for like breath under her nose to make sure she's even breathing because like she doesn't respond.

All right, we're going back to details again pips like no details okay who cares about details if we cared about details well then i'm sure steve would i don't know i don't know what i'm trying to say i was trying to form a joke there but sometimes you just reach out and there's just nothing there okay details we don't like details i'm friends with both of you and i really believe that like both of you want to fix this i do even though both of you are like i hate that and like i think like you really like want to fix it i get it i do i do you know what lars and nisa both have to shut up and like not talk about the past anymore anymore.

They just have to say, you know what?

I'm sorry.

I was not so, I'm so sorry I hurt you.

I want to fix this.

But if they start talking about the past, like they're just going to get into a fight again, you know?

I just worry that you're not going to be able to help yourself.

I mean, drop the fucking details.

Am I right?

Right, Gertie?

She's like,

yep.

Yep.

That gets a big gurdy nod.

Totally.

Big girdie nod.

Big girdie nod.

So then on the outside, Kiki and Julia are lounging and Kiki's like, oh my God, my vagina needs some vitamin C.

She spreads her legs out.

And Stephanie's like, oh my God, howdy, that's a nice pose.

That's what we call banter with new girlfriends.

I'm learning.

My vagina needs a light.

So I'm giving it the light right now.

So they're all saying hello and stuff.

And Stephanie's like, oh,

waiter person, is that a mimosa?

Okay, so is that fresh squeezed?

Yeah, because I'm allergic to the ones that are not.

I break in the hives and I go like, wah,

must be fresh squeeze.

No one, you are not.

Shut up.

The only people breaking down into hives are any, any server who has to serve you, Stephanie.

Girl, they not have time for this.

They've got thousands of people to serve, ma'am.

So the server just nods at her.

She goes, awesome.

Thank you.

Great.

God, I'm not going to have to have a poor person version of a mimosa.

Thank the Lord.

Although we call them

Shoma, says six with a Shoma in there.

Anyone?

So now they're deciding that they need to do something for Adriana's birthday, even though she doesn't want it.

And Julia's like, well, I talked to her about birthday.

She doesn't want to celebrate.

And then Gertie and Adriana come over, and Gertie's like, oh my God, this is so nice.

Look at this, Stephanie.

What are you, nautical Stephanie?

Now, this is nautical Stephanie.

I love nautical Steph.

Crazy times.

Everyone's like, Are we still doing the Nautical Stephanie thing?

Yes.

But everyone I see the audience says that.

So Adriana sits down.

She's like, ah, I'm sitting down, old sad, old sad, sitting down.

Like, okay.

She's very, very down in the dumps.

Although, you know, what was shocking, what we find out later on, which I didn't realize, that Adriana is turning 59 and like, holy smokes.

That, I mean, if I could ever, if I could age as well as Adriana is aging, I would be a happy person.

That she, she looks pent up.

Well, that's why why it's confusing because, you know, I get the whole aging thing, especially for a beautiful woman, you know, like I get it.

I totally do.

But I'm also watching it like, you're fucking stunningly gorgeous.

And I can only feel so bad for you because you still have like ultimate pretty privilege.

Like, I'm sitting over here, like, playing with my muffin top, like, staring at you cry about,

I can't, I can't with you.

Get over it.

You're gorgeous.

Stop it.

So, um,

the Marius all comes over and saying, oh,

oh, how was the workout?

Oh, it was so fun.

Alexia didn't even recognize me.

It's crazy.

Yeah, well, you know, Gurdy's got rhythm.

You know what?

She doesn't have a nickname for me.

I've given a nickname to everyone except for Gertie.

So let's choose that for a second.

I'm still workshopping it.

How about I call her?

Rhythmer.

She's got rhythm.

So rhythm.

Hey, Riddy.

Riddy.

Is that going to catch on anyone?

Riddy?

No.

Sky Riddy?

Gerd.

I think that's a disease.

I'm not going to call her that.

So then we go to Lisa, Lisa, Lisa,

while everyone else is cheering, but Lisa is sitting by herself and texting on her phone.

And she's like, hey, Larsa, can't you meet me by the bard?

We should talk.

You know where Larissa is?

You have like, you know, you have like an air tag on or normally.

And Stephanie's like, well, I mean, last I heard she was talking to Lisa.

My God, should we check to see if anybody's floating overboard?

Oh, my God.

Can Larsa even swim?

Oh, God, Larsa, floats.

Are you kidding me?

Larza won't float.

Adriana chuckles in the side.

She's like, okay, for love of that.

So they get their drinks.

And so Larsa and Lisa.

So they get drinks.

And

Lisa's got a bunch of drinks.

And she's like, wait, like, these are all like yours, like?

Well, I wanted to detox and retox.

So I got a green smoothie and then some wine.

So what do you want from me?

Oh, my God.

I don't don't know why i'm so nervous right now i'm so nervous don't be nervous like relax like i'm not nervous i just had a i don't know why i'm nervous but i want to let you know i'm not nervous but i'm nervous oh i just have anxiety okay you know i don't want this i think it's terrible i think it's gone too far and i don't want to get to a point where there's absolutely no coming back okay

like same

yeah well i i just think i think we gotta stop though gotta stop Okay, okay, like, I know, like, you were going through, like, a lot, like, and I feel like you said, like, things to me, like, that, like, were like, I don't know, like, like, they, like, hurt me to my, like, bone, like, like, honestly, like, and, like, I don't want to like go through all of it, like, but, like, I think you're saying that you know the paparazzi that I hired, like, that was, like, really crazy, because, like, I didn't, like, hire, like, paparazzi.

That was, like, really crazy.

So then, we see three hours earlier.

To move on, we just can't go back to talk about these things.

Okay.

You're sure you're not going to talk about the things?

Okay.

Okay, let's go to three hours ahead.

But, like, I'm talking about like the things like.

So then they have this moment where like, like Larsa takes off her sunglasses and then Lisa takes off her sunglasses.

They're like, they're going to look at each other eye to eye.

Lisa's like, how many times have we tried?

We've been over this, over, over all the entire world talking about this, trying to fix this, literally the entire world.

And we see Milan and Seville and Miami, all the times they've talked about this.

And then

we come back here to the boat and Lisa is like, look, I think for us to get so angry, it's because there are a lot of feelings there.

I don't want to ever say Jodi's name again, but like, we know we, you know, we come as a pair.

We've been together for a while now.

And I don't want you two to have a thing when we're all together.

I hate it.

All right.

It makes him so stressed, he almost opened his jaw.

Yeah, like me too, like, and like, I don't want to make you sad, like, because that's not my like intent, like, Shin, you know?

And, like, I feel like we've been, like, friends for so long, and we've, like, had so many, like, good times.

Like, oh, my God, I'm crying I'm crying I'm sorry but like I don't want you to cry like so now they had and they decide their friends are done okay I'm like I'm sorry talk like about your boyfriend but like I'll never like talk about him again okay like okay I also want to apologize because I unfollowed you so I'll go back on here and refolly you unfollowed me like that is like devious that's like diabolical like

Such a prat like like just so you know like that was like bratish you're such a prat oh my god thank you so much much like that is honestly like what i've always aspired to be not like the doll i mean like a brat oh oh yeah well sorry i'm following you now

yeah but like if i knew that you weren't like following me like i would have taken like all your photos off too like and then like i've got like a lot of photos if you like so like i that would have been a lot of photos you're so funny

So now we go back to everybody else.

And girls, I rented all the spa, the entire spa.

You can have whatever you want.

It's on dick.

All right.

Oh, guys, girls, Larissa just wrote back to my Shoma Bazaar phone.

Okay, guys.

Okay, ready?

And it was like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

She goes, I made up with Lisa.

I'm on the deck.

Oh, wow.

Wow.

Congratulations.

It finally happened.

My God.

Thank you, baby Jesus.

So now we can all have dinner together tonight.

I like it.

This is good.

You know, I'm going to wear red tonight because it's a scarlet night, girls.

Okay, well, now maybe that we need now that everyone's getting up, maybe we need to touch base with Stephanie's situation and you, Alexia, maybe you could fight.

Oh, well, I feel like I always get blamed for everything.

And it was really more Mary Soul that was so adamant about me not going.

And you just let her off the hook.

And Mary Soul's like, wait a minute.

I'm sitting right here.

I'm sitting literally right here.

I'm shaking with this accusation.

Oh, wait, it's just one of those weights from the aerobics earlier.

Oh, God, this thing is like a penis.

Absolutely shaking.

Hold on.

I'm better.

Okay, I'm better.

It really hurt me, Stephanie.

Okay.

And she's like, well, I was hurt too.

And I think we should talk about it by ourselves.

So

she's like, me and Alexi about heads because we're both alphas.

Listen, for everyone to make up, we all come together.

We're removing, I'm going to remove one piece of clothing for everyone who makes up.

And Julia's like, oh, you're going to be naked pretty soon.

I don't want to see your tits anymore, man.

God, bro.

I've had enough titties.

Oh my god, you know, my tits are the best tits you've seen.

They're great, but I've seen enough of them.

Show me your dick.

I'm already showing you mine.

We're on his boat right now.

Hi, Dick.

Hey, is Dick connected to any of these cameras here, like the guy who owns all the Cheesecake Factory?

You know, I hear the guy who owns the Cheesecake Factory stares at those cameras in his underwear all day.

Isn't that crazy?

Hi, Dick.

You and your tiny whinies.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I'm going to go to the bathroom.

Does anyone have a walker for the old lady?

So, Adriana, she just sadly leaves to go to the bathroom.

And Philip's like, guys,

since Adriana stepped out, maybe that's a moment we can talk about her birthday.

What are we going to do tonight?

Should we make a cake that has her name written out in big letters and says, oldie old face over here.

It has an arrow pointing to her.

Can we do that?

Sure, we can get her a cake, hopefully made with cyanine or something like that.

Just remember, yesterday she said nothing for birthday.

Well, we have to do it.

Whether she says she wants to or not, we're going to do it.

I love it.

I love it.

I love cakes.

I love birthdays.

I love Adriana.

We're going to do it all.

It's going to be crazy.

The people are people are going to be like, what did that lady have a birthday and get a cake?

Wow.

That's nuts.

That's nuts.

Should we get her an oval teen-flavored one?

What do you guys think?

Cheritol.

Let's go to the spa.

So, um, Marisol and Alexi arrive, and it's the redemption spa.

Okay.

Only sinners around in here.

Yeah.

So they go in this really very large spa and uh they're all like doing spa stuff and everything.

It's like mud, like it's organic mud.

And everyone's everyone's relaxing, et cetera.

And Marisol.

What is non-organic mud?

Is there non-organic mud?

Or mud is organic, isn't it?

It's dirt and water.

Like, what the fuck

is fake mud?

Sure, there's some non-organic mud around here.

So then they're going to get some beverage, and Marisol's like, well, you know, a similar drink to a screen driver that you would like.

You know, what you should get?

You guys should get a Harvey wall banger, which then leads to like a five-minute bit about like, who can say wall banger?

Wallbanger, wall banger.

I will say there was one time I went.

Do you say it?

one time.

I went to a restaurant and I was like, hi, Reservation Under Mandelker.

They go, Wallbanger?

I was like, no.

And

I thought that was like the funniest thing in the world when it happened.

I was like, they thought my name was Wallbanger.

Little did I realize

I was setting up lore to tell on a real household of Miami recap.

God, life.

Look what the world does.

Oh, the direction is life can take you.

That was a real wallbanger.

I'm a

real wallbanger.

I actually really enjoy a Harvey wall banger but you have to have a very specific i think you have to have galeano to have make a good wall banger and who wants to have a specific galiano around

so the other girls come and kiki's like oh my god i'm going into this tub i'm going in and it's a hundred degree tub and so she's sitting in there and then stephanie comes oh look it's mighty mouse hi mighty mouse hey mousey mighty mighty mouse i'm trying it on

my mouse mighty mouse hi mighty hey mighty mighty's here girls look Look at Mighty.

She's here.

Mighty.

Mighty Mouse.

Mighty Mouse.

So though, Kiki goes from the hot tub into the cold tub.

Oh, my God.

She's so brave.

Let me tell you.

That's crazy.

Going from the hot to the cold like that.

Oh, my God.

What is she even doing over there?

So Adriana comes.

She's like, hello, ladies.

It's me.

Her pouting is so hilarious this episode.

But also, I read that this happened right after Bravo,

not Bravocon, obviously, but like FanFest.

You know how they have those FanFest things and all that cast went and then they went straight from that to this.

So I'm wondering if something happened at FanFest that upset her.

Maybe.

Maybe she had just found out that she won't be a full-time cast member or something.

I was actually watching FanFest.

We've got a new announcement at FanFest.

We're dumping Adriana.

It's like, wait a minute.

But yeah, I wonder if she got like asked a nasty question or if they got into a fight there that she can't talk about because it's weird.

What did you do out there, listener who was at fan fest he did something what did you do come tell us in the comments

it was dereed somehow so uh they there so she's she's moping around you know and then um larsa and lisa walk in holding hands are like oh wow wow the band's all back together we got our two dumb dumb lead singers here too they're all hugging And Larsa's like, I feel so much better.

Like, like, oh, is it, is it like a heavy weight that's got, what did you call me?

Oh, sorry.

I won't

let me rephrase that.

Hey, just get a conky.

Step right over to Mary Soul's bar, pimps.

Oh, God, it's beautiful.

It's like a bride and groom walking in after their wedding.

My heart is melting.

My heart melted a long time ago.

Who are we, Kenny?

My face is still on.

That's really all I ask for.

So now Alexia and Stephanie are going to go to the mudroom together for a talk.

Yes.

And meanwhile, Julia is massaging Mary Soul and Larza's feet.

And Julia's like, oh, I cannot believe I am massaging the most famous feet in America.

And after this, I go home and I massage the most famous hoof in America.

Got, goat hoof.

And we see a flashback of Larza saying, there's this like guy who like was a correctional officer in Minnesota.

And he was like, oh, like there was like this fight in prison.

And I felt so bad that he'd like had such a hard day at work that I started sending him a whole video and yeah i paid my mortgage so like

oh god not the toe squeeze oh it's like little kittens licking my toes oh i love it so much which then made me think of serial mom with that dog looking at ladies

feet while she was watching annie so then uh kiki they're just talking about this so Now Gertie is a drowness with Gurdy.

Gurdy's like, oh my God, I feel like I haven't had a spa day like this in so long.

Like just to relax, you know, and one thing that we love to talk about when we are relaxing at a spa is going to therapy.

God, couples therapy.

I'm doing so much of it.

Now I got to do my own therapy because I got trauma, trauma, I tell you.

Are you relaxing yet?

Adrian, are you relaxing yet?

Therapy, trauma, trauma, trauma, trauma.

Well, it's depression, but it's kind of like relax.

Good.

Good.

I'm going to therapy.

Oh, well, I'm glad I sat by you.

So then Gertie tells us that she's learned through therapy with Russell that she probably needs to go to solo therapy and work through a lot of her stuff.

And so then

she's scared to do it.

But now let's go to the main event in the mud room.

So Alexia comes in to Stephanie rubbing mud all over herself.

She's like, is that organic, man?

I hope so.

Okay.

Alexia does not have her microphone on, which I'll never forgive her for because the entire scene, she sounds like this.

Oh, well, you're not Peter.

No, what I've heard about Merry Story is like she's

like, oh my God, put your microphone on, Alexia.

So Stephanie's like, I can't believe we're the ones that decided to do this.

I guess we are somewhat alike.

We're both alphas, right?

Yeah, I guess we'll do, you know?

I'm glad that we get this time alone from the group, from everyone's opinions, because like a lot of opinions and we're alphas, right?

Right.

Right.

Yeah, for whatever reason, like we're always doing great.

And then like something happens.

And in this case, the Sevilla trip, you really hurt me because I wasn't expecting that.

I wasn't expecting it.

Well, I'm really glad that you were, I'm really glad that we're talking about this because what happened from my point of view as someone who works in business with 80 men all around them all the time, when I left that night at dinner, I was very upset and I got in the car.

And the first thing I thought was, oh, I thought it would be Larsa who'd be coming to me, but it was Alexia Marisol who came with me.

And I was like, oh, because they're my friends.

I saw you as my friends.

Okay.

And then we have a flashback of me thinking you were friends.

But then you showed me with actions that you were going to my safe space.

And I get up.

You're going to be safe, a safe space like the Shoma Bazaar.

And I hear you're not coming on the bus.

And I'm like, you're not the Shoma Bazaar after all.

This is actually just bizarre.

And Julie gets up and says, they're not coming because you have too many rules and they feel like you're going to leave them stranded and on top of that they think you're very bossy oh well we do think you're bossy yeah that's true

i love alexia does that all the time oh yeah yeah well we do think that

Well, Stephanie thinks that if she confronts people and says, like, it hurts my feelings, that they're going to be like, no, no, we don't think that.

No, no, your stuff about the plane was totally normal.

The fact is, you are bossy and you were an asshole about that plane.

And I love that both Alexia and Mari Marisol are like,

no,

like, yeah, we, you are bossy.

So, uh, Stephanie just looks at her like, oh, and she goes, well, look, I was scared that we would go on the plane and then something would happen, you know, because like the thing is, we never know, you know, like we're good and then we're not good.

And so that was kind of like my thing, you know.

And then Mary Sol had way more other things, you know, like a lot of things, like a whole bag of things about it.

But, you know, like you had lunch with Adriana and that really bothered Mary Soul.

She didn't like that.

So that's what this is really about because I was like, wow, what way to stab your friend in the back?

What the hell?

That's crazy and amazing to see.

I loved it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You know what?

Larsa introduced me to the group.

However, I wanted to get to know the girls.

I wanted to get to know Adriana myself.

And I'm sad that Marisol felt a certain way about me going to lunch with Adriana.

Okay.

If there's a problem with me getting along with somebody just because you don't get like to get along with them, is that a problem?

Because like, I feel like like she's the one that has more of a problem with me and i thought it was you all this time but alexi and marisol are famous on this show for drawing those lines in the sand where they're like nope sides here are the sides you know and if you're not on this side then go inside then go back inside to the horrible horrible text on the screen you know so stephanie's like oh you know i felt like she's the one that has a problem with me now like i thought it was you she's all like marisol and i mean like we're two different people you know but just so you know like i'm the one that has has a bigger mouth, you know, so I'll say it.

But like, she always thinks like me, if not even more like me.

Like, she thinks so much like me, she was thinking things I wasn't even thinking, you know?

What I'm trying to say is, if I say something, she always has my back.

And if she says something, I have her back, but we'll throw her under the bus because I can do that because I'm

a main cast member and star and she's friends of.

Yeah, like I don't have to do that in the mud room, you know?

And I'm all about the truth, you know, like whether it's truth, like somebody else's truth, I'll say it.

so then um back in the other room marisol's like guys i'm so nervous that stephanie and alexia are trapped in a soundproof room and we can't hear her yelling i mean what are we supposed to how am i supposed to hold this against somebody if i don't know what they're saying

yeah fine i need a real wall banger to knock down that wall so we can hear something am i right so

alexa's been yeah sorry back to the mud room i was gonna say alexia just says that marisol does not like confrontation at all so this is not surprising

so she's like i woke up that day and stephanie and I wanted to go and I was like, Mary Sol, you know, please let's go.

Like, I don't want to do this.

It's always the ones you least expect.

Yeah, I don't want to do this.

You know, I didn't feel good about myself because like, I don't like to hurt people.

You know, I'm so sorry.

I hurt you, but it was Mary Sol who did it.

Oh, you are.

Okay, I know I keep saying

that.

It's great.

I love it.

I love how I like to just like, Marisol is like such a punching bag because she has to.

ran and take it.

She's a friend of if she ever wants to advance on this show.

She just has to play along.

So Stephanie goes, okay i'm gonna keep on saying this and i know it's it's it's and it's a positive although but it's not it's not a negative but it sounds like a negative but like it's a positive like you actually remind me of my sister but at the same time i feel like my sisters don't even realize like they don't they truly don't even realize how much they hurt me and i'm like does alexi even know that she's hurting me unintentionally like my sisters are such bitches they're like two c words like two c words on top of each other like if you put them back to back it would make an o because it's two c's together like they're really like the worst people in the world but really take it positively okay because you remind me exactly both of them together well I can relate to you about that about your hurt because like I have the same situation with my sister.

I do.

Ever since my mom died, I can't, like, like I talk to her now, but like for two years, we didn't talk any results.

She's like, oh my God, your sisters hate you?

Yeah, they hate me so much.

Oh my God.

So we're like sisters.

So why don't you be the sister that hates me and I'll be the sister that hates you?

Okay, so we can still hate each other?

Yeah, like sisters.

Oh my God, this makes me feel so much better.

So now I know why Alexia doesn't like Stephanie.

This is going to be Alexia's storyline.

I have a sister who doesn't like me.

So Stephanie's like, you know, I don't talk to my sisters.

Yeah.

So yeah, I didn't even realize this, or I had forgotten that she had a sister, but apparently they just, Alexia doesn't talk to her sister either.

Which now they're bonded over sisters that hate them, which is so fucking funny to me.

Alexia really is the Simpsons of housewives.

Like it's like Alexia did it first.

It always happened to Alexia first.

Yep.

So now Julia, Larza, and Stephanie are are walking together and they run into lisa and she's taking selfies in the hallway of course

and uh stephanie's like how did you beat us and so the produce she goes who guess who's the first one ladies me

and uh the producer's like wow so how are you on time these days what did you start doing differently lisa and she's like well i set a timer for everything that i do to get ready And it takes 30 minutes to do my makeup.

And I have someone do my hair.

And that usually takes an hour.

And then to get dressed and pick out the outfit, that's 30 minutes.

Plus put on my shoes, put my jewelry on, clean my jewelry off.

That's another 20 minutes.

And I edit it all up.

And now that I know, now I know how long it takes me to get ready.

It's like three hours, right?

It doesn't say three hours at the bottom.

Yeah, it says three hours.

But then she's just such a ding bat.

I love that.

She's like, well, it was very, she actually got a stop clock and did it, you know.

I like that it like finally dawned on her that like, if she wants to be on time, she should actually consider how much time it takes to do the thing she wants to do before she has to be somewhere

so now people come uh join them at the table and gertie has these like lace rabbit ears on with a lace thing covering her eyes yes

gertie can you see me where you're going like what is this like this is crazy like

i think gurdy like missed the memo like for the attire for like the evening because she looks like she's going to a swingers swingers party in Fort Lauderdale.

And I was like, wow.

I don't know what the politics are.

And by politics, I mean social politics are between like Fort Lauderdale and Miami, but I just have to sense that like someone from Miami saying

you look like you're going to a party in Fort Lauderdale had to be one of the most withering things you can say.

Yes.

Is that like saying to someone in Manhattan, wow, where are you going?

Staten Island?

Because the way she said Fort Lauderdale, I was like, oh shit.

I don't even fully understand the dynamics of that disc, but I know it was scathing.

Yeah, Lauderdale just got burned, baby.

So, okay, I'll start a conversation.

When was the last time any of you got laid?

Two days ago.

Two days ago.

I know you want to know what, like, everyone wants to know.

Like, when I got laid.

Yeah, everyone really wants to know, sis.

Everyone wants to know.

Like, my sister never tells me.

So you please tell me so we can like mend the sister relationship.

And Marisol's all annoyed.

And so Kiki's like, oh, wait, do you know something we don't know, Marisol?

Well, I only have one sexual partner.

And the last time we saw each other was probably Wednesday or Thursday night.

So

I guess then.

Booty call.

No, no, it's not a booty call because he's my husband.

Okay, so don't call it a booty call.

I don't like that, you know?

It's not the walk of shame because that's my husband.

Okay.

I'm joking.

I'm joking.

Right, but you know I'm very sensitive and that's my husband.

So you say walk of shame and you say booty call and then you know what's going to happen, you know?

And I'm going to put my heads kind of sideways and not very fast while I blink more slowly.

Okay.

That's what's going to happen.

I'm going to get very sensitive about it.

Julia's telling us that hearing that Alexia had sex with Todd two days ago, she's like, oh, well, clearly our plan to get our thoughts away from Todd didn't work out so well.

No, it didn't work out so well, especially because you spent no time on the screws whatsoever trying to lure her away into the arms of another man or anything like that.

You've spent literally no effort trying to get her to not think about Todd.

But yeah, but either way, Alexia's like, my husband.

My husband.

Absolutely, my husband.

I step with my husband.

It's right.

It's my husband.

So, did you guys argue at all?

No, zero arguing.

What about you, girls?

Did you argue?

Why are you asking me if I argue?

Did you?

Nurse is like, no, no, like I didn't like argue.

Like, guys, I love this.

It's beautiful.

I can't believe you pulled it together.

Look at Lisa and Larson getting along, everything.

I mean, we're actually getting along.

I didn't know you guys could do it.

You really impressed me.

I'm just so happy.

And to Mighty Mouse, our new edition.

We love you, Mighty.

We love you.

All's well and ends well.

I'm so proud that I was able to orchestrate this wonderful season finale.

All right.

Cheers, everyone.

We're going to keep on filming Marisoul.

That's okay.

So now Stephanie is like, Mary Soul has two faces.

And depending on which you're facing, you get a different story because one face is one thing and then the other face says another thing because she's got two faces.

So then Adriana is sitting there, Moby.

So they throw like a napkin at her oh yeah come on smile whatever she's like oh but then the cake comes and has a microphone on it it's like really cute and it's like yeah happy birthday happy birthday

and everything's like great and wonderful and every like adriana is finally smiling and then they look at the cake and the cake says 32 times two minus five equals 59.

How is that supposed to make it any better?

How is that?

You're still putting, first of all, you're still putting 59 onto the cake.

But you're just adding Mary Saul totally ordered this cake 100%.

Mary Saul ordered this.

And Grinny's like, who didn't pick up the memo that she hates her birthday and she wants no part of it?

And now we've got a whole numerical system happening on top of the birthday cake.

Come on.

Come on.

Did not help things.

Oh my God, what boring salt on the flame.

Like salt on the wound.

Oh my God, someone got wounded.

No, it's an expression.

What?

Oh,

so Adriana just flashes them them the bird.

And so now it's time for boys, guys.

So handsome men come in and they've got shop trays and light sticks.

And so Adriana's like, I don't know who did this cake and why because I hate this cake, but it's nice that the girls did it.

Guys, we're going to go to the Scarlet Party now.

So they go to a poolside dance party and everyone's danced in red.

And they have a great time, guys.

And the cruise ends on a high.

Oh.

But the season continues because now we're back in Miami and we're in Julia's home and she needs some diapers

for the goat.

For the goat.

Yes.

So then we go to Lisa's house and she's getting a congressman haircut for her son, Logan.

And God, that guy is just a little Lenny, isn't he?

He's really.

He really is.

He's just a little tiny Lenny.

He's like, hey,

ma, get me a conservative haircut and also get me a voice teacher for my new girlfriend.

She's going places.

Have you seen that?

I think Kiki Ben.

No, I

Lenny

put on Instagram like, hey, give me a, get me, anyone know what talented voice coaches in the Miami area?

People are like, oh, no, he's got this new, you know, five, you know, 20-year-old girlfriend, or what I was going to say, five, that's creepy, 20, which is creepy, but it's not five creepy.

20-year-old girlfriend or whatever.

Five plus five plus five plus six minus one.

Yeah.

And he gives her a vocal coach because he's going to make her a singer he's going to make her into a famous singer so then she put herself on instagram singing and she's got the big headphones on and like a a vocal mic with a spit guard or whatever and she's like somewhere over the rainbows yeah

somewhere over the rainbow

or whatever she's singing and it's just so Lenny.

Oh my God.

We're going to make you a star, kid.

Total Lenny.

Sell it.

Then

Kiki's driving around in her Land Rover and she calls Shamar,

who's not picking up.

And so her daughter summers the back saying, like, what happened to Shima?

She's like, I do not know.

Shama is kissing a girl.

And she's like,

Shama is kissing a girl.

How do you know?

She smiles.

It's cute.

It's funny.

It's heartwarming.

So then Russell and Gertie go to therapy.

So they go in and meet with the doctor and Gertie's like, you know, I should have done this a long time ago, but like it's never, oh, this is not couples therapy.

Russell's just driving her to her therapy.

Right.

So this is her first day at singles therapy.

And I was like, what kind of therapy is this?

Because you walk in and there's just like a bunch of lotion bottles and Kleenex.

And I was like, oh, it's like gay guy therapy.

But then I realized it was probably like hand sanitizer.

Yeah, and there was like a little, the, the doctor's desk had like a little thing that said the anger volcano and it had like this volcano exploding.

And it was like all these like rage, like fury, resentment.

I was like, oh, I love a therapist who loves visual tools.

Yeah.

This is a word art therapist.

There was a big pillow on the couch and it said something like, healing vibes, loving vibes.

Yeah.

Feeling vibes or whatever.

Very, Ianla Van Zandt.

I remember with Starting Over, she once had someone in the Starting Over house.

In order to get over the luggage that she brought or the baggage that she had, not the luggage, the baggage she had in her relationship, they had her like carry actual luggage across the driveway and was like, there,

you've left your luggage behind.

You've been carrying it.

Now put it down.

Now keep walking.

And God, I love that show.

There's a generation of people that do not know about starting over and all the literal visual therapy they would do on that show of like

the time they brought one lady.

They had they put one lady into a courtroom and had a mannequin that represented her be like her prosecutor or something like that.

And the judge was Dela Reese.

It was just

Dela Reese.

That was one of the therapies.

That was real therapy right there.

Back when therapy meant something.

So Gertie is saying.

Yeah.

I was about to say this, this therapist seems fine.

Yeah, I mean, I mean, Dela Reese isn't here, so you're kind of failing.

But thanks for the hand sanitizer.

Okay.

So

talk about what brought Gertie here and she's saying that

basically she's saying, you know, she was can't, she was cancer-free now, you know, and she, it was like amazing girl power and all that, but she wakes up and she sees her body and she's like, oh my God, I didn't ask for this.

Like, where's my body?

What are all these changes?

And

so she's like, no, I think you need to go back further to your original trauma, like your earliest traumas, because obviously it started way before this.

So Gertie talks about how her and her brother came to America and they were told they're going to stay with quote-unquote family, but she's like, I don't know these people.

And then they get stuck there.

They don't know the language.

They weren't even allowed to leave their room.

Kids were mean.

They made fun of her name.

They made fun of everything about her.

They would come diss her to her face.

And she didn't even know till later when she asked what things meant because she didn't know the language.

And it just sounds fucking horrible.

My God, the way she was talking about being a little girl and experiencing all that was so sad.

It was a very sad story.

Yes.

And

she also equates it to, not equates it, but she draws a link to like her, what she feels her behavior.

And they sort of show flashbacks of her fighting with Julia and everything and saying that she has certain reactions that seem to be trauma-based, which, you know, I love that she's in therapy and dealing with her trauma, but I also think that Julia was being an asshole.

That's, I think that's so, you don't have, that's, I don't think that has to do with your childhood in the sense of like, you don't have to worry that like you have an unresolved trauma, which like is why you react a certain way.

You, you reacted the right way, which was that Julie was being an asshole and you did the right thing.

Yeah.

So yeah, but she's saying everyone being bullied as a kid in school, you know, which what, and then we see a clip of what happened and it is very bullying, you know, and everybody like, don't talk to gurdy and all that stuff.

I did like the story about her name, though, because it's so gertie.

She goes, yeah, you know, my name was Alicia Ba and they couldn't pronounce it.

So automatically we have bullying with my name, bullying with my name, you know, and so I changed my name.

So now, you know, and I'm thinking, well, if you're like, they're bullying for your name, like the first choice would be Alicia, right?

Because your name is Alicia Ba.

So it seems like he would just switch to alerted.

She's like, I was bullied for my name.

So I went for Gertie.

And I was like, yes, Gertie.

And she's talking about how it's so powerful because now it's her whole brand.

You know, she's taken that and she's turned it into her whole brand.

But it's even hearing the name reminds her that she changed it because she was made fun of for her first name.

That's a lot of sad shit.

I feel bad for her, but I'm glad that she's on the road.

And,

you know, that's therapist basically echoes that.

Now we go to Marisol's house.

Alexia arrives with Frankie because Marisol is having, Marisol and Steve are going to have Alexia and Frankie over.

Steve's going to make, don't worry, Steve's cooking dinner, guys.

Steve like puts out some like varsity soccer team dinner shit of like pasta with like meat sauce and like a iceberg salad on the side.

I was like, okay, very exciting stuff.

Although

I like

to see because isn't he like the gourmet chef or whatever?

Now the pasta sauce did look quite good, but I was surprised that he just poured it over some uncooked pasta.

Like that's not how you do it.

Instead of mixing it all

you got to mix it up there, boy.

You can't just pour sauce on top of the rigatoni.

Come on, bro.

That's why I felt like a sports.

It's a rigophony, sir.

That's why I felt like it was like a sports dinner or something like that, or like the dinners we used to do at my fraternity where we would like, it's like pasta night, and someone like eats up the frozen, you know, garlic bread, and someone makes a giant thing of ragu and then pours it over the chewy pasta.

So

then Marisol doesn't even eat, by the way.

They're all sitting there eating, and of course, has an empty plate.

And she's like,

I had some vegan cheese right before this.

I was like, lady.

You knew you were having guests over for dinner.

Why did you have vegan cheese right before this?

No, I respect it.

You stay starving, girl.

So then

they come in.

Pretend.

I'm like, just pretend.

Just put the food on your plate for the for the show.

Like you're just sitting there.

Like we're watching as an aunt's big white, glaring empty plate in the foreground.

At least, like, just for the symmetry of it all, just put some pasta on there and just give it to Steve later.

So Mary Soul's like, oh, Frankie, how handsome.

Look who's here.

Handsome Frankie.

Am I right, Steve?

What a honey.

Hey, Steve, will you make us a couple of drinks?

And Frankie goes, Mary Soul, a little bit drunk today.

a little bit.

Lexi's like, oh, take it down.

A notchie sing, take it down.

Yes, thank you.

He doesn't even know what he's talking about.

I haven't had a drink all day, Frankie.

Mary Soul, you're talking to a Vaz.

Oh, oh, Frankie, oh, you're over there.

You don't know what you're talking about.

I'm not drunk.

I love her.

She goes, I haven't had a drink all day, Frankie.

And he goes, please.

I'm not only a great bartender.

I'm a great cruise director.

I'm so happy this cruise was fucking awesome.

Thank you, everyone.

Can I be a full-fledged cast member yet?

No, when do we get this to happen?

I took this entire cast onto a free cruise, and you still won't make me a cast member.

Why?

All right.

Well, have you talked about moving in a good direction with Todd, with Peter?

Like, how's Peter reacting to the Todd stuff?

She's like, no, because this has happened so quickly between Todd and I.

You know, it's only been a whole season that I've been back together with Todd, but not telling anybody about it.

So I didn't have time to tell Peter, you know, and we didn't have time to talk about it.

But, you know, he knows I talk with Todd.

And, you know, well, you know, Peter, you know, he's always like very reserved and like he never has anything negative to say.

Well, really anything in a sentence.

He can't really do sentences yet.

But, you know, like he's not said anything.

He doesn't really talk much, right?

Well, he doesn't really have an opinion.

No, he doesn't really.

He doesn't have an opinion.

He doesn't have too many brain cells left either, I have to say.

Like a lot of weed.

A lot of weed happening there.

Well, he just stays to himself.

And that's not good either you know i mean poor favor he can't keep to himself all the time you know you need to go talk to people there's people in the world you need to talk to them how are you going to be upset if somebody goes to lunch if you're not out there being friends with people and going to lunch with them

well and she's like well well you know but soon we'll all be going out together again well what do you mean we're all going out together again you know like us like the old gang like fun times with todd yeah you know like me you steve This is going to be so fun, you know.

Like Todd was just saying the other day, you know, I wish I had some like cooked pasta with some sauce haphazardly poured over it,

preferably from a jar.

And Frankie's like,

Marisol's like, Do you?

I mean, Steve, Steve, do you hear what he's saying?

I'm going to slap you on the arm, Steve.

Steve, do you hear?

And Frank goes, Marisol.

Marisol.

It's like, come on,

come on, Marisol.

Too much.

Oh,

so

let's see.

So then Mary Soul's like, all right, I don't know if we can go on a double day.

Steam's still very upset.

You know, he doesn't like the way that Tom treated Alexia.

And so she's like, okay, so now we got to like him again.

I hurt for you, but my hurt isn't the same as your hurt.

I get it.

Because my hurt, my hurt, I hurt for you.

It's like, well, luckily for me, I'm like past all the hurt, you know, because like it was very hurtful.

It was so hurtful, you guys.

But like, it's painful, but like it was painful for him too you know and when you love each other it's hard to know the other person's in pain you know but now i know you know i was in pain too it was very difficult for todd you you know like of course well you know peter i want marisol to support my decision to be with todd and to spend time with lord but like it's not up to her you know like this is my relationship and she's just a friend of okay and at this point it should be only between him and the star which is me because like we're really putting in the effort to make things work yeah okay well maybe stop sobbing and telling everybody he's a narcissist who's ruining your life and that all narcissists should die.

Yeah.

He's literally texting me right now.

Oh, I'm telling you, there's a listening device there.

I'm telling you, I'm going to end up at the bottom of the Miami River.

This isn't going to end well for me.

Let's go to the Shoma Bazaar, shall we?

So Stephanie walks in and there's like assistants around.

She's like, you, clean up, stand up straight.

You, mop that floor.

You, there's a cobweb.

Go find it and clean it up.

Come on.

Okay, we have one hour to finalize the Christmas party.

Let's do a quick run through of everything we're going to do for the event.

Okay.

Where's that crazy guy with the beard?

Me and Santa?

Yeah, whoever he is.

Where is he?

Where is he?

Is he going to get in here?

He sit over there.

Okay.

Come on.

Show him a bizarre.

We are fun.

We are fun.

Why is this like the lobby of a Hyatt place?

I just don't understand this space.

I don't understand what it is.

Is it a restaurant?

Is it a waiting room for the, for the office?

I feel like it's like a workspace.

It's like a, almost like a we worky kind of space, like that's at the base of like one of these, one of like their apartment buildings.

So like the idea is that like you come down to this sort of common area, you can get food, you can do work.

It's like a, you don't need to leave, you don't need to leave Shoma.

Everything is here.

Don't leave Shoma.

Don't leave Shoma.

Oh, we have Santa Claus, Mrs.

Claus, all of the Christmas trees, the toys for the tots.

Okay, this, there, this, there.

Stop smiling, stop frowning.

Everybody, get it together.

I'm a boss woman.

So then, um,

here comes uh, Audrey.

She's gonna be the entertainment for the evening with her band.

So I'm going to give you a quick rundown of how it's going to go.

Okay.

We have this whole space beer concert.

And she's like, okay, where's the piano?

I want it on the front of the stage because like we have a 10 people band, you know, it's going to be big.

So a full band.

And this is like the best musicians because they're people who work with Emilio Stefan, you know,

they play for all the big names.

Louis Fonzi, Shakira, the best musicians Miami has.

And I'm sure they can't wait to brag about how they also played for a real house off of Miami in the lobby of an apartment building.

They said

the only most recent concert that they played that was more impressive than mine was the board that attached Shakira.

I mean, that's a big deal.

So, yeah, Adriana's like, you know, I work so hard on my music.

I've been writing songs, recording songs, rehearsing the piano.

And Stephanie's like, okay, well, you're going to kill it.

You want to have something to drink?

Okay.

So they sit down.

And she's saying that like

Adriana is saying that she's grateful to Stephanie because she's only known her for a small amount of time, but she's been more supportive than some friends that she's just known for decades.

Yeah, so they are talking about the show a little bit and then they move on to the cruise and why she was so upset.

And she's like, well, there's two things.

One, I miss my boyfriend because he's been in Paris for now like six weeks.

And, you know, I'm a creative artistic type.

So I'm very sensitive.

And I just, when I hear all the constant fighting and the meanness, I just can't take it.

You know, my brain, what are you talking about?

You are the fightiest, meaniest person on the show, by the way.

Please don't change.

But literally everybody is worrying about you because you're not fighting and causing negativity.

Everyone's like, oh my God, Audreyne is not being toxic.

Is she okay?

Yeah, she's like, I just hate being around negativity.

You wrote a letter on behalf of Marisol's liver to Marisol.

Still one of my favorite house-wise moments.

That will always make me laugh.

That was so good.

Play who it was.

That's one of the funniest things that they ever did.

So Stephanie's like, hearing you talk about the art and hearing you talk about the concert, it's like, I'm actually seeing happiness in your face.

You're actually really smiling, which is why I got you a cupcake that says, you're still 59.

Okay.

Oh, good.

Now the smile's gone.

Ah, I feel great.

Happy holidays.

So I had a talk with Alexia and she mentioned in the sauna that Marisol's really upset that you and I hit it off.

And Adriana just gives us a little smile like, of course she did.

You know, she's like, that's very mature.

That's like very high school.

And, you know, like maybe sorority type situation where we can have our clique.

She's like, yeah, but Alexia said verbatim, Mary Sol's the one behind it.

I'm just her mouthpiece.

Okay, that wasn't verbatim, first of all, but close enough.

Yeah.

Adriana's like, oh, what I've been saying for years, Marisol's puppet master, but she needs a mouthpiece and a puppet.

So we see flashbacks of Marisol being a puppet master, which I don't think that Marisol is really a puppet master, but I do think that she is non-confrontational and has Alexia fight her battles.

She's one of the shadiest on this show, I think.

She comes on and acts all nice to everybody.

Why are we finding girls?

But then behind the scenes, she's like, she went to lunch with Stephanie.

Let's make her pay.

We're not going on her fucking plane.

Yeah, she's passive aggressive.

Yeah.

So then she's, Adriana is saying, well, you have to understand Marisol had a PR company that went nowhere.

So she knows how to influence people that go nowhere.

She just uses all this knowledge, you know, she's got so much.

And Stephanie's like, well, that's a horrible way to use your knowledge.

How mad are you that you didn't go on the plane to Marvella?

To Julia's big announcement when I had given the seat next to me the seat on the Shoma plane.

That's a rare seat.

Special people get to sit in that seat.

And I gave it to her and she didn't accept it.

I know what I'm going up against.

And I have a message for you.

The message is, if you're going to come from me, you better hit a bullseye because when it's my turn, I don't miss.

Happy holidays.

Now Stephanie's going to come from Arisol.

I worry for her because that's not an easy task, ma'am.

But good luck.

Good luck to you.

Yeah, seriously.

Well, fun times, fun times on Miami.

Love this show.

And thanks, everyone, for listening.

And we'll catch you on the next episode.

Bye, everybody.

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