
#2766 RHOA S16E02 Part Two: Grilling the Hot Dog Man
This is part 2 of a 2-part recap!
Porsha is all out of sorts on this week’s Real Housewives of Atlanta because Dennis the Hot Dog Magnate is trying to get more camera time via Drew. Please don’t disrespect those that make us hair ambassadors, ma’am. To watch this recap on video, listen to our bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens.
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Hi everyone, Welcome back. This is part two of a two-part recap.
If you're wondering where part one was, well, go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. So that way you always get your episodes.
But enough of that. Let's get right back into the episode.
So now we go over to Kelly, and she's with her publicist, Lam Lamont and they're visiting a construction, not construction site, but a reno for a future outpost of Nana's Chicken and Waffles. So they're like, it's one of these scenes of like, oh my God, there's still so much left to do.
And like, why are we going to open in time for July 15th? I don't know. And she tells us that started nana's chicken and waffles in 2016 she did not have a culinary background but she learned to cook from her mother and her grandmother and then um but she's really excited about this because she says this can be like this this this building that they're working on right now this is going to be the franchise model like all the future waffle places are going to be just like this one, which unfortunately is not going to open in time.
Yeah.
And then she has her her project manager who's like, let me tell you this.
You pay me to be honest with you and I'm being honest with you.
We're not ready.
And she's like, why?
Why?
What do we need?
What do we need? She's very big.
You know, she's not used to being on TV yet.
So she's very much like, this is my Waffle House and it's going to be an empire. What do you mean we can't get the permits? How can we not get permits? Todd has restaurants.
Who cares? Just open them. He's like, well, because we're in jeopardy.
I mean, this guy's very dramatic. He's like, my sole job.
But when you brought me on, you said, Al, if we're ever in jeopardy of not opening in time, let me know.
So I'm here to tell you, Kelly, we are in jeopardy.
I'm like, all right, you'll open up five days later.
Relax.
She's like, I don't care.
No one tells the waffle maven, no, nobody stop waffling and get those permits.
See what I did there? I don't because i'm blinded by jeopardy i'm gonna have my waffles and i'm gonna eat them too and nobody in this town is gonna take me down you want to know how i keep all this syrup in me because i'm a waffle i'm a waffle i've got multiple walls up multiple little Multiple little spools with a stirrup in my hide.
If you prick me, do I not bleed a little bit of syrup out of one of my little waffle wells?
I was like, come again?
Sorry, I was just trying to go somewhere with it. Yeah.
So then she tells us a story about how she opened her first waffle place in a different town after she met mike oh no no wait i'm sorry yeah she she had two she had two waffle places the first one her ex i think like stole from her and like shut it down or something crazy like he took like a lot of money from her and shut down her restaurants. Now there's only one left.
I think that's what the story was.
Yeah, something like that.
The sort of tale of the waffles.
It actually is a fucked up story.
I'm giggling, but I'm giggling just
because anytime we talk about waffles, I just can't
have a straight face. I cannot have a straight face
being like, well, the first time I opened up
a waffle restaurant,
it was a great restaurant.
But my ex stole my waffle restaurant.
At first, the business started to fall off.
And I said, listen, we're not going to fall off.
Wait a minute.
Falafel waffle.
It failed, but I tried.
And then I came up with an amazing idea.
I came up with an amazing idea.
What if I took my waffle irons
and made omelets in them? I invented the womlet as made famous by Sheree Whitfield. But then my husband took that too.
Remember when Sheree Whitfield got the womlet? We love that place. Sheree Whitfield ordering a womlet.
That still is one of my favorite things. I'll have the womlet.
The womlet? You got got womlets i got womlets so then um we go over to meet well not meet bright but we see bright and her husband who hates her and this guy this fucking guy this guy literally this guy everything he needs to work on his um basement staircase walking did you notice this he He came barreling out of that basement. I was like, sir, it was like he had this speed.
Like he didn't realize he was at the top of the staircase yet. He was like going, you know, like you go up a staircase like bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.
But then as you get to the top, you slow down your gate and then you do that step, that first step out where you're like. But he was like, he like overshot the doorway.
Did you see the way he came rushing out of that basement? Was this just me? I don't know, but every husband on this show is going to be trained on how to get out of basement soon because this is a banner year for basements on The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Huge, huge.
Ralph is like taking notes. He's watching.
He's like, oh, so that's how you get out. Charades at home like, finally, we're having a basement season and I'm not'm not on it great we've also got a waffle lady when i ate a womlet damn it my timing is just never right work they're stealing my content they built this show on my back so brit's like so uh are we gonna watch that new movie i was telling you that i wanted to see on netflix he's like, yes.
And you're not going to be on your phone? He's like, I can't make any promises. I can't make any promises before we watch whatever god-awful movie you want me to watch on Netflix, because I'm pretty sure there's no good movie on Netflix anymore.
Yeah, and she's like, this is a consideration card that I'm talking about. I need some more consideration.
He's like, oh God, here we go with consideration. So she tells us her romantic story.
They got married during COVID because honestly, we all thought the world was going to end. And you just looked at the person who was right next to you and you were like, we're going to make this work because we're going to die together and someone has to teach me how to make bread because everybody's doing it.
And she met him when she launched her insurance agency and Mike was her client, but she didn't want to date her client. So they just became friends.
Who gets rid of a client for a man? If you just started your own insurance agency, you take the money before the man. That's what I say.
That's called insurance. Like, how would you not even know that? You an insurance agent so um yeah they uh they went from being client and insure insurer to lover and lovey and um listen you can't put a premium on love that's what i say so um then they facetimed for three months could you imagine imagine FaceTiming with your insurance agent for three months?
That's kind of weird.
That's pretty intense.
Are you sure you don't want to add collision? Please tell me again about the term life insurance. Do you cover travel insurance? so I was trying to think of the person who does the
percentages so i was trying to think of the person who does the who does the um percentages i'm actually the actuary i have a threesome because i know a good actuary who are those who are those is it the actuary and who's the other person who does who are the really really dry people that like don't have any sense of humor in their job. The adjusters.
They're very serious, right?
Like,
yeah. person who does who are the really really dry people that like don't have any sense of humor in their job the adjusters they're very serious right like yeah and i'm not just being like shady like we're told oh the adjusters they don't like you can't you you're like not allowed to joke with them if you're ever on the phone with them they like it's like no we don't they're like yeah they're like obliged not to joke an adjuster now i be completely wrong about this.
I could be just spreading misinformation,
but this is what I need to remember.
We were on a jet,
and then all Simon did really was to make a joke about an adjuster,
and then suddenly Homeland Security
and the FBI were surrounding the plane.
I didn't realize the first law of adjusting
is that you can't joke about adjusting.
It was my fault.
By the way, I'm sorry. I have to apologize because I have no idea what to do with my Porsche accent.
It's been years. I don't know.
Am I doing the high pitch voice? Am I doing the low pitch voice? I don't know what's going on. I apologize to the listeners because everyone's probably like, what the fuck has Ben been doing on this podcast right now? Well, me too.
Me too. It takes us a few episodes.
Sometimes I'm like, I'm Portia.
And then sometimes I'm like, I'm Portia.
Because Portia's gone through a metamorphosis, you know?
She's been on for a long time.
And when we see clips of her fighting with Kenya,
she is very much like,
you know, she did talk like that.
But now she talks a little bit lower.
And she also makes a lot of nene faces.
Have you noticed that?
She does like a lot of nene expressions.
She's an icon and we want to do her right.
And I don't know.
It's going to be a work in progress for me.
I'm like Jax.
It's a new era of Portia.
Let us adjust, will you?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Ronnie, Portia. Let us adjust, will you? Whoa, whoa, whoa, Ronnie.
Be serious. So, anyway, she was dating her insurance agent, and then they went to Vegas.
And I said, now, Mike, in Vegas, there's not going to be any hanky-panky. Oh, okay.
Okay, Britt. Okay, settle down, Anora.
What every man pays for trips to Vegas for it,
not having sex with their insurance lady.
Come on.
Yeah.
The man who bought you a diamond necklace on your... Oh, no, that was Dennis who bought her a diamond necklace on their first date.
Never mind.
I take it back.
When I tell you we had the best time,
I was like, okay, he might be the one. So their love story was hashed.
And then they had a baby. No, I'm sorry.
She wants to have a baby. I was going to say, they didn't have a baby? It was a dog.
The baby they had was a policy. My baby eating policy.
They had baby mimosa, a little poodle thing, who's very cute, by by the way they had like a little baby auto insurance policy that they took out for like the tire so they're talking about her remodel and she's like well i know you don't want to have another extra room but if we don't then that means mom is going to be in the room next to me now i'm willing to make some some adjustments to the budget because I'll take out all the high
end stuff from our place, but we need
a room for mom.
She's basically doing like,
honey, you're going to get me the house I want,
right? My dream house.
And she's got
traces of Lindsay Hubbard about her,
because she's like, okay,
question, do you want
to have a baby in this house or the next house? And he's like, why does it have to be so like structured and planned? She's like, because we're adults and I'm the planner and you're like just throwing against the wall kind of guy. And he's like, I know, but like do we have to build, choose our house based on where we're going to have a baby in it, you know? Like, I just want to see if things stick.
And she's like, well, see if it sticks. You can't see if a't see if a baby sticks like you can you know you think i can just be pregnant and show no emotions i'm just curious i'm like yeah but you know you don't have to buy the house on spec for the baby yeah it's another one of those where it's like you see somebody who is trying to make somebody into something they're not clearly like you're going to be interested and you're going to buy me a dream house right and he's like uh probably not he's just scrolling on his phone
she's like it's gonna work it's gonna be great everything's gonna be great i don't see this relationship going very far but guess what relationship i do see going far i got a text today from an unknown number that said what time do do you get off work today? And I said, why?
What do you want to do?
And she said, hi, I'm Kim.
Long time no see.
How are you recently?
I'm going to say missing you.
I say missing you.
So great to hear.
You should ask her.
You should ask what the pronouns are because Kim could go either way.
Okay.
What are your pronouns?
Yeah.
I want to see the next text. If she thinks that men in America should drink wine or if only in other countries.
I might've found love guys. So Brit's mom, uh, sort of lumbers into the kitchen and sits down and Brit's like, Oh, we talking about you mom like are you selling the house and are you going to move in with the baby because like you know we're like going to get pregnant this year and she's like and then Mike is like allegedly she's like oh finally a grandchild and she's like and stop saying allegedly by the way you see this negative energy you're putting out of the universe.
Yeah she's're going to have a baby. Oh, you are going to have a baby.
So Mike has a son who's 15, but he wants to experience being a girl dad, so they're going to do IVF so they can choose the sex. I feel like that's not...
Okay, I don't know the IVF journey, but from everything I have heard and seen, including on this very episode in a little bit, I hear IVF, like I get the impression that IVF is not just like this thing that you do. Like, oh, I'm just going to, I'm just going to do a little IVF.
I'm just going to put on some jeans. It's like a big, it's a process and it's like long and hard and it does a lot of stuff to your body.
And I'm just like, I feel like is, is, is Brit aware of this? I mean, this, this is based on just everything I've heard. It just seems like not the thing you're like, Hey, I'm just gonna get a little IVF and you know, then we'll figure out what we're going to do from there.
You know? Yeah. She's such a planner.
Yeah. I mean, it's hard, but you know, if you get to pick the baby, I don't know.
Well, all right. Well, I guess we'll see what happens with that.
So that's the plan. So speaking of which we now now go to Shmia visiting her surrogate, Shadina.
And I was like, I recognize this lady. And I then Googled and I was like, aha, this was Candy's surrogate.
And then, of course, I pressed play and it was like, she was Candy's surrogate. And I was like, oh, well, I felt special there for a moment for remembering something.
And then the show just blatantly told it. Yeah, it was Shadina.
And Shadina has given birth to a lot of babies. I mean, that's a lady who works.
Oh, my God. And you know what? Shadina has really learned, like a true housewife, how to parlay this opportunity into a bigger business.
Because when Shadina started, she was just like someone in Phoenix that they found on Craigslist or something. I don't know.
And now Shadina has her own surrogate agency shadina's like a leader in the surrogate world she's i was like damn shadina she's the mauricio umansky of surrogates she's like the dean agency agency so shadina this is actually a very touching scene because what happened was that Shadina was diagnosed with breast cancer that was stage 4 so they this is why Shiloh was born prematurely because they had to induce or whatever they did I don't know if it was like C-section or whatever but they had to have the baby early because Shadina needed to deal with her breast cancer. But then both of them carry a lot of guilt.
And so this scene is them kind of working that out a little bit because, uh, Shamia feels guilty because, uh, I guess there are risks that like with pregnancy that could cause, I guess a greater risk of breast she describes that um but then yeah there's just seasonal gestational breast cancer yeah and then shodina carries guilt because you know shiloh had complications and shodina wonders what the complications from her cancer was because they're born early so they both feel so much guilt and it was actually it was a very moving scene because uh and, and it was actually very touching in the way that they were both there for each other
and really supporting each other.
Cause this is a situation that could go very,
you know, bitter and sour with different people.
So it was, it was, it was very moving to watch
these two women sort of reconcile this situation.
Yeah.
And so basically she's gonna find her another surrogate
because she still wants to have kids. And they're like, I love you.
I love you, Shadina. She's like, I love you.
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So then we go back to Britt and her dog Mimosa, and they have now come over over to kelly's now this is so funny because these are two new housewives and they are total season one noobs because both of them are like oh my god hi hi especially the waffle lady like she is completely over the top you know i was cracking up so uh, Brittany's or Kelly's like, we're definitely both
dog moms, so we always get our bitches together. Am I right? Al comes bursting in.
Somebody tell those bitches that we're in jeopardy. Jeopardy of not opening the waffle restaurants.
So, they're talking about their... Kelly's like, girl, I was up at 5 a.m.
this morning. I'm working on waffle, waffle contingencies.
Lots of planning going into the new waffle place. And she's like, well, tell me about it.
Mike woke up early and then he went on Instagram watching shit loud and cracking jokes. I'm like, hello, do you not see a bitch trying to get her beauty rest? That insurance isn't going to sell itself, am I right? So Kelly's like, so are we going to do a celebration? Are we having a wedding? Would you be opposed to a wedding cake that's just a giant stack of successively smaller waffles? I'm sorry, I didn't see you were drinking.
You're a Starbucks. I was like, wait, I'll leave me hanging with my waffle wedding cake joke there, Ronnie.
So, Britt is like, Britt's like, No, I will say ceremony, but I want a huge wedding a huge wedding. I want something that's sexy.
I want something that's glamorous, but intimate. You know what I don't want to go to? A sexy wedding.
Go fuck yourself. It's bad enough I have to come to your wedding in the first place without it being a sexy wedding.
Nobody wants a sexy wedding. I don't want any theme to any wedding that I'm going to or any wedding that I may or may not have.
There's just no theme. The theme is food, maybe.
The theme is let's eat. Okay? But there's no nothing beyond that.
Although I do have to say, I have to give credit to my friends Jake and Cassie, whose friends we met in Cincinnati this weekend. They had a wedding at a Ren Faire, which is pretty cool.
And everyone in the wedding had, I mean, I would not have liked to dress up at Ren Faire for a wedding, but it is kind of cool that they were like, we're doing a Ren Faire wedding. And everyone, everyone who attended went to a Ren Faire and they dressed in Renaissance clothes.
That's kind of cool. I mean, I was pretty cool.
Here's my favorite kind of wedding. A quick one.
Okay. Make it fast.
fast five minutes five minutes and feed this the end
okay i won't watch you dance with your mom feed me fma fm fma fm five minutes and feed me
i agree so britney talks about her you know having a zoom opportunity to have her wedding
because hers was during the pandemic so they just went to the courthouse filed paperwork and
in the So Brittany talks about her, you know, having a Zoom opportunity to have her wedding because hers was during the pandemic. So they just went to the courthouse, filed paperwork and did a Zoom.
And she's like, you know, I feel I didn't feel great about that. But being a wife was way more important.
Now maybe I'll get a house that I want without marble or wallpaper or carpet. Or travertine.
There will be no travertine. At least that's what Mike says, because I think he actually named our baby travertine.
It's sort of a nice name to think about it. I said, are you paying the IVF doctor? He said, yes.
The travertine doctor? Yes. I'm going to get pimples all over my nose from doing that.
I need stop now I was like I really enjoy this impersonation but it's really annoying to keep having to touch my nose I'm gonna like so we see a flashback of Shamia's birthday party and Portia showing up late because oh they make a joke about like don't show up late to the birthday to the wedding and we see a flashback of how Port portia did that it was like tacky so brit is like yeah that whole situation where she was like going in on drew by the way and kelly's like it shocked the waffle out of me i was like what is happening here i thought we were like gonna finish our conversation i mean one minute i was a waffle the next minute i was a pancake i was just flattened by that whole thing. Am I right, girl? And Britt tries to make this Kenya thing happen where she's like, oh, and yeah.
And remember when Kenya was like, so where's your wedding band? Why is it so crazy to ask someone who's bragging about being married where their wedding band is? I don't understand why this is crazy or why you're mad at Kenya. Yeah, sure.
Kenya can be shady, blah, blah, blah. But you're barking up the wrong tree if you think you're going to win against Kenya.
Now, technically you did because Kenya got kicked off the show. But Kenya only lost that one because she just went too far.
She got herself kicked off, not you. Okay.
So no victory laps for you, ma'am. And nothing's to say that Kenya won't come back.
I don't know if this is necessarily going to be a permanent firing. She may be in penalty box, but who knows.
So, Kelly is like, I mean, I'm sorry, excuse me, hashtag waffle. First of all, have you even seen my friends ring Kenya? And Brittany's like, yeah, I mean, I'm like, how about you worry about your divorce? Like, why are you worried about if I got a wedding band or not? She says, girls, they see me and they're like, oh, she's pretty.
She's like, she looks like a mean girl. But when you actually get to know me, I'm like the sweetest person you've ever, ever met.
The sweetest, hottest insurance lady in all of Atlanta. This is our favorite character.
The one who's like, you know what? Girls are mean to me because they're jealous. No, they're not.
Yeah. Okay.
You're an asshole. You're an asshole.
And also this whole bragging about like, oh, wow, well, she's divorced. Why don't you worry about that instead of worrying about me? Who's married? You know, actually, she's got the better deal.
She's already dealt with the shitty man and gotten rid of him. Okay.
You're still in the shitty man chapter. Okay.
Don't act like you have some price. Your man looks fucking miserable, okay? And he won't get you the finishes you want in your house, and he won't get a room for your mom, and he won't even watch a movie with you without scrolling on your phone.
I don't know what the fuck you think you're bragging about, Zoom wedding, but calm down. So she says, speaking of divorces, as your friend, like, I wanted to give you time to kind of share whatever you wanted to share and not be like, girl, what's the tea? So this is my way of saying, like, if you want to have a scene right now talking about your marriage, then now I'll be, thank you so much for that platform that you're giving me, Brit.
Yeah, there was cheating and he almost took $500,000 of your money.
Yes, it was out of the company's money. It was all in the shape of little waffles.
But, you know, we shall rebuild. So, yeah, he ripped off the company account.
He emptied it. And so then she went to Tulum for her birthday trip.
An accountant called her and said, what's your bank account? So now she's suing him to get it back. And then it got so nasty that it got physical and the police were always being called.
And it just was a total shit show, basically. And so the girls are dealing okay with it.
And they've got each other's back. And they're like, I love you.
I love you. I love you.
I love you. I love you.
Can't wait till you hate each other in five minutes. Yeah, exactly.
So now it's time to go to the gym because Drew, Angela, and Shamia are all going to go to all around fitness. I guess that drop it with Drew was not open that day.
So I also like a noncommittal fitness place. It's just like all around fitness, whatever you want to do.
You want to do a treadmill, do the treadmill. You want to do a pull up, go ahead.
There's a bar over there. You want to run in place, what the fuck do I care? It's all around.
Just do whatever you want. Hey, hey, did you work out today? Yeah.
What'd you do? I don't know, just like all around fitness. So Drew's like, Angela and I have been friends for three years we're shy town girls right for sure we're always going to be bonded she's never going to turn against me she's not going to hate me in about three episodes it's going to be great and shamia portion i have been in a group chat for years so i'm hoping that after the other night at shamia's party we can just work out and get our endorphins going.
Because the other night he was very, very negative about a true angel, I would have to say. So Angela comes in and is like asking how Drew is.
And she's like, I'm not going to lie. Saturday at Shamia's party, it kind of felt like it took me some steps back.
So Angela has already come in here deciding, fuck fuck this I'm not going to pretend to be Drew's friend because and this happened this has happened with Drew before where people come on as her friend and there didn't happen with Tanya Tanya or Sonia no it happened with Sonia Sonia member of the classic thing you come in as this is a classic house I think you come in as someone's friend you fight some perfunctory battles to prove that you're a friend and then you get to have a scene where you say all this time i was sticking up for this person and like just blindly without realizing that no one likes them and i should be hanging with the popular girls so you know that's what it's hilarious that it's happened to drew two times in a row i mean that's pretty good that's a record so they brought in this other lady to be her friend and episode two and she's like yeah i'm not doing that nope she sucks so she's like uh girl sit down listen i'll be honest in that moment i was like drew why are we working with him i mean out of all the people in at, the hot dog guy, the hot dog guy, you could have at least called my husband. He just made Brussels sprouts for 900 people.
Why? Nobody knows. She goes, listen, Angela, I have been signed to so many legends.
You know, there was my record deal with Joe Isuzu. There was the time I signed with the Chia Pet.
Also um also you know the little caesars cartoon guy he you know we had a great working relationship but we just never produced any good music i actually had a very sexy song produced by the people who created the hawaiian role so that was big um i i did some work with mary j blodge who is not related to Mary J. Blige, but I thought she was.
So, understandably, that was confusing.
Turns out she was just the lady who worked at Jamba Juice.
And then Dennis came to the table with an offer.
You know, he was holding a hot dog because it was an after party filled with hot dogs.
And I thought, you know what?
This is perfect.
You know, and Portia should just tell me how she feels instead of aggressively attacking me and accusing me of things. You know, Dennis has been an advocate for me and for Ralph as well.
So we know that he only stands behind good people. Am I right, girls? Am I right? Angela's like, is this the longest you've been separated? Well, I mean, we've never really been separated.
We've always been on the same floor. So it is a little weird, but we've had arguments.
But once he moved out of the bedroom, our divorce became like a war. And it's just like, it's just like, you know, I just, this is why I don't like to come out and just talk publicly about my relationship because I go into the studio and I pour it into my art, you know? I pour it into my songs.
And when I get out there and I sing Pizza Pizza, you know it comes from the heart. So then we find out from Drew, and this really does suck.
Oh, my gosh. She's like, well, Ralph has taken large sums of money, and he's also asking for alimony percentages of my business child support what the fuck ralph i thought you were ralph is super super successful businessman who didn't need anybody anything from anybody because you were so rich and you're writing self-help books to teach other men how to be rich right fucking poser ralph like that's a shock to anybody who's seen you for five minutes.
But still, get some self-respect. Yeah.
Drew is ridiculous, but Ralph is worse. And, of course, he's doing all this.
Of course he is. Yeah.
So then... Drew's ridiculous, but she's harmless.
And Ralph is harmless. Yes.
Ralph is harmful. He is.
Yeah. It's called Wreck-It Ralph, not like Be Chill Ralph.
So Shamia comes in
and she's like,
I'm ready for a drop it with Drew,
which was also the first time
anyone's ever said that.
And she says,
you know,
I don't want to beef with Drew
because, you know,
this is all between Drew and Portia
and Dennis is not a part of this group.
So we just have to put this to rest.
So they all start working out on everything. They did their workout scene and then they're left alone.
And Drew is like, you know what? So guys, this workout's good because how am I trying to get ready for the stage? Because I'm pretty sure Tamar's going to call me back. I don't know.
I don't mean to drop any names, but it could happen. And I just really want to be in the best shape of my life.
Which is why I'm dating a man who only feeds me hot dogs. This is going to work out great.
So she's like, so are you doing an EP doing an album? Like, what are you doing? Oh, gosh, we have close to 30 records done. It's crazy.
You should hear my voicemails because he just sends me ideas and I send him voicemail ideas. I mean, we're basically the Beatles.
Oh, wait, here's a new one that I just, I've been working on. I wrote this one myself.
It goes like this. I'm loving it.
So then Angela's like, uh-huh. So Shamia, your party, you just blurted out, like, are you fucking? I mean, are you fucking Dennis? Why do you have to do that at the party? And she's like, it came from rumors.
And she's like, well, I'm shocked that you had to do that for Portia. Because, you know, basically you're Portia's secretary.
Is that what you're doing? You're just Portia's secretary now. So that's great.
You're Portia's assistant. And Shamia's like, wow, why are you coming in so hot? She goes, so did you ask the...
Oh, so I remembered this as her going against Drew. But she's going against Shamia.
No but she's going against shimmy no she wants the end shimmy yeah so i'm sorry i take all that back i take well she challenged drew a little bit by saying why of everyone in atlanta where there's so many music producers i mean people who are willing to work with kim zolciak why of all the people do you choose the hot dog guy who is you know had a baby with portia and it's a valid question but she what she really does though is she's she's being i still think the theory remains she's going after shimmya right now uh but i still think that she's going to fight with shimmya and portia and then she's going to she's really just to earn bona fides with you know drew and then she will switch over to porsha Portia and Shamia and she will earn credit with them because she'll say all this time, I thought I was doing the right thing as a good friend, but it turns out I was being used by Drew. And then that will earn her all sorts of good grace because she's talking shit about Drew and she'll be brought into the fold.
That's my theory. Yeah, so she's like, well, you were just asking that question for Portia.
She goes, no, I asked for myself.
You know, and if you were listening
and Shamia's telling us, you know,
oh, wow, who knew that this girl could even speak?
Because at my birthday party when Portia was handed
when handed it to Drew,
she was just a little church mouse.
So Angela's like, you're not going to
just bulldoze me. Charles
Oakley. Heard of him?
I bet you like white wine on the continent.
So then Shamia is like, she basically turns to Drew and is like, can you explain your friend, please?
And Drew's like, look, I don't want to beat a dead horse at this point, okay?
But I wanted us to come and have fun together here. And Shamia's like, well, yeah, guess what? I had my endorphins.
I'm happy. I'm ready to go.
Bye. Yeah.
So then Drew's like, you know what? If they put up a graphic, if you look up lapdog in the dictionary, you'll see a picture of Shamia. It's like, oh my God, this is like your fourth season and that's the best you got.
Do you have no gays there? Get a gay girl. It's been rough.
Also, I want to say we're two episodes in and they still have not fixed the green screen work on this show. Like, could you at least add a drop shadow underneath those chairs? They're like floating.
They're floating and not to like the wrong size. Everyone is like shorter than the coffee tables in the background.
And there's not even a drop shadow.
Just come on.
This is like easy stuff. Yeah.
Well, they're not going to fix it this season. I think they think it looks good so far.
So then, um, Portia, we go to Portia and it says Portia's ex-fiance, Drew's business partner, Dennis, because they're at a kid's place and Dennis is there to shoot. so Portia's like well we're great parents
to Pilar but you know
there's such a loss from the divorce and
you know now there's closeness because they're at a kid's place and Dennis is there to shoot. So Portia's like, well, we're great parents to Pilar,
but, you know, there's such a loss from the divorce.
And, you know, now there's closeness from both of us.
And that's just what Pilar needs.
So she's doing all the rides and slides and stuff.
And Dennis comes in and she's like, so what about Drew?
And he's like, we're just doing business together.
Have you ever heard a hot dog sing?
Me neither, but you will soon. She's like, well, you say business, but Drew, in front of our crew, said something completely different in all of this.
And he's like, well, what is she saying? Well, she said that you were her Jesus, her Lord Jesus Christ and Savior. And then we flashback to Drew saying, Dennis has been my angel on earth.
You know what what there i was crawling through the desert and i looked up at the sky and down down came so many so many hot dogs all of us could eat for 40 days and 40 nights uh you're learning look at you i'm gonna convert you yet uh that was excuse me that was that was from the Jewish part of the Bible.
I am aware of the... That's true.
That's true. I'm like, no, I have not learned anything, Rodney.
I was thinking of the multiplying the hot dogs. That was in the New Testament when Jesus was like, you got one hot dog? How would you like 90? And people were like, hot dogs for life.
Yes. Did you hear that Jesus walked on hot dogs? so Dennis is like listen
Drew's going through a divorce with my homeboy, you know? And you know how it is. And she's like, what does that have to do with me? And he's like, listen, you had 16 marriages on TV and I had to see all of that.
And I was in pain, all right? And we share some similar things we can create music on, you know, like being screwed over on national television. And I told Drew that she should have a conversation with you about go naked.
But I didn't feel like I even had to do that. And, you know, this is this is my business.
Why do I have to get permission from you? this doesn't make any sense okay so yes okay he's entitled to feel pain and feel frustration and
watching you know his beloved porsche go off and marry someone else and he can feel lots of emotions but that doesn't qualify you to suddenly be a music producer for for anyone it's like we all feel things and have motion i don't say oh you know what i should probably be a music producer now i'm kind of bummed today yeah i'm gonna make a pitch it's like you're making your way back onto my own television show by fucking somebody or by at least flirting with the idea of having a relationship with somebody else on the show you you slimy fuck that's what she's saying and he's like well what i can't make an album so she's like okay so i'm concerned you know i'm concerned with her as a person who's supposed to be my friend who will try to bring my child's father and film with him in my territory. And he's like, well, listen, if she's going to use the platform for promotion and I'm working on the thing that she's promoting, it's only natural that I'm here.
Now you're pissing me off. Okay, this is too much.
And he's like, well, I don't want to piss you off. You want to film with her in this? He's like, no, no, no.
Why? He's like, it's very important. Why? So then Pilar comes over.
They have to be nice. And she basically says again, she's like, I don't care about Dennis.
Like, I have no expectation. It's like the one thing that she wants is don't film with Drew on the show.
Like, you are my storyline. You don't get to be her storyline.
Yeah. yeah so then they drive off together but they still have their mics on and she's like okay well when you show up and crying by the way first she goes in the bathroom and cries and tells the producer and she's like saying this is where she explains that like this she like if if i fall out with dennis which is very likely he can use my own platform against me and I'm not going to do that.
Right. So then they drive off and they've got their mics on and she's like, listen, when you show up anywhere on these cameras with somebody else, it's going to be a problem.
Another damn housewife, that looks absolutely insane. And he's like, you know we're on the hot mic, right? And she goes, oh yeah, you're a pro now, right? He's like, no, I just was saying like, we could kind of get free studio time right now because we don't have to pay for this recording.
She's like, okay. Okay.
You want to try one of my new singles? I've just written 30. So.
Every promotion is not a good promotion. At the end of the day, you get nothing for nothing.
So guess what? He's like, wait, can you do that one again? Then we have a hot mic. I just want to want to okay can we record this back in the studio listen who are we we heard about you with family we represent us this represents family so he's like well the album was supposed to come out a month ago and she's supposed to do some promo for it on the show and she goes okay you know what do what you do and it's going to work out how it happened how it happens and he? And she's like, Mark, how this looks for your daughter, okay? I don't even know why I stopped right there.
You know what? Because she's just stopped in the road. She just stopped in the road to bitch him out.
And then she's like, why am I stopped? And she goes, Scott, you got me doing stupid shit. I can't count on anybody.
And he's like, come on, P. And she's like, shut up.
So that's the end. He's not going to listen.
He's just going to keep doing this show. But you know what? You married a camera hungry dude.
You know? Hot dog. That's a hot dog.
Hot dog whore. He's a hot dog whore.
Well, that was the episode. What a fun time.
Thanks, everyone, for being here. We'll be back.
We've got a lot going on going on this week so stay tuned to our feed we've got crappy hour coming up in about an hour by the little bob yeah by the time this comes up but the point is this thanks for being here go check out our shows uh ticket links for our shows this weekend in charlotte and atlanta and we will catch you in the next episode and bye watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King.
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