#3039 RHOSLC S605 Part Two: Soup-er Troopers

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Hello, and welcome to Watch Our Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.

This is part two of the recap.

If you missed part one, go check out your podcast feed.

It's right there.

And without further ado, let's get right back into the recap.

Meanwhile, Bronwyn has returned to the table and she is shattered from this reading that's like, your mom's going to die.

And she's sitting there like, oh,

she's like, she's like, like she's like not she's like nodding from every body part every body part of hers is nodding she's like

she's like trying to be like cool but she's like

she's nodding and she's trying she's like clearly trying to transition into the my mom's sick you guys

scene where everybody's like oh my god we're women like she's waiting for a heather monologue like we are women who come together for women whose mothers are sick or whatever she's waiting for she's like okay it's what it's a special on me okay okay i'm ready let's shoot it you're short you're so short

okay i'm just going to hold.

I'm going to sit here and vamp with my head nods.

I'm going to just be vamping over here.

You do platforms.

I have platforms.

Okay.

Surely they will notice that I'm crying soon.

Can anybody have me a tissue?

Yeah, here's.

I'm sorry, Bromwyn.

You look shattered, but I'm going to go do my reading now.

Okay, if you want to do a speech, you'll have to wait for me.

Bronwyn needs a tissue.

Just don't hold it up too close to Angie or she'll disappear because she's so short.

You start it, okay?

Angie, you start it.

You start it.

And you can't take anything back.

You start it.

Well, and Angie, have some respect for my event at a winery in Utah that serves enchante while you eat salmon from a waffle cone.

Have respect for my event.

Bitch, those are my cards.

You started it.

You know what?

We're not getting anywhere because you want to believe something horrible about me because it makes you feel better about being short.

I am not short.

I am someone who is tall and you I do tall, you do less tall.

ha

So Whitney's like at this point they'll be haunting each other in the next life They're never gonna shut up.

They both want the last word.

So then Meredith meanwhile

She finally gets she has that moment where your phone has been dead for a while and then you've plugged you plugged it in and suddenly the Apple logo pops up

Wait a second Roland's crying like a little toddler.

You guys

stop it.

You need to stop.

You need to stop for a minute.

You need to stop.

Someone here is crying.

We need to address it.

Rowan, you have the floor.

Yeah.

Well, thank you.

Both my parents are really struggling right now, health-wise.

It's a lot.

And, you know, it's been hard for them to hear Brittany call me a gold digger.

So, you know, thanks a lot for that.

Just a big transition to have my mom living with me.

And I love her so much.

And I don't know.

He said I should make peace with her and i need to figure out relationship i'm just what i'm just trying to say is you guys both of you don't say stuff about people's kids please don't say stuff that's too far there's got to be a boundary because kids like me i was a kid once get damaged do you understand have i brought us together have i healed us all yeah same same same i feel the same that's why i don't want to go low with you and you know what i've even told you that remember when i told you that i don't want to go low with you but i have to go low with you because you're really short that's the only way to talk to you i have to like bend down I have to squat down to talk to her.

That's how short she goes.

Yeah.

This is what she does.

You know what?

She does.

She goes low.

Yeah.

Do you even read what you write on the messages?

Because that was really heartfelt.

It was so hurtful.

You guys, did you hear what Bronwyn just said?

God, she just said her mom.

Her mom.

I wasn't really listening either.

What did Bronwyn just say?

She said that my toddler is is ready for his binky.

So come on, let's hurry it up.

Why didn't your toddler ask me for a binky?

I'm like the head of the binky society.

Why wouldn't you ask me?

I don't want, I don't want to do this.

Okay, I don't want to be here with Bronwyn.

She can leave.

It's like, no, you can leave.

You can leave.

You can leave.

No, you can leave.

You can leave.

You're ruining Bronwyn's crying scene.

No, see, why do you have to do that?

Like, why do you have to fucking do that?

Just like shut up for once, okay?

Cause I want to be here while Bronwyn cries.

Why did you send a nasty ass text why did you send a nasty ass text to begin with you guys look look at britney and i hugging we're even hugging i hate brittany and i'm hugging her while you two ruin each other's lives does nobody understand that psychic just saw todd in a jockstrap

lisa you are such a bitch you say and you won't even listen and now we go to heather's reading and terrence is like hmm I'm going to give you a very specific reading.

Okay, what I'm picking up is rebirth.

Oh, God, Take it back to your birth.

I just got rid of those little bitches.

No, it's rebirth.

Rebirth.

Oh, Reba.

I, no, I never really listened to her music, but I love the idea that I'm going to give birth to her.

Oh, wait.

I'm getting a voice coming through.

It says, how dare you?

Heather Dubrow.

Sorry.

He's like, yeah, I really think that this is a time for you to like take back your power.

Do you feel like love's not working out for you?

Oh, my God.

Even the psychic knows I'm always single what the hell

wow i love that very specific only a psychic could know information he pulled out there by saying that

she needs to take back her power and she's having rebirth and love's not working out for you i can't believe i can't believe he was able to pull out those things those very very specific comments about a lady Yeah, but we really do expect too much of psychics.

I mean, we're all kind of going through basic things, right?

It's like you can sit anybody down and be like, oh my God, I sense that somebody hurt your feelings lately.

You know, of course, we're all going to be like, yes.

I mean, somehow, like the UPS guy,

probably recently.

But, you know, like, we want like really specific things.

You know, it's like, Ronnie, you really need to stop pulling lint out of your belly buttons and then putting it back in there to see how big you can make it get

coming down.

Like, I need something like that you really know me.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

I think also, I always thought a psychic would tell you what's coming in the future, hence psychic.

And,

but, like, for someone to intuit something about me and then just give me advice when they don't even know me, I'm like,

that's fine, but that's not special.

Yeah, I didn't come to friends.

Anyone can do that.

Look at what we do every single day.

You're giving psychic readings on Instagram.

I don't want your advice.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, exactly.

So back to the fighting.

You want this perfect image about you and you want to ruin everyone else.

okay you want to ruin everyone else i never said i'm perfect lisa lisa do you want to stay good with angie you're what you are a dark hades

okay you're you're dark as hazes and it matches your dark hair color she's like oh yeah but you know what you protrude evil you're like you're like an evil that Yeah, you protrude it.

No, you prote it.

I don't.

You do.

You protrude evil.

I'm non-Hades.

I'm anti-Hades.

I'm like...

Protrude evil.

Protrude.

What are you other than even saying right now?

Angie has an evil dent coming out of her head.

That's an evil protrusion.

Do you want to be good with me?

What?

And Angie's like, you are such a cut fitness.

And they're like, oh,

no, no, no, no, no.

You can't say that.

I'm in real estate.

Angie.

Angie, I'm pulling you away.

No.

Pick up my black cards and go to Nordstrom.

Honey.

And

then Lisa's like, honey, I don't shop there.

Yodo.

That's embarrassing to shop at Nordstrom.

You do Nordstrom.

I do

Nordic vacations on a cruise line.

I don't know.

I lost my material there.

Your boyfriend does it for you.

I'm back, baby.

Lisa's like, oh, yeah, yeah.

What about Soupman, Batch?

What about Soupman, Batch?

I started laughing so hard when she said, what about Soupman, bitch?

And then I had to rewind it to make sure that's what she said because I didn't know what she said.

And she did say, what about Soupman, bitch?

And then she just stops and goes, What is Soupman?

Yeah, what is fucking Soupman?

Mary's like, I mean, is there something, isn't there something on Seinfeld with

Brittany's like, Soupman?

Does he know Jared?

Is it a tartare?

Mary's like, is it a tartare?

Because I will not eat that.

The producer asks, what's a soup man?

And Lisa's like, yeah, well, you know what?

I think that's a question for Terrence.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You want to know, ask a psychic about Soupman.

Ask us.

I really hope this is Lisa's version of a Karen Huger on the fly fabrication.

Like when Karen said, like,

what it was, you've got a hot box and everyone in Sing Sing knows it, whatever that was.

And then when she was asked about what was the deal with sing sing she's like i don't know it just sounded good so i said it

what i love that she says say what loose say what soup man is and she's like you know what angie shut your mouth you've got soup coming out of your mouth shorty short soup lover

close your legs to men who have soup so close you can close your legs to soupy men okay

And so then Heather, Lisa tries to go in and Heather's getting her basic reading or whatever.

The guy's like, basic.

That's what the read I'm getting is basic B.

Does that mean anything to you?

That's what they used to call me in college.

You're so talented.

Why is Lisa in here?

And Lisa's like, Sorry, sorry.

Okay.

I'm going to, you know what?

I'm going back out there.

Hey, don't you talk behind my back?

Don't you talk behind me?

Why are you saying I'm using someone's credit card?

Why would you say that?

Because I believe you went on a trip to Greece and used someone else's credit card and had to pay it back.

My cards are all in my name, all of them.

Mary, will you get my credit cards, please?

I want to show her the year I got them.

Stop.

Stop.

Both of you, stop.

I'm fun again.

You said you believe she took another person's credit card for a vacation.

How is that any different from her saying she believes that you took money from America Express, man, and he paid for your Range Rover?

Yeah, she started it.

Yeah, she stopped it.

You stopped it because she started at.

So what about that?

What about that, Veronica Mars?

What about that?

She started at, she started at.

Oh my God, Angie, stop talking.

I solved it for you already.

Hold on.

Guys,

Shantae, am I right?

Guys, we have another bottle that you haven't tasted yet.

There's another bottle coming out.

It's called Francais.

Who wants Francais?

Who wants some Francais?

Oh, so Angie and Lisa are arguing and Lisa's like, I'm going to get prov.

I'm going to get prov.

So then Heather, Heather takes Lisa and literally drags her over to Terrence.

And Lisa's like, shut the fuck up.

Shut the fuck up.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Oh, my God.

Are you reading cards?

I love that.

I love cards.

I love that.

Do you like fresh balls?

I got some new inventory if you want some freebies, y'all.

So Terrence is like, okay, so who's the water sign?

Pisces, Scorpio, Cancer.

Scorpio, how did you know?

It's my husband.

Okay, well, how do you feel?

Why do I feel like you're rebuilding trust?

And she's like, oh my God, I don't know.

I don't know.

Well, it's like an elastic band and you guys keep snapping back together,

which, by the way, that's that's my way of saying, I think you guys are doing the rubber bands wrong.

You're not really supposed to snap them into each other.

Okay, you need to figure out how to communicate with each other again.

Cause I also look at this and I go, you know, it feels like you have different paths.

It's like,

yeah, like when you shoot a rubber band off of a finger and then you go in a different direction, shoot another rubber band off your finger.

It's like two different paths.

I think you're in like rubber band paths.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I feel like it's funny because, like I said, you guys are like a rubber band that snaps back together, but you're also on different paths, which doesn't make any sense because you're either snapping back together or going on different paths.

What do you want to say from this reading?

Yeah, I feel like there's true.

That's true.

But you know what?

This is where I get emotional because I got to stop for a second because I don't want to cry.

Hold on a second.

Okay, I think I got it out of me.

Okay, you know what?

But like marriage is hard like shot like hold on I'm not gonna cry.

Don't make me do it again.

I just feel like I just feel like John's like my best person like he's my and she does that thing where she just takes her finger and like flicks like like a tear.

She's like, yeah, he's like my person, but like I feel like he's there, you know, and like I just thank God every day that John's not short.

Because I really don't like short people, you know?

He's like, yeah, John's your person.

But you're not on the same team.

Yeah, I think that that's true.

I think it's true.

Yeah, we've lately we've been on totally different pages.

And now we see the crises in their marriage.

First, a month ago, John thinks that John thinks that Jack can get an apartment and Lisa doesn't want him to get an apartment.

Yes, your son needs his own apartment.

You want that mop head back in your house?

Oh my God.

I don't even know him anymore.

He wants my son, who is college age, to live independently after he just spent two years living independently in a foreign country?

Oh,

who is this man?

Oh

Yeah, sometimes it feels like we're like on totally different planets and then we see another flashback of John Lisa telling John she feels alone in her feelings and he needs to take things more seriously

and Terrence is like yeah until you get back to your same team you're gonna feel like lost.

She goes oh my god like you know I just feel so alone sometimes, you know?

It's like John says that Justin Baldunny harassed him.

And I'm like, he was just trying to be nice, you know, and now it's like a five-year fight that we can't get over.

So Heather comes back to the table.

Girls, what did I miss?

Well, it was a lot of yelling and a lot of screaming.

And I've just been focusing on the wine and having a great time at the end of the corner at the end of the table.

So Roman's like, okay, someone has to stop.

This is like yelling.

Because

Angie is like now she's seeing red.

She can't even process anything.

And she's like, so she can say things about me and I have to just sit here.

Well, but here's the thing.

You're going back and forth.

They're digging up.

Yes, but I didn't dig up anything on her.

I know.

I'm having your back right now.

But this is who she's always been.

Lisa's always been like that.

And you were with her doing it.

You never had a problem with Lisa doing that.

And Mary's like, amen.

Yeah.

And so now to say, like, I've had enough is just a little bit crazy.

Like, you're fine with the abuse.

So you should love getting abused.

But I've never dug up anything on anyone, Heather.

My biggest thing that I shared with Meredith was that, and then Mary just interrupts her and is like, yeah, but when Lisa would do this, you accepted it when you were her friend.

Yeah.

And Andrew's like, wait, Mary, you've got to hear this.

She goes, no, you got to hear me too, because I'm talking too.

She goes, okay, but no, listen to me.

You always want somebody to listen.

Well, you listen, but you don't ever ever listen.

And I'm saying something.

I have got salmon children inside of me trying to come out.

Do you not get it?

Yeah, she's like, when she was your friend, you went along with it, Angie.

So now Lisa is back, and Angie goes in to get her reading.

Why did I miss?

They keep on saying this.

What did I miss?

Was it more about my face?

More about my business.

I don't have a face left, but I have 12 threads on each side, by the way.

Yeah, yeah.

She's so funny to me.

She's like, Okay, hi, everybody.

I'm back.

By the way, I don't have a facelift, but I do have a lot of threads.

Okay, that's why I look so good.

Okay, everybody, I'm back.

So now we go to Angie and Terrence.

And so he's like, Okay, I see an expansion of your business.

I see yourself wrapping yourself in what looks like a giant leaf and dipping yourself into some sort of a white sauce.

Oh, yes, that is my plan for full body dolma spa facials.

So, yes, how did you know that?

I've only told Sean and Elektra and people in Greece.

This is wild.

I've also got that you're coming out with albums where you just do covers, but you change all of the lyrics to Zorba, Zorba, Zorba, Zorba, Zorba.

Oh, wait, there is one song called Olympia in here.

That's interesting.

Uh, wait, well, I am seeing a track listing for did you ever know that you are my hero?

That's fun.

Did you ever know that you're my gyro?

It's hero.

Sorry.

I've been trained by many jack in the box commercials.

So Angie is, this guy's like, I'm sensing that you're coming out with product, which is a wild thing to say to a real housewife.

And she's like, oh my God, how did he know that I'm coming out with product?

It's like, because you're a real housewife and housewives are always coming out with products.

So Whitney is asking Lisa how it was

the reading.

And she's like, oh, it was good.

It was really God.

Yeah, he hit on some things that with John that were like spot on.

But it's good.

Everything's fine.

Yeah, everything's fine.

She's just smiling.

And everyone's like, what happened to Lisa?

I've never met someone quite like Lisa Barlow, but I probably wasted too many brain cells.

You could just send the sentence there, honestly.

Trying to figure out what the hell.

No, that was us who wasted the brain cells listening to your various

personal epiphanies.

Trying to figure out why Lisa will only keep it surface level with us and why she has to appear to be perfect.

Like she just can't get real and be vulnerable.

Sad.

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Back to the reading.

Terrence is like, so is June a travel month for you?

Yes, it is.

My daughter rides horses and competes usually in June.

Oh, good.

I was just wondering if I could crash at your place.

Okay.

But also,

oh, geez, look at this.

There's an injury.

Uh-oh, but it's not your child.

Your child's safe.

It's the animal.

I'm sensing horse injury.

Be careful.

Okay.

Well, this is a good one.

That's at least something you can

specific and unique.

Yes.

Yeah.

Yeah, that's a good one.

That's good.

Good job.

That's what I'm going to do.

I need parents to be like, you're going to prison.

You know what I mean?

I need him to like get things like that like you exactly faked a robbery at your house you know i want like a final destination thing like oh don't get on that plane you know or like hey that horse got injured i don't want to hear like oh i i'm sensing you're coming out with product it's like well that has already happened so that's not exciting yeah or like the sylvia brown style you know I was just talking about Sylvia Brown with one of my friends, like Sylvia Brown, how she used to do it where she'd be like, okay, I'm getting a B.

I'm sensing a B.

Oh, my husband's name is Bob.

Yeah, Bob's ugly.

Okay, anyone else next?

Sylvia Brown just rips people to shreds under the guise of spiritualism.

So Whitney's like, well, what did he say about your friendships?

Well, he's like, you get burned because you love people so big.

And then I want to do everything for people, but it doesn't work out great for me.

By the way, he said none of this.

None of that.

He goes out lying.

Lisa just saying.

Mary's like, he said that.

She goes, I'm powerful.

So now it's time for Angie's out.

Meredith's going to go back in.

And Angie's saying, it was fun.

It was really positive.

It was funny.

In June, he showed a horse and we do travel for Electra's show, but he said that it showed a possibility of an injury in the horse.

So Electra might be riding another horse.

And Mary's like, well, I mean, that doesn't mean it has to happen.

And she's like, but you know, horses do get injured.

So Lisa's like, okay, wait.

I mean, do you feel bad about anything that you've said?

Do you feel, do short people have like the ability to feel terrible?

I already apologized.

Sorry, I didn't hear it because I was all the way up here in the heights of being 5'6.

So Bronwyn goes, Bronwyn goes, but you talked about her kids' product.

And she goes, and she talked about your husband's scout dick.

Don't go low like that.

Come on.

Don't go low.

That's probably what you should have thought about before you start your husband's scout dick.

And I apologize for saying she sucks out dick.

I dude.

Yeah, you know what?

Look, I'm stopping.

I'm stopping.

Okay, I'm not going to say another word about you.

And then she's like, but you did.

You did.

No, but you started it because you started it.

Cause she sits in and she's like, I'm sorry I said anything, but like you did it.

You started it.

Oh my God, let's fight, five, five, five.

More, more fighting, more fighting, more fighting.

And it's just so annoying.

And Whitney just walks Lisa away from the table because they just keep starting over and over.

So

then Lisa is like, I grazed the surface, honey.

I grazed the surface.

I don't have a fucking space left.

I grazed the surface.

You are not cattle on a field.

I grazed it.

So

Mary is like, okay, let me let me talk to her.

Let me, let me talk to her.

Okay, I'm going to just, just calm down.

You're hurt.

Just calm down.

She's a jealous fucking bitch and she won't stop.

Okay, we'll just.

find somewhere to solve it.

She's fucking five.

Okay.

It's like talking to a toddler.

She's also like, no, taller than five, five feet.

Let's be honest.

So Angie,

Angie goes in for her reading.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

Angie goes in for hers.

And

Angie does not go into hers.

Meredith is getting her reading, and Angie goes in to get her props.

Oh, you're right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I just saw Angie goes in too.

Yeah.

So Angie goes in to get her big old, huge Tupperware props.

So Meredith is sitting there, and Terrence is like, so I look at this say and I say, God, someone is struggling with mental health.

Is it benzos?

Is it mental health?

Is it, is it a deeper drug?

Do you have any in your purse that you could share with me?

It was a long flight and honestly, nobody's really given me anything to work with here.

Can I have some pills?

You don't trust this friend's narrative.

Don't let that pull you down.

Live your honesty.

Remember this like, very interesting.

She does not believe it for one second.

Yeah.

So now Angie has her tub.

She's back to the table with the tub.

We're all wondering what it's going to be.

So she opens it up and there's a bottle of Vita tequila that's vacuum sealed and

heather goes oh my gosh are we scrapbooking because you know in that moment she like genuinely thought that was going to happen she's like wait a second i have i forgot to bring my bonnet for the scrapbook i may not understand psychics or american black express american express black cars but one thing i do understand is scrapbooking sisterhood and bronwin goes This is a race to the bottom.

Okay, Bronwyn,

we get the rage of the, she's going to say this every episode now.

Yeah, it's a race at the bottom.

I also, I actually was the one who started it.

Okay.

I mouthed it, and then Bronwyn said it first, and I said it back, and now she's saying it again.

So I kind of like started the race to the bottom thing.

Yeah,

this is so angry, though, to have a prepared thing and to just have the worst timing because Lisa's not even there.

Lisa's stormed out.

So Lisa's like leaving, and Whitney is following her.

So she's doing this without even having Lisa there.

She's just like, you know what?

It wasn't an appropriate time.

So I'm going to do it anyway because I had it planned.

So she's pulling out some books, the Vita, and there's a little horse that Lisa bought Elektra at one point.

So everyone's like, Angie, not the horse, not the sweet little horse.

No.

And Brahmin's like, I mean, the bigger insult for me here is that not that Angie brings the gifts to return.

It's that Angie clearly never wants these gifts.

That Vita is still vacuum-packed.

But to be fair, my Vita bottle is from Lisa is also vacuum-packed.

So

I guess we just all don't really like Lisa.

So I thought it was Whitney that walked out Lisa, but it wasn't.

It It was Mary.

So Mary's like, Lisa, you need to solve this.

You're an adult.

Show them how to solve things.

You need to go back there and show them how to do this.

And Lisa's like, you're so motivational.

Okay.

I want 10% of your income.

No, sorry.

Sorry.

I don't have that card anymore.

Sorry.

So she comes back

and Mary's like, so why do we have Tupperware?

Who, who has Tupperware?

Is this a thing that people still use?

And Angie's like, I thought since you took your product, you sent me me money back.

I brought you back the things you gave me.

Angie, you just don't get it.

I was like, no, I don't get it.

Angie, you're just upset that I'm working with Keras Das.

Oh, are you working with Keristas?

I don't believe you are even working with Keristas.

Oh, really?

Are you digging?

Did you dag?

Did you dig into it?

No, because you're not working with Keras Das.

You are not doing that.

So then Lisa goes, okay, so who's my best friend?

And everyone's like,

actually, that's a good question.

And Angie goes, Ben Affleck.

And actually, what's funny is that like, Andy, like, thinks for a long time, she looks away and she ponders.

She's like, what should my comeback be?

Ben Affleck.

Let's call the head of Kerasas then, and we'll tell her how upset you are.

You're really jealous.

Okay, you know what?

You guys, you guys both have beautiful fucking hair.

Who cares?

The only person with bad hair here is Britney, okay?

So into Whitney's reading.

So Terrence is like, why do you feel like communicating is upside down in the home?

I'm because that's how I hang.

Okay.

I don't really understand.

Well, for a while, I stopped being Whitney.

I stopped drinking.

I stopped getting piercings.

I stopped using a pole, but now I'm Whitney again.

So when I communicate, it's upside down.

Mm-hmm.

You kind of let the world take over.

Instead of you taking over the world, you have to be your authentic self, okay?

Yeah.

Wild Rose Beauty was the only thing that made me feel equal in our marriage.

And looking back, Justin showed no interest in it.

And I didn't realize how much I needed Justin's approval and how much it hurt me that he didn't want to be part of

Wild Rose Beauty cry.

It's hard because I love Justin, but I resent him and I don't feel like I can talk to Justin about these things.

Like, wow.

So

you realize you're detailing a terrible relationship right now, right?

Like, she's like, she's like, wow.

The only thing that made me feel like I was respected and equal in our marriage was for me to change exactly everything about who I am.

And I went into this, this endeavor, and he didn't even support me then.

So now I realize that I'm just going to go back to me and I think he'll like it.

I don't know because I can't even talk to him about things.

So anyway.

But from what we've seen on the show, didn't Justin was at all the events saying like they're going to put their life savings into her company, which they did and then lost it.

So didn't Justin kind of support the company?

I mean, he put his life savings into it with you.

And he may not have.

been into it.

Also, wasn't that part of his main company, Soul People, or whatever the thing?

Like he has an MLM company.

He's like an MLM person.

And then they rolled her company.

They rebranded her old company into Whitney Rose or Wild Rose and rolled that into a new

MLM under his MLM.

I think, I think this is how it's going.

I don't know.

This sounds weird to me because I think that they, I think it was both of their things.

So I don't know.

I'm confused about, I'm so confused about MLM life, you guys.

Somebody needs to explain it to me because it's hard to know.

But either way,

she feels unsupported.

She feels unsupported.

So now back at the table.

Anja, I didn't degrade anything your family's doing.

I didn't degrade cute Electra and her amazing horse hobbies.

You degraded my business.

Okay, you go, guys, I love both of you in very different ways.

And I feel like when I just dissed Britney's hair, you guys almost didn't even hear that.

And I just want to point out again that we all have great hair except for Britney.

Does anyone want to laugh this time?

No?

That was funny.

I love that she has no no problem just like, guys, we need to be nice to each other, but I'm going to attack Britney every sentence I have.

Britney is such a fucking punching bag for these women.

It is hilarious.

Like they will just go out of their way out of nowhere just to take a swipe.

Like, like, they'll be talking about something else entirely and be like, you know, just find some way to make it an insult on Britney.

And I love it.

And she doesn't even care.

That's what's so funny.

Britney just kind of laughs.

She like makes the thing like, guys,

God, we are such girlfriends, aren't we?

She's just happy to be there.

Yeah.

So Lisa's like, I got to go now.

Bye.

Bye.

So now she cuts through Whitney's reading.

Whitney's sitting there getting a reading.

And she's like, Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I got to go.

And Terrence is like, you've got a snake that you've got to get rid of.

Is there someone you think is a friend that you can't trust?

I'm sorry.

Has anybody seen my case?

Has anybody seen my case?

I don't know.

There's a snake.

It's getting closer.

It's getting close.

You,

Terry, do you know where my keys are?

The snake is breathing on my face right now.

Do you know who who the snake is?

No, I don't know who you could mean.

Who could it be?

So now, um, Angie is like, I don't even want to know.

I don't even know what to say right now.

You, you guys all want me to like kiss the ring, and I'm not going to sit here and be fucking made up and having her slinging mud at me.

I am sick of it.

Greek tears, Greek tears, Greek tragedy.

It's fucking getting old.

I am not going to be fucking bullied.

Wow, wow.

I am sick of this.

Wow.

So now she says she's being bullied because they're all telling her she has to be nice and make up with Lisa.

And I think her frustration is the typical, wait a minute, I'm fighting her.

You all were fighting her, but now you've decided that you're going to make up with her.

So now I have to make up with her and no one's on my team.

It's like in Orange County where Shanna's like, wow, how great.

I guess everybody's friends with Tamara again.

That makes me the asshole.

Yeah.

And I think Angie also, like, there's something, like, she has something where

when she is feeling cornered, she just feels like the, the world is against her.

And she's like trying to stand up for herself and be resilient.

And I think she like does not hear any reason.

So here she is.

She's ranting and she's saying, I am not going to be bullied into submission.

And then she takes the toy horse and she throws it behind her.

And Mary's like, oh, and she's like, you're going to hurt somebody.

Angie, Angie, you broke the horse.

And we see that the poor horse, this leg was broken.

I don't know why this is so sad to me.

This little cute toy horse that represented like a time of happiness in Electro's childhood.

And now it's being used for fodder in this housewife fight.

And now it's lying on the ground of the Enchante Vineyards with a leg that's been shattered off of it.

Sad.

Well, glue doesn't just make itself then.

So Mary's like, oh my God, that was Electro's horse.

You got to make glue to use glue on the horse.

But that was Electra's horse.

So he was right.

You got to give it to him.

It was true.

I think it was totally, this was a totally valid psychic prediction.

The guy said there's going to be a horse that gets injured.

And a horse literally broke its leg within the same episode.

That was amazing.

The most successful psychic moment ever to happen on Bravo.

But she is degrading me.

She's trying to make me look bad.

Soup man.

Yeah, who is the soup man?

I don't know anybody that sells soup.

It was a good question.

Who sells soup in Salt Lake City?

Like, I can imagine in New York City with the Seinfeld thing that you go into a bodeca and there's like a soup guy.

But like in Salt Lake City, is there a soup man?

That shit's funny.

So

Angie's, Mary's like, she's like, these are my cards.

I have cards.

I have reputation.

You guys are not like less.

And now she's starting to spin out.

And Mary's like, Angie, nobody's worried about your reputation.

We know better.

Now just stop it.

Stop taking it so hard.

It's not that deep.

And so Mary's like, Angie's just in a blind rage.

And I don't like being around that kind of feisty anger.

It's just unsettling for me.

And she's like, you're stronger than this.

I am stronger.

That's why I am not going back to this shit friendship.

You've gone back and you've gone back and you've gone back and you've gone back and you've gone back.

And everyone's like, Mary, like, Angie.

And then Mary's like, what did you just say to me?

Which I love when people say that.

That's like a great,

like.

When someone says, what did you just say to me?

You know, you're really in trouble.

That's a halting statement right there.

Yeah.

So she's like, you guys have all made up with her and she's like what and so now mary's mad and so now mary's like uh i'm not gonna be mad at lisa because you're gonna be mad at lisa and uh this isn't cool i got screamed at for trying to make peace and she's like mary you have made friends with her after she said horrible things about you and mary's like i'm done with you and now she's sorry

mary

oh honey honey honey honey mary

mary who just got upset that somebody got too mad over nothing is like i'm storming out now how dare you?

Yeah.

So Mary storms out through the, through Whitney's reading.

Of course, Whitney is having the longest reading.

She's just taking all her sweet time on this one.

And

now we just have Angie, Heather, Bromwin, and Britney at the table.

And Whitney comes back.

Angie's like, I am not going to sit here and take it.

I'm fucking not.

I don't eat soup.

I'm not doing anything illegal with anyone who sells soup.

Illegal?

I think it was just an implication of an affair, but now she's like,

I am not running a drug ring with someone who owns, who sells soup.

I am not smuggling soup.

And so Heather does her whole like, well, Bronwyn gives a speech.

She's like, look at me.

I've had the same experience.

I mean, Lisa shouts me down because she doesn't want to say certain things.

And she says things that are exaggerated or twisted.

And you can only control yourself.

And you don't have to take it, but you don't have to engage in it either.

Okay.

You don't have to engage.

So you see what she's doing and what she does over and over.

I see it.

We all see it.

We are sisters in this group and we see things together.

And that is our job as sisters.

That when we see something, we say something, but we all give each other grace.

Yeah, but is this what friends fucking do?

No, but we've been through a lot together.

We're women, women who go through things.

I love you guys.

I even kind of like Brittany.

And Brittany's like, hey,

thanks.

Angry and hurt about.

Brittany's

cactus needles from her fingers from stroking it last week.

What I am angry and hurt about is that she's willing to go so low and she thinks that she's going to make me afraid.

And I am not afraid of her.

Well, you shouldn't be afraid of her.

Oh my gosh, you guys, you guys, I have an announcement.

Jared has texted me.

He's called me four times and he's texted me one, two, three, four, five, six times.

I'm going to call him.

Are you guys okay with that?

I'm going to call Jared.

No, don't call Jared.

Don't call him.

We're in a sisterhood.

Okay, be pissed.

Remember, you're supposed to be pissed.

We got your back.

Hello, the dominant Osmond on the phone.

Hello.

Welcome.

Hi.

This is Bronwyn Newport calling.

I just want to say, do you pay Brittany's bills?

Quick question.

I have helped Brittany from time to time.

Okay.

Okay.

Well, that's great.

Okay, Jared, she's going to give you up for Lent.

So call her in May.

Bye.

It's over.

See you.

It's nice knowing you.

Bye.

I'm good.

That was Jared.

And they hang up on him him and they're like, oh my God, Bronwyn, Jesus.

And Bronwyn's like, as someone who's been accused of being a gold digger, wow, she could level up.

I mean, she really needs this.

I mean, we all see this, right?

Like, that I'm not the gold digger.

She's the gold digger, right?

Like, I mean, it's like crazy that I was even called a gold digger in the first place.

We really should talk about this a little bit more, guys.

And Whitney does her end song where she's like, oh, the drama,

but cheers.

Let's have some wine.

Some friends left quick Tears through facelifts.

Is this Mary Had a Little Lamb or Campdown Ladies, Whitney?

Oh, the drama, but the cheers.

Let's have some wine.

Some friends left quick.

Tears through facelifts.

It's like, oh, you were doing so well with Puff the Magic Dragon there, Whitney.

You really just lost your way.

Tears through facelifts, but there's always next time.

Okay, now it's the wind beneath my wings.

Get her off.

Get her off the TV.

And that was it for the for an extremely chaotic and hilarious episode.

It definitely was, it was definitely one we'll always remember for sure.

That poor horse.

That poor little soup guy.

I mean the soup guy.

Come on.

Soup guy.

Classic.

Soup man.

I love it.

All right, everybody.

We sure love you.

Thanks for being with us.

Check out videos on Crappins on Demand, video recaps, that is.

And this week's Trailer Trash is a Southern Charm Breakdown for the preview.

Go check that out.

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Find links to that and our Amazon lives over at the Lincoln bio on our Instagram page at Watch What Crappins.

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Bye.

Love a lot.

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